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Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk

Posted by SlumSlut 
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
August 03, 2014
I wasn't even eating yet, otherwise I'd have assumed it was the protein bar he was after. No, it was just plain ol' attention seeking.

I don't have low self-esteem. That's a mistake. I have low esteem for everyone else.
-Daria
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
August 03, 2014
Maybe he just knew you had it....saw you buy it... and knew you had 'candy' Kids are weird.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
August 14, 2014
Walked to the library earlier today and about a block away when I walked past a moo with a loaf in a massive stroller even my massive SMooV stroller standards. Moo looked at me and looked at loaf then at me. I walked past them without acknowledging moo or loaf. Moo cleared her throat loudly and I kept walking.

When I got out of the library moo wasn't there so I'm guessing she tried a better babystalking spot.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
August 17, 2014
My husband and I frequently (in good weather) take our 2 parrots out to walk or eat on a porch of a restaurant. They are always in flight suits on leashes. It's good for the birds to have new environments and experiences. (especially for one of them who needs to get over some trauma) We try to pick the most out-of-the-way spot to avoid smokers (I have MCS and it's really bad for the birds as well.) and we don't call attention to ourselves, but we get reverse bird-stalked all the time. Usually with adults it's ok. We verify they don't have any nicotine residue on them (birds can get that on them can cause skin irritation) and let them hold our friendly bird for a few minutes, no drama. Even young teens are ok.

But the kids. Oh geez. Breeders will come up and ask if their kids can "look" at the birds. I always say "As long as they look with their eyes and not their hands." because 9 times out of 10 the snotty beasts want to grab the birds, which would then take one of their wee fingers off in fright of being suddenly grabbed and crushed.

Of course, that's not enough for them. Oh no. They want a photo! WHAT??? We're not a side-show attraction! Hello? The worst one, my husband took me out to the park (a dog park for upper class singles area) for a picnic with the birds, alone in a shaded area away from everyone. Some moo plops her non-walking-in-diapers loaf on our blanket and whips out a camera. Wha????? Since when do you ruin someone else's picnic by taking photos of your spawn on our blanket?

These are not even large parrots. These are very small parrots (a conure and a caique). Not that if we had a pair of macaws that would be an excuse, but we're pretty clearly not a major spectacle or photo op. My family picnic is not an opportunity for your shitling to have its photo taken. She didn't even ask either. She just pulled it out of the stroller and plopped it on the blanket. DaFu? As if we were there expressly for her photo session? Excuse me but are we being paid for this? No? Then get your loaf out of our picnic.

DH humored the moo, but I was livid and walked away with one of the birds (who hates strangers) so she wouldn't have to deal with the situation and only returned with entitlemoo was gone.

So I'm not sure if it's just reverse bird-stalk (which is fine for the adults who just love birds, and even the respectful teens) but the whole baby photo op feels like a baby stalk to me, either to have US entertain the spawn or using us to get attention from everyone who sees the pweshus baybee wif a birdee.

What really annoys me is that as little as these brats are, they could easily loose a digit when a moo shoves them at our startled birds, and then we would be blamed for the damage.
So... today I was fetus-stalked by someone I'm guessing was my age (25) but aged into the look of her early 50s by methamphetamine, enormously inpig with her gunt and inflated belly on top of being roughly 300 pounds, belly hanging out of a too-small Gold's Gym T-shirt, following me around (I did not look kid-friendly at all), pointing to and rubbing her gross piggy abs, smelling like loaf shit and puke, who was in a thrift store at the same time as me, with 2 toddlers following along. Good news is I got a gorgeous vintage (60s or 70s?) wood-rim car steering wheel I'm gonna use in a project someday, and a pretty nice mini dream catcher. Loaflette and the two shitlets never touched them thankfully.

