I wouldn't call that equally lucky!

I'm reading someone's blog that is posting adoption stories in honor of this month being Adoption Awareness. I'm not adopted and just reading them out curiosity. In one of the stories submitted by a guest, the guest talks about her adopted child and her sister's two adopted children. Part of what the guest said about her sister is obnoxious and left me feeling annoyed.

Quote
So, are they lucky to have her? Yes, you bet they are, and she is equally as lucky to have them, for they have brought tiny, constantly-under-your-feet Lego pieces, and scary, speedy skateboards and loud, colorful Disney movies into what was once a too routine and quiet life.

Translation: I miss my old too routine and quiet life before kids. Now you can miss yours with me, sis!

http://www.chicagonow.com/portrait-of-an-adoption/2014/11/is-your-adopted-child-lucky-a-tricky-topic-in-adoption-circles/

The implication that one's life without kids is "too routine" is an erroneous one. One of the things I love about my CF life is that it doesn't have to be routine. I can spontaneously do things during the day or night without having to worry about or arrange chyyyld care and I don't have to (doG Forbid!) drag a kid with me. I can vacation during the Skewl Year without a major hassle.

If anything, having kids means you are tied to a routine: Snotleigh's school, Snotleigh's bedtime, Snotleigh's need for meals, overseeing Snotleigh's homework, Snotleigh's schedule.

And my life doesn't need to be completed by watching "loud Disney movies," in fact I count myself lucky that I can see what I want to see and not have to listen to Dora the Explorer.

If you need kids to make yourself "have a life" you were a pretty boring person to begin with.

Quote
bell_flower
If you need kids to make yourself "have a life" you were a pretty boring person to begin with.

Totally. Since I hear the argument of "my life was so boring/empty/pointless before kids!!!" so frequently, it makes me think that most people are really farking boring to begin with. Then I go visit my famblee members with sprogs and can't spend more than a couple of days with them before losing my mind - I don't know how they do the brat raising thing for 18+ years. They can keep their legos, Diznee films, and other assorted kindercrap. My routine and quiet life helps me to stay SANE, but I don't have to give up my hobbies, travel and other interests.

The thing is, we assume that having a life is positive. When I realized that having a life meant "I'm going to be monotonous and boring", I dropped the lifescript. I love that I'm doing something DIFFERENT by leading the lifestyle I chose.

Honestly, I'm getting to cherish more and more my CF very quiet and "boring" life! Ha! I prefer quiet peacefulness to clutter and noise all around. Plus, having them color on my walls and drop toys everywhere for me to trip up on makes me shudder. I could not fathom a child always pestering me and demanding this and that.... And decades of it would be intolerable. I think life is WAY too short to take care of a child a good deal of it. Maybe if our life span was, say, at least 500 to 1000 years, then devoting a much lesser portion of it to dealing with them might be worth it.....a pretty big MIGHT.

If your life is "too boring/too routine" without kids, you're doing it wrong.

I feel the same way about the "I never knew love before I had kids" line. What, really?

Routine CF life is just fine for me. I keep it routine because that's the way I like it. If there was something I did not like about it, I'd change it, I don't have to ask anyone for permission.

People say what they say about adopted kids, because just like own's fuck trophies, they are there to stay. One has to keep reminding themselves how "boring" CF life was because they can't have it back. A CF person can have a childed life anytime they want to. They don't have anything to prove to anyone.

My life is quiet and routine when and if I want it to be. Sometimes not so much, but it is my choice how I want it and the type of things I want to do to make it interesting. They have never included Disney movies. I do find some people get into a rut but it doesn't have much to do with having kids or not. There is always something new to learn and do. I am always finding new foods, new music, interests, hobbies if I want to seek them out and have friends that introduce me to new things. With no regard for the Life Script there are no limits and I don't really set age restrictions on things I like. My old skateboard still gets use. Not by a kid. I hate whiners like child-LESS types and old fuddy-duddys who say they are too old to do this and are bored and boring. It's a shameful waste. The older I get the more I desire to challenge myself because time is more limited.

There is not enough time in a CF lifetime to get to it all. But then I am not lazy and don't expect anyone else to be responsible for my life and whether I am bored or not. I can't imagine putting that on a little kid.

Besides being CF, I have also been retired for the last 6 years (I am 51 now). It's a great combination, not being tied to a job or kids. I can come and go as I please, doing pretty much whatever I want whenever I want. Pure personal and economic freedom.

(spam code=vxFKU gotta like it, huh?)

Quote
deegee
Besides being CF, I have also been retired for the last 6 years (I am 51 now). It's a great combination, not being tied to a job or kids. I can come and go as I please, doing pretty much whatever I want whenever I want. Pure personal and economic freedom.

(spam code=vxFKU gotta like it, huh?)

Congrats. Being able to retire that young is quite an achievement. wink Just think, you are retired and some people your age still have little kids, are even starting famblees or taking care of slacker kyds and grandbrats. Just starting, and they still have to work to support all of them, sometimes more than one job, at a time they may be getting displaced by younger employees. Joy for all the stress, worry and chaos. Oh, but they aren't bored, like those young retirees. LOL.

