Prince Baldy and Duchess Donothing announce Royal Sprog #2

Quote
Dorisan
Didn't take long for the commercial interests to use the event as a plug for their products

Fisher-Price Royal Birthday Bash

and the reason why royal families still exist shows it self, someone somewhere with real power is raking in the cash from the serfs the peons

_______________________________________________
“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.”

Quote
craftyzits
The minute this Scotland issue came up the birth control hit the trash! I'll bet dollars to dog turds

People here keep joking about this but the more they joke about it the less it seems like a joke. For a start she's only supposed to be 6-8 weeks gone and that's awfully early to be announcing a pregnancy. She had to cancel an engagement due to illness but any other excuse would have done here- like just "illness" rather than specifying HG. The announcement also came after the polls first suggested that more people will vote Yes and the leaders of the three main parties all shat themselves in their panic to get up here and plead for us all to vote No. Then there was the attempt to get our normally politically neutral Queen involved with all that "please don't let me be the last Queen of Scotland" bollocks- after all of this the New Royal Baybee announcement just seems like another desperate attempt to make us all want to stay in the Union.

It's another thing that shows how out of touch the No campaign's leaders are- no-one up here gives a fuck about the Royals, we'd rather be shot of them and get the chance to spend our public money on people who genuinely need it. I'd love to see Balmoral snatched from them and turned into social housing.

HG is giving the body a loud message - you are not meant to do this. You are not suitable for this. Vomiting is what happens when you are poisoned or your body is experiencing some negative disruption, be it from migraine or motion or whatever, the body wants to cleanse and the disruption to stop.

The person I know who had this condition said she would rather die than go through it again. They are glad they only had the one kid anyway as their finances are tight. Now they can continue to live in their small house which they love and plan for their retirement and a few extras. Just one more kid would have changed all that. She realized her system was not set up for pregnancy and dealt with it like an adult, her husband was sympathetic and it all worked out.

But they are not royals, there must be a spare. Imagine if Prince Ginger was the first one, right up in line to the throne. He can sigh a sigh of relief, he's down there. I like that guy, and can relate, having an older sister who thinks she is a princess.

Harry is a hawt ginger, isn't he? He grew up geeky and got hot with age...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

Quote
navi8orgirl
Harry is a hawt ginger, isn't he? He grew up geeky and got hot with age...

William on the other hand went through that process in reverse- going from this to this... larious

I'm about the same age as Our Wills and remember what a heartthrob he was and how people at my school would joke about growing up to marry him (one other girl about my age took this a bit far and did end up marrying him, of course)-what the hell happened? Another reason not to envy Kate right there.

Harry doesn't really do it for me (I love a hot ginge but he's no Damian Lewis) but he's ageing far better than his brother and is much better-looking than him now. As much as I loathe the Royal Family I have to grudgingly admire Harry for his inability to give one single solitary fuck. He's the lucky one- the one who doesn't have to work at being as safe and boring and inoffensive as possible to ensure the public will accept him as king, the one who can just laugh off naked pics while a paparazzo snapping his sister-in-law topless leads to a major diplomatic crisis, and the one who doesn't have to enter an arranged sham of a marriage, spawn and then spend the rest of his life (or the marriage) pretending it's all alright through a shit-eating grin for the cameras.

I agree that he must have got his personality and sense of humour from James Hewitt because he sure as hell didn't get them from Charlie Windsor.

For some reason, people chewed me out on FB when I put a status saying "so the spare is on its way. Because the world really needs another useless overprivileged asshole - there aren't enough of those already"

People thought that was harsh. "you can't say that about a baybee"!

Hopefully by the time Wills and Kate's brats are inheritance age, we'll be a Republic.

Quote
screaming sausage

Quote
navi8orgirl
Harry is a hawt ginger, isn't he? He grew up geeky and got hot with age...

William on the other hand went through that process in reverse- going from this to this... larious

I'm about the same age as Our Wills and remember what a heartthrob he was and how people at my school would joke about growing up to marry him (one other girl about my age took this a bit far and did end up marrying him, of course)-what the hell happened? Another reason not to envy Kate right there.

Harry doesn't really do it for me (I love a hot ginge but he's no Damian Lewis) but he's ageing far better than his brother and is much better-looking than him now. As much as I loathe the Royal Family I have to grudgingly admire Harry for his inability to give one single solitary fuck. He's the lucky one- the one who doesn't have to work at being as safe and boring and inoffensive as possible to ensure the public will accept him as king, the one who can just laugh off naked pics while a paparazzo snapping his sister-in-law topless leads to a major diplomatic crisis, and the one who doesn't have to enter an arranged sham of a marriage, spawn and then spend the rest of his life (or the marriage) pretending it's all alright through a shit-eating grin for the cameras.

