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Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk

Posted by SlumSlut 
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
January 10, 2012
Not sure if it was a baby stalk so much as a siccing of baby ON me.

We apparently got new neighbors. Didn't know this till I took the dog out to potty and saw them (I will also add that I had a bright scarf wrapped all over my lower face because of allergies and it wasn't very chilly outside even. So I looked pretty loony.)

Well they have a fat little...I THINK female loaf and the moo is very visibly infested AGAIN.

Anyway....taking dog out.....dressed like a psychadelic ninja....and yet the vapid moocow tells her daughter "LOOK A DOGGIE!" and sends the little butterball brat waddling at high speed at MY dog. Now he is NOT trained completely yet. Not at all. He's like 8 months and still going through a hyper puppy phase. And for all this bitch knew he bites. (He doesn't but he would have knocked that kid flat and pranced on her......I haven't decidded if I want to prevent his child destroying tendencies or not yet...)

So basically I give the moo the most face melting glare I have and literally run to the other side of the building away from the little terror wobbling towards us.

Yeah pretty sure our neighbors got the hint since now they haven't tried to talk to us XD GOOD. I mean not only did she tell her brat to come touch a strange dog that for all she knows has a habit of ripping baby heads off but its owner is a complete stranger that's dressed like a crazy ninja. Where in the fuck is her survival instinct?
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 13, 2012
My coworker's sister just had another baby, and she was going to try to push the freshly out the vag pictures on me until I put the brakes on it. I told her I really didn't want to see bodily fluids and solids coating a baby. She fortunatly didnt' push it on me. I was so relieved.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 13, 2012
Quote
crazycatlady
My coworker's sister just had another baby, and she was going to try to push the freshly out the vag pictures on me until I put the brakes on it. I told her I really didn't want to see bodily fluids and solids coating a baby. She fortunatly didnt' push it on me. I was so relieved.

What I don't get is how moos aren't embarassed by those types of pictures. I don't want anyone (not even myself) seeing the insides of my uterus/vagina smeared all over a baby, a wad of toilet paper, or anything else. A few of these freshly-shat loaf pictures have popped up on my Facebook feed a few times and it never fails to gross me out.

The only babystalking I've encountered lately is through Facebook. A girl I went to grade school with recently friended me. It's been a couple of months and she has never messaged me to say hello or anything. However, I'm well up-to-date on her IVF escapades (she's only 33) and ultrasound pictures. I'm sure you can all imagine the attention-whoring glory...
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 13, 2012
I agree. One of my best friend's mom passed away a couple years ago and I was helping her sort through a bunch of old pictures she had found in her mother's personal effects. We came across pictures of my friend HALF OUT of her mom's cooch, and we were both horrified! Not only was my friend a cyanotic baby, but her mom's twat was completely exposed and forever burned onto both of our minds. Not how I want to know or remember her mom.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 17, 2012
quills-- what a crazy lady, sending her toddler after a strange dog! I know someone who sometimes puts a muzzle on his totally gentle mastiff in order to avoid such bizarre things. Mars is a sweet soul who wouldn't hurt a fly (unless he accidentally licked it to death with his steak-sized tongue!). But my friend had problems similar to yours. A muzzled mastiff keeps the cooing mommies away.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 17, 2012
Quote
randomcfchick
quills-- what a crazy lady, sending her toddler after a strange dog! I know someone who sometimes puts a muzzle on his totally gentle mastiff in order to avoid such bizarre things. Mars is a sweet soul who wouldn't hurt a fly (unless he accidentally licked it to death with his steak-sized tongue!). But my friend had problems similar to yours. A muzzled mastiff keeps the cooing mommies away.

I wish I could use the muzzle trick. He was actually wearing his "Halti" face lead (puppy is a big boy and I need it to keep him from dragging me places outside if he's having a hyper day) and while it isn't a muzzle it is almost ALWAYS mistaken for one. UNFORTUNATELY he's a lab mix and looks like a sweet golden snuggle butt. Everyone wants to coo and touch him and it pisses me off when adults do it and he gets hyper and is a right ass the rest of our walk but to send your kid over when I have an obviously bouncy dog is just idiotic. Nowadays we pretty much only take walks with my neighbor and her HUGE (I mean I think she's part dinosaur) Rottie mix. No one wants to pet her even though she's calm and a huge sweetheart LOL. People have such stupid stereotypes for dogs.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 18, 2012
Quote
quills


I wish I could use the muzzle trick. He was actually wearing his "Halti" face lead (puppy is a big boy and I need it to keep him from dragging me places outside if he's having a hyper day) and while it isn't a muzzle it is almost ALWAYS mistaken for one. UNFORTUNATELY he's a lab mix and looks like a sweet golden snuggle butt. Everyone wants to coo and touch him and it pisses me off when adults do it and he gets hyper and is a right ass the rest of our walk but to send your kid over when I have an obviously bouncy dog is just idiotic. Nowadays we pretty much only take walks with my neighbor and her HUGE (I mean I think she's part dinosaur) Rottie mix. No one wants to pet her even though she's calm and a huge sweetheart LOL. People have such stupid stereotypes for dogs.