Second store, I was toddler-stalked in, one of the sleaziest places in town, deli and checkout counters are surrounded by chain-link fencing material, barely updated since the 70s, drug addicts, alcoholics, sex offenders and recidivist felons are much of what can be found around my area, and the "Pantry Market" (name changed to protect the innocent owner & staff), toddler was eating a nearly 2-foot-long blue freezie and showing it to me, with the Hi! Hi! Hi! bullshite and the toddler was asked to leave with its zookeeper after doing the same to the whole store.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
August 19, 2014
They asked them to leave? Excellent! That never happens where I am. I wish they would ask stalkers to leave.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
August 30, 2014
Mr Pug gets babystalked smiling smiley



_______________________________________________
“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.”
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
August 30, 2014
Quote
thom_c
Mr Pug gets babystalked smiling smiley


Last night, I had that same expression and behaviour while visiting with a group that included three boisterous male children.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
August 31, 2014
At least the 'baby' in that video is just as precious as the 'stalkee' Priceless expression. Can just hear the pup say "What the heck? Who brought this bratt to the party?"
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
August 31, 2014
That kitten is welcome to babystalk me anytime.

I don't have low self-esteem. That's a mistake. I have low esteem for everyone else.
-Daria
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
September 02, 2014
At work, I'm usually pretty tolerant of the sprog factor. Most of the MTs that work at this spa have kyds, so I get the constant spawn chat. I'm really uncomfortable with them leaving their unattended kyds in the break room while they work... I mean if you trust them in our break room, why can't you trust them at home alone? Seriously. I'm not your kyd's free baby sitting service here. I can even tolerate that one of the MTs likes to go on and on about the evils of abortion and how "Most ab0rti0ns are out of convenience." *eyeroll* I do have my limits, however, and today I've reached them.

This particular MT has been guilty of all of the above mentioned items on my nuisance list... including bringing a sick spawnling in, leaving it there all day to fart and cough and lounge across half the floor of the tiny break room and use the employee bathroom, leaving the door wide open with clients and employees alike getting a good view. *shudder* She also does the forced phone photos, where she shoves pics of her kyds up under your nose and exclaims how beautiful you're supposed to think they are. She also goes on and on about drug addicts, criminals in jail and such "fambily members" so I get she doesn't really understand civility on a lot of levels. I get that.

Today, she brings one in, after she's already left work for the day, to pick up her check. (Why didn't she get it during work?) Instead of just getting the check and going, she parades the kyd up and down the hall and pushes it behind the check-in desk to hug on the receptionist (who cooed at it). I did my best to ignore it.

She finally leaves, goes to the store and then returns again with the sprog for...??? I have no idea. Seriously. I have no idea why she had to come back in, with groceries, leave the sprog in our waiting room while she went to the back again and do whatever she's doing. Meanwhile the sprog starts the "HI" thing. Oh geez. There is nothing I loathe more than the "HI" thing. I refuse to look at it. The receptionist makes nice with it, but the owner, had to shut his door to concentrate and keep the noise down. The thing goes on and on about its day and its activities. I had to just leave.

Ok, I get that it's slow. I get that the receptionist likes your kyd, but WTF? It's bad enough to leave your sprogs unattended in the break room, making me uncomfortable at work, but to leave one in the waiting room? What if a customer was here? If I was a customer I would be really unnerved by that. It's a spa, not a day care. At least try to be discrete. Especially if it's a little stalker like this one, with the "HI" thing. Just irks me.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
September 06, 2014
Not sure if this counts as a baby-stalk but here goes...

I have a friend who is huge into babies. She has pictures of friend's and family's babies on her phone as wallpaper. She sometimes shows me the baby picture in the background, even though she knows I'm not interested in children. Was I babystalked?
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
September 06, 2014
Quote
keeper of traken
Not sure if this counts as a baby-stalk but here goes...

I have a friend who is huge into babies. She has pictures of friend's and family's babies on her phone as wallpaper. She sometimes shows me the baby picture in the background, even though she knows I'm not interested in children. Was I babystalked?

You're hanging out with someone who is going to wind up on newspaper headlines for cutting a fetus out of another woman so that she can raise it. That seems like a seriously unhealthy level of obsession with other people's infants.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
September 06, 2014
Quote
yurble
Quote
keeper of traken
Not sure if this counts as a baby-stalk but here goes...

