Philosophy cosmetics "baby grace" drivel

Guilty pleasure: Pre-holidays I watch the QVC shopping channel as entertainment; love to see their tactics in hawking the giftware. It's usually on as background and the other night I snapped to attention as the host was reading the following text off a bottle of Philosophy brand body lotion. Took me a while to find it on the Internet. You should've seen host and vendors cooing over the notion; can you all imagine the odds of Philosophy ever coming out with a "ChildFree Grace" collection and what the slogans might be?

Here's the "Baby Grace" text on the lotion bottle. (It's for adults, it just for some bizarre reason appears to be themed 'baby.')

have a baby if you've ever wondered what your soul looks like. have a baby if you dare to feel the winds of heaven each time you feel their breath across your cheek. have a baby if you have it all, and it's still not enough. have a baby if you have found your purpose, but your purpose hasn't really found you. have a baby if you ever wondered what "mother nature" really means. have a baby if you need proof that God truly does exist . . .

I am very disappointed because I love Philosopy and give their bath products as gifts all the time. I may even have to write a letter....

What does Baby Grace smell like, a fetid diaper and the stench of despair?

I know. And the giggling, cooing and validating going on at QVC while the host was dramatically reading the text had me springing for the remote. Almost whipped off an irate e-mail to QVC but was busy.

Notice how it all can be summed up as "have a baby to fill a void in your life if you are too intellectually lazy to find some meaning in your existence on your own. instead, inflict that role on an innocent creature that will sap more of the world's resources and probably turn out as vapid as you are."

Yuck. Melding pronatalism, infantilism, and vague spiritualism.

I like Philosophy products, too. It used to be all about making yourself smell fresh like one of those mythical fresh-smelling babies people keep talking about but I have yet to encounter. Their ads were supposed to inspire youthfulness in one's self. Now it sounds like they're marketing hopelessness: "Don't bother doing something nice for yourself, just live vicariously through someone else."

You know what it comes down to? "Well, I've failed in my mission to make a difference or create meaning. Better shit out someody else to do it instead."

This is disappointing to me too. I won't be giving up my Cinnamon Buns over it, but I do feel like writing a letter.

I'm picturing a scent consisting of a dirty diaper, spit-up, milk breath (ew - hate milk) and pureed vegetables in a jar.

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Melanie
Guilty pleasure: Pre-holidays I watch the QVC shopping channel as entertainment; love to see their tactics in hawking the giftware. It's usually on as background and the other night I snapped to attention as the host was reading the following text off a bottle of Philosophy brand body lotion. Took me a while to find it on the Internet. You should've seen host and vendors cooing over the notion; can you all imagine the odds of Philosophy ever coming out with a "ChildFree Grace" collection and what the slogans might be?

Here's the "Baby Grace" text on the lotion bottle. (It's for adults, it just for some bizarre reason appears to be themed 'baby.')

have a baby if you've ever wondered what your soul looks like. have a baby if you dare to feel the winds of heaven each time you feel their breath across your cheek. have a baby if you have it all, and it's still not enough. have a baby if you have found your purpose, but your purpose hasn't really found you. have a baby if you ever wondered what "mother nature" really means. have a baby if you need proof that God truly does exist . . .

White gloopy stuff that gets you pregnant?

That's a really bad connection to make, surely?

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thursdaynext

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Melanie
Guilty pleasure: Pre-holidays I watch the QVC shopping channel as entertainment; love to see their tactics in hawking the giftware. It's usually on as background and the other night I snapped to attention as the host was reading the following text off a bottle of Philosophy brand body lotion. Took me a while to find it on the Internet. You should've seen host and vendors cooing over the notion; can you all imagine the odds of Philosophy ever coming out with a "ChildFree Grace" collection and what the slogans might be?

Here's the "Baby Grace" text on the lotion bottle. (It's for adults, it just for some bizarre reason appears to be themed 'baby.')

have a baby if you've ever wondered what your soul looks like. have a baby if you dare to feel the winds of heaven each time you feel their breath across your cheek. have a baby if you have it all, and it's still not enough. have a baby if you have found your purpose, but your purpose hasn't really found you. have a baby if you ever wondered what "mother nature" really means. have a baby if you need proof that God truly does exist . . .

White gloopy stuff that gets you pregnant?

That's a really bad connection to make, surely?

larious

I am sending two letters to voice my dissatisfaction:
____________________________________________

Here's the draft of my childfree letter:

I have been a user of philosophy products for about 5 years, and enjoy their pure fragrances as well as your company's simple, life-affirming "philosophy" But the promotional copy for your newerst fragrance, "Baby Grace" is unsettling.You appear to be advocating pregnancy as a cure for all ills, and in these days of teen births and rampant unsafe sex, it comes across as irresponsible. When you talk of "..hav(ing) it all, and it's still not enough", and "f(inding) your purpose", I wonder if you realize that the 1950's are over and women can find fulfillment without being chained to the house with children underfoot.

In short, I am disappointed that a seemingly-progressive company chooses to identify so strongly with a woman's traditional gender role of childbearer, first and foremost. The truth is, If I was a stay-at-home mom and didn't have a job, I couldn't afford to buy your products in the first place.

_________________________________________

And here's my letter from a "hurt woman who is desperately trying to conceive":

I lvoe Philosphy soaps but I am very upset at your newest scent baby Grace. I am trying to conceive with my husband and seeing a reminder of babies is very hurtful at this time. I started crying right at Macy's whne I read winds of heaven, baby breath (when all I wanted was refill of Cinnamon Buns). Then they had to escort me to the bathroom, and there was mothers lounge and then I started crying even harder because other women were breastfeeding. You should be more considerate of mothers going through IVF it is the most painful time of my life not having a baby to hold, when everybody is holding a baby and nobody pays attention to me.
_____________________________________________

I will let you guess which letter will be taken more seriously.

Miss H, I can see both these letters being taken seriously by a marketing professional. Because, in a sense, both groups are insulted by this ad campaign. Have a baby to cure all that ails ya? Some want one and can't, some don't want one.

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From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
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I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

navi8orgirl, I work in marketing and have read dozens of cranky letters. The truth is, they will likely write off the childfree letter as the "angry rant of a 40-year old feminist with 10 cats and chin hair" and embrace the hurt peewins of a mommy-wannabe, because mothers are holy and noble and all that candyfloss.

But I'd love to be proven wrong, if enough CF people voice their opinions!

Miss H, great letters and yeah, we certainly do know which one will be paid more attention.

______________

- The human gene pool could use a little chlorine

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navi8orgirl
Miss H, I can see both these letters being taken seriously by a marketing professional. Because, in a sense, both groups are insulted by this ad campaign. Have a baby to cure all that ails ya? Some want one and can't, some don't want one.

I agree, both are valid.

---

lab mom

Miss H, you may have a point. I think both groups are insulted by this campaign, but hurt peewins go a lot further than "My soul does not look like a purple squalling thing that reeks of sour milk and shit, thankyouverymuch." And I only have four cats and no chin hair in sight.

And I am blogging this one, as I thoroughly enjoy featuring "marketing gone awry." (and added that line above to my rant.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

I don't know the product, so I don't feel like I can write a letter of complaint. But I sure hope everyone who previously bought from this company will write in.

I hope they don't use human placenta in their products....

Psht, philosophy products are shite anyway and insanely overpriced. I can find products that are light years better and cost a fraction of the price of philosophy stuff. And I think their "philosophy" blurbs on their products are an insult to the word "philosophy."