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Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk

Posted by SlumSlut 
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
May 17, 2014
She's probably on some moomie board right now crying about how that lady was sooooo mean...
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
May 17, 2014
In my experience, breeders are the main offenders for cluelessly blocking aisles, right-of-way, exits, doors, etc.

Almost universally, they get offended if you dare to ask them to move on so that people can actually use the passageway, door, etc.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
May 18, 2014
Last night I went to a book launch party celebrating friend's first novel. Arrived a few minutes after the launch started, and another couple with their toadler was there. As people arrived they wanted to fuss over toadler and give moo lots of udder rubs, everyone except me. You can guess what happened next, I was standing near the potato chips, moo decided toadler deserved a special treat of potato chips. I was tempted to hit the bar and see if moo decided toadler should have a jack and coke. Guess it rubbed moo the wrong way that I was the only person who didn't acknowledge her toadler.

Bright side was when toadler got fussy friend strongly suggested that they leave. Just chaps my ass that some idiot breeder tries to upstage someone's major accomplishment. Hope they don't get an invitation for the second novel's launch.

On a happier note before the book launch party, I was at home depot looking for painting supplies. Saw a non assistance dog in one of the aisles. Chatted with the dogs mom and petted the dog. Derpy toadler comes running into the aisle, moo ambles into aisle. Everyone's attention is on the dog and ignoring the toadler. Moo leaves in huff. Takeo finds what he's looking for and I say goodbye to dog and her mom.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
June 04, 2014
I will be riding Amtrak's Cardinal train form New York to Indianpolis at the end of June. It's a 22-hour ride and I'll be riding in coach with my ladyfriend. It will be an even loooooooooonger ride if there are any screaming babies near us on the train (perhaps those who got displaced from airplanes?) Anyone here ever ride the scenic Cardinal through VA and WV?
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
June 24, 2014
Until I saw the term on here it didn't occur to me that this incident was an episode of "babystalking," but now I suspect it might have been. (Regardless, it was unpleasant.)

I work at a large discount retailer. A couple weeks ago I was working the sales floor in the women's department and a Moo came over, with her (I'm guessing male) babby in the shopping cart (I never know how old the things are; this one was old enough to sit up by itself but I'm guessing under a year old). Almost immediately the Snotling starts making this ungodly irritating, high-pitched noise…louder than a whine, but not quite loud enough to qualify as a scream. It repeats the noise every several seconds and Moo continues to browse and pushes the cart right past me several times. If she wanted me to smile or comment how "cute" her sprog was, she would have been disappointed. After several agonizing minutes I get called up to the register and of course Moo and Snotling were still there when I returned to my department.

The bastard was probably whining because it missed its nap because Moomy took it shopping. I wish these selfish parents would remove their brats from the situation as soon as they start whining/crying/screaming or doing anything else to make it miserable for everyone else. But noooo, the world revolves around them and their spawn and everyone else just doesn't understand how haaaard it is. :drool
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
June 25, 2014
Or.. they expect the employees and other shoppers to coo at the damn thing while they continue to shop as in 'using the village to babbysit' :kydangry flipping off
First post here! Hope this counts as a babystalk

I remember eating at a restaurant with my family, an uncle that we rarely see was visiting for a few days so we decided to all go out for food.

While we were eating our food this brat comes out from nowhere and starts touching me on the arm! I don't have a great level of tolerance for annoying children, and while it was bugging me I seriously got thoughts of grabbing this little turd's arm and twisting their arm or possibly digging my nails in.

They did not speak a word to me, no they just randomly rocked up to our table and decided my arm is grab central.
Its moo did not even apologise to me!

Usually I am one of the mellowest people around but if your brat is bothering me......:flaming
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 06, 2014
Just got bratstalked by my H's BIL last night. These two trailer twunts decided to bring their 9- and 13-year old to a BAR. The famblee all went out and instead of taking their bored, tired kyds back to the hotel and tucking them in, BIL and SIL decided to sit the spawn right next to me at the fucking bar while I'm trying to enjoy my SoCo and Coke, he picks up the 9 year old who is shoving her knee into my thigh, and proceeds to expound on how she's his "best friend" ever in the whole world. I give a fuck why? By all means, continue to talk while I diagnose you. It took every ounce of effort I had directed to my internal brain-mouth filter not to tell him that she'll be spinning around a pole at the gentleman's club and hoovering coke off the dicks of married Republicans in a few years.