Slightly off topic, but if your dog pulls on walks, you can train him not to do that. Here, this guy is a professional dog trainer and he makes great instructional videos. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NT8VDgR_Koo&feature=relmfu
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 18, 2012
Quote
juliewashere88
Quote
quills


I wish I could use the muzzle trick. He was actually wearing his "Halti" face lead (puppy is a big boy and I need it to keep him from dragging me places outside if he's having a hyper day) and while it isn't a muzzle it is almost ALWAYS mistaken for one. UNFORTUNATELY he's a lab mix and looks like a sweet golden snuggle butt. Everyone wants to coo and touch him and it pisses me off when adults do it and he gets hyper and is a right ass the rest of our walk but to send your kid over when I have an obviously bouncy dog is just idiotic. Nowadays we pretty much only take walks with my neighbor and her HUGE (I mean I think she's part dinosaur) Rottie mix. No one wants to pet her even though she's calm and a huge sweetheart LOL. People have such stupid stereotypes for dogs.

Slightly off topic, but if your dog pulls on walks, you can train him not to do that. Here, this guy is a professional dog trainer and he makes great instructional videos. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NT8VDgR_Koo&feature=relmfu

I will have to check him out. He's gotten a lot better now thankfully. The halti was mostly because I don't have the strength to control him if he gets hyper and he would yank me then. We've been training him to heel though and he is doing SO much freaking better. I am going to check out this video and see if he has any extra tricks we can use effectively grinning smileyD
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 19, 2012
Last night at dinner BF and I were subjected to the toadler standing on the booth seat backwards whilst staring at us as we tried to eat, all the while her parents are oblivious that their little crotch turd is behaving as if the people seated behind them are a zoo exhibit. We tried our best to ignore her -at one point she started hollering "HI! HI! HI!" over and over, about ten times, because we were ignoring her. Finally, I turned around and hissed at her like a feral cat. It didn't seem to faze her, but BF got a good laugh out of it. At any rate, she quit yelling after that, even though the staring went on for most of the meal.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 20, 2012
ugh, the staring! A little girl at an assembly hubby and I were at this weekend was so creepy! She could have been a pretty little african girl, but her mom blow dried her hair out frighteningly straight, and her forehead was very Tyra Banks. She looked like a little withch child. She would sit backwards in her chair and stare with vacant eyes at us for minutes at a time. I told my husband that she scared me. Our friend said he felt like his soul was being sucked away! lol!
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 20, 2012
Quote
gymrat
Last night at dinner BF and I were subjected to the toadler standing on the booth seat backwards whilst staring at us as we tried to eat, all the while her parents are oblivious that their little crotch turd is behaving as if the people seated behind them are a zoo exhibit. We tried our best to ignore her -at one point she started hollering "HI! HI! HI!" over and over, about ten times, because we were ignoring her. Finally, I turned around and hissed at her like a feral cat. It didn't seem to faze her, but BF got a good laugh out of it. At any rate, she quit yelling after that, even though the staring went on for most of the meal.

Carry a small squirt gun with you. Works wonders on kids. Go for the eyes.

"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." - Edmund Burke
I can't stand the staring thing some of them do. I'll usually stare daggers back at them. I'm sure there would be other creative ways to deal with that--maybe start making out with my husband, or start swearing or talking about some colorful things. Now, while the mother still might not care or take notice, at very least, I could have the satisfaction that her precious dumbpling might bring some of those vulgarities back home.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 22, 2012
Quote
gymrat
Last night at dinner BF and I were subjected to the toadler standing on the booth seat backwards whilst staring at us as we tried to eat, all the while her parents are oblivious that their little crotch turd is behaving as if the people seated behind them are a zoo exhibit. We tried our best to ignore her -at one point she started hollering "HI! HI! HI!" over and over, about ten times, because we were ignoring her. Finally, I turned around and hissed at her like a feral cat. It didn't seem to faze her, but BF got a good laugh out of it. At any rate, she quit yelling after that, even though the staring went on for most of the meal.

I've actually gotten good results by making eye contact with the clueless kid, letting all warmth drain from my expression, and slowly shaking my head 'no'. It's not so much a dirty look as radiating dominance, I've been told by those who've watched me do this. It works well on kids who are self-stalking me.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 23, 2012
So I just got on the bus to find FOUR LOAVES. Two of the moos, of course, are taking up handicapped seats with strollers. Lucky me, the only available seat is behind another one. Kid says "No!" when I go to sit. Person behind me is amused. I'm sitting, and it's still staring at me and trying to reach for my coffee. Another loaf is just staring...and drooling. Oh, apparently all the moos know each other - they were all sharing one cellphone to carry on the same conversation. Reaching across the aisle and very loud. And they are all getting off at the same stop. Weird.

