more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex! Because then if your dream mayunnn comes along and sees you've hooked up he won't wanna marry or have baybeeeez with you. http://diamonddiploma.com/a-letter-to-girls-hooking-up/ To all the fundie males who have some fucked up Madonna whore complex thing going on yet don't hold yourselves to the same standards, here's a resounding FUCK YOU!!!!! My dream mayunnnn won't mind one bit that I had a life before him, and he certainly won't be pee brained enough to think I cannot possibly be a good wife just cuz I dare to like sex. If a man has this disorder (yes I call it that,) its his job to take care of it, not women's to cater to it. Sincerely, Unapologetically sexual lady who makes a fiercely loyal partner (when in a relationship) and whos never a bore in the sack!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404309#msg-404309Sat, 07 Mar 2026 02:23:08 +0000 Phorum 5.2.20 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,405569#msg-405569 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,405569#msg-405569
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Dorisan
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screaming sausage
Are these fundies convinced this god of theirs created everything but the clitoris?

Probably. Why else would some cultures cut it off as a rite of female puberty?

Because they are incredibly stupid.]]> freya The PatioTue, 03 May 2016 06:28:09 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,405568#msg-405568 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,405568#msg-405568I've had men reject me for my hair color, my size, my job, and just about anything else you can think of and many of these were men who walked up to me and initiated a conversation with me then announced they were rejecting me. Or it was a first date where an explanation wasn't expected. Very few take the high road. Other than a few words I hadn't accepted any of them in the first place. My favorite was one who started talking to me and rejected me because I wasn't a model (he told me this) because my 5'6" height didn't clue him in and as if there are any models in the middle of the country or anywhere else that would want him. Bet he was baffled as to why I stopped talking with him. One guy told a bunch of people we were having sex and I had no idea who he was. Once he was pointed out to me I walked up to him in a very crowded hallway, introduced myself and loudly said it was great to finally meet the guy I'm having sex with. That shut up all the gossip.

I think you have to watch out because in my experience most people are incredibly stupid and this article is written by one. Just leave the stupid ones in the dust as soon as you figure it out, whether on the first date or after sex. Pretty soon they'll most likely "accidentally breed".]]> freya The PatioTue, 03 May 2016 06:27:31 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404778#msg-404778 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404778#msg-404778
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screaming sausage
Are these fundies convinced this god of theirs created everything but the clitoris?

Probably. Why else would some cultures cut it off as a rite of female puberty?]]> Dorisan The PatioSat, 16 Apr 2016 23:59:14 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404776#msg-404776 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404776#msg-404776
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yurble

The used gum metaphor is known to have been used in an abstinence-only sex "education" class taught in public schools in the US. Those students are presumably a captive audience.



I am completely unfamiliar with that curriculum. If that's the case, then yes, they are a captive audience because they are required by law to go to school.

I am not a supporter of abstinence-only sex ed. I do believe that students should be taught the risks that accompany sex, particularly if it is unprotected. You could get a number of infections, some which never really leave your body. If you are infected, it may in fact impact your future sex life, so be careful.]]> StudioFiftyFour The PatioSat, 16 Apr 2016 23:34:15 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404766#msg-404766 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404766#msg-404766
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StudioFiftyFour
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yurble
Respect is common courtesy. I have said multiple times that I think people are and should be free to choose their friends and partners.

I just don't think that saying nasty things about women who have sex, from the position of a pulpet or in a classroom, complies with respectfulness/common courtesy.


You don't like it, and you have a right not to like it, but I find it perfectly acceptable. And in the US, it is completely legal, too.

People have the right to free speech, free expression, and free association.

If people were being forced to hear such a message, it would be a violation of individual rights and liberties. But no one is being forced to attend any particular class that I know of, or being forced into a certain church that might preach that message. (There have been cases of extremist cults that refuse to let their members leave. In the past, authorities have had to break these up, sometimes by using force. I oppose any forced religion or association. People should be free to listen to or refuse to listen to any religious message they choose.)

The used gum metaphor is known to have been used in an abstinence-only sex "education" class taught in public schools in the US. Those students are presumably a captive audience.]]> yurble The PatioSat, 16 Apr 2016 16:55:09 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404765#msg-404765 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404765#msg-404765
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yurble
Respect is common courtesy. I have said multiple times that I think people are and should be free to choose their friends and partners.

I just don't think that saying nasty things about women who have sex, from the position of a pulpet or in a classroom, complies with respectfulness/common courtesy.


You don't like it, and you have a right not to like it, but I find it perfectly acceptable. And in the US, it is completely legal, too.

People have the right to free speech, free expression, and free association.

If people were being forced to hear such a message, it would be a violation of individual rights and liberties. But no one is being forced to attend any particular class that I know of, or being forced into a certain church that might preach that message. (There have been cases of extremist cults that refuse to let their members leave. In the past, authorities have had to break these up, sometimes by using force. I oppose any forced religion or association. People should be free to listen to or refuse to listen to any religious message they choose.)


