Some things to tell your doctor who is turning you down for a tubal...
"You do know that if I become pregnant, I will do ANYTHING to get rid of it"
"My husband is in prison for child molestation"
"I killed a kid in Reno...just to watch it die. I'd do it again too."
"If I could, I would punch through my own abdomen, rip out my ovaries, burn them and salt the area so nothing would grow there"
"But you see, I don't want ANY children, so forcing me to have some I'll end up hating and abusing just so I can have a tubal doesn't make much sense, does it?"
"I am a whore. Seriously, people pay to have sex with me. Charles Manson's mother was a whore, and look how he turned out."
"I will make sure any children I do have, make your life a living hell"
"If I really decide I want a kid, I'd like a brown one from another country, if they're good enough for celebreties, they're good enough for me"
"I am so filled with hate for the rest of humanity, I often reach a state not unlike rigor mortis. Hey, you're right, I would make a great mother."