My life may be routine but it is far from boring. That said what really confuses me is they seem to think they need kids as an excuse to watch Disney movies. It's a movie you don't need an excuse just watch the damn thing if you want to. Are they that insecure about whether or not people see them as "adults"?

Quote
starvingauthor
My life may be routine but it is far from boring. That said what really confuses me is they seem to think they need kids as an excuse to watch Disney movies. It's a movie you don't need an excuse just watch the damn thing if you want to. Are they that insecure about whether or not people see them as "adults"?

See, the great thing about not having kids is that if I want to watch a Disney movie, I can go watch a fucking Disney movie. But, I can wait after the hype has died down some and go see a late showing or just wait until it comes out on DVD or Netflix. It's been a year and I have yet to see Frozen. I'm okay with that. If I had a young girlchild, though, I probably would have seen it a fair few times at this point and have been relegated to going to a Saturday afternoon matinee with a hundred other kids and their shitty parents.

My mother is in her 60s and if you look at her DVR, it's mostly X-Men, Spider-Man, Johnny Quest, Batman, and other cartoons. Some Masterpiece Mystery and crappy SyFy/Chiller TV movies to round it out, but the woman loves her cartoons. I not only look exactly like her, but I get my love for cartoons, British television, and shitty horror from her as well.

------------------------------------------------------------
"Why children take so long to grow? They eat and drink like pig and give nothing back. Must find way to accelerate process..."
- Dr. Yi Suchong, Bioshock

"Society does not need more children; but it does need more loved children. Quite literally, we cannot afford unloved children - but we pay heavily for them every day. There should not be the slightest communal concern when a woman elects to destroy the life of her thousandth-of-an-ounce embryo. But all society should rise up in alarm when it hears that a baby that is not wanted is about to be born."
- Garrett Hardin

"I feel like there's a message involved here somehow, but then I couldn't stop laughing at all the plotholes, like the part when North Korea has food."
- Youtube commentor referring to a North Korean cartoon.

"Reality is a bitch when it slowly crawls out of your vagina and shits in your lap."
- Reddit comment

"Bitch wants a baby, so we're gonna fuck now. #bareback"
- Cambion

Oh whatever. Abortion doctors are crimestoppers."
- Miss Hannigan

Quote
paragon schnitzophonic

Quote
starvingauthor
My life may be routine but it is far from boring. That said what really confuses me is they seem to think they need kids as an excuse to watch Disney movies. It's a movie you don't need an excuse just watch the damn thing if you want to. Are they that insecure about whether or not people see them as "adults"?

See, the great thing about not having kids is that if I want to watch a Disney movie, I can go watch a fucking Disney movie. But, I can wait after the hype has died down some and go see a late showing or just wait until it comes out on DVD or Netflix. It's been a year and I have yet to see Frozen. I'm okay with that. If I had a young girlchild, though, I probably would have seen it a fair few times at this point and have been relegated to going to a Saturday afternoon matinee with a hundred other kids and their shitty parents.

My mother is in her 60s and if you look at her DVR, it's mostly X-Men, Spider-Man, Johnny Quest, Batman, and other cartoons. Some Masterpiece Mystery and crappy SyFy/Chiller TV movies to round it out, but the woman loves her cartoons. I not only look exactly like her, but I get my love for cartoons, British television, and shitty horror from her as well.

Cool. I also don't get what's stopping them from watching Disney movies or having legos if they didn't have kids. What, do they think they are a closet pedophile? I'm sure they think we are if we like that stuff, that is why "unaccompanied" adults get pushed out of lego land and probably Disney movies next.

I had recently posted about moos who expected me to provide Halloween entertainment for their brats because I had a creepy decorated room in my house. Because it couldn't be for me. I had a rockin' party that was anything but quiet and routine and NO kids were there, imagine that, who knew it was possible.

Not having kids has opened many doors for me. At my first job there was a problem at one of our rigs in Kazakstan and an engineer was needed to go trouble shoot it. I'm in this meeting with my boss and they are arguing over who to send, kids and family you know. Being the new guy I timidly speak up and say I have a bag packed with my passport and can leave immediately. I was essentially told to shut up and I was full of shit. Another two hours goes by of unproductive bickering. I had already texted my secretary to get plane tickets, rental car, visa and hotel lined up. Finally my boss turns to me and says 'Can you really go??' That's when I tell him all the arrangements are already made. He looks at me and says "you can't be serious". I stood up, walked out to my office, returned and threw my two suiter, passport and travel documents on the conference room table and replied "like a fucking heart attack..."

In the twenty years since I have left on an emergency business trip more times than I can count. At first the breeders were pretty smug, seeing as how I 'got stuck with all the shit jobs '. Then they started noticing my level of expertise was at a whole other level compared to theirs, I was regularly receiving promotions, my salary was way above theirs. Suddenly they weren't so smug any more...


I recently rediscovered Legos. As a kid I had a bunch of mismatched sets acquired at thrift stores. We weren't too well off when I was growing up. I saw a commercial for some of the new stuff they have brought to market . I now have three of their heavy equipment pieces in my office. At first some of the bean counters made fun of it. Wasn't long before the other engineers found out and soon i had a pretty steady stream of people stopping by at coffee break to shoot the bull and play with Legos...