Alana the Joyful Fellater tries to oops a wallet

Quote
myrna minkoff
jesus christ, does NO ONE use birth control anymore?

:bedmadelie

Only the people in this forum

My god...think of all the venereal diseases these bitches must carry....for spreading 'em for whatever dude's cock gets hard while they're in the general vicinity.

No protection = preggo + HIV, Hepatitis, Syphilis, Gonnorhea, Chlamydia....and the list goes on and on and on....

Nastayyy!

Quote
mumofsixbirds
My god...think of all the venereal diseases these bitches must carry....for spreading 'em for whatever dude's cock gets hard while they're in the general vicinity.

No protection = preggo + HIV, Hepatitis, Syphilis, Gonnorhea, Chlamydia....and the list goes on and on and on....

Nastayyy!

Likely causes of Awwtizm.

Just disgusted, and the kid is the one who will suffer. I felt literally sick listening to her babble.

Quote
thom_c
Birth of a Candy Bar
One Payday, Mr. Goodbar wanted a Bit-O-Honey, so he took his old lady, Mrs. Hershey on the corner of 5th Avenue & Clark. He began to feel her Mounds and to him that was an Almond Joy, which made his Tootsie Roll! Then, he let out some Snickers and slipped his Butterfinger up her Kit-Kat, which of course caused a Milky-Way! She screamed " O-Henry! ", and she squeezed his Peter Paul , & said, "your better than the 3 Muskateers! " She soon became a bit Chunky & 9 months later gave birth to Baby Ruth.

Now she can sit on her Cow Tail and collect 100 Grand each month! Hopefully Mr. Goodbar will learn to keep his Whatchamacallit safely behind his Squirrel Nut Zipper.

Almond Joy is just a Zagnut looking for a Goober to be her Sugar Daddy.

Quote
Miss_Hannigan
Skank has a 2-month fling with a divorced dad and whoops...now she's pregnant. The father wants nothing to do with the kid, so she decides to publicly shame him on her blog:

http://alanajoy.tumblr.com/post/18786431058/an-open-letter-to-the-father-of-my-baby

It also breaks my heart that you’re taking from this baby, OUR baby, an entire family. A set of grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins… a brother. Half or not, a sibling for each of them. Building that wall doesn’t make these people any less family. It just makes you the man who prevented the connection. What example do you think you are setting for your son? He’s of an age where he’s looking to you to learn to be a man. Is this the man you will raise him to be? If he has unprotected sex and gets a girl pregnant will you suport him in fleeing from his responsibility? Is this the role model you really are? Apparently.

There's like 20 more paragraphs of crazy. Enjoyl

i love the title of this thread. i laughed when i read this. here's the thing-you fuck trash, you are gonna get oopsed. if you get oopsed, unless she is being deceptive and lying about birth control or stabbing condms with needles, then it is on you. how do i know she's trash-she's going online with this shit. if i were the dude, get a paternity test asap before some breeder pleaser judge hits you with child support. it's easy and cheaper in the long run to pay for a test than it is to try to get out of child support once it is installed and then you find out the woman lied. if she denies the child support, fight for a court order to force her to get one. if it's yours-man up. if not, then sue her.

Alanna the fellator...

_______________________________________________
“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.”

Bumped with an update:

http://alanajoy.tumblr.com/page/16

***warning, ugly belly pics*********

I've already forgotten who exactly this Cow is.

Saw this lowing on the last blog post Bell Flower just put up ~

Quote
Deluded Cow
So am I not “doing it on my own” because I’m getting my health care covered? What the hell is wrong with you? The baby’s “father” has, to this day, still not been in touch and still not done ANYTHING WHATSOEVER to help.

I’ve done this ON. MY. OWN.

Why does that scare you?

Um, Cow - I don't think it's scary, I think it's lying. If you're getting gov. health care you are NOT *doing it all on your own*. And why ISN'T the father stepping up?