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yurble
It is personal but it is also cultural. For instance it is well-known that the female breast is considered sexual in some cultures and not in others. What I would like is to promote a culture which recognizes a broad range of normal between consenting adults, where individuals will be able to express their innate personal preferences. Fundy teachings narrow the definition of 'normal' and add preferences/constraints to people they might not otherwise have.

I agree. I don't have any interest in regulating anything that goes on in people's bedrooms, as far as what consenting adults want to do.

But if fundamentalists want to preach certain values or norms for sexuality, that's fine too. Even if I disagree with their message, they still have First Amendment rights to free speech, expression, and religion. And as long as no one is being forced to hear or abide by their message, I see nothing wrong with it.


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yurble
For fuck's sake, when have I ever said anything remotely like that? I have repeatedly promoted personal choice in relationships. I have repeatedly objected to institutionalizing and teaching those preferences. The fundies are grooming for a purity fetish.


So what? They'd say that your message is grooming for something else.

Either way, I favor free speech and expression. In the same way I favor their right to make a claim, I equally support your right to make a claim as well. If your message is objectively better than theirs, most people will gravitate toward yours. And they have a right to be critical of your message, and you have a right to be critical of their message. That is the marketplace of ideas and it is a beautiful thing.

As long as no one is being forced to abide by certain standards or listen to messages that they do not want to hear, I have no issue with either.]]> StudioFiftyFour The PatioSat, 16 Apr 2016 16:46:07 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404713#msg-404713 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404713#msg-404713
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StudioFiftyFour
As far as respect goes, I don't know if I agree. What do you mean by "respect?"

I do believe that common courtesy is important in polite society. You don't slam the door on others, you don't bother your neighbors, you abide by the laws. Other than that... what do you mean by "respect?" Does "respect" mean that you open up your dating pool to just anyone? That isn't "respect," that's "entitlement" on the part of those who are currently being rejected.

Respect is common courtesy. I have said multiple times that I think people are and should be free to choose their friends and partners.

I just don't think that saying nasty things about women who have sex, from the position of a pulpet or in a classroom, complies with respectfulness/common courtesy.

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StudioFiftyFour
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yurble
What I disagree with is that it is acceptable for people to teach these preferences as the truth on a broad scale when that so-called truth results in disrespectful treatment of much of society. That is where we disagree, I think. You are more libertarian, whereas I think bigotry like sexism and racism will never diminish if they are treated as personal preferences.

"Truth" in sexual preference comes from your heart, your mind, and your hormones. What you "want" sexually is very visceral in nature. It doesn't connect with logic very well.

It is personal but it is also cultural. For instance it is well-known that the female breast is considered sexual in some cultures and not in others. What I would like is to promote a culture which recognizes a broad range of normal between consenting adults, where individuals will be able to express their innate personal preferences. Fundy teachings narrow the definition of 'normal' and add preferences/constraints to people they might not otherwise have.

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StudioFiftyFour
So I ask you, yurble, is that wrong as you see it? Should I be compelled--or at least, pressured--to date these people? Even though I have no interest?

For fuck's sake, when have I ever said anything remotely like that? I have repeatedly promoted personal choice in relationships. I have repeatedly objected to institutionalizing and teaching those preferences. The fundies are grooming for a purity fetish.

Is it really that difficult to understand the difference between acting on a personal preference in your own life and teaching that preference to others as if it were the only option?]]> yurble The PatioFri, 15 Apr 2016 08:32:30 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404709#msg-404709 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404709#msg-404709
Funny shit: once a black man told me that I am racist because I didn't want to date him :D]]> mrs. chinaski The PatioFri, 15 Apr 2016 07:34:36 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404691#msg-404691 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404691#msg-404691
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yurble
Has anyone on the thread said they are owed sex or marriage?


It has been more than implied that if a man prefers a virginal bride, he's wrong for doing so; hence, the non-virginal bride has the right to stomp her feet and demonstrate some sort of entitlement toward a date, sex, marriage, etc.

Me? I personally don't care. People have baggage. Other people have the right to accept or reject that baggage. Some may see certain baggage as a non-entity, while others may see it as a deal enhancer, and others still may see it as a deal-breaker.

If people can't get over that another person (or group of people) won't date them, marry them, sleep with them, etc., they need professional help. Seriously. This is the kind of mentality that breeds obsession, compulsion, and stalking.


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yurble
As for respect, everyone has the right to demand respect in their relationships, and should. Society also expects a certain amount of respect toward strangers, as in it is fine to say among friends that you think women who have sex are sluts, but it is unacceptable to stand on a streetcorner yelling at every woman that passes that she's a slut.


That kind of harassment--yelling slurs at specific people in public--is against the law in the US. I am sure it has happened somewhere, at some time. But as a person who has been to cities all over this country, I haven't ever witnessed this once. I would classify this kind of behavior as being insane.

As far as respect goes, I don't know if I agree. What do you mean by "respect?"