----------
michaela

"A child will make two dishes at an entertainment for friends, and when the family dines alone, the fore or hind quarter will make a reasonable dish, and seasoned with a little pepper or salt, will be very good boiled on the fourth day, especially in winter." -Jonathan Swift, A Modest Proposal
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 23, 2012
Quote
michaela
So I just got on the bus to find FOUR LOAVES. Two of the moos, of course, are taking up handicapped seats with strollers. Lucky me, the only available seat is behind another one. Kid says "No!" when I go to sit. Person behind me is amused. I'm sitting, and it's still staring at me and trying to reach for my coffee. Another loaf is just staring...and drooling. Oh, apparently all the moos know each other - they were all sharing one cellphone to carry on the same conversation. Reaching across the aisle and very loud. And they are all getting off at the same stop. Weird.

Oh god, sorry to hear! I've experienced that on busses more times than I can count. Breeders just love piling onto busses and acting like they own them.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 23, 2012
Dammit, it's happening again - on the bus going home, and this one's just cackling...

Edit: AND NOW SOME DUDE IS ENCOURAGING IT. Time to put on some Queen; if Roger Taylor screaming in my ears can't drown it out, then nothing can.

'Nother edit: people are still enabling, and now oblivimoo is off the phone and allowing the kid to stick its fingers in her mouth. Happy lunch hour, everyone!

----------
michaela

"A child will make two dishes at an entertainment for friends, and when the family dines alone, the fore or hind quarter will make a reasonable dish, and seasoned with a little pepper or salt, will be very good boiled on the fourth day, especially in winter." -Jonathan Swift, A Modest Proposal
Be sure to scream if it touches you.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 24, 2012
when i ate out with my bf last night, there was an unattended brat dancing around to the music, staring at me through my dinner, hoping i would pay attention to her.
what made me pity her was, before trying to catch my attention, she actually did the attention whoring to her own desperate looking mother who sat in the corner, smoking with a man (whom i'm sure wasn't the girl's dad). her mom pretty much ignored her, didn't even look at her, at all. it was as if the girl didn't exist..so the girl turned to me, who pretty much ignored her too as her mom did.
kinda sad if you think.

spread meme, not genes

to my uterus: Y U NO GET THE FUCK OUT FROM MY BODY?
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 25, 2012
I had a baby-stalking incident with a surprisingly happy outcome.

Hubby and I went out to eat early in evening. Now the area we were in doesn't exactly have the most extensive restaurant selection so we ended up at Olive Garden (also I have a terrible weakness for salad.) Well we were sat at a table beside a half-wall with bars along the top. On the other side were two women and their kids....the woman nearest us had a girl about .....3? Hell if I know. Of course the little monkey-child starts staring at us. I tell the husband "Don't look at it. If you don't look it might go away." to which he responded "At least there's bars between us.....it's sort of like the zoo."

I guess the mother heard us because she snorted, grabbed the child and told her "NO ONE wants you staring at them while they eat. You are going to put people off their food. Sit down."

I was pleasantly surprised. Not often do you run into a stalking baby with an actual parent instead of a breeder. I got to cram salad in my face in peace big grin with biting lipDDD (I srsly love salad.)
Yay! I hope you gave the mother a big thankyou grin for that. Sigh I wish more of them understood how offputting it is - even my dogs are trained to ignore people who are eating as the begging, staring dog is high on my list of unacceptable behaviour.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 26, 2012
Lol I gave her one of those slow approving nods and a big grin.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 26, 2012
saw this today. long image but worth looking at. if you're babystalked and violated in rude way, that could be your chance to use this prank!


Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
February 26, 2012
Quote
quills
I had a baby-stalking incident with a surprisingly happy outcome.

Hubby and I went out to eat early in evening. Now the area we were in doesn't exactly have the most extensive restaurant selection so we ended up at Olive Garden (also I have a terrible weakness for salad.) Well we were sat at a table beside a half-wall with bars along the top. On the other side were two women and their kids....the woman nearest us had a girl about .....3? Hell if I know. Of course the little monkey-child starts staring at us. I tell the husband "Don't look at it. If you don't look it might go away." to which he responded "At least there's bars between us.....it's sort of like the zoo."

I guess the mother heard us because she snorted, grabbed the child and told her "NO ONE wants you staring at them while they eat. You are going to put people off their food. Sit down."

I was pleasantly surprised. Not often do you run into a stalking baby with an actual parent instead of a breeder. I got to cram salad in my face in peace big grin with biting lipDDD (I srsly love salad.)

Haha, awesome.

I experiened a babystalking episode like that once, but after the moo told the brat to quit staring, it just kept gawking at us.
I would love to anytime these brats come around me to tell the stupid mother that Im on the sex offenders list and that she should get brat away from me (not true...but funny)
I don't know if this counts as babystalking because it was very brief. Last time I was at the grocery store I was in the same general area as a woman with a baby for a couple minutes. She was silent until I passed close by her on my way out of the area. Then she decided to coo at the baby. I ignored her and continued walking away. This is not the first time someone started cooing at their baby when they noticed I was there. Why on earth do they think I will be impressed?
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