I agree that he must have got his personality and sense of humour from James Hewitt because he sure as hell didn't get them from Charlie Windsor.

I am glad he looks like Diana's riding instructor side of the family. Wills looked like his mother as a teen but he is stuck with the unfortunate genetics of his father.

Harry is Prince Andrew....never going to have to worry about carrying the torch so he gets to live life on his own terms although hopefully he learned to do it smarter than his uncle.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

I used to think William was the hot one and that Harry looked like Napoleon Dynamite, but now that they're older I think Harry is definitely the better looking one.

Babby George looks like Donald Trump. Same hair, same mildly pissed-off expression, and in my head at least, they have the same walk.

Quote
navi8orgirl
Harry is Prince Andrew....never going to have to worry about carrying the torch so he gets to live life on his own terms

I'm not so sure about that- we still get bombarded with "will they/won't they" type stories claiming Harry is about to pop the question to his latest girlfriend. Now he's about to turn 30 there is some pressure to get him married off and get him using his ginger balls to produce a few grandHewitts, but he's still in a better position to tell the royal PR machine to fuck off and I hope he has the (ginger) balls to do so.

I couldn't give two flying shits about the British royal family but I;m on this thread merely to comment that those yawning pugs are just too damned adorable. Is there a smiley for 'SQUEEEEE SOOOO CUTE I WANNA SNUGGLE IT?"

Quote
rudeawakening
I used to think William was the hot one and that Harry looked like Napoleon Dynamite, but now that they're older I think Harry is definitely the better looking one.

Babby George looks like Donald Trump. Same hair, same mildly pissed-off expression, and in my head at least, they have the same walk.

His head has been unusually huge from the get-go. When I saw him right after he was born I felt very sorry for Kate's vaj. It's in her job description, though, so c'est la vie.

Quote
brattymcpants
I couldn't give two flying shits about the British royal family but I;m on this thread merely to comment that those yawning pugs are just too damned adorable. Is there a smiley for 'SQUEEEEE SOOOO CUTE I WANNA SNUGGLE IT?"

I :emoheart :emoheart :emoheart :emoheart pugs.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

Knocked up again...... Joy

Anddd, she's got it again. Kate's puking her guts out so she has been cancelling her royal duties. How dreadful, and takes horrible toll on the body. I'll bet it causes a significant amount of distress to the baking loaf too.

Quote
blondie
Anddd, she's got it again. Kate's puking her guts out so she has been cancelling her royal duties. How dreadful, and takes horrible toll on the body. I'll bet it causes a significant amount of distress to the baking loaf too.

Germaine Greer weighed in on this in an interview with Newsweek:

Quote

Germaine Greer, the queen of British feminist thinking, shares the general view: “Kate is a great deal more intelligent than the rest of the royals. She has been put in charge of William. She has a bastard of a job,” she says. But Greer feels sorry for the Duchess and identifies sinister undertones. “The girl is too thin. Meanwhile, she is vomiting her guts up and shouldn't have been made to go through all this again so soon. It’s not so much that she has to be a womb, but she has to be a mother. I would hope after this one she says, ‘That’s it. No more’.”

When I ask about specifically about feminism, Greer laughs. “Kate is not even allowed to decorate her own houses. Even the wives of the American presidents get to do that. The whole thing is a mad anachronism. The ‘firm’ tell us that the first born will now become the monarch regardless of sex. Well, big fucking deal! Kate is not allowed to have an interest in modern culture, even in art – to collect, to attend openings. She is made to appear absolutely anodyne. She cannot do or say anything spontaneous. She has learned what she has to do and say and how to do and say it in the approved way. Spontaneity will get her in trouble.”

Like Hilary Mantel before here she wasn't attacking the duchess herself but the royal machine around her for obliterating her personality and leaving her to function as nothing more than a walking incubator. She even called her intelligent... but as with Hilary Mantel before her, this whole episode has of course been painted as a "bitter ugly old childless feminist is jealous of pretty young fertile woman":

Inevitable Daily Fail Clickbait Link

Her comments on the health aspects just seem like common knowledge to me- it's widely known that women stop menstruating and become infertile if they drop below a certain body fat percentage,
most people know that pregnant women need to up their calorie intake and need fat to produce certain hormones in pregnancy, and thanks to the media coverage of Kate's first pregnancy people are now aware that HG isn't just bad morning sickness and can be fatal. If a doctor had made these comments about any other pregnant woman- say, Victoria Beckham or Katie Price- even the moos would be lowing in agreement, but because this is one of those Bloody Feminists commenting on The Sacred Royal Moo they're queuing up to defend the duchess' right to take on the job of Royal Brood Mare and risk killing herself by baking The Spare, and possibly a second Spare after that.