I do believe that common courtesy is important in polite society. You don't slam the door on others, you don't bother your neighbors, you abide by the laws. Other than that... what do you mean by "respect?" Does "respect" mean that you open up your dating pool to just anyone? That isn't "respect," that's "entitlement" on the part of those who are currently being rejected.


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yurble
What I disagree with is that it is acceptable for people to teach these preferences as the truth on a broad scale when that so-called truth results in disrespectful treatment of much of society. That is where we disagree, I think. You are more libertarian, whereas I think bigotry like sexism and racism will never diminish if they are treated as personal preferences.

"Truth" in sexual preference comes from your heart, your mind, and your hormones. What you "want" sexually is very visceral in nature. It doesn't connect with logic very well.

While I think it is certainly immoral to exclude groups of people from public accommodations, it is in no way immoral to say, "I don't date people of this particular group."

Some people want to marry/date/sleep with a person of their own color. Or the opposite color. Or of their own faith. Or of the opposite faith. Or of a certain financial status... on and on, so on and so forth. This is a personal preference and it does not matter to me.

I can tell you that I personally have taken a load of crap from people who just couldn't comprehend why I wouldn't date single mothers. I don't want to date single mothers. It's not my preference. I don't want to take care of another man's child.

So I ask you, yurble, is that wrong as you see it? Should I be compelled--or at least, pressured--to date these people? Even though I have no interest?

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yurble
Because there's a double standard on sexual purity, it is not about the action, which is a private action at any rate (in that it affects nobody other than the participants), but about the femaleness of the person being judged.


I don't really care about double standards. People have the right to hold anyone to whatever standard they choose, in the realm of sex and love.

Comparable to that... I would hold a surgeon about to operate me to a much higher standard than the teenager at 7-11 who pours me an Icee and sells me lottery tickets. If my surgeon showed up to the surgery intoxicated, I'd run. The teenage kid behind the counter? I really wouldn't care.

Two different people, both serving me in some capacity, different standards.]]> StudioFiftyFour The PatioThu, 14 Apr 2016 23:05:31 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404690#msg-404690 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404690#msg-404690
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ladybug2203

I should clarify when I said "you" I wasn't specifically targeting studiofiftyfour, I meant "you" the audience as a whole. You have to admit the article seems to believe all women should be virginal before marriage if any man will want them, and its such a sweeping generalization.


Point taken.

Keep in mind that articles are usually aimed at their audiences. Articles aimed at fundamentalists will have that slant on them. Men with certain religious beliefs may by a wide majority, prefer a virginal bride. Other men may feel neutral on the topic. Others still will prefer someone with experience.

Women or men who are vain enough to think that they will be "a catch" to all or even most members of the opposite sex will be disappointed when that fantasy does not manifest itself.]]> StudioFiftyFour The PatioThu, 14 Apr 2016 22:31:04 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404657#msg-404657 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404657#msg-404657
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StudioFiftyFour
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yurble

You have said that women who have lots of sexual partners will have fewer potential marriage partners. I have named two ways in which that could be the case. One, all men prefer women without experience, but some will settle for women with experience. Two, there are men who prefer experience, men who prefer inexperience, and men who are neutral, but far more men prefer inexperience to experience. Which of these is the reason that you think women with lots of sexual partners will have fewer marriage offers, or is there a third reason that I haven't thought of?

Also, why do you think that statement (about fewer marriage offers) is true? Personal observation, rigorous study, or what you were taught?

Some religions preach chastity among women. If you live in an area with a high percentage of men from those religions, you may have fewer marriage partners to choose from.

True. And if you live in an area with a low number of religious people, and you want to wait until you are married, you may have fewer marriage partners to choose from.

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StudioFiftyFour
And I find myself scratching my head as to why other people believe that it's their right to basically demand that other people respect them, date them, sleep with them, marry them, etc.

Has anyone on the thread said they are owed sex or marriage?

As for respect, everyone has the right to demand respect in their relationships, and should. Society also expects a certain amount of respect toward strangers, as in it is fine to say among friends that you think women who have sex are sluts, but it is unacceptable to stand on a streetcorner yelling at every woman that passes that she's a slut.

To repeat: I do not care what preference each individual has in the bedroom, and I wish them all luck in finding compatible partner(s).

What I disagree with is that it is acceptable for people to teach these preferences as the truth on a broad scale when that so-called truth results in disrespectful treatment of much of society. That is where we disagree, I think. You are more libertarian, whereas I think bigotry like sexism and racism will never diminish if they are treated as personal preferences. I also believe that they must be eliminated. People must not be treated differently on the basis of factors outside their control such as sex, race and sexual orientation, but on the basis of their public choices and actions. Because there's a double standard on sexual purity, it is not about the action, which is a private action at any rate (in that it affects nobody other than the participants), but about the femaleness of the person being judged.]]> yurble The PatioThu, 14 Apr 2016 08:03:45 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404648#msg-404648 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404648#msg-404648
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StudioFiftyFour
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ladybug2203

If you don't want me due to the fact that I have too much sexual history, that is fine, but don't say untrue garbage that I'm not gf/wife material, I may not be for you but I do make a fiercely loyal partner for the right person. Just cuz I'm not your type doesn't mean I'm incapable of being a good wife/gf to someone else.


