"My Kid Won't Wipe His Ass!" Stories

More nasty shit we won't have to be bothered with selected from literally PAGES of Moo complaints across the World Wide Web. I couldn't help but notice that out of ALL the complaints, and they are near infinite, there wasn't ONE duddy. So, either they don't post this shit on the internet OR they don't deal with kids and their ass problems. Below are the stories with my commentary in red.


1) My 8 Y/O Step Daughter Stinks
i'm having this issue with my step daughter. Ever since i met her (she had just turned 8) she didn't wipe. I've had many talks with her about the issue. Now it's like here and there she doesn't wipe. Some of my biggest concerns is the fact that she's extremely over weight and i know she will be getting her period soon which makes me all the more concerned because she already smells because she isn't cleaning herself properly. I've discussed UTI's and smelling with her, been so blunt that i told her she smells and have asked her if she smells herself too when she opens her legs (she said yes, and that it's gross). This girl has psychological problems and I'll bet they are Step-Moo related.

Another big concern i have with her poor hygiene is that i have a 5 month old that i don't want her touching because i constantly look at her as a germ walking. When i can i tell her to wash her hands. i've explained how sick she can make the baby and even told her that she can kill the baby with her germs if he gets too sick. i hate doing it, but i thought putting fear into it would help, but it doesn't. That's about what I thought. The cow had a "one of our own"™ loaf and she's berating her and exaggerating in an intimidating manner how she can "kill" the fresh loaf, who the kid is already probably jealous of. Calling her a "germ walking" only illustrates the Step-Moo's animosity for her. Not ONCE has she mentioned the effects this stinky butt has on the girl in any way but demeaning and threatening, just the baybee.down

When my husband spoke to her mother about it, she replied with "she doesn't do that when she's with me. " Which makes me wonder, is she not paying enough attention to her that this is her cry for attention? Such a frustrating thing to have to go through. Especially because she isn't my biological daughter and i have a huge fear she's going to get my baby sickTherein lies the problem. If she treated the kid with an ounce of love or respect I bet THIS case of nasty ass would cure itself immediately.

2) Help She Won't Wipe Her Butt!
My daughter Amelia absolutely refuses to wipe her butt after she goes poop.. Whenever she goes into the bathroom I have to stand outside the door or in there with her to make sure she wipes and still she will make me do it. I don't know how to get her to do it... I tell her she's making poop go in her underwear but she doesn't seem to mind, she'll just take it off and run around in the buff. If you have any ideas let me know! Yeah, I have an idea. How about make HER wipe her ass instead of YOU being "made" to do it. I can't imagine wasting so much time standing guard outside of the bathroom and deal with this type of nasty nonsense.:

3) Why won't he wipe his butt??!!
Hi, my 9yo GFG NEVER wipes his butt or washes his hands after using the restroom. I'm sure he gets away with it all day at school and camp, but around the house it never occurs to him to close the bathroom door so I'm painfully aware of what's going on. As if her NOT knowing about it would make it okay.

Usually I just shout up the stairs, "GFG! Wipe your butt! Wash your hands!" and he will go back and do it, but c'mon, he's NINE. I'm not sure if it's a sensory thing (he is sensitive to loud noise and food textures, says he doesn't like the cold water on his warm hands...neglecting the fact that we actually have hot water in the house ) or if it's an ADHD thing (gotta move on to the next thing NOW!) but it's driving me nuts! He fully understands the WHY of it - he understands about germs and bacteria. In general the rest of his hygiene (bathing, tooth brushing, etc.) is on par with a typical 9yo. How would you deal with this? She's making all these excuses when all it boils down to is he is one NASTY little shitbag.down

4) Moo Comment^^^
We emphasised wiping in our house but had to police it a fair bit. For us, the 'skid marks" were on underwear but mostly on the walls. WHat would happen - they would wipe, then get it on their hands and wipe THAT off on the wall. So I would make them come back and clean the wall. When they denied ownership, I made them take turns at washing down the walls (so peer pressure worked, they hassled each other).What worked best - policing it plus installing wet wipes and a bin to put them in. I used my nose to check whether they had cleaned themselves up properly. If they didn't wipe properly, they would get a sore tail (which we anointed with either cooking oil or coconut oil). If they wiped properly but got it on their hands and didn't wash, their hands would smell. I have never heard of a kid who would skip hand washing, yet have enough SHIT on his hands to fucking wipe it off on the fucking WALL.I also can't imagine chasing around after these dirty kids and sniffing their asses and hands all the time either. Oh and "anointing" a "sore tail" caked with shit with COOKING oil? Jeeez, if the little fucker started running about and getting sweaty it'd probably smell like a fucking greasy sizzling shit burger

