Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 17, 2014 | Registered: 15 years ago Posts: 6,607 |
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Q. My Son Can’t Keep His Hands Off Himself: I am a single mother with a 14-year-old son. I knew this time was coming but now I fear I am close to my wit’s end. I have seen evidence in his bedroom, the laundry room, and the kitchen. I know this is normal, but how much is too much? Things escalated last week when his hockey coach called me in for a conference. I have noticed my son has been taking a lot of penalties this season. It turns out he has been intentionally going to the penalty box to pleasure himself. I lashed out at him when about this and things have been awkward around the house this weekend. Am I overreacting? I know I have to talk about this with him in a calm setting, but I always find the thought of this type of discussion horrifying. I am losing sleep and I don’t want to succumb to letting his father deal with this, but what should I do?
A: First, watch the coming of age movie, The Squid and the Whale, then read Portnoy’s Complaint for some background on teenage boys wanking their way through these difficult years. The evidence in the sheets and towels is normal, and I don’t want to know what your son is doing to the groceries. Playing sports is tense, but what’s not normal is for him to forfeit the game in order to relieve some of the pressure. It’s also not normal that you are undone at the thought of having a serious talk with your boy, and that there’s something so wrong with your ex (or your son’s relationship with him) that the idea of a father-son talk is worse. Lashing out at a 14-year-old because he’s displaying troubling symptoms does not speak well for you, Mom. You need to apologize to your son, tell him this is a very hard conversation for you two to have, but you are concerned that he is not understanding the boundaries between public and private behavior. Say you know you aren’t good at talking about these things, and neither is his father, so you’re going to find him someone who is. Your son should see a male therapist—he needs intervention with someone who can be a trusted, calm, helpful adult.
Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 17, 2014 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 1,367 |
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Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 17, 2014 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 5,716 |
Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 17, 2014 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 1,735 |
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Zzelda
I was not a 'horny teen'. Yeah maybe people will say it's because you're a female - but - I did know plenty of girls at the time who were raging horny. Esp. The Catholic School Girls. Which leads me to think that some of this stuff is psychological.
I spent the years of 16 - 21 getting an Engineering degree. That's a load of work and I didn't have much time for 'fun'. But on the other side of the coin I sure did go out enough, and had BFs and everything. We would hang out more in groups. Aren't these Young WhipperSnappers these days interested in drinking and drugs?
Most of my friends of youth were also in school, neither sex nor romance was high on the agenda, 'doing things' also - like road trips to Various Urban Areas to try to get into clubs, the constant quest for dive bars where the underaged could drink - yanno - Cultural Activities such as these
The kids these days. Sigh.
Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 17, 2014 | Registered: 11 years ago Posts: 1,706 |
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Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 17, 2014 |
Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 18, 2014 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 1,841 |
Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 18, 2014 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 12,033 |
Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 18, 2014 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 1,367 |
Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 18, 2014 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 5,716 |
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Miss_Hannigan
Hey, the jerking-off-in-the-penalty-box incident is straight from Paul Newman's hockey movie, "Slap Shot." (One of the funniest films ever, IMHO) Are we sure this isn't a goof letter?
McGrath: Reg, Reg, that reminds me. I was coachin' in Omaha in 1948 and Eddie Shore sends me this guy who was a terrible masturbator, you know, couldn't control himself. Why, he would get deliberate penalties so he could get over in the penalty box all by himself and damned if he wouldn't... you know...
Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 20, 2014 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 135 |
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Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 21, 2014 | Registered: 15 years ago Posts: 1,109 |
Umm... what is he going to do with a girlfriend when he hasn't even got a sense of decency about handling himself yet? I'm glad he hasn't got one.Quote
some-childfree-guy
Sadly, I'm not too sure this is a prank. Moo sounds like one of those fundie "GAWD WILL SEND YOU TO HAY-ULL FOR TOUCHING YOURSELF," types that won't let Fapford have a girlfriend because jeezus hates that or something. But on the other hand, Fapford here is a fucking repressed creep in the making. First it's hockey penalty boxes, next thing you know, he's going all Shinji Ikari over comatose girls.
Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 21, 2014 | Registered: 16 years ago Posts: 3,454 |
Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 21, 2014 | Registered: 16 years ago Posts: 3,454 |
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blondie
Kid needs boundaries. Fappin rules. Weird how little embarrasses them anymore.
Funny, when I was a teen I had no idea all this was going on. I had only grown up with girls and no idea about uber horny fap boys except for their jokes.
Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 21, 2014 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 135 |
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Presto
Umm... what is he going to do with a girlfriend when he hasn't even got a sense of decency about handling himself yet? I'm glad he hasn't got one.
I agree that religious nut mommies can make the problem worse, but he does not need a girl around that he would more than likely want to treat as a sex toy.
I say this from experience. I came from religious nuts that thought masturbation was the sin next to murder and allowed the bishop to question us, boys and girls alike, about masturbation specifically twice a year.
I got a non religious boyfriend in high school, hoping to somehow figure out "normal" life... little did I know he was fucked up in his own right, thought masturbation was wrong, and insisted on using me for "relief".
So yeah, I take issue with suggesting he needs a girlfriend when he can't even responsibly use a tissue and trash, or socks and laundry.
Re: Dear Prudence: Help! My son is an über fapper! :lips October 21, 2014 | Registered: 15 years ago Posts: 6,607 |
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some-childfree-guy
Fapford
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