Self-congratulatory tripe on NAR

As someone that has worked a lot in restaurants and retail, I usually love Not Always Right. I take comfort in knowing I was not alone in being mistreated by customers, and it fosters the same sense of camaraderie I got when my coworkers and I would go get drinks and destress, though to a lesser extent. Today though, this bit of tripe was on the front page.

notalwaysright.com/those-who-fling-themselves-will-sting-themselves/149757/

The story started out believably enough, OP is standing in line and a moo won’t control her beast.

“mother with a young girl storms in, slams down a prescription, and shouts at the employee, “And don’t take f****** forever!” Her daughter begins running around the store, picking up items and dropping them, screeching, and being annoying. Then, she spots the pushchair“

Then, allegedly, the beast wants to hold OP’s loaf, which I find extremely unlikely. Maybe it’s just the small sample size of kids I’ve known {I hate kids, so I’ve avoided them as much as I could}, but in my experience kids don’t care about other kids, especially not babies. Heck, most ADULTS don’t even care about other people’s kids, they just coo over them so they can start a conversation about their own kids. ‘Haha isn’t he cute? Reminds me of my own son that blah blah blah.’

“Girl: “I want the baby, now!”

Me: “No, no picking up or playing with baby today.”

(The girl goes to grab my daughter and I move the pushchair out of reach.)”

To quote James Vietch, “I find that unlikely.”

“little girl then proceeds to fling herself at my daughter, but as I once again move the pram, she ends up face-planting into a basket of body wash. Cue screaming, crying, and a full-blown tantrum.)”

To quote James Vietch again, “equally unlikely.” I doubt very much that the beast threw itself at the pram with enough force that she A. Couldn’t react quickly enough when it was moved out of her path and B. “Face planted” into the display behind it. If anything, I suspect she might have just bumped it. Moo freaks out, threatening to sue OP and bash her head in. Also unlikely, but I’ll give partial credit for realism, because moos are insane. Then, allegedly, OP replies back in a “furious mum voice,”


Me: *in my quiet, furious Mum Voice* “You might actually want to check on your daughter, though by the amount of noise she’s making I don’t think she’s dying. I’d like to see you try and sue. I asked you twice to control your daughter; if you’d actually been watching her this wouldn’t have happened. Now, get out of my face before I move you myself. Besides, I’m sure the CCTV of you threatening me would look lovely on Facebook.”

BULL. That’s a fucking mouthy reply to be able to remember that much ad verbatim. Using a “furious mum voice,” to try to intimidate an adult is laughably pathetic. The use of the abbreviation CCTV seems fake to me also. Don’t 90% of people just say “cameras?” I work in a job that involves monitoring CCTV, and even my coworkers and I just call them “cameras,” when we talk about them. We only say CCTV in emails or help desk tickets. It just seems suspiciously unnatural to me, like the skit on TBBT where they talk about “the internal combustion engine” of a car, instead of just calling it an engine. It’s not factually wrong, just artificial sounding. Additionally, I doubt VERY MUCH the store would release CCTV footage to the woman. Even if it did, what does she think will happen by posting it to facebook? Is she going to tag the woman? Does she know her name? Are they friends? Even if she did post it to Facebook, without any personally identifying information, it’s unlikely the woman or her friends would see it. To illustrate the point, think of it like this. I want one of you to find a photo of my first boss’ car, so I know what model it was. What’s their name? You don’t get to know. Where did they work? You don’t get to know. What color was the car, and was it a car / SUV / van / or pickup? Not telling you that either. It would basically be impossible. A photo or video on the internet with no identifying information is basically a useless bit of data. People in OP’s friends list might see it, but it will be hard to search for by anyone else. And with the MILLIONS of people on Facebook, it’s unlikely this one piece of data will reach moo of beast. The cherry on the cake is the employee congratulating OP, and OP praising her moo bear claws.

Cashier: “I guess this one’s on me, then. Thank you; that woman has been a nightmare for years, and no one’s stood up to her before.”

Me: *laughs* “If it hadn’t been for my daughter, I probably wouldn’t have, either. You know what they say about mother bears and their cubs!”

BULL. If you have to point out that you’re a moo bear and resort to that old cliche, chances are you were far less confrontational and brave than you think you are. It comes across the the same way it would if someone with an urkle-esque physique bragged about bench pressing 400 lbs.

/rantover

Lock him up or put him down.
Stolen from Shiny.