5) My 9 YEAR Old Won't WIPE HIMSELF AFTER pooping...Grrrrrr!!!!! YUCKKKKKK
When he was first completely potty trained he did wipe himself, but sometime in the last year, I don't know if he became lazy or just forgets that he needs to do it. It is so disgusting when I do laundry some days. When I find his boxers with the poop stains in them, I make him clean them up and put them in the washer but I don't always see them if the white boxers are mixed with other white colors. I've also told him that kids are going to start teasing him the older he gets and he keeps doing it. Doesn't seem to sink in. I am betting peer pressure will cause this nasty little fucker to finally clean his bum.

6) Five y/o won't wipe his butt
I'm at my wit's end with my five year old. He is completely potty trained but will not wipe his own butt. We usually watch him at home to make sure (and it's always a battle to make sure he does it to the point of being clean) but he's been coming home from school with horrid skid marks in his underpants and a dirty butt. I've explained to him over and over how unhealthy it is to not be clean there and even had him clean his own underpants in the sinkbut the message just won't go through. Any advice? I don't know HOW a kid this age, and certainly the older ones, can walk around all day with chunks of shit on their asses! It CAN'T be comfortable and it MUST be greasy and itch in addition to the horrendous odor!



http://community.babycenter.com/post/a22932317/help_she_wont_wipe_her_butt

http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/why-wont-he-wipe-his-butt.26576/#axzz38tm5iGCK

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Child-Behavior/My-8-year-old-will-not-wipe-properly-after-using-the-toilet/show/1343037

http://www.mamapedia.com/article/my-9-year-old-wont-wipe-himself-after-poopinggrrrrrr-yuckkkkkk

http://www.babygaga.com/t-241430/5-year-old-won-t-wipe-his-butt.html

https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20081229181501AARO4kC

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

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kidlesskim
1) My 8 Y/O Step Daughter Stinks
i'm having this issue with my step daughter. Ever since i met her (she had just turned 8) she didn't wipe. I've had many talks with her about the issue. Now it's like here and there she doesn't wipe. Some of my biggest concerns is the fact that she's extremely over weight

...and who exactly is overfeeding her? I wouldn't be surprised if the weight gain was the result of more of the stepmoo's abuse. I bet A Loaf Of Our Own is a perfectly healthy weight.

Sorry kidlesskim but I couldn't read the rest of this post as it was making me feel nauseous. How are so many parents unable to teach their children basic life skills, and why aren't they more ashamed?::brbl::brbl::brbl

Wiping shit on the walls? Running around with smelly, poop-encrusted butts?

Jeebus, these people are NASTY.

This is a discipline problem. I'm sure these kids aren't listening to a thing their parents say to them about any topic.

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screaming sausage

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kidlesskim
1) My 8 Y/O Step Daughter Stinks
i'm having this issue with my step daughter. Ever since i met her (she had just turned 8) she didn't wipe. I've had many talks with her about the issue. Now it's like here and there she doesn't wipe. Some of my biggest concerns is the fact that she's extremely over weight

...and who exactly is overfeeding her? I wouldn't be surprised if the weight gain was the result of more of the stepmoo's abuse. I bet A Loaf Of Our Own is a perfectly healthy weight.

Sorry kidlesskim but I couldn't read the rest of this post as it was making me feel nauseous. How are so many parents unable to teach their children basic life skills, and why aren't they more ashamed?::brbl::brbl::brbl

Maybe not even OVER-feeding her, but feeding her pure CRAP -- perhaps, heating up some chicken nuggets and calling it a day.

As far as the 'not wiping' thing -- sudden regression in toileting issues may be a red flag for some kind of sexual abuse. The girl's real mother said "she doesn't do that when she's with me" -- makes me wonder what's going on in step-moo's house. Even if I am mistaken, and the girl just doesn't get enough attention, a kid doesn't suddenly decide to eschew wiping their ass for no reason.

