What the rest of the web is like: "I'm glad I'm childfree" and it all goes downhill from there

AKA: Why I'm glad this space exists.

Get a load of this forum where someone makes the simple statement:

"Sometimes I just can't believe how lucky I am to be childfree!"

Breeders descend and it turns into the predicable, ugly, 16-page thread, with all the defensive things you can expect from people who won't allow someone's life choice to pass them without judgement. WARNING: You'll be pissed off by the usual bingoes, I'm-a-great-parent-I-don't-let-my-kids-watch-TV justifications, accusations of being a feminazi, etc.

I have to say, this FR guy is simple and to the point, but it's not as if anyone is listening to her. And Cyberfluff gets on my nerves. Oh great, a Breeder "IT" expert.

So glad we have this space and don't have to deal with that shit.

Oh yeah, some quality bingoes there including the "but you don't know real love until you've had a chyyyld" chestnut.

If the breeders were really so happy in their lives with their brats, being SHAMoo or big man provider Duh, why would they feel the need to be so defensive just because someone feels happy with their choice not to have kids?

That's basically the attitude I get if I say I'm CF on a site that is not specifically for CFers. I remember telling people on a forum I used to be a member of that no, I would not regret having an abortion because I am childfree. Cue five entire pages of the members (all Moos, some teen-Moos) trying to analyze me and figure out what must be wrong with me to make me hate babies so much. There were typical bingoes like "she must have had a bad childhood" and "children are the best thing that could ever happen to a woman." But then I also got the totally new, original bingo of "you're too loose to get pregnant and it give you a sad." eyes2

It sucks that so many people still get so pissy over childfreedom. I think CFness has managed to become more taboo that homosexuality among the general public. If they don't agree with the choice, then can they not just shut the fuck up and say, "Not for me, but glad it makes you happy?" Why's that so fuckin' hard, especially when someone's choice to not breed does not in any way impact these other people's lives? What exactly do they think they'll accomplish by telling this person that they're wrong, missing out, a lesbian, a feminist, etc.? Breeders are not expected to defend their choice to procreate. It's lame that we have to, and people STILL will argue with us about it anyway. I also like when some of the members on that site take bingoes and turn them back on the breeders and the breeders get butthurt. Oh it's okay to bitch at the silly childfree person, but how dare you question the almighty MOOO!

I never understood bingoes. One person's choice to not have kids does not affect the people launching bingoes, and not only that, but why would you wish kids on someone who obviously does not want them? Anyone who has ever been an unwanted child knows it's not a nice way to grow up. That's a real dick thing to wish on a kid.

At the very least, I'm glad to see that person has a little tiny support from others, but I don't know if those others are actually childfree or just childless.

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yummynotmummy
If the breeders were really so happy in their lives with their brats, being SHAMoo or big man provider Duh, why would they feel the need to be so defensive just because someone feels happy with their choice not to have kids?

They are not happy about it. If they were they wouldn't need to sell the lifestyle.

It's pretty sad they have to wait for a child to experience real love. Like they didn't have that parent-child love with their own parents... Well, breeders.

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"Don't you know how to deal with children?!"
"I don't like animals who act on instinct."
I think you're on to something Akihiko.

I repeat: the people who are truly happy with being parents don't bingo. It is these folk who have to brainwash themselves into thinking they are happy and, crab in bucket, try to drag others into it, who are the biggest parrots of the baby rabies bull shit.

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.

This is just another example on "misery loves company" and regret.

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empresskitty
This is just another example on "misery loves company" and regret.

Agreed. Why the hell should it make any difference, except Breeders often think the childfree are "getting away with" something.:smoke

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twocents
I repeat: the people who are truly happy with being parents don't bingo. It is these folk who have to brainwash themselves into thinking they are happy and, crab in bucket, try to drag others into it, who are the biggest parrots of the baby rabies bull shit.

Very true. In fact, I have been told the opposite by some honest people. One of the people that I have met recently asked me how many kids I had. I told him:"None". Without a pause or any kind or even a thought, this man told me:"You aint missing shit!". This guy is an older dude and has raised 3 kids.

Also, people who have always wanted to parent and who became responsible parents, I have never been bingoed by such people. People who usually moan and groan are the ones who either got talked into parenting or the ones that had an oopsie and did not abort it.

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Cambion
Anyone who has ever been an unwanted child knows it's not a nice way to grow up. That's a real dick thing to wish on a kid.

This. As I am fond of saying, there are things way, waaaaaaaay worse than merely not existing. If only we could get the forced-birthers to understand that simple concept.

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skyeyes

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Cambion
Anyone who has ever been an unwanted child knows it's not a nice way to grow up. That's a real dick thing to wish on a kid.

This. As I am fond of saying, there are things way, waaaaaaaay worse than merely not existing. If only we could get the forced-birthers to understand that simple concept.

Most forced birthers have no sympathy of any kind. Telling them that someone may suffer is really pointless and may actually entice them even further. Forced birthers do not wish good life onto anyone. Opposite may be true.