I made no claim as to your sexual history, your worthy or unworthiness as a romantic partner, your loyalty or disloyalty, or your ability to serve as a wife to someone else.

I don't care about your sexual history. I am completely indifferent to it. I don't care what "type" you are, or of you are capable or incapable of being a good wife or girlfriend. It makes no difference to me.

And why? Because this is an internet forum, not a singles bar. Hypothetically, even if I was interested in you as a romantic partner, I have no independent access to the information you are providing, anyway.

I am not writing of you, as an individual. I am simply stating the truth---that sex is an open marketplace and people have choices. No one is obligated to have sex with another person, date another person, love another person, etc. etc. etc. And their reasons for engaging OR not engaging in such behaviors are 100% valid, regardless of what they are.


I should clarify when I said "you" I wasn't specifically targeting studiofiftyfour, I meant "you" the audience as a whole. You have to admit the article seems to believe all women should be virginal before marriage if any man will want them, and its such a sweeping generalization.]]> ladybug2203 The PatioThu, 14 Apr 2016 03:42:00 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404644#msg-404644 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404644#msg-404644
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yurble

You have said that women who have lots of sexual partners will have fewer potential marriage partners. I have named two ways in which that could be the case. One, all men prefer women without experience, but some will settle for women with experience. Two, there are men who prefer experience, men who prefer inexperience, and men who are neutral, but far more men prefer inexperience to experience. Which of these is the reason that you think women with lots of sexual partners will have fewer marriage offers, or is there a third reason that I haven't thought of?

Also, why do you think that statement (about fewer marriage offers) is true? Personal observation, rigorous study, or what you were taught?



Some religions preach chastity among women. If you live in an area with a high percentage of men from those religions, you may have fewer marriage partners to choose from.

I don't personally care what people prefer. It make no difference to me.

You want a guy/girl who has had a lot of sexual experience? Fine. A guy/girl with little sexual experience? Fine. You want a partner who is only interested in certain types of sex? Fine. Gay sex? Fine. Threesomes? Fine. Orgies? Fine. You want a partner who has no interest in sex at all? Fine.

As long as these connections are based on mutual consent, what other people do (or DON'T do) makes no difference to me.

The only point which I continue to make is that people are not obligated to have sex with other people, and their reasons for not doing so are immaterial.

Even if you think the girl/guy is a total jerk, being completely unreasonable for not liking you, and having totally unfair and unrealistic standards it does not matter. He or she has absolutely 100% no obligation to engage with you in any romantic way, under any circumstance.

I know, I know... "B-b-b-but StudioFiftyFour... it ain't fair that some guys want virgin brides!" And to that I say, so what? Some women want millionaires. You don't always get what you want. This isn't kindergarden.


I don't care who sleeps with who, who marries who, who dates who, who isn't dating at all... I. do. not. care.

And I find myself scratching my head as to why other people believe that it's their right to basically demand that other people respect them, date them, sleep with them, marry them, etc.]]> StudioFiftyFour The PatioThu, 14 Apr 2016 02:28:36 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404643#msg-404643 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404643#msg-404643
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ladybug2203

If you don't want me due to the fact that I have too much sexual history, that is fine, but don't say untrue garbage that I'm not gf/wife material, I may not be for you but I do make a fiercely loyal partner for the right person. Just cuz I'm not your type doesn't mean I'm incapable of being a good wife/gf to someone else.


I made no claim as to your sexual history, your worthy or unworthiness as a romantic partner, your loyalty or disloyalty, or your ability to serve as a wife to someone else.

I don't care about your sexual history. I am completely indifferent to it. I don't care what "type" you are, or of you are capable or incapable of being a good wife or girlfriend. It makes no difference to me.

And why? Because this is an internet forum, not a singles bar. Hypothetically, even if I was interested in you as a romantic partner, I have no independent access to the information you are providing, anyway.

I am not writing of you, as an individual. I am simply stating the truth---that sex is an open marketplace and people have choices. No one is obligated to have sex with another person, date another person, love another person, etc. etc. etc. And their reasons for engaging OR not engaging in such behaviors are 100% valid, regardless of what they are.]]> StudioFiftyFour The PatioThu, 14 Apr 2016 02:14:18 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404642#msg-404642 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404642#msg-404642
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Peace

I don't see choice when women are forcibly mutilated for male respect. I don't see choice in being forced to wear headscarves and burqua. I don't see choice in honor killings or forced marriages. But that's just me. Maybe you can mansplain this for all the little wimmins here.



You are pointing to an extreme example that is completely off topic. These types of crimes do not happen in the US, because in the US we have choice, and we aren't living under Sharia Law.