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kidlesskim
"GFG! Wipe your butt! Wash your hands!"

larious

We can't help them, but we can help ourselves ~

Just remember - these shit encrusted kids are out in public.
Touching things ~

BE SURE TO WASH YOUR HANDS!

Be sure to wash off things you buy.

I basically clean - everything ~

I got two new lamps at garage sales recently - both were virtually brand new and clean. But - you bet your ass I cleaned them when I got home. Vacuumed off the shades and Windex'd the rest.

Grocery shopping - fruits and veges. Yes you have to wash them - besides 'the usual' what may be on there - Shitty Fingered Kids (Or Shitty Fingered Butt Wiping Moos) - may have touched them.

In fact, if you think of it, these filthy pigs may have fingered anything ~

Whatever you buy - it's best to 'wipe it off' a bit - just to be sure.

Another thing I heard - the risk is greater for 'picking up things' with eating prepared foods. Fast Food especially. That right there = Diet Boost! / I lost 10 lbs - because I COMPLETELY QUIT all Fast Food. Shit Encrusted Moo or Slob Teen working there might have Shitty Fingers. Try to cook and eat at home. What sealed the deal for me was - I was out with a friend a couple weeks ago - she said - let's get Arby's, they got these BLT's on sale ~ OK. I was tired.

AND IT WAS GARBAGE!!! It didn't make me sick but it was MONDO CRAPPY! I can make THAT *at home*! And do a better job of it too! And it's cheaper!

Germophobia caused me to cut out ALL Fast Foods / take out. (From crappy places, anyway.) And I lost 10 lbs to boot! YAY!
(Crap Food is also full of all sorts of chemicals that can upset the digestion and make you sick too.)

Plus - I haven't been sick at all lately!

That's an easy fix - what's more insidious is the shit fingered kids that may have been touching the food you buy. Including packaging. Or anything. I'm about to buy some new hardware / tools / home improvement supplies soon - how do you know some shit encrusted kid didn't rub it's ass or shit coated fingers all over these things? Kids do love to handle ALL things. You have no way of knowing. Especially now that breeders drag their kids everywhere and don't watch them.

So - WASH YOUR HANDS! OFTEN! DO NOT HANDLE OUTSIDE THINGS AND THEN TOUCH YOUR FACE!

STAY AWAY FROM PREPARED FOOD! It might have been made by a shit fingered slob!

Go ahead and call me a Germophobe all you want! I do NOT want to get sick! I do NOT want to ingest someone else's SHIT!!!

Oh yes, I too avoid fast food and restaurants due to germophobia/emetophobia. Too many horror stories of food handlers coming to work sick and puking/shitting everywhere. (Most do not have sick days and thus CAN'T stay home). This Mother Jones article sealed the deal for me.

But filthy poop hands in grocery stores are a harder problem to avoid. I recently read that produce is more likely to make you sick than meat because it sits out in the open in stores. And buffets/salad bars are obviously a no-go. What's a sanitary person to eat? :goggle

So much illness could be prevented if sickos simply stayed home and used proper hygiene. All kids are disgusting germ vectors but these non-wipers are sick in the head. I've never heard of such filth.

Also remember that a lot of these little fuckers aren't vaccinated, so make sure your own vaccinations are all up to date- and then STAY THE FUCK AWAY from them anyway.

I don't get these kids - when I was young you dreaded being smelly and being teased. These kids these days must be as stinky and gross aseach other.

They all get potty trained so late too is it any surprise they're behind the curve when it comes to toilet hygiene etc. That's what comes of "chyld led training" - kids are lazy little fucks and if they don't have to put the work in then they won't.

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Medusa

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kidlesskim
"GFG! Wipe your butt! Wash your hands!"

larious

GFG? Gluten-Free Girl? It wouldn't be out the realm of possibility that she doesn't wipe or wash her hands properly.

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"Why children take so long to grow? They eat and drink like pig and give nothing back. Must find way to accelerate process..."
- Dr. Yi Suchong, Bioshock

"Society does not need more children; but it does need more loved children. Quite literally, we cannot afford unloved children - but we pay heavily for them every day. There should not be the slightest communal concern when a woman elects to destroy the life of her thousandth-of-an-ounce embryo. But all society should rise up in alarm when it hears that a baby that is not wanted is about to be born."
- Garrett Hardin

"I feel like there's a message involved here somehow, but then I couldn't stop laughing at all the plotholes, like the part when North Korea has food."
- Youtube commentor referring to a North Korean cartoon.