I have a friend who is huge into babies. She has pictures of friend's and family's babies on her phone as wallpaper. She sometimes shows me the baby picture in the background, even though she knows I'm not interested in children. Was I babystalked?

You're hanging out with someone who is going to wind up on newspaper headlines for cutting a fetus out of another woman so that she can raise it. That seems like a seriously unhealthy level of obsession with other people's infants.


That IS rather creepy....
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
September 06, 2014
Quote
keeper of traken
Not sure if this counts as a baby-stalk but here goes...

I have a friend who is huge into babies. She has pictures of friend's and family's babies on her phone as wallpaper. She sometimes shows me the baby picture in the background, even though she knows I'm not interested in children. Was I babystalked?

Wait, she's your friend? Why? Bitch sounds like she's out of her mind.

--------------



"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who haven't got it."
George Bernard Shaw

"An oyster can play catch if u only give it the oprotunity"
Some random YouTube commenter

"hate comments will be deleted!! fuckers!"
Some random YouTube uploader

Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
September 07, 2014
My friend and I get along fine in lots of other ways. She does it to give me a hard time. She says she likes other peoples kids for the Kodak moments, when they start acting up, she can hand them back to the parents.

It's also a boundaries issue, assuming that EVERYONE around you wants to see baby pictures and not asking whether one is interested in the first place. smile rolling left righteyes2
Anonymous User
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
September 09, 2014
One of my worse toadler-stalk stories was when I was at the DMV. Of course, the 2+ hour wait time to renew your license is bad enough without somebody bringing their shitletts; but this Moo just had to make matters worse. Why she couldn't leave the kid home with a babysitter, I'll never know. Anyway, Bratleigh was understandably bored with waiting demanded to "color". Moo hadn't brought anything to occupy her, so eventually went to the back counter and took a STACK of the DMV change-of-address forms and a couple of the provided pens and Bratleigh went to work on her "art". I wondered how much of our tax dollars and license fees get wasted on those forms so the kiddies can "color" on them. Once she'd filled both sides of every page with her beautiful drawings, she decided to proudly show off her glorious artwork to everyone else in the waiting area. Bratleigh waddled from person to person with her pictures "Lookie what I drew, Lookie, Lookie!" Several other people felt obligated to smile politely and comment "Oh that's lovely Honey, look how talented you are!" Of course that's exactly the kind of attention Bratleigh wanted. As she moved down the line of people (which stretched out the door and down the sidewalk by this time) I wondered if it ever occurred to Moo that one of these already annoyed and impatient people might not like being shouted at by her crotch-fruit. Then I wondered if Moo realized how easily Bragleigh could have been kidnapped - or at least tripped over by one of a hundred or more people in the waiting area. When the kid got to me, I ignored her. And, of course, Moo was disgusted and annoyed that I wouldn't acknowledge her pweshus little artist and why I didn't just gush over the gloriousness of her accomplishment.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
September 15, 2014
I think I was babystalked today. I was leaving the main building I work in to go to a meeting, and there was a dad with two toddlers in the lobby. There were about twenty other people in the lobby at the time, all men, and none of them obviously leaving. I was on my way out, heading for the doors, and the dad made a beeline for me and tried to intercept me. He wanted me to take their picture. I told him I didn't have time, without slowing down or stopping. He had a stunned look on his face as I left.

Yes, it's definitely a coincidence that this guy went after the only woman in sight. smile rolling left righteyes2
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
September 17, 2014
Quote
cassia
Quote
thom_c
Mr Pug gets babystalked smiling smiley


Last night, I had that same expression and behaviour while visiting with a group that included three boisterous male children.

ugh that sounded like Easter at my husband's nieces place with her partners adults sort of teenage boys.. it was so nice to come home to a quiet house with three sleeping cats after spending the entire day worrying about my dental work due to teenage boys and their boisterous antics.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
September 25, 2014
I don't understand why they have to yell?? Today I was on the train home - it was late (which means fuck yes chipotle) and I was with a friend mostly tuning out and looking out the window and fucking grateful the clueless loud awestricken-that-they-are-on-a-real-subway sunday rider types weren't on this train back... Some guy gets on and keeps yelling about how "you have to sit down honey because the train is moving, daddy can stand". "Noooo, you have to sit, daddy can stand. Sit down" Behind us. On an otherwise empty car. THERE WERE TWO FUCKING SEATS?! WHY did you HAVE to sit RIGHT BEHIND the two 'nice ladies' and start YELLING FORWARD ABOUT A NON-SITUATION? SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN NEXT TO IT. CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR VENTRILOQUIST PROP?!

