TIME cover story: Are you mom enough?

A backpack you can never put down...that is exactly what my shoulders feel like.

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From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
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I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

Yeah, Im a college student. Small back packs are a thing of the past.. :bawl

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So.. We know that food and water are running out, with overpopulation and all... Yet people keep on poppin' out those babies! I guess they want to have their baby and eat it too...

My top reason is that parenting gives you a free license to be selfish based purely on the fact that you're being selfish for an emanation of your own self. The illusion that what you do to benefit your children benefits them solely is a fallacy. Every parent benefits from the benefits that their children receive. Henceforth, it gives one a license to perpetuate a dog-eat-dog mentality that I perceive to be amoral. Parents say that their children are their greatest loves, what they forget to add is that they are their ONLY loves and only because their children are a reflection of themselves. I prefer to be able to love multiple people and have lasting relationships of many types and possess the essential core value of empathy for all than to restrict myself to an echo chamber of ego-masturbation and self-serving chicanery.

In short: Not parenting makes you a better person.

Here's a GREAT response to the story from May 10th (OK, so it's from a parent, but I think it's good anyway):

http://www.boston.com/community/moms/blogs/24_hour_workday/2012/05/motherhood-mom-enough-advice.html

By Kara Baskin

Excerpts (this is roughly half the column):

.........The story also made me think about what I wanted to teach Andrew—I mean really teach him. I’m not talking about the trendy must-dos that crop up each year about feeding and sleeping and discipline, insecurity porn concocted just in time to fill a fresh generation of parents with self-doubt. No, I’m talking about the things that I want to impart in average, totally inextreme moments, when my breasts are covered and my skinny jeans are in the wash.

Here’s my wish list.

I hope I raise a child who says “thank you” to the bus driver when he gets off the bus, “please” to the waiter taking his order at the restaurant, and holds the elevator doors when someone’s rushing to get in.

I hope I raise a child who loses graciously and wins without bragging. I hope he learns that disappointments are fleeting and so are triumphs, and if he comes home at night to people who love him, neither one matter. Nobody is keeping score, except sometimes on Facebook.

I hope I raise a child who is kind to old people.

I hope I raise a child who realizes that life is unfair: Some people are born rich or gorgeous. Some people really are handed things that they don’t deserve. Some people luck into jobs or wealth that they don’t earn. Tough.

I hope I raise a child who gets what he wants just often enough to keep him optimistic but not enough to make him spoiled.

I hope I raise a child who knows that he’s loved and special but that he’s not the center of the universe and never, ever will be.

I hope I raise a child who will stick up for a kid who’s being bullied on the playground. I also hope I raise a child who, if he’s the one being bullied, fights back. Hard. Oh, and if he’s the bully? I hope he realizes that his mother, who once wore brown plastic glasses and read the phonebook on the school bus, will cause him more pain than a bully ever could..............

(snip)

And.....there are more than 80 comments.

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yurble
...and if you look at modern breast feeding in this light, the woman who "has to" go to the office will never practice extended breast feeding. Only a woman who has plenty of free time will be able to do this. I do wonder if they're trying to show their wealth by advertising their ability to engage in a leisure activity (subconciously, because outwardly they're trying to push perfect motherhood). It just hasn't taken off among the celebrities, who, by and large, are still following the cult of the eternally youthful body (which means no obvious marks of motherhood).

Yes, that is really something to think about. There is also a status of having a large family, IF the kyds can be supported on one income. Otherwise, large families do not have such status. It's weird how people feel they have to do that. I recall little of that kind of thing in the seventies, except a year round tan being associated with people who had the resources to vacation in warmer climates. The eighties changed everything - it just blew up and became all about status and excess and looking rich even if you were not. Credit, baby.

If it seems crass to do it with fancy cars and houses in these economic times, why not use something like EBF in an attempt to display status? I believe it.

Thanks for sharing this, Lenona. Based on that woman's article, she reminded me a lot of my mother.

Thank you so much Lenona for sharing that article. Wow, if there were more Kara Baskins out here I probably wouldn't despise children (and their parents) so much, I would probably enjoy going out in public more.

I couldn't resist ...



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" ... what's one more once you've already got two shedding on the couch?"

larious

hankyou


:jump

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“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.”

Love it, Trekkie Monster!

:jump

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" ... what's one more once you've already got two shedding on the couch?"

That was a good article, sent to my BFF who is a mom.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
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I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

Gross. People sexualing breastfeeding.






Mod note. Asshole you were banned several times. Go away and do not come back

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loavesstillsuck
THE HORROR! The look of the self-satisfied moos standing their with their adult children (well, practically) sucking on their udders. . . . . . . glaring into the camera lens as if to say "I dare you to think of me sexually with a kid sucking off of me!"

BLEAH! There is no word appropriate enough, save for BLEAAAAAAH and VOMMITTTT.

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Passive Aggressive
Master Of Anti-brat
Excuses!

old thread... they are all oldies but goodies

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.

I for one would LOVE to see that moo baby wear that brat. He looks like he weighs at least 60% as much as her.

I recall more than one geezer moo who decided to continue beefing the youngest child, for whatever reason. I'm wondering if some of this is ego? Geezer moo can really talk it up with those 25 year old mahms, makes her feel younger? I've always thought being a parunt would make a person feel damned old.

A year or two ago I saw a man pushing 60 parading a brat around. Seemed damn proud of it. What he didn't realize is that most of us assume he is either the grand or great-grand.