He had been being a totally obnoxious, loudmouthed boor the entire night, interrupting my attempts at getting to know one of my H's cousins' husband, a very smart man from France. BIL was being pushy, intrusive, and intense and it was ruining what little buzz I had and I told him so, which was basically me filtering my overwhelming desire to tell him to fuck off.

Fast forward to the bar where he's mugging with his feral 9 year old and saying "WE JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU! WHY YOU GOTTA HATE ALL THE TIME!" They just want to love me, huh. A person they don't know from Adam and know absolutely nothing about, and couldn't care less if they did. Here is a worthless duh with two exhausted and bored spawn, overly concerned about what the childfree catlady thinks of them, AT A BAR AT 9 PM ON A SATURDAY. By all means, you dumb fucking selfish fuck, don't take your kids home and tuck them in to bed where they fucking belong. Worry about what a complete stranger thinks of you at a bar at 9pm on a Saturday, oh, and your comment about shoving me into a corner and making out with me about prompted a reversal of fortune for my dinner. Classless Homer Simpson-looking thoughtless piece of shit.

I've been babystalked a number of times, including recently at Ulta by a stupid bitch who had a screeching loaf in an SUV stroller, sing-songing to it "What is that nice lady doing? Say hi to the nice lady!" Such behavior should be treated with utter indifference. But I have never been kydstalked by one older than 2 and never directly in my face while I was trying to get my damn drink on. I imagine most pahrunts know that their kyds aren't cute anymore past the age of 2 and stop trying to get the childfree cat ladies to affirm the the shitshow that is their lives. But not this douche.

Fucking awful night. Gawd I wish they would just leave me the fuck alone!
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 06, 2014
I got babystalked at a fucking head shop. A whole fucking famblee walked in while l was figuring out which eliquid I wanted. The had a freshly shat loaf in a stroller and parked it right next to me while they were looking at bongs at the other side of the store. They obviously assumed that I thought the loaf was cute for some reason and were cooing at it and waving at it from across the store.

Well, guess they never met someone with an rda, a form of ecig that produces an absurd amount of vapor, because they started giving me nasty lookes when I managed to get the store looking like the inside of a steam room. They ran out of there real fast...
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 09, 2014
Got babystalked at the dentist this afternoon. I'm a huge coward and my anxiety levels are always high, no matter what it is I need to have done. The office is on its own in a quiet location and caters to cowards. The waiting room is usually very peaceful and quiet, except for today. When I pulled into the parking lot I could hear a toadler wailing and I was like "No fucking way!". I didn't sleep well at all last night and I was pretty anxious about the appointment so I was already cranky as hell.

The mom was out in the parking lot with the shrieking toadler. I ignored them, went into the office, and took a seat in the waiting room. There were only two other people waiting. A minute later they come inside and the toadler decides to stand and stare at me. She started shrieking again. I didn't look up to make eye contact and I could see the mom standing there waiting for me to acknowledge her preshus, but that moment never came. I stared off into space as if they weren't there. A few minutes later (I assume it was) the duh came out. He stood in line to pay his bill and the moo and kid turn to go outside. The toadler turns and says "Bye bye! Bye Bye!" to me and I totally ignored her. I did actually feel like a raging cunt for that, but I just wasn't in the mood for babystalking today, or any day really. I really wanted the few minutes of waiting time to myself so I could try and not feel so anxious.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 10, 2014
Don't feel bad about not saying 'bye bye' to the little crotch nugget. I never pay attention to that crap. That constant 'hi' bye' stuff rakes my last nerve.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 10, 2014
The other two people in the waiting room were male, so I was the obvious target for babystalking because you know all women instinctively love babbies and toadlers. smile rolling left righteyes2
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 15, 2014
This isn't mine, but I like to read Not Always Right and the like at work to pass time when I don't have a lot to do. Anyway, I recently came across this gem and I could feel my blood pressure rising just reading it.