No one is forced to do anything, as far as love, sex, marriage, etc. In human trafficking cases where that does happen, criminal charges can come of it.

Consequently, no one is obligated to have sex with you, or me, or anyone else. And we're not obligated to "respect" each other's sexual histories, either, nor are we obligated to disrespect those histories.

The sexual marketplace is a completely free market. As it should be, goddammit.]]> StudioFiftyFour The PatioThu, 14 Apr 2016 02:09:10 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404641#msg-404641 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404641#msg-404641
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happyhiker

I think the offense that is being taken is comparing something like wealth, which is self-evidently a good trait to have in a partner of either gender, with sexual inexperience, which is only seen as a good trait to have in a female partner. Men don't get their bodies mutilated to discourage them from not becoming wealthy, and no man has ever been stoned for being poor. We aren't just talking about the sexual market place, we are talking about a cultural double standard. My mother found out that I had sex with my boyfriend when I was eighteen and she couldn't look at me for weeks and screamed that I was ruined, all the while knowing that my older brother kept condoms in his room. I doubt that many boys my age put up with this kind of shaming for acting on their natural inclinations.

But, as I said, men who value sexual inexperience pretty much get the sex they deserve. I love all the posts on MRA sites about the shitty sex lives these guys have. It's all, "I married a twenty-five-year-old virgin, and I'm so shocked and disappointed that she didn't turn into a freaky slut on our wedding night." I don't blame these men for wanting to marry a virgin, but I think it's hilarious to see them turn around and bitch that they got a frigid religious nut.



I don't care what individual men value or don't value. I don't care what individual women value or don't value.

If you want a man with sexual experience, fine. If you want a woman with sexual experience, fine.

Either way, you aren't owed sex in any circumstance. That's really where I am coming from.]]> StudioFiftyFour The PatioThu, 14 Apr 2016 02:04:35 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404625#msg-404625 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404625#msg-404625
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ladybug2203
While I respect people's right to choose or decline sex partners as they see fit, I can't help but laugh when Madonna/whore complexed men thinks any woman who likes sex couldn't possibly be a good wife, then marries a woman who's missionary only type and only does it to have baybeez, then wonder why their sex life sucks.

And therein lies the heart of the problem: the message is that sex is super-important...so important that you save it for just this one person for the rest of your life...but at the same time, sex is totally unimportant because it's just superficial, animalistic, and base. This type of cultural schizophrenia about sex is one reason why the madonna/whore complex continues. Pick a lane already, fundies.]]> randomcfchick The PatioWed, 13 Apr 2016 16:37:32 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404591#msg-404591 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404591#msg-404591
If you don't want me due to the fact that I have too much sexual history, that is fine, but don't say untrue garbage that I'm not gf/wife material, I may not be for you but I do make a fiercely loyal partner for the right person. Just cuz I'm not your type doesn't mean I'm incapable of being a good wife/gf to someone else.]]> ladybug2203 The PatioTue, 12 Apr 2016 19:32:38 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404494#msg-404494 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404494#msg-404494
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StudioFiftyFour
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yurble
This statement implies that there are men who would put up with women with experience, but most men would prefer a woman without it.

I think it is more likely that there are men who prefer women without experience, men who prefer women with experience, and men who are indifferent. In order for the quoted statement to be true, there would have to be far more men who are in the first category for experienced women to see their marriage opportunities diminished.


I haven't implied anything.

You have said that women who have lots of sexual partners will have fewer potential marriage partners. I have named two ways in which that could be the case. One, all men prefer women without experience, but some will settle for women with experience. Two, there are men who prefer experience, men who prefer inexperience, and men who are neutral, but far more men prefer inexperience to experience. Which of these is the reason that you think women with lots of sexual partners will have fewer marriage offers, or is there a third reason that I haven't thought of?

Also, why do you think that statement (about fewer marriage offers) is true? Personal observation, rigorous study, or what you were taught?]]> yurble The PatioMon, 11 Apr 2016 07:14:59 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404482#msg-404482 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404482#msg-404482
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StudioFiftyFour
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Peace

This BIG TIME^^^

I might also add that taken to the extremes, expecting a virginal partner is why whole cultures practice female genital mutilation including sewing the labia shut, wearing burquas to hide women because it's assumed men can't control their lust, and honor killings of females because they exercised some sort of choice in their lives.

This thread and some comments in it is starting to sound a bit on the MRA side, which is against rule #6.




Uhhh... yeah. Exactly. Choice. Choice in who you want to sleep with. Choice in your sexual partners.

No one is owed anything. Those who believe they are owed respect, owed a date, owed sex... they're going to end up very disappointed. You might be owed an inkling of common courtesy, but that's about it.

I'm not sure why any man, or any woman, would honestly believe that they had some sort of implied right to be liked by a member of the opposite sex.

I don't quite see how your response has anything to do with my statement that you quoted, but whatever.