Breeders are never happy with others who don't go along with the lifescript. Their thinly-veiled resentment towards the CF is so obvious, it only makes me wonder how happy are they REALLY? If they feel the need to lash out towards us, then they must be feeling pretty insecure about the choices they made with their own lives.

I never talk about my CFdom with anyone, unless they know me really well - or here on BratFree. Most people are breeders, and most people will look down on us like we're trash because we've chosen not to breed. It really pisses me off.

There have been a few older breeders who have told me, "Good for you for not having kyds", even confiding with me that if they could go back and do it all over again, they'd never have them. Breeders may hate us, but that's because they secretly envy us.

Oh, a Swedish site in English.

I used to have a Swedish penpal - a single mother, unmarried - could not grasp the fact I was childfree and she thought it weird. Yeah from someone who supposedly lives in a "progressive" nation.

Whatever.

It's the same thing when people hear the word "vegetarian." Even if it's as innocuous as "I really like this restaurant and I am glad they have vegetarian choices." eyes2

Cave-people terrified of anything even slightly out of their comfort zone.

I love how just a simple statement like "I love being CF" gets pages and pages of bingo responses. How many times a day to the CF get to hear how supposedly *wonderful* it is being a parent? I'm like, yeah, whatever, glad I'm not you, and go about my day. There is SO much butthurt when a CF person takes pride in being CF.

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Cambion
I think CFness has managed to become more taboo that homosexuality among the general public.

Many of my friends who are supportive about legalizing gay marriage and equal rights and consider themselves very liberal have a hard time with the idea of a hetero married couple not procreating. I think that's pretty common actually. They can't connect the dots that if they respect the rights for anyone to marry, then they need to respect the rights of those married people to choose how to conduct their marriages, even if that means no kids, and even if that seems "weird" to them.

I think that the lives of breeders really suck because they always want to pee in the Cheerio bowls of the CF. It tells you a lot about people when they swarm over a simple statement. So what if someone is happy they are CF? A breeder might be happy because Shitley makes lovely shit paintings on the walls. Whatever floats your boat.

It's like getting mad at me because I prefer a certain style of clothing, food, or music. If the choice of breeding is so life-altering to them that they must be at war with people who simply have no desire for children, then that really shows me that breeding is an awful choice. Maybe the breeders also feel duped when they find out that breeding is a choice they didn't have to buy into to begin with.

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selidororous
I used to have a Swedish penpal - a single mother, unmarried - could not grasp the fact I was childfree and she thought it weird. Yeah from someone who supposedly lives in a "progressive" nation.

They are progressive when it comes to living standards and other life choices such as single parenthood, gay marriage etc. but CF lifestyle is still the ultimate taboo. And besides Nordic countries are extremely child-friendly.

To be honest, besides this site i am not talking about my CF-dom anymore. I had a phase few years ago when i was blunt about it but it got very ugly, including nasty insults, isolation and even threats. (The one with the threats was the idiot i mentioned here several times who called me a whore because i'm CF). So, yeah, i mention it to people i know very well and that's not too many.

I never mention it in online spaces because i figure out that such thing might happen. People get very agressive towards you in real life about this issue. On the internet it gets even worse.

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milenascarlet

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yummynotmummy
If the breeders were really so happy in their lives with their brats, being SHAMoo or big man provider Duh, why would they feel the need to be so defensive just because someone feels happy with their choice not to have kids?

They are not happy about it. If they were they wouldn't need to sell the lifestyle.

It's pretty sad they have to wait for a child to experience real love. Like they didn't have that parent-child love with their own parents... Well, breeders.

Exactly. If one were to say how they could never be an accountant, no one would bat an eyelash. You can say that to a room full of accountants and none will tell you that "it must be that you can't hold a pencil so it gives you a sad." They would shrug and move on.

And what does loose have to do with it...since it is the loose ones who get knocked up by random men.

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From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
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I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

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navi8orgirl

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milenascarlet

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yummynotmummy
If the breeders were really so happy in their lives with their brats, being SHAMoo or big man provider Duh, why would they feel the need to be so defensive just because someone feels happy with their choice not to have kids?

They are not happy about it. If they were they wouldn't need to sell the lifestyle.

It's pretty sad they have to wait for a child to experience real love. Like they didn't have that parent-child love with their own parents... Well, breeders.

Exactly. If one were to say how they could never be an accountant, no one would bat an eyelash. You can say that to a room full of accountants and none will tell you that "it must be that you can't hold a pencil so it gives you a sad." They would shrug and move on.

And what does loose have to do with it...since it is the loose ones who get knocked up by random men.

I don't know how a woman can become loose by not having children. Unless the penis is the same as a baby's head I don't see it becoming loose. But then again I don't go by believing mouth-to-mouth tales...

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"Don't you know how to deal with children?!"
"I don't like animals who act on instinct."
I think you're on to something Akihiko.