From: http://notalwaysfriendly.com/not-hi-in-the-air/35120

Quote
Airplane Moo
(My husband and I, and our two-year old daughter, are on a plane that stops in Portland. We stay on the plane, as almost everyone else gets off, walking past us since we’re in the front. As they go past, my daughter smiles and says ‘bye’ to every single person. Almost without exception, they at least say ‘bye’ back to her. In middle of this, the following occurssmiling smiley

Daughter: “Bye!”

Lady: *looks away, no response*

Daughter: “Bye, lady!”

(She is still looking away, turns her shoulder, and sighs. She’s clearly heard Daughter. She’s just not responding.)

Daughter: “Mommy! That lady didn’t say bye! Why didn’t she say bye? I said bye! Why won’t she say bye?”

Me: “Maybe she’s having a bad day, honey. Maybe she’s just not in the mood to say bye right now. She might be tired.”

(Meanwhile, there’s been a slowdown at the front of the plane. Everyone is standing still and the lady is trapped right next to us. Everyone around us is now glaring at the lady. Daughter turns to the next person.)

Daughter: “Bye!”

Next Person: “Bye! You are adorable, and SOME people are just rude!”

Lady: *stiffens, tosses head, glares at us, looks away, and stomps down the aisle away from us*

Daughter: “I did not like that lady. Bye!”

Everyone Around: “Bye!”

(She said ‘bye’ to every single person that got off, and then ‘Hi’ to every single person who got on. All of them answered her.)"

This crap just makes me so mad. Of course the exhausted woman on the plane is the bad guy for not wanting to talk to your fuck trophy. I give the moo a little credit for admitting the woman was tired (probably had some little shit kicking the back of her seat the whole flight), but she should have told her little vermin to STFU and stop babbling to everyone trying to leave. What pisses me off the most is how apparently we're supposed to believe the whole plane took the little shit's side and villified the woman for not saying anything. That is :BS.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 15, 2014
I would have totally been that lady who wouldn't acknowledge widdle pweshus. Man, if that story is true, it just highlights everything I can't stand about our chyuld-worshipping society-- Everyone around us is now glaring at the lady. Then the next bitch makes a big point of showing up the lady, by going overboard in kissing up to the brat with YOU are adorable, and SOME people are just RUDE. Then widdle pweshus, learning self-righteousness at an early age, proclaims with feigned innocence I didn't wike dat wady. And the whole planeload of a-holes treats the lady like a forum flouncer with a condescending, smug "Bye!"

Hello, out there. No one has any obligation to acknowledge your DNA replicant. That does not make us big mean meanies. It does say quite a bit about YOU, however, and thanks for teaching your kyds to be just as entitled and righteous as you are.

The story is just a bit too neatly wrapped up, complete with all pax on the plane totally defending the brat...yeah, smells like a steaming pile. But the motivation behind the story...what prompted someone to write a story that makes the chyuld look like an innocent widdle sweetums who everyone should wuv, and if you ignore the chyuld, here's your lesson, that society will shun you. ? Someone's awfully butthurt and stewing.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 16, 2014
That story is the reason I'm convinced I must have headphones at all times. ALL. TIMES. I don't know how I'll manage dealing with overly social nosy assholes like that. It's a fucking commercial plane not a goddamned church ice cream social happy hour. People have shit going on and not everyone is social or likes fucking kids. smiling smiley I will continue to ignore old creeps and annoying children alike (not a huge difference...) thank you very much. I'm a MEAN, BAD person.

benevolent Anti-natalist, pro-abortion, pro-smut, anti-sleeze, eat the rich, fuck childbirth. pro-black, lgbtqia? Cool. *thumbs up*
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 16, 2014
Quote
dood
This isn't mine, but I like to read Not Always Right and the like at work to pass time when I don't have a lot to do. Anyway, I recently came across this gem and I could feel my blood pressure rising just reading it.

From: http://notalwaysfriendly.com/not-hi-in-the-air/35120

Quote
Airplane Moo
(My husband and I, and our two-year old daughter, are on a plane that stops in Portland. We stay on the plane, as almost everyone else gets off, walking past us since we’re in the front. As they go past, my daughter smiles and says ‘bye’ to every single person. Almost without exception, they at least say ‘bye’ back to her. In middle of this, the following occurssmiling smiley

Daughter: “Bye!”

