| The "I got bingo-ed" threadPosted by juliewashere88
A) we just bought the house of our dreams and yes the bingos started right away, even by those who know better. I like to start the "tour" with how impractical the house would be for breeders, so that's why we got it at a bargain price (true) and it is perfect for us. B) we sold our old house to a lady with two children who, when we called her to answer some questions about the home, assumed we had kids. Lady: " so how did your kids feel about XYZ?" Me: *crickets*... "Um... we do not have children but my neighbor said XYZ about their family and they seem quite happy" I was shocked that simply because of our age and marital status someone assumed we had kids. This IS the west coast after all!
1. I was chatting with my mom, and I happened to tell her about one of my female acquaintance who got accepted to medical school. her response was, "nah, I pity med school girls" I asked, "why?" and answered, "because you know... one must stay in school many years to be a doctor. poor girls. shouldn't have to stay in school that long (so she can marry and breed in her 20s)" Bingo! 2. I have various childish toys, including a radio controlled car. one day, when I was trying to fix the toy car, my dad commented, "great, my future grandkid can play with that toy!" I didn't answer, I just look at my dad with weird puzzled horrified expression of hell-no! 3. I was arguing with my parents over how unnecessarily overprotective they were. then they said, "you won't understand, you will understand when you have your own kids!" I snapped and told them that the only type of kids I will have is feline kids. cats. kitties. furbabies. effective to stop the arguement.
felisdomestica: I have various childish toys, including a radio controlled car. one day, when I was trying to fix the toy car, my dad commented, "great, my future grandkid can play with that toy!" I didn't answer, I just look at my dad with weird puzzled horrified expression of hell-no! I'm sure your furbabies would have a blast chasing around a radio-controlled car! ![]()
My cat loves hubby's remote control monster truck. It is bigger than her, but she puffs up and growls at it, bats at it and chases it.
Same dude who insisted on predicting that I'd be pregnant within a year got told, "Your obsession with my reproductive status is unhealthy. And I'll have a kid when you go get a sex change... because, you know... you might change your mind about being a dude, one day." Him: "Not gonna happen." Me: "Exactly."
I've gotten the following: "You'll change your mind one day. So-and-so used to say she never wanted kids, now she has one." Whatever you say, clueless relative. You'll be the first one I call when I'm sterilized. "You never know. You might meet a man and fall in love." Yeah, and he'll be childfree too. I will not even consider a relationship with a wannabreed. "But you'd make a good mother." How did you come to this conclusion? Is it because you saw how well I did with the Real Care Baby? First off, I was being marked for that. Second, every time the thing cried my cat tried to attack me. "You'll lose the weight after the baby is born." (response to my disgust about pregnancy weight gain) Perhaps, but I'll never lose the cavernous twat after Cuntley drops out of it. And given some of the nasty stories I've read on here about moos and their foul-smelling twats, ugh! That's all for now. I predict more bingoes in the future.
CAT didn't like loaf, either! SMART CAT!I'm SO glad we didn't have those HORRID things ( Real Care Baby- or ROBOBABY) when I was in school! ![]()
I think my mother anti-bingoed me today. We were talking about how unfit some of my relatives are to breed, and she said, "At least you know what you'd be getting into and will actively avoid it. You know you have no maternal instinct and are unlikely to develop any. These poor fools think they could do it." ---------- michaela "A child will make two dishes at an entertainment for friends, and when the family dines alone, the fore or hind quarter will make a reasonable dish, and seasoned with a little pepper or salt, will be very good boiled on the fourth day, especially in winter." -Jonathan Swift, A Modest Proposal
I rarely get bingo-ed lately. Most people I run into either know I have had a tubal or know I dabble in being a complete cunt (or a combination of the two) and thus do not bother me anymore. Seems someone didn't get the memo. We go to what we call our local "Nerd Shop" right off base most weekends. My husband goes off and plays a few rounds of Warhammer 40K and I work on my own 40k army getting it painted. We've been going there a while now and most people I routinely talk to have already figured out early on I cannot stand babies/children/spawn and never even asked the dreaded questions. But not this one bozo. First off the guy is a fucking spaz. I think he's like 20 and suffering from either ADHD or was a crack baby or...who knows. The guys reminds me of the squirrel from over the hedge only not cute and fuzzy. I've run into him several times and every time I have wanted to slap his hyperactive head off. Well last weekend we were there, I was hanging out with an old dude that paints exclusively and we were trading tips when spazzo plops his happy ass down at the painting table. Starts fiddling with his models so I think "oh he's just going to leave us alone...ok that's cool..whew" go back to talking to Kenny. We share a common twisted humor so I end up showing him the "NAPTIME!" video. We're laughing and I'm sure I've made a few crude baby-hater jokes. Well little did I realize but spaz-ma-taz was listening. Who would have though he had the concentration skills to listen to anything? Starts questioning me "You don't like kids? Why not? What will you do when you have kids if you hate them?" on and on and on till I finally stopped facepalming long enough to cut him off with "I'm never having kids. Not only have I had a tubal I support abortion. Infact I encourage it." got up and left before I strangled him and upset the owner. Went and hugged the hubby where he was playing his game and calmed down. Ended up watching his game for a while. Well here comes the freaking spazoid again. Sticks his phone in my face. He has a picture displayed of a cat and a baby on their backs on a bed. Looks at me and says "BUT LOOK WHAT YOU'RE MISSING." I could FEEL my eye starting to twitch. I put on a fake sweet smile and said "We already have cats." "NOOOO SILLY. THE BABY!" Oh yeah definite eye twitch. I summon up every OUNCE of self control and with the most dead pan expression I can manage say "To miss something you have to actually want it in the first place." turned and walked over to my husband who kept the guy the fuck away from me the rest of the night. He thankfully didn't bother me the next night either......probably due to Kenny tell him to leave me alone. I think the main thing about that encounter was thanks to this forum I was able to come up with an almost elegant comeback as opposed to my normal vulgar ones. I still prefer the vulgar way but it's so nice to have an alternate option there. Also I suck at typing out a series of events lol. Writing is one art I am not skilled at.
" What will you do when you have kids if you hate them?" " DUR! question fail. apparently it's never occured to Spazmo D'Tard that PEOPLE DON'T HAVE TO HAVE KYDS, IT IS OPTIONAL. "THE BABY!" Yup, that's a baby. IT'S AS UGLY AS THE REST OF EM. Like you don't know what babiez look like! like the pic of that PARTICULAR albino LOAF will change your mind. what a dickcheese!
My responses are as follows: And your point is? Feel free to share. That isn't enough to make me want one. I was a sperm once too but you don't see me wanting to cuddle up to a fucking wankstain, do you? That last one is someone's sig line. It was one of the first things on this board that gave me a laugh. I've often said it to people in public.
say "No I wasn't. I WAS CLONED". They will be confused into silence! ![]() "I was a sperm once too but you don't see me wanting to cuddle up to a fucking wankstain, do you? That last one is someone's sig line" It's also a quote from John Constantine: Hellblazer. (DC comics character). "Shark, you never cease to make me laugh" ![]() Sorry, only registered users may post in this forum. |