"Reality is a bitch when it slowly crawls out of your vagina and shits in your lap."
- Reddit comment

"Bitch wants a baby, so we're gonna fuck now. #bareback"
- Cambion

Oh whatever. Abortion doctors are crimestoppers."
- Miss Hannigan

What disgusting little hogs. If these filthy brats insist on not wiping their own asses, this is what I'd do:

1.) Make kid do his or her own laundry. If they're too young or too short or too stupid to figure out the washing machine, make them hand-wash their shit-stained underwear.

2.) Kids who wipe shit on other surfaces will be forced to scrub the walls or floors or whatever the spot is that's been smeared with shit.

3.) Let the kid get sick.

4.) Make the kid wear rubber gloves so shit germs aren't on every fucking surface his shitty little piggy fingers touch.

5.) Let him go to school smelling like a sewer. Maybe when no one else wants to be near him or talk to him because of his shitty ass, he'll learn something.

6.) Beat the kid's ass when they insist on being filthy. Put on those elbow-length rubber gloves and wail the little monster.

I would not put up with such BS. If I had a shitty kid that refused to wipe, I'd fucking give him to the state.

All I can think of is, that will never be me! :jump

If I was a step-moo, I'm not sure I would be able to love a chyuld that was too worthless and stupid to wash her stank ass.

Just when you think it can't possibly get more disgusting...good Lord. If I had a kyd that stupid and/or lazy, I'd be inclined to get medieval on his (clothed) ass. These must be the same kyds who don't flush a public toilet after using it. Or piss on the seat...grrr.

Now I'm almost scared to get any more Blizzards

It takes a child to raze a village.

Fucking GROSS. I echo Cambion; if these were my kyds (and they never will be! smile) I would make them hand-wash their shitty underwear and scrub the walls. (At least a couple of the moos did that, though why the nasty little twerps didn't initially feel it was necessary to wipe their asses is a mystery.)

With the first one, though, I actually feel sorry for the girl. Stepmoo sounds insufferable, the girl is probably being ignored in favor of the OMGBABBY and stepmoo is telling her she could kill it by not wiping? If she wipes at her mom's house, I'm guessing the issue is related to something…possibly abuse...at duh/stepmoo's.

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rudeawakening
Fucking GROSS. I echo Cambion; if these were my kyds (and they never will be! smile) I would make them hand-wash their shitty underwear and scrub the walls. (At least a couple of the moos did that, though why the nasty little twerps didn't initially feel it was necessary to wipe their asses is a mystery.)

With the first one, though, I actually feel sorry for the girl. Stepmoo sounds insufferable, the girl is probably being ignored in favor of the OMGBABBY and stepmoo is telling her she could kill it by not wiping? If she wipes at her mom's house, I'm guessing the issue is related to something…possibly abuse...at duh/stepmoo's.

Maybe she is actually trying to kill the hatchling...

Maybe the stepkid is being abused and thinks that being smelly would stop Stepmoo's abuse.

------------------------------------------------------------
"Why children take so long to grow? They eat and drink like pig and give nothing back. Must find way to accelerate process..."
- Dr. Yi Suchong, Bioshock

"Society does not need more children; but it does need more loved children. Quite literally, we cannot afford unloved children - but we pay heavily for them every day. There should not be the slightest communal concern when a woman elects to destroy the life of her thousandth-of-an-ounce embryo. But all society should rise up in alarm when it hears that a baby that is not wanted is about to be born."
- Garrett Hardin

"I feel like there's a message involved here somehow, but then I couldn't stop laughing at all the plotholes, like the part when North Korea has food."
- Youtube commentor referring to a North Korean cartoon.

"Reality is a bitch when it slowly crawls out of your vagina and shits in your lap."
- Reddit comment

"Bitch wants a baby, so we're gonna fuck now. #bareback"
- Cambion

Oh whatever. Abortion doctors are crimestoppers."
- Miss Hannigan

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Zzelda
We can't help them, but we can help ourselves ~

Just remember - these shit encrusted kids are out in public.
Touching things ~

BE SURE TO WASH YOUR HANDS!

Be sure to wash off things you buy.