I don't see choice when women are forcibly mutilated for male respect. I don't see choice in being forced to wear headscarves and burqua. I don't see choice in honor killings or forced marriages. But that's just me. Maybe you can mansplain this for all the little wimmins here.]]> Peace The PatioMon, 11 Apr 2016 02:39:57 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404479#msg-404479 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404479#msg-404479 ladybug2203 The PatioMon, 11 Apr 2016 02:15:03 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404467#msg-404467 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404467#msg-404467
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StudioFiftyFour
Reversing the genders, another example can be made with women who are seeking to marry a wealthy man. There are plenty of men who are decent, kind, attractive, and have all of the attributes that would seemingly make for a good partner. Unfortunately, they don't have a mid-six-figure income. There are women out there who will reject them as a long-term partner. Is that fair to the men? I would argue that while this may be frustrating to men, it is absolutely fair. It's the woman's life, her body, her preference, her decision to make, and no one else's.

I think the offense that is being taken is comparing something like wealth, which is self-evidently a good trait to have in a partner of either gender, with sexual inexperience, which is only seen as a good trait to have in a female partner. Men don't get their bodies mutilated to discourage them from not becoming wealthy, and no man has ever been stoned for being poor. We aren't just talking about the sexual market place, we are talking about a cultural double standard. My mother found out that I had sex with my boyfriend when I was eighteen and she couldn't look at me for weeks and screamed that I was ruined, all the while knowing that my older brother kept condoms in his room. I doubt that many boys my age put up with this kind of shaming for acting on their natural inclinations.

But, as I said, men who value sexual inexperience pretty much get the sex they deserve. I love all the posts on MRA sites about the shitty sex lives these guys have. It's all, "I married a twenty-five-year-old virgin, and I'm so shocked and disappointed that she didn't turn into a freaky slut on our wedding night." I don't blame these men for wanting to marry a virgin, but I think it's hilarious to see them turn around and bitch that they got a frigid religious nut.]]> happyhiker The PatioSun, 10 Apr 2016 23:33:54 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404463#msg-404463 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404463#msg-404463
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yurble

This statement implies that there are men who would put up with women with experience, but most men would prefer a woman without it.

I think it is more likely that there are men who prefer women without experience, men who prefer women with experience, and men who are indifferent. In order for the quoted statement to be true, there would have to be far more men who are in the first category for experienced women to see their marriage opportunities diminished.

I admit it is pure anecdote, but my personal experience doesn't suggest this is the case. In the modern world I certainly hope men who want virgins are in a minority, along with women who look at the size of a man's wallet. It's reasonable that people desire relationships with mutual respect. When someone is "settling" for you, they don't respect you.

Anyhow, what I - and I think most people commenting - object to is not if an individual guy has a preference for a virgin, but people teaching girls that "this is the way it is," as if all men had that preference. It's just not the truth. Like telling them that they have to be mothers, it sets them up for one vision of life which may not be the one which actually suits them. I'm all for people who mutually believe that sex should wait until marriage finding each other, but I'm also all for neither women nor men having to repress their sexuality prior to marriage out of an unjustified fear of ending up alone as a consequence.


I haven't implied anything.


I don't care what people prefer or don't prefer. I don't care what they are willing to settle for or not settle for. I don't care if a person wants to date a man, a woman, a rich man, a poor man, a rich woman, a poor woman, men or women of different races, ages, sizes, shapes. I don't care if they are in a relationship for money, sex, love, companionship, all of the above, none of the above, or some other reason.


Sex is an open and free marketplace, based on mutual consent and individual preference. Individuals may discriminate against others for whatever reason they like.]]> StudioFiftyFour The PatioSun, 10 Apr 2016 22:34:35 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404462#msg-404462 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404462#msg-404462
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Peace

This BIG TIME^^^

I might also add that taken to the extremes, expecting a virginal partner is why whole cultures practice female genital mutilation including sewing the labia shut, wearing burquas to hide women because it's assumed men can't control their lust, and honor killings of females because they exercised some sort of choice in their lives.

This thread and some comments in it is starting to sound a bit on the MRA side, which is against rule #6.




Uhhh... yeah. Exactly. Choice. Choice in who you want to sleep with. Choice in your sexual partners.

No one is owed anything. Those who believe they are owed respect, owed a date, owed sex... they're going to end up very disappointed. You might be owed an inkling of common courtesy, but that's about it.

I'm not sure why any man, or any woman, would honestly believe that they had some sort of implied right to be liked by a member of the opposite sex.]]> StudioFiftyFour The PatioSun, 10 Apr 2016 22:21:49 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404454#msg-404454 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404454#msg-404454
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Peace
I might also add that taken to the extremes, expecting a virginal partner is why whole cultures practice female genital mutilation including sewing the labia shut, wearing burquas to hide women because it's assumed men can't control their lust, and honor killings of females because they exercised some sort of choice in their lives.