It amazes me that people can call Hilary Mantel and Germaine Greer "jealous" after everything they've achieved in their lives when Duchess Donothing has achieved little more than sweet FA with hers... and then I remember we live in a pro-natalist society in which being able to perform the basic biological function of spawning is considered a greater "achievement" than being a bestselling author, winning two Booker prizes or becoming one of the world's most successful academics and I understand where Kate's fawning fans are coming from when they post their breeder-brained comments.

Quote
screaming sausage
Her comments on the health aspects just seem like common knowledge to me- it's widely known that women stop menstruating and become infertile if they drop below a certain body fat percentage,
most people know that pregnant women need to up their calorie intake and need fat to produce certain hormones in pregnancy, and thanks to the media coverage of Kate's first pregnancy people are now aware that HG isn't just bad morning sickness and can be fatal. If a doctor had made these comments about any other pregnant woman- say, Victoria Beckham or Katie Price- even the moos would be lowing in agreement, but because this is one of those Bloody Feminists commenting on The Sacred Royal Moo they're queuing up to defend the duchess' right to take on the job of Royal Brood Mare and risk killing herself by baking The Spare, and possibly a second Spare after that.

It amazes me that people can call Hilary Mantel and Germaine Greer "jealous" after everything they've achieved in their lives when Duchess Donothing has achieved little more than sweet FA with hers... and then I remember we live in a pro-natalist society in which being able to perform the basic biological function of spawning is considered a greater "achievement" than being a bestselling author, winning two Booker prizes or becoming one of the world's most successful academics and I understand where Kate's fawning fans are coming from when they post their breeder-brained comments.

I dislike Kate because I find her, along with the Royal Famblee, boring, unappealing and utterly useless. I however don't see the point in criticizing her figure. In all honesty, people have lost the plot when it comes to what is a normal slim figure. I've seen women with several kids who are superskinny, I've seen superskinny inpig women, even fucking ballet dancers have kids! As we know it's not a miracle, and no you don't have to eat like a horse to 'fall' inpig.

Personally, I think Greer got it slightly wrong. She is right though about being concerned about Kate's health because it can't be good for you to vomit your guts out every day like that, but I can't see where she's coming from when calling Kate 'intelligent'.
I find it totally ridiculous and beyong stupid that people say Greer is 'jealous' of Kate, but I also dislike this feminist tendency of telling women off for being skinny.

There is no point in attacking Kate because she needs to toe the line if she wants to keep being Baldy's wife. The Royal Famblee needs to go the way of the dodo in its entirety, now that would be progress!

It's unfortunate that she came across as criticising her appearance as a feminist really shouldn't be criticising other women on those grounds, but I took her comments as being purely related to her health rather than her attractiveness. The comments on Greer's own appearance back up Lewis's Law: "Comments on any article about feminism justify feminism." I'm glad one commenter pointed out that Greer was a looker in her youth and that Kate will one day be old- it's hardly fair to compare a 75-year-old woman with a 32-year-old one on looks!

The speculation about Kate Middleton's weight stems in part from people knowing about Diana's unhappiness and eating disorders and how they were covered up for so long. Kate may be naturally slim and but she used to look a bit bigger and a lot healthier for it- look at this old pic where her legs are bigger but clearly all muscle- she's naturally strong and athletic, not naturally skinny. She lost a lot of weight right before the wedding and looked disturbingly thin in the photos, so there's a bit of a disturbing parallel emerging here. Of course she and Wills may actually be happy but with Charles and Diana's "fairytale wedding" turning out to be a sham I can't blame people for being cynical about this one.

I don't know about Kate being "intelligent" either. She has a degree in Art History but still had to ask if Faberge eggs were still in production... in any case, it's a shame to see someone waste a degree from St. Andrews when thousands of people who can't afford to go to university would kill for an opportunity like that. Being an academic, maybe that's how Germaine Greer feels about the situation too!

