May I Throw Up Now? (What Moo Wants U.S. Companies to know about Moo Leave)

Link

Please may I? oh too late....BARF.
And why does this stuff keep coming up on my search engines when that is not what I was searching for? Why is this "news", or should I say "new-news"? gag me.
Where is the App to prevent self-aggrandizing mombies with their baby-related newsy-news?

And....

Waaah, waaah, waaah, I want employers to pay me to sit around and not work for an extended arbitrary amount of time of my choosing for doing nothing more than spreading my legs like a common whore and not using birth control. Why should I save up money and wait to have a baby until I can take time off without needing outside forces to pay for my life choices? I should be able to have a baby NOW and it's everybody else's responsibility to do the work I leave without any extra pay, take smaller compensation packages and no/reduced raises because the money for these paid extended maternity leaves have to come from somewhere, and I'll happily ignore the tired faces of my overworked colleagues as I visit twice a week with my infant in tow.

Oh, and sure I'll return, but I'll be coming in late and leaving early and get very little done. Any attempt to rebuke me will have me running to HR and/or the media on tenuous claims of discrimination. I will make special demands for breastfeeding that will disrupt the workplace and annoy everybody.

I'll repeat this at least two more times in quick succession so my employer is paying more to not work than for any actual work out of me and then I'll quit in the worst way possible: by running out the paid maternity leave and then not returning. I won't give any notice, either, so now whoever has been doing my work for free has to do it longer until they hire a new person for my position (if they bother to do so. Maybe they won't, since they have this new paid maternity leave and all. No free lunch and all).

And I won't give two shits about the far-reaching implications of all this, not until it affects me and any girlchildren I have once they grow up: that companies will simply not hire women, except in overly simplistic positions that a semi-frequent turnover rate won't matter, like secretarial. All these current efforts to get girls into STEM careers will be for naught because it would be too risky to have women of childbearing age in specialized roles.

When I decide to return to the workforce and/or when my daughters are entering and there's no work for us and we learn of the sexism because of the shit I demand, I will start screeching about the unfairness without any self-awarness.

Oh, and if at any point during my initial time in the workforce I face any real problems that requires time off, I'll freak out about not having extended paid time off and I'll harass all my colleagues to no end to get them to donate their vacation and sick leave to me.

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"Why children take so long to grow? They eat and drink like pig and give nothing back. Must find way to accelerate process..."
- Dr. Yi Suchong, Bioshock

"Society does not need more children; but it does need more loved children. Quite literally, we cannot afford unloved children - but we pay heavily for them every day. There should not be the slightest communal concern when a woman elects to destroy the life of her thousandth-of-an-ounce embryo. But all society should rise up in alarm when it hears that a baby that is not wanted is about to be born."
- Garrett Hardin

"I feel like there's a message involved here somehow, but then I couldn't stop laughing at all the plotholes, like the part when North Korea has food."
- Youtube commentor referring to a North Korean cartoon.

"Reality is a bitch when it slowly crawls out of your vagina and shits in your lap."
- Reddit comment

"Bitch wants a baby, so we're gonna fuck now. #bareback"
- Cambion

Oh whatever. Abortion doctors are crimestoppers."
- Miss Hannigan

Pathetic attention-whoring moos everywhere! Yeah, I'm a feminist, and I believe feminism stands for equal rights AS WELL AS responsibilities for everyone. Sucks when some femoonist tries to dodge the duties or responsibilities part

Paragon schizophrenic. I would give you the internet if I had it. 100 points to Gryffindor.

Agree with Catharsist, that was pretty epic Paragon.

I don't understand why people have no problem with the idea of saving up for a vacation or a new car but when you mention they should save up for parenthood they get all pissy.

:bawl
But...but when I'm home my cat snuggles with me in my lap and purrs and gives me little kitty licks on my forehead! It's so hard to leave him and go to work! Corporate America just doesn't understand the bond between me and my cat! My cat needs me there to watch him sleep like a lump for most of the day! What kind of horrible society is this where no one will pay me to sit at home and enjoy my cat!!!!!