A bit less extreme, but still pretty horrible, I read an account by a woman who had received sex "education" which compared people who had had sex to a chewed piece of gum. She was abducted and held for years. Afterwards, she not only had to deal with the trauma of what happened to her, but also her own opinion that she was completely worthless because she'd lost what gave her value. I honestly don't know how anyone can condone teaching young women to feel that they've lost all self-worth when they're raped by a priest, their brother, or that date from the church that their parents approved of.

Consensual sex and non-consensual sex are two different things, of course, but when there's condemnation of consensual sex, victims of non-consensual sex will always be forced to defend themselves on charges that they consented but changed their minds later to avoid censure.

So there are many reasons why I find an institutionalized fixation on virginity disturbing. I do get that people can't always choose their preferences. You might have a woman who runs her own company who is submissive in the bedroom, or a man who supports equality who is impotent unless he believes the woman is a virgin. People are entitled to their preferences and fetishes without having to justify them, but when those fetishes are enshrined in the culture they come to affect a lot more people than those who genuinely have them.

I thought there was a sexual revolution in the 60s...I wonder why this is still a topic, outside of a niche group.]]> yurble The PatioSun, 10 Apr 2016 18:35:29 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404445#msg-404445 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404445#msg-404445
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ladybug2203
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yurble
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StudioFiftyFour
Women who are sexually promiscuous will definitely get men! Their choices of men who wish to marry them may be diminished, but rest assured the number won't be 0.

This statement implies that there are men who would put up with women with experience, but most men would prefer a woman without it.

I think it is more likely that there are men who prefer women without experience, men who prefer women with experience, and men who are indifferent. In order for the quoted statement to be true, there would have to be far more men who are in the first category for experienced women to see their marriage opportunities diminished.

I admit it is pure anecdote, but my personal experience doesn't suggest this is the case. In the modern world I certainly hope men who want virgins are in a minority, along with women who look at the size of a man's wallet. It's reasonable that people desire relationships with mutual respect. When someone is "settling" for you, they don't respect you.

Anyhow, what I - and I think most people commenting - object to is not if an individual guy has a preference for a virgin, but people teaching girls that "this is the way it is," as if all men had that preference. It's just not the truth. Like telling them that they have to be mothers, it sets them up for one vision of life which may not be the one which actually suits them. I'm all for people who mutually believe that sex should wait until marriage finding each other, but I'm also all for neither women nor men having to repress their sexuality prior to marriage out of an unjustified fear of ending up alone as a consequence.



This.

This BIG TIME^^^

I might also add that taken to the extremes, expecting a virginal partner is why whole cultures practice female genital mutilation including sewing the labia shut, wearing burquas to hide women because it's assumed men can't control their lust, and honor killings of females because they exercised some sort of choice in their lives.

This thread and some comments in it is starting to sound a bit on the MRA side, which is against rule #6.]]> Peace The PatioSun, 10 Apr 2016 16:36:37 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404441#msg-404441 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404441#msg-404441
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yurble
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StudioFiftyFour
Women who are sexually promiscuous will definitely get men! Their choices of men who wish to marry them may be diminished, but rest assured the number won't be 0.

This statement implies that there are men who would put up with women with experience, but most men would prefer a woman without it.

I think it is more likely that there are men who prefer women without experience, men who prefer women with experience, and men who are indifferent. In order for the quoted statement to be true, there would have to be far more men who are in the first category for experienced women to see their marriage opportunities diminished.

I admit it is pure anecdote, but my personal experience doesn't suggest this is the case. In the modern world I certainly hope men who want virgins are in a minority, along with women who look at the size of a man's wallet. It's reasonable that people desire relationships with mutual respect. When someone is "settling" for you, they don't respect you.

Anyhow, what I - and I think most people commenting - object to is not if an individual guy has a preference for a virgin, but people teaching girls that "this is the way it is," as if all men had that preference. It's just not the truth. Like telling them that they have to be mothers, it sets them up for one vision of life which may not be the one which actually suits them. I'm all for people who mutually believe that sex should wait until marriage finding each other, but I'm also all for neither women nor men having to repress their sexuality prior to marriage out of an unjustified fear of ending up alone as a consequence.



This.]]> ladybug2203 The PatioSun, 10 Apr 2016 13:55:39 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404440#msg-404440 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404440#msg-404440
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StudioFiftyFour
Women who are sexually promiscuous will definitely get men! Their choices of men who wish to marry them may be diminished, but rest assured the number won't be 0.

This statement implies that there are men who would put up with women with experience, but most men would prefer a woman without it.

I think it is more likely that there are men who prefer women without experience, men who prefer women with experience, and men who are indifferent. In order for the quoted statement to be true, there would have to be far more men who are in the first category for experienced women to see their marriage opportunities diminished.

I admit it is pure anecdote, but my personal experience doesn't suggest this is the case. In the modern world I certainly hope men who want virgins are in a minority, along with women who look at the size of a man's wallet. It's reasonable that people desire relationships with mutual respect. When someone is "settling" for you, they don't respect you.