Lady: *looks away, no response*

Daughter: “Bye, lady!”

(She is still looking away, turns her shoulder, and sighs. She’s clearly heard Daughter. She’s just not responding.)

Daughter: “Mommy! That lady didn’t say bye! Why didn’t she say bye? I said bye! Why won’t she say bye?”

Me: “Maybe she’s having a bad day, honey. Maybe she’s just not in the mood to say bye right now. She might be tired.”

(Meanwhile, there’s been a slowdown at the front of the plane. Everyone is standing still and the lady is trapped right next to us. Everyone around us is now glaring at the lady. Daughter turns to the next person.)

Daughter: “Bye!”

Next Person: “Bye! You are adorable, and SOME people are just rude!”

Lady: *stiffens, tosses head, glares at us, looks away, and stomps down the aisle away from us*

Daughter: “I did not like that lady. Bye!”

Everyone Around: “Bye!”

(She said ‘bye’ to every single person that got off, and then ‘Hi’ to every single person who got on. All of them answered her.)"

This crap just makes me so mad. Of course the exhausted woman on the plane is the bad guy for not wanting to talk to your fuck trophy. I give the moo a little credit for admitting the woman was tired (probably had some little shit kicking the back of her seat the whole flight), but she should have told her little vermin to STFU and stop babbling to everyone trying to leave. What pisses me off the most is how apparently we're supposed to believe the whole plane took the little shit's side and villified the woman for not saying anything. That is :BS.

She wouldn't dare, her little czneauxphglayke is the perfect bait to reel in tons of narcissistic supply!
I was at the pharmacy a couple of weeks ago. While waiting for my scrip, I placed a call to my credit card company to fix some fuckery. Meanwhile, the whole time, there's a fucking feral toadler down the aisle, screaming it's fucking head off... not because it's upset, no! But because it was so thrilled with life! So thrilled, in fact, that it had to scream CONSTANTLY! Like a fucking railroad spike being driven into my head, with each successive joyous squeal (which sounded exactly the same as bloody fucking murder). Its moo was doing nothing to shut it the fuck up. It was pulling jars of vitamins off the shelves and throwing them on the floor. She did nothing about it. It threw a ball down the aisle, and when it hit my foot, I became pissed off and kicked the shit out of it. Well, apparently, that was an invitation for it to keep going. It also had a really long plastic sword, and as moo was strolling past me (mind you, I'm visibly on the phone and pissed, not looking at anything but the ceiling), the kid fucking jabbed me TWICE (obv didn't hurt, but I kicked the fucking sword away both times, and moo was just like "lol isn't it so fucking cute," as I rolled my eyes and gave them a fucking go-to-hell look.

Why in the hell do these people breed? Seriously?
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 17, 2014
Quote
fade_to_pale
Why in the hell do these people breed? Seriously?

They have nothing better to do.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 17, 2014
It rarely happens, but I've been babystalked possibly twice already just today.
First I was in my car waiting for the ferry, this moo starts walking up the row stooped way over, going slow, obviously walking a larva that is just figuring out feet and legs. She was doing that wide legged walk, making sure not to step on it while she held its hands.
As she came up the row she turned her head to grin into each car she passed. Ugh.
I whipped out my nail polish and hoped a fresh coat would waft chemicals her way and scare her off for da safety of da childwens. She had a fully ambulatory babbler as well.
They paused right by me because I was the last in the row and slowly and carefully turned around with much "the baby" this, and "woopsy!" that.
I didn't look up.

Then once we were boarded, restless tourists got out of their car behind me and were peering through the railings. Moo and boy child, not even a toadler anymore, more like what they call tweens, I think.
Then they just ambled up alongside my car and suddenly the boy starts screeching in my ear about a "harpoon", right outside my window! I have a scarf I always put up when the sun is on my side, but all the windows are down because it's warm.
So I jab at my curtain and flip it up enough that the kid can see I'm sitting right there.
He scurried away immediately to his moo at least, but then I hear him complaining to moo that "Well their windows were down!". Whatever.
I'm surfing on my phone here, so I arrange my hands so that my middle fingers are the only ones sticking out with the rest of my fingers curled. I do the passive aggressive flip off a lot. You have to look directly at me to see I'm doing it, I don't wave it around, it's just my way of signalling nosy Nellies are unwelcome.
(It wasn't a harpoon either, just a long pole with a loop on the end. Boathook maybe?)