When I saw the old thread I thought we had a troll.

~~~~~~~~~~~
I miss my little feather baby.

Apologies to light haired members. She is the poster bitch for all blonde jokes.

"You cant fix stupid. There is no pill you can take, no class to go to. Stupid is forever." Ron White

Quote
Zzelda
I've already forgotten who exactly this Cow is.

Saw this lowing on the last blog post Bell Flower just put up ~

Quote
Deluded Cow
So am I not “doing it on my own” because I’m getting my health care covered? What the hell is wrong with you? The baby’s “father” has, to this day, still not been in touch and still not done ANYTHING WHATSOEVER to help.

I’ve done this ON. MY. OWN.

Why does that scare you?

Um, Cow - I don't think it's scary, I think it's lying. If you're getting gov. health care you are NOT *doing it all on your own*. And why ISN'T the father stepping up?

If I were the sperm donor, I'd not step up either, except to pay for the abortion. There's no reason why he should have to pay for this bastard child. They had a 2 month affair. I think this skank ooopsed him for his $$$$ because he has a good job and she saw baby and big child support $$$. But it ain't happening. Good for him.

Stupid bitch can afford a $400 stroller, but not medical care?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What is a home without children? Quiet. ~Henny Youngman

I don't want people who want to dance, I want people who have to dance. ~George Balanchine

"I took the batteries out of my biological clock and put them in my vibrator"

"WHAT. EV. ER. I do what I want!" Hope she's happy, now that her life is a 24/7 shit show.

--------------------
"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny

I only have half assed completely useless health insurance - because it's mandated by some life insurance on me, which my biz partners wanted - in case I die. So they don't lose money.

I hope I don't need to worry about anyone killing me off or anything

No, I trust these people. I'm worth more alive, anyway. Presently.

Ooooh Jeeziz - I hope this doesn't turn into like a bad "Columbo" episode or something ~

(Note to self, don't buy a vintage 60s Jaguar. Get that, someone cuts the brakes, Columbo shows up.)

Bumping this just for fun.

She hatched the loaf, and it definitely looks like the father.

Ca-ching, let the wallet raid commence for the next 18 plus years!

Quote
bell_flower
Bumping this just for fun.

She hatched the loaf, and it definitely looks like the father.

Ca-ching, let the wallet raid commence for the next 18 plus years!

This is when old-fashioned laws seem so modern....

The law in France concerning newborn babies is that the father must go to the local town hall and register in person as the baby's father within several days (3, I think) of the child's birth. If he doesn't do that, or if he waits longer than several days, then he legally cannot claim paternity, and the kid won't have his last name. Most fathers go immediately to city hall to register themselves as the kid's father. The law was to protect men from women such as Alana, with bastard children. After all, if the kid isn't legally yours, then it cannot claim property rights, inheritance, etc. This is an OLD law on the books. You cannot DNA test after the fact and sue for $$$.

If Alana lived in France, she couldn't claim anything against the guy if he failed to register.

Honestly, I don't think the French law is all that great. Why should a man be able to walk away from a child he created? No wonder France is broke.

I'm not on either person's "side" here. She's a bimbo, but so is he. Oopsie or not, he should have to pay for the kid if he is the biological father.

Quote
bell_flower
Honestly, I don't think the French law is all that great. Why should a man be able to walk away from a child he created? No wonder France is broke.

I'm not on either person's "side" here. She's a bimbo, but so is he. Oopsie or not, he should have to pay for the kid if he is the biological father.

I think the law is a good thing. 99% of fathers register themselves as the kid's father. But for people like Alana, who try to oops a rich guy for his money, they have no recourse if he says no. If she has the kid, then she does it alone. That alone levels the playing field against goldigger bimbos. I might also add that abortion is legal there, without all the restrictions that we have here in the USA. There is no fundie religious right there trying to control society.

Is the Duh still not involved with the kid?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What is a home without children? Quiet. ~Henny Youngman

I don't want people who want to dance, I want people who have to dance. ~George Balanchine

"I took the batteries out of my biological clock and put them in my vibrator"

Quote
myrna minkoff
jesus christ, does NO ONE use birth control anymore?

:bedmadelie

right????? yes indeed WTF. These stupid coonts act like they're living in the 1930s. :drool

but i strongly suspect this whole thing was an oopsy set-up. most of them are actually. I don't fuckin believe these bitches OMGFORGOT and it looks like the hapless duhd in the story is loaded, so there you go. :baybie1

The rich guy chose to ride bareback, in spite of all the articles, blogs and websites talking about golddiggers and the oops tactic. I won't even go into STDs floating around out there.

My give-a-fuck meter is stuck on zero because he was too cheap to buy a rubber.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

Sorry to re-necro this thread (okay, not really... it's very entertaining hence it being in the Epic Threads section), but I looked at Alana the Joyful Fellater (if only she had just left it at that...)'s tumblr and saw baby pics.

Am I horrible for being gleeful that the baybee looks like the cunt's sperm donor?!

___________________________________________________________________________

My tits and ass with soul, baby!

Quote
agatha trunchbull
Sorry to re-necro this thread (okay, not really... it's very entertaining hence it being in the Epic Threads section), but I looked at Alana the Joyful Fellater (if only she had just left it at that...)'s tumblr and saw baby pics.

Am I horrible for being gleeful that the baybee looks like the cunt's sperm donor?!

___________________________________________________________________________

I just hope for the loaf's sake it isn't mental and narcissistic like its moo.