Anyhow, what I - and I think most people commenting - object to is not if an individual guy has a preference for a virgin, but people teaching girls that "this is the way it is," as if all men had that preference. It's just not the truth. Like telling them that they have to be mothers, it sets them up for one vision of life which may not be the one which actually suits them. I'm all for people who mutually believe that sex should wait until marriage finding each other, but I'm also all for neither women nor men having to repress their sexuality prior to marriage out of an unjustified fear of ending up alone as a consequence.]]> yurble The PatioSun, 10 Apr 2016 12:52:57 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404439#msg-404439 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404439#msg-404439
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ladybug2203


I never said nor meant that they couldn't, I just think its hypocritical to fuck like a rabbit cuz "I'm a man" then expect a virginal wife, I just think they should practice what they preach. I do not believe that anyone "owes" anyone sex or a relationship, but disrespect and hypocrisy bug me. Its not okay for someone to treat me as a second class citizen because I'm a sexual person. Yes they may reject me, no they may not treat me like I'm beneath them. And another thing I don't like about the article is that it tells women who are sexual will never get a man, and that's utterly ridiculous.


Women who are sexually promiscuous will definitely get men! Their choices of men who wish to marry them may be diminished, but rest assured the number won't be 0.

Let me ask: When it comes to the men you are personally speaking of, are they committing acts of physical abuse or harassment against you? If so, then they definitely have stepped over the line and they should be reported to the authorities, and punished as per prescribed law in your jurisdiction. If they are simply saying, "I am not interested in you as a dating/romantic/sexual partner," then that's just being rejected. Their reasoning for rejecting you is irrelevant.

Male and female sexuality are not the same thing, and I don't think it's hypocritical for a person with sexual experience to prefer a virginal partner, or vice versa. It's merely a preference, and both men and women have every right to prefer whatever they want, and for whatever reason(s) they want. Can that be frustrating? Could these preferences hurt other people's feelings? Sure. Clearly it touched a nerve with you, in some way. But again, all people have a right to accept or reject love, romance, and sexual relationships based purely on their own standards. And those standards may be viewed by others as unfair, bigoted, prejudiced, or absurd. But it doesn't matter.

Keep in mind that similar to any other market, the sexual marketplace has a way of correcting itself. Men who demand virginal women, for example, may find that there are very few out there, and that they themselves do not possess the looks, charm, physique, money, charisma, etc., to land one. At that point, they will be required to lower their standard, if they want to secure a wife, girlfriend, or whatever.

Reversing the genders, another example can be made with women who are seeking to marry a wealthy man. There are plenty of men who are decent, kind, attractive, and have all of the attributes that would seemingly make for a good partner. Unfortunately, they don't have a mid-six-figure income. There are women out there who will reject them as a long-term partner. Is that fair to the men? I would argue that while this may be frustrating to men, it is absolutely fair. It's the woman's life, her body, her preference, her decision to make, and no one else's.]]> StudioFiftyFour The PatioSun, 10 Apr 2016 12:15:10 +0000 http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404429#msg-404429 Re: more fundie dribbel: good girls aren't supposed to like nasty filthy dirty sex!http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?7,404309,404429#msg-404429
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StudioFiftyFour
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ladybug2203
If a man has romantic interest in a woman, he will pursue her no matter what. If he has no romantic interest, he may still fuck you but holding out won't make him suddenly romantically interested (not saying a woman has to say yes if she doesn't want to though).



But yeah my dream mayun is totally a sexually repressed mysoginistic fundie that takes advantage of women "cuz they said yes" who expects me to be virginal while "sows his wild oats" before meeting me (whom will probably cheat on me when married cuz u aren't supposed to fuck your virginal wife unless baybey making), fuck that noise!




Both men and women have every right to love, date, and engage in sexual contact with whomever they want, for whatever reasons they want, and under any circumstances that they want. Consequently, both men and women may discriminate against and reject love, dating, and sex from anyone they want, and for any reason.

This means that if a man doesn't want a woman who has slept around, that's fine. If a woman wants a man who has slept around, that's fine too. And vice versa.

No one is owed sex, no one is owed respect for their sexual history. Men can reject you for your sexual history. They have every right to. You have the right to reject them, as well. You can reject them for their sexual history. You can reject them for their religious beliefs. You can reject them for their job (or lack thereof), their attractiveness... or any other reason that you desire.

Love, dating, and sex, is and should be, a completely open and free marketplace based on mutual consent.


I never said nor meant that they couldn't, I just think its hypocritical to fuck like a rabbit cuz "I'm a man" then expect a virginal wife, I just think they should practice what they preach. I do not believe that anyone "owes" anyone sex or a relationship, but disrespect and hypocrisy bug me. Its not okay for someone to treat me as a second class citizen because I'm a sexual person. Yes they may reject me, no they may not treat me like I'm beneath them. And another thing I don't like about the article is that it tells women who are sexual will never get a man, and that's utterly ridiculous.]]> ladybug2203 The PatioSun, 10 Apr 2016 03:14:04 +0000