I basically clean - everything ~

I got two new lamps at garage sales recently - both were virtually brand new and clean. But - you bet your ass I cleaned them when I got home. Vacuumed off the shades and Windex'd the rest.

Grocery shopping - fruits and veges. Yes you have to wash them - besides 'the usual' what may be on there - Shitty Fingered Kids (Or Shitty Fingered Butt Wiping Moos) - may have touched them.

In fact, if you think of it, these filthy pigs may have fingered anything ~

Whatever you buy - it's best to 'wipe it off' a bit - just to be sure.

Another thing I heard - the risk is greater for 'picking up things' with eating prepared foods. Fast Food especially. That right there = Diet Boost! / I lost 10 lbs - because I COMPLETELY QUIT all Fast Food. Shit Encrusted Moo or Slob Teen working there might have Shitty Fingers. Try to cook and eat at home. What sealed the deal for me was - I was out with a friend a couple weeks ago - she said - let's get Arby's, they got these BLT's on sale ~ OK. I was tired.

AND IT WAS GARBAGE!!! It didn't make me sick but it was MONDO CRAPPY! I can make THAT *at home*! And do a better job of it too! And it's cheaper!

Germophobia caused me to cut out ALL Fast Foods / take out. (From crappy places, anyway.) And I lost 10 lbs to boot! YAY!
(Crap Food is also full of all sorts of chemicals that can upset the digestion and make you sick too.)

Plus - I haven't been sick at all lately!

That's an easy fix - what's more insidious is the shit fingered kids that may have been touching the food you buy. Including packaging. Or anything. I'm about to buy some new hardware / tools / home improvement supplies soon - how do you know some shit encrusted kid didn't rub it's ass or shit coated fingers all over these things? Kids do love to handle ALL things. You have no way of knowing. Especially now that breeders drag their kids everywhere and don't watch them.

So - WASH YOUR HANDS! OFTEN! DO NOT HANDLE OUTSIDE THINGS AND THEN TOUCH YOUR FACE!

STAY AWAY FROM PREPARED FOOD! It might have been made by a shit fingered slob!

Go ahead and call me a Germophobe all you want! I do NOT want to get sick! I do NOT want to ingest someone else's SHIT!!!

Hear,hear. Me also.wink I wash fruits and hard vegetables with soap and water before cutting into them. I do not think rinsing is good enough. Berries get rinsed, then spend two minutes in vodka, to hopefully sanitize thoroughly.
The 8 yr old in the first story is assured of one thing. If she stays dirty, she escapes all loaf caring and sitting tasks.:litebulb

Stepdaughter needs to go to a pediatrician ASAP to make sure nothing is physically wrong and to a child psychologist right afterward to rule out sexual abuse or mental problems.
After all that is done and other problems are ruled out, Duh needs to be assuming complete, total and 100% responsibility for his brat's disgusting habits. Stepmoo needs to move out until this gets under control. I am pretty sure that once Duh has to take all responsibility for wiping and laundry the behavior will stop. Stepmoo shouldn't be taking care of these sort of issues. Duh made the kid, and Duh can wipe her ass and wash her poop covered body and clothing.

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barren4ever
Berries get rinsed, then spend two minutes in vodka, to hopefully sanitize thoroughly.

Vodka? Lemme get right on that. :beer

Seriously, I had a peach the other day and got really horrible stomach cramps afterwards. So rinsing is definitely not enough.

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Stepdaughter needs to go to a pediatrician ASAP to make sure nothing is physically wrong and to a child psychologist right afterward to rule out sexual abuse or mental problems.

Exactly. What if Duh is the abuser? Moo says Stinky Girl is fine when she's with her.

@Zzelda

I wipe down everything I buy with a Clorox wipe or an alcohol wipe. I don't care if it is a box of Ibuprofen, I am wiping it down. People are nasty.

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"I have found little that is 'good' about human beings on the whole. In my experience most of them are trash, no matter whether they publicly subscribe to this or that ethical doctrine or to none at all."
~Sigmund Freud

I always choose the produce that's stacked above where loaves can reach. I pick from the back or top of the box, or take pieces from underneath/bottom of the box. The front is verboten no matter how good the produce looks.

Not wiping appropriately makes your ass itch! I dunno how these dirty brats stand the itching and burning except they probably have their fingers jammed in their asses all the time, scratching like apes.