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stillwaters
:bawl
But...but when I'm home my cat snuggles with me in my lap and purrs and gives me little kitty licks on my forehead! It's so hard to leave him and go to work! Corporate America just doesn't understand the bond between me and my cat! My cat needs me there to watch him sleep like a lump for most of the day! What kind of horrible society is this where no one will pay me to sit at home and enjoy my cat!!!!!

THIS! larious

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“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.”

Can't believe some of the fuckwit comments on that site, this one is really loaded:

"Someone has to have children, or all the elderly folks that will be around in 50 years will have nobody to care for them."

Maybe it's just sheer coincidence, but I recently finished reading a bio on 1920's - 1940's actor Tom Tyler, he never had any children, when he was ill and dying from scleroderma his sister took care of him.

If I hear one more "children exist to take care of their parents" BS I will upchuck.

I don't understand why these people feel entitled to receive pay for work they did not perform, but I could live with the idea of 6-8 weeks' paid personal time (for men and women) IF it was offered to every employee under the same conditions, not just breeders. It should be spread or so you can only renew it every few years, so no shitting out one kid after the other and taking three Moo leaves in three years.

What REALLY baffles me are the people who whine that breeders should get "at least 6 months/a year/whatever" (paid or not) each time they shit a loaf. There is NO reason for this...the CF also have things outside work to attend to, that might be very important to them, but no one wants to give them that much time off. That should only be allowed for serious health issues that prevent one from working—which breeding is NOT.

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paragon schnitzophonic
Waaah, waaah, waaah, I want employers to pay me to sit around and not work for an extended arbitrary amount of time of my choosing for doing nothing more than spreading my legs like a common whore and not using birth control. Why should I save up money and wait to have a baby until I can take time off without needing outside forces to pay for my life choices? I should be able to have a baby NOW and it's everybody else's responsibility to do the work I leave without any extra pay, take smaller compensation packages and no/reduced raises because the money for these paid extended maternity leaves have to come from somewhere, and I'll happily ignore the tired faces of my overworked colleagues as I visit twice a week with my infant in tow.

Oh, and sure I'll return, but I'll be coming in late and leaving early and get very little done. Any attempt to rebuke me will have me running to HR and/or the media on tenuous claims of discrimination. I will make special demands for breastfeeding that will disrupt the workplace and annoy everybody.

I'll repeat this at least two more times in quick succession so my employer is paying more to not work than for any actual work out of me and then I'll quit in the worst way possible: by running out the paid maternity leave and then not returning. I won't give any notice, either, so now whoever has been doing my work for free has to do it longer until they hire a new person for my position (if they bother to do so. Maybe they won't, since they have this new paid maternity leave and all. No free lunch and all).

And I won't give two shits about the far-reaching implications of all this, not until it affects me and any girlchildren I have once they grow up: that companies will simply not hire women, except in overly simplistic positions that a semi-frequent turnover rate won't matter, like secretarial. All these current efforts to get girls into STEM careers will be for naught because it would be too risky to have women of childbearing age in specialized roles.

When I decide to return to the workforce and/or when my daughters are entering and there's no work for us and we learn of the sexism because of the shit I demand, I will start screeching about the unfairness without any self-awarness.

Oh, and if at any point during my initial time in the workforce I face any real problems that requires time off, I'll freak out about not having extended paid time off and I'll harass all my colleagues to no end to get them to donate their vacation and sick leave to me.

STANDING OVATION

Paragon,

hankyou

:yr

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"I have found little that is 'good' about human beings on the whole. In my experience most of them are trash, no matter whether they publicly subscribe to this or that ethical doctrine or to none at all."
~Sigmund Freud

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selidororous
If I hear one more "children exist to take care of their parents" BS I will upchuck.

Do these people not understand that this is an increasingly mobile society, where jobs may take you across the continent... or even to other countries?