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I don't know how a woman can become loose by not having children. Unless the penis is the same as a baby's head I don't see it becoming loose. But then again I don't go by believing mouth-to-mouth tales...

On this same forum, I had also discussed my weight, and some of the Moo members went through old posts and reached the conclusion that because I'm obese, that meant I have a gaping chasm of a pussy. Or possibly suggesting that because I'm a woman with no kids, I must be a filthy whore and I've fucked so much that there is no traction left at all. Which, of course, means I'm such a bitter child-hater because I'm not tight enough to make a man come and knock me up. Well, if tightness is what determined whether or not a woman gets pregnant, how is it so many women get knocked up more than once after a vaginal birth? I give them credit for making a new bingo, but logic is not strong with these people.

I suppose if you use increasingly large dildos and stretch yourself out over time, you could be loose without ever having passed a loaf. Not my thing, but to each their own. Personally, I like not needing a two-liter bottle and a jar of Vaseline to get off.

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Cambion

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I don't know how a woman can become loose by not having children. Unless the penis is the same as a baby's head I don't see it becoming loose. But then again I don't go by believing mouth-to-mouth tales...

On this same forum, I had also discussed my weight, and some of the Moo members went through old posts and reached the conclusion that because I'm obese, that meant I have a gaping chasm of a pussy. Or possibly suggesting that because I'm a woman with no kids, I must be a filthy whore and I've fucked so much that there is no traction left at all. Which, of course, means I'm such a bitter child-hater because I'm not tight enough to make a man come and knock me up. Well, if tightness is what determined whether or not a woman gets pregnant, how is it so many women get knocked up more than once after a vaginal birth? I give them credit for making a new bingo, but logic is not strong with these people.

I suppose if you use increasingly large dildos and stretch yourself out over time, you could be loose without ever having passed a loaf. Not my thing, but to each their own. Personally, I like not needing a two-liter bottle and a jar of Vaseline to get off.

I don't get that logic either, since many inpigs are massively fat to begin with. By their thinking, nobody who has sluiced even once should be able to sluice a second loaf, with their gaping vassholes and stretched-out cooters.

Talk about projection!

I don't always use the term CF because many people don't know what the term means but if people come out and ask me I will tell them I am not having kyds. Most people accept that but if I get the whole "these things just happen" garbage I tell them that "these things don't just happen to me." I do remember people coming up to me at my wedding who were concerned that I was going to Mexico during the early days of H1N1 and would that hurt the baybee if I got pregnant on the honeymoon. Gross. Why would I ruin my honeymoon by getting knocked up?

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blackpearl

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selidororous
I used to have a Swedish penpal - a single mother, unmarried - could not grasp the fact I was childfree and she thought it weird. Yeah from someone who supposedly lives in a "progressive" nation.

They are progressive when it comes to living standards and other life choices such as single parenthood, gay marriage etc. but CF lifestyle is still the ultimate taboo. And besides Nordic countries are extremely child-friendly.

While this is very true, I'm yet to be bingoed by a Swede, and I've been living here for over three years while being openly CF. Who knows, I might have just been lucky.

I tried reading through this, popcorn ready and all, but then it just turned into a bunch of "mooier than thou" drivel.

I don't have low self-esteem. That's a mistake. I have low esteem for everyone else.
-Daria

I really don't understand why people with kids find it so incredibly offensive that there are people who do not want kids. Is it somehow affecting their life in a negative way?

Why is it any of their business why I am child free? why does it offend them so much? I didn't have a bad childhood, I had an awesome childhood, with terrific parents that I love dearly, and I am very close with my entire family. In fact, next week I am going to Maryland to see my sister, and will be flying up there with my mom. We do this every year. If I had had such a terrible childhood, why would I choose to spend time with my family?

I have friends who have kids, and they don't have a problem with me not having any nor wanting any. Why can't everyone else accept that there are people who do not want children?

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evilchildlessbitch
I don't always use the term CF because many people don't know what the term means but if people come out and ask me I will tell them I am not having kyds. Most people accept that but if I get the whole "these things just happen" garbage I tell them that "these things don't just happen to me." I do remember people coming up to me at my wedding who were concerned that I was going to Mexico during the early days of H1N1 and would that hurt the baybee if I got pregnant on the honeymoon. Gross. Why would I ruin my honeymoon by getting knocked up?

Gee how "kind" of them to worry about your health. "There is a terrible disease going around and you could get it... then what would happen to the baybee?" Never mind what it would do to you a nonexistent baybee could be affected and we can't have that. eyes2

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awesominatrix
While this is very true, I'm yet to be bingoed by a Swede, and I've been living here for over three years while being openly CF. Who knows, I might have just been lucky. .

I've been living in Finland for five years now and i've been heavily bingoed to the point of extreme rudeness. One of the reasons i went back into the closet so to say. The main bingoers are women over 40 and young guys under 30. Maybe it is related to the fact that i live in a more religious part where usually a woman's life revolves around family and kids.