Yeah, I think the second incident was just annoying child rather than babystalking, but now it's all written out I'm leaving it.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 17, 2014
Quote
Presto
(It wasn't a harpoon either, just a long pole with a loop on the end. Boathook maybe?)

A boathook is kinda like a pool cue with a gentle hook at the end.
I think you were looking at a 'docking pole'.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 18, 2014
Quote
dood
From: http://notalwaysfriendly.com/not-hi-in-the-air/35120

I sincerely hope that story is fake, because it is disgusting. What if the woman just found out she had cancer, or had lost her job, or was on her way to a loved one's funeral, or just had a really bloody splitting migraine? Entitled, self-centered and no empathy whatsoever - way to teach your brat, Moo. THEY (and the bullying mob) were the rude ones. angry smiley
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 24, 2014
The other day I was toadler-stalked, or more specifically, stalked by the toadler itself. I was at an outlet mall (specifically, at Hanes looking at bras) and there was a male toadler in the store with its Duh (who looked about 70, but the toadler kept calling him Daddy so it must have been its duh). Toadler and Duh were running around playing hide and seek in the store while Moo was in the fitting room. (Ugh, why can't all parents teach their kyds that stores are for shopping, not for playing?) The toadler kept shrieking in its shrill, annoying voice, and trying to talk to the cashiers who were trying to be polite but you could tell they weren't really interested.

At one point the toadler found the Duh, who went to go hide again, and Snotley came up to me and starting shrieking things like "MY DADDY'S HIDING. STAY RIGHT HERE. HE'S HIDING. THEN WE GO FIND HIM. OK?" I paid him absolutely no attention so I have no idea why he thought I was part of the "game" but I guess that's part of the fun of children. smile rolling left righteyes2 I didn't look at the kyd once and didn't say anything, but it JUST KEPT TALKING. This went on for a few minutes with no effort by Duh (or Moo, who could surely hear her kyd's hollering because we were right next to the fitting room, where she was) to tell him not to bother strangers while they're just minding their own business. Oh, and after Moo came out of the fitting room, she and Duh were talking about where they were going for dinner and asking Snotley what he was hungry for. Snotley kept saying, "I'M NOT HUNGRY. WE'RE STILL PLAYING. WE'RE NOT HAVING DINNER, WE'RE STAYING HERE," shit like that. And the parents just let him get away with bossing them around. the world 'fail' on flames I spend a decent amount of time looking, and finally just left because I couldn't stand to hear that shrill little voice for another second. The famblee was still there. Those poor employees.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
July 24, 2014
heck.. I would have left the miniute that shit started... and I would have told the cashiers on the way out just WHY I was leaving.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
August 03, 2014
I got babystalked a few days ago... by the loaf, not its breeder. I went for a morning run and stopped by a pharmacy to get a protein bar. The pharmacy shares its entrance with a clinic. I got my protein bar and sat on the bench inside the building where the entrance separates. Out of the clinic came an inbred-looking loaf, aged about 3-5, with a rash around its mouth (it looked like an allergic reaction and I HOPE that's what it was, it doesn't seem to be anything contagious that I know of) and stood right next to the bench, staring right at my face and grinning at me. His moo kept muttering "Come on, let's go" or something half-assed like that, but Shitford kept saying "No", grinning at me and trying to establish eye contact. Nope.
After he finally realized that I didn't feel like acknowledging the pweshus widdle cyootness that he was, he stormed out. Moo then went back inside the clinic (what?). When I went out, I saw him pestering another woman outside.

I don't have low self-esteem. That's a mistake. I have low esteem for everyone else.
-Daria
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
August 03, 2014
Staring at your face while you were eating? Sounds like dog behaviour to me.
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