I fucking hate ostentatious people, but once they get a goddamned kid prop to employ into their attention seeking games its 10x more annoying.

:s thought id be happy to rant but I guess I'm pissy, sick, and hanging onto my patience for peoples' stupid antics poorly.

benevolent Anti-natalist, pro-abortion, pro-smut, anti-sleeze, eat the rich, fuck childbirth. pro-black, lgbtqia? Cool. *thumbs up*
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
September 28, 2014
Yesterday Takeo and I went to a local book festival to see friends and promote a convention we staff. We were socializing when a woman approached us and introduced herself. She's a convention runner that recently moved to the area, and is looking to work on conventions again after a break from having a kyd. We talk for a bit and she excuses herself.

We run into an author friend who writes erotica about panel topics for next year. Conrunner woman shows up again with her brat and plunks it down next to me, because as the only female I'm supposed to go batshit over the brat. We chat a bit with the moo, and she gives me her card. It describes her as "Emily's moo" and gives an email and phone number. Her actual name isn't on the card at all.

The card is at the bottom of my bag. I'll see it next time I clear it out my bag wonder for a split second who the hell is Emily's moo, and why I have her card then toss the card in the recycle bin.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
October 03, 2014
An acquaintance of mine actually had BUSINESS cards where she identified herself as

Tyler's Mom

her name was underneath in small type


What a loser. She might as well type up business cards that read:

Tyler's Mom

I'm going to ditch work for the day the minute my kid has a minor issue
and I'll expect the childless/childfree/empty nester to cover my ass and be happy about it
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
October 25, 2014
I just got baby stalked in Peet's. I'm screwing around on my iPad, siphoning their free wifi before my shift starts at my store which is next door.

Kid climbed up onto the empty chair, moo stood about 5 feet away, obviously waiting for me to interact with her about 2y/o brat. When she didn't get the desired "awwwwww, hi there!!!!! Aren't you cute?!" and the "you're such a good moo!" smile, she told her kid to "come on, she's working".

Haha. Take that moo.:biggrin2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What is a home without children? Quiet. ~Henny Youngman

I don't want people who want to dance, I want people who have to dance. ~George Balanchine

"I took the batteries out of my biological clock and put them in my vibrator"
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
October 25, 2014
Not precisely babystalking, but still relevant

Walking through the local grocery store, Moo had parked her cart right in front of the apple display. Cue both shitlets reaching for every item they could. One was seated in the little part of the cart by the handles, the other was hanging off the front. They pick up caramel apple packages and generally handle with their gross hands that have been everywhere things that people are going to eat. I try and walk past and they reach out for me, too. Two pairs of waving, grasping, germy hands. They were both boys, and you know those are allowed to be more gross and pick their nose and their ass and stuff.

Ugh. >.< I cannot stand when people touch things they are not planning to purchase, food in particular. It's just unsanitary.
Re: Babystalk, babystalk, it's a wonder you can walk
October 28, 2014
I was toadlerstalked on the bus home from work today. He-brat fixated on me because of my bright coloured hair, and was asking how I got it that colour and did I paint it. Moo was yapping on her phone while her toadler wandered around climbing all over the seats chatting to random passengers and asking annoying questions, and her other kid (probably about 18 months) was sitting on the floor of the bus in the middle of the aisle where people have to walk to get off. Moo didn't do a thing other than tell Toadleigh to "shut up and sit yer arse down" a couple of times.

Although the kyd was annoying, I kind of felt sorry for him, because it was obvious Moo wasn't bothered in the slightest, when she wasn't yapping on the phone she had headphones in. Passengers on public transport are not your free fucking babysitters!
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