Article leads with a photo of a tired woman and her baybee whose soulless eyes creep me out.

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A new mother with an infant is caught in a vortex between uncontrollable love and utter despair.

Well that sounds healthy.

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They start to smile and respond, hold their heads up in pictures and wear JEANS!! It is just too stinkin' cute.

I know a couple fully grown humans who do this really well and definitely out-cute any crotchnugget. Seriously, why contribute to overpopulation when you can get a one-time-cost realistic babydoll? I mean, seriously. If you have a thing for tiny human clothes and soulless eyes, get a doll! There are ones with computer chips if you also never want to sleep again, but that is optional. And you don't have to pay for new clothes for every growth spurt and it will never hate you.

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a few hours at a time. I know that sounds harsh ladies, but trust me -- you'll see. This dude is into everything. If I try to ingest any type of nourishment, he insists I share it with him, no matter how many second breakfasts he's had. And he is always trying to mess with my coffee -- which is just cruel.

It's called parenting because you are supposed to teacht the tiny feral human that they aren't allowed to do this shit.

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And because he is learning how to speak, he thinks we should all understand exactly what he is saying and if we don't, he shrieks at a very high volume.

Hell no.

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Just ask Google, because when they decided to extended their maternity leave for new mothers to five months and made it paid, what do you think happened? That's right, more women started coming back after maternity leave.

The article says nothing of what it wants the rest of the workers to do: pick up the slack, I guess?

Paragon: up :yr

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stillwaters
:bawl
But...but when I'm home my cat snuggles with me in my lap and purrs and gives me little kitty licks on my forehead! It's so hard to leave him and go to work! Corporate America just doesn't understand the bond between me and my cat! My cat needs me there to watch him sleep like a lump for most of the day! What kind of horrible society is this where no one will pay me to sit at home and enjoy my cat!!!!!

I'm all for caternity leave!

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rudeawakening
I don't understand why these people feel entitled to receive pay for work they did not perform, but I could live with the idea of 6-8 weeks' paid personal time (for men and women) IF it was offered to every employee under the same conditions, not just breeders. It should be spread or so you can only renew it every few years, so no shitting out one kid after the other and taking three Moo leaves in three years.

I agree totally. Give people paid time off each year and they can decide why, when and how to use it, either all together or a week at a time or a day here and there, regardless of gender. If they want to use that time to sluice, fine. What makes breeders so fuckin' special that they can have several weeks of paid time off for a completely voluntary and personal choice? Some people struggle to get time off to recover from injury or necessary surgery (and still get refused), but Cunttina McHerpes can have months off because she got passed-out drunk and fucked by some guy whose face she never even saw?

I think if Moos want exclusive calving time off, they should have to re-interview for their job if they want to come back. Make them tell management why they deserve the job more than someone without kids who can make work a priority. Fuck Moos - they make all women look bad and employers have no choice but to assume all women are flaky and will go on maternity leave the second they get hired, meaning women are less likely to get hired at all.

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stillwaters
:bawl
But...but when I'm home my cat snuggles with me in my lap and purrs and gives me little kitty licks on my forehead! It's so hard to leave him and go to work! Corporate America just doesn't understand the bond between me and my cat! My cat needs me there to watch him sleep like a lump for most of the day! What kind of horrible society is this where no one will pay me to sit at home and enjoy my cat!!!!!

larious

Yes! And if I'm not home, who will throw wads of paper for my cat to fetch before she decides it's time to pass out on the couch for hours on end??

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Cats_Galore
Where is the App to prevent self-aggrandizing mombies with their baby-related newsy-news?

Most search engines data mine for advertizing and other purposes. They will give you more breeder crap if you search for breeder crap. Here are few that do not:

https://www.ixquick.com/

https://duckduckgo.com/

https://startpage.com/

Also, clear your browser of cookies and site data frequently or always browse in "private" mode. Use Chrome or Firefox if you can.