Another new book on childfreedom (fencesitter -> CF)

Although it is called Motherhood, it isn't about being a mother. It's about a fence-sitter coming down on the side of being childfree.

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Her book is something I urgently needed to read, a novel drawn from life and a kind of fictionalized diary that allows Heti to interrogate the question, ‘Should I become a mother?’

Her answer is ‘no,’ she will not. Or given that Heti inverts the question, seeing it as a positive choice: ‘yes,’ she will remain childfree. Although the book doesn’t use this term, freedom is an idea to which it keeps returning.

I am not sure I will like the book, since being a fencesitter never resonated with me. But I guess it is good to know more stuff is being published?

The title seems a bit off. Perhaps by approaching the topic as a fencesitter she will attract more readers.

Fencesitting never resonated with me either but I did question my choice quite a bit as I hit 23 and knew people who were having kids. Figured it couldn't hurt but the more critical thinking I applied the more determined I became to live a child free life. I couldn't think of a single reason why I would want kids. And I'm still waiting to hear a good reason why someone decided to have kids. I enjoy questioning choices though, think it is a good philosophy to question everything and weigh the question from other perspectives. It was a huge mistake on my part to think other people enjoy questioning and rethinking choices and viewpoints, they often do not. I think of live more as a continual learning process and no matter what we have knowledge of there is always so much more to learn.

There is a link to videos of people talking about why they don't want kids:https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Why+I+Don%2527t+want+kids

Fencesitting has never been my problem, either. What bugs the everloving shit out of me are the CF apologists out there. "Oooohhhh...I love children, but I don't think they're right for me." WTF is wrong with disliking them? I know it's a topic that's been touched on quite a bit on here, but it really grinds my gears that so many CF people are AFRAID to upset pahrunts, and choose to placate them...lest the mobs come after them.

Frankly, I don't like kids. They are noisy, smelly, rude, destructive...I could go on. CF apologists make me feel like they're one step away from not being so CF after all. Most of the CF people I know IRL, tell me the same thing I already know. Kids are NOT what they're cracked up to be. When I read that syrupy-sweet crap that come out of some CFers mouths, all I can think of is, "You're one broken condom away from being a moo."

Sorry about the off-topic rant, I just had to say something about it. I've been going through some CF sites, and the fucking pandering to breeders actually kind of embarrasses me.

Just to keep it on topic, I don't think I'd buy this book. The very fact that she's called it "Motherhood" makes me cringe, almost like she wants to make it a huge seller by attracting moos using the title. Obviously, there are waaayyy more moos than there are non-moos, so I guess this makes sense.

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mumofsixbirds
Fencesitting has never been my problem, either. What bugs the everloving shit out of me are the CF apologists out there. "Oooohhhh...I love children, but I don't think they're right for me." WTF is wrong with disliking them? I know it's a topic that's been touched on quite a bit on here, but it really grinds my gears that so many CF people are AFRAID to upset pahrunts, and choose to placate them...lest the mobs come after them.

I think it's possible to be CF and like kids, especially if you're CF for environmental or medical reasons (although I do wonder why those who luuurve kids don't just become adoptive parents). Liking kids is neither forbidden nor obligatory.

I understand there's a stereotype that CF people hate kids and some feel it doesn't represent them, and want to make it clear...I just wish they'd do it without throwing those of us who do dislike children under the bus. It seems like many of them want to align with breeders in welcoming their own mistreatment - they've completely internalized the discrimination to the point that they seem to act like they were put on earth to serve parents.

Yeah, I think that's what pisses me off. The way soooo many CF people online bleat on about how they aren't "One of thoooossse childfree people!" Ugh. There is nothing wrong with disliking kids. I have yet to find a reason why to like them. There's nothing good about them. Even when they're being sweet, it's just to manipulate into getting their way - I'm fully aware that if kids didn't behave sweetly sometimes, their parents would PNA them a lot more often.

Even when I was a kid, I saw through those manipulative little bastards who got their way, because they would say something like "I love you, Mommy" or some such shit, and they would get the result they wanted. In the schoolyard, it was a totally different thing. It was Lord of the Flies over there.

Even my parrot manipulates me with that one. He'll say, "I love you Mommy" when he wants to get out of his cage. If I ignore him, he starts freaking out.

Why don't I like kids? Let me count the fucking ways...

Why don't I like breeders? Because they're dicks. They would like for ALL of us CF people to STFU and go away. Commit suicide. This is why I don't understand these idiot CF Apologists who come out and talk about how much they love breeders and brats.

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mumofsixbirds
Even my parrot manipulates me with that one. He'll say, "I love you Mommy" when he wants to get out of his cage. If I ignore him, he starts freaking out.

In the case of your bird, I'm willing to grant him incomplete understanding of English and assume he's saying, "My dear madam, I would like to stretch my wings. Would you be so kind as to open the cage door on my behalf?"

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yurble

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mumofsixbirds
Even my parrot manipulates me with that one. He'll say, "I love you Mommy" when he wants to get out of his cage. If I ignore him, he starts freaking out.

In the case of your bird, I'm willing to grant him incomplete understanding of English and assume he's saying, "My dear madam, I would like to stretch my wings. Would you be so kind as to open the cage door on my behalf?"

He does have a little bell in his cage that he'll sometimes ring when he wants Maid Service, lol.