The official "heartwarming festive pics" of Royal Sprog #1 have been released:



Well, he's definitely inherited the Windsor hairline larious Balding at one year old, I almost feel a tiny tiny tiny bit sorry for the privileged little shitbag.

god I hate it when another royal is in pig, last time it happened, I didn't have a tv, didn't listen to radio, didn't read magizines or newspapers and never was the one to bring it up, yet I still heard way to much about it, I don't even know which princess is preggers, but I don't care.

point is that even without all those things actively in my life, everywhere I go, I will have posters, news reels, magazine racks, and clucky moos chirping all over the place about it till they run out of oxygen.

Im suddenly very happy I was excommunicated from my family, because if I wasn't, i'd have my mum trying to bring it up into conversation every time I talk or see her, probly in hopes of god only knows making me wish I had her attention for babys cast onto me? noooo thank you.

Quote
exile
god I hate it when another royal is in pig, last time it happened, I didn't have a tv, didn't listen to radio, didn't read magizines or newspapers and never was the one to bring it up, yet I still heard way to much about it, I don't even know which princess is preggers, but I don't care.

The thing is, despite what the world's newspaper editors, media moguls seem to think, a lot of us really don't care and get sick of the constant coverage of royal pregnancies/births/weddings etc. When Donothing married Baldy I decided to take advantage of the nice empty roads by going for a very long bike ride, and found that plenty of other people had made similar plans. Cycling along the Thames path I saw a lot of couples sitting on the riverbank with bottles of wine, picnics etc, having a nice romantic day out of their own away from the phoney arranged nuptials the BBC were trying to beam into their homes- it was really quite heartwarming.

Just before the wedding I suggested to some friends that we go on a royal wedding avoidance holiday and book a budget weekend break, but when we looked up the prices of easyJet's flights that weekend they seemed much higher than normal. A lot of flights were already close to selling out and we figured that a lot of people had had the same idea before us!

I suspect it isn't just a few CF types like us and anti-royalists who get sick of the coverage, and that a surprising proportion of people don't give a fuck. Now I live in Scotland and here I suspect it's at least 45% of the population

No matter what country it is, the world makes way too much about royals. I remember the much fluttering about when Princess Aiko of Japan was born and what that would mean for the Chrysanthemum Throne if no male heir was born (and the stress sending Crown Princess Masako to the hospital).

------------------------------------------------------------
"Why children take so long to grow? They eat and drink like pig and give nothing back. Must find way to accelerate process..."
- Dr. Yi Suchong, Bioshock

"Society does not need more children; but it does need more loved children. Quite literally, we cannot afford unloved children - but we pay heavily for them every day. There should not be the slightest communal concern when a woman elects to destroy the life of her thousandth-of-an-ounce embryo. But all society should rise up in alarm when it hears that a baby that is not wanted is about to be born."
- Garrett Hardin

"I feel like there's a message involved here somehow, but then I couldn't stop laughing at all the plotholes, like the part when North Korea has food."
- Youtube commentor referring to a North Korean cartoon.

"Reality is a bitch when it slowly crawls out of your vagina and shits in your lap."
- Reddit comment

"Bitch wants a baby, so we're gonna fuck now. #bareback"
- Cambion

Oh whatever. Abortion doctors are crimestoppers."
- Miss Hannigan

In addition to Donothing and Baldy, Princess Charlene of Monaco has just sluiced the heir and the spare at once and the royal twins are about to be "unvelied to the public" soon. I'd feel sorry for the people of Monaco if they didn't have their yachts and racing teams to keep them distracted.

I always thought the main thing that attracted Kate to William was her absolute desperation to be queen, but check out Charlene and Prince Albert here:





No doubt she was attracted to his film star looks and buff body- nope, I can't think of another reason... People who worship the royals and their fake fairytale marriages may as well worship the likes of Hugh Hefner, Bernie Ecclestone and Howard Marshall Jr.

Charlene looks absolutely fucking miserable. As for Albert, he's not that bad. He's an average looking guy, definitely wouldn't call him ugly. Speaking frankly, I'd marry that if I could be princess, fuck it. Except for the breeding part of course. Marry the spare, that's the ticket.

Quote
screaming sausage
The official "heartwarming festive pics" of Royal Sprog #1 have been released:

64618.jpg

Well, he's definitely inherited the Windsor hairline larious Balding at one year old, I almost feel a tiny tiny tiny bit sorry for the privileged little shitbag.

I stand by my previous assertion.

Quote
rudeawakening

Quote
screaming sausage
The official "heartwarming festive pics" of Royal Sprog #1 have been released:

64618.jpg

Well, he's definitely inherited the Windsor hairline larious Balding at one year old, I almost feel a tiny tiny tiny bit sorry for the privileged little shitbag.

I stand by my previous assertion.

larious