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Modern breeders vs parents of the past
Posted by Anonymous User
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Modern breeders vs parents of the past July 30, 2015 |
My grandmother had 9 children.
She loved reading books, playing the piano, making flower compositions, singing, playing cards with friend. And she kept doing those things despite 8 children.
She never once in her life has said something like "being a mother is so hard" or "they should make me a statue" or "my children are perfect" or "I don't have time". She never once thought that she had to abandon her friends and interest and 100% obsess about being a mother, buying useless things to their children and make every conversation 100% about their kids and their perfection.
Then what's so wrong with today breeders if even after just 1 ONE child they feel entitled to: abandon their friends, claim to have no free time, making children the only topic of their conversation, showing millions of children pictures to everyone, whine about how expensive having a child is because of all the spongebob/frozen/child-safery mafia/disney channel cable stuff you HAVE to buy, expect everyone to play with their children for hours as if they were paid babysitters, change completely attitude/beliefs/interests because of the child.
My grandmother herself said "people try too hard today and them make a lot of mistakes as parents, they shoud avoid having children".
And again this shows to me that it's not something about breeders that makes them obnoxious and boring but about todays breeders and their pretensious culture, to the point that even the grandmothers criticize all the fuss they make about parenting.
She loved reading books, playing the piano, making flower compositions, singing, playing cards with friend. And she kept doing those things despite 8 children.
She never once in her life has said something like "being a mother is so hard" or "they should make me a statue" or "my children are perfect" or "I don't have time". She never once thought that she had to abandon her friends and interest and 100% obsess about being a mother, buying useless things to their children and make every conversation 100% about their kids and their perfection.
Then what's so wrong with today breeders if even after just 1 ONE child they feel entitled to: abandon their friends, claim to have no free time, making children the only topic of their conversation, showing millions of children pictures to everyone, whine about how expensive having a child is because of all the spongebob/frozen/child-safery mafia/disney channel cable stuff you HAVE to buy, expect everyone to play with their children for hours as if they were paid babysitters, change completely attitude/beliefs/interests because of the child.
My grandmother herself said "people try too hard today and them make a lot of mistakes as parents, they shoud avoid having children".
And again this shows to me that it's not something about breeders that makes them obnoxious and boring but about todays breeders and their pretensious culture, to the point that even the grandmothers criticize all the fuss they make about parenting.
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past July 31, 2015 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 951 |
That's an interesting topic.
I think that the main issue is that chyldren were
a part of life in the past, today they
are the centre of life.
I don't know what and why it changed.
I also think that people used to be smarter
in the past. Now, we have the first generation
of Idiocracy as parunts.
I know breeders who have one chyld and act as if
they had 10.
I know breeders you cannot talk to because any kind
of conversation leads to chyyyyyld.
I know breeders who openly despise me for being CF.
I know breeders who think I don't deserve any money
because I am CF.
I think I've already seen it all.
I think that the main issue is that chyldren were
a part of life in the past, today they
are the centre of life.
I don't know what and why it changed.
I also think that people used to be smarter
in the past. Now, we have the first generation
of Idiocracy as parunts.
I know breeders who have one chyld and act as if
they had 10.
I know breeders you cannot talk to because any kind
of conversation leads to chyyyyyld.
I know breeders who openly despise me for being CF.
I know breeders who think I don't deserve any money
because I am CF.
I think I've already seen it all.
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past July 31, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 1,603 |
Quote
mrs. chinaski
That's an interesting topic.
I think that the main issue is that chyldren were
a part of life in the past, today they
are the centre of life.
I don't know what and why it changed.
I also think that people used to be smarter
in the past. Now, we have the first generation
of Idiocracy as parunts.
I know breeders who have one chyld and act as if
they had 10.
I know breeders you cannot talk to because any kind
of conversation leads to chyyyyyld.
I know breeders who openly despise me for being CF.
I know breeders who think I don't deserve any money
because I am CF.
I think I've already seen it all.
I think it goes along with the rise of narcissism in our society. With more people being narcissistic, more parents will be too. There have been discussions of narcissistic parents in other threads and it used to be those kind were few and far between, now they are commonplace. Narcissistic parents don't think the kid is an individual, they think the kid is an extension of themselves and exists primarily to meet the needs of the parents and the kid's needs don't matter. The kid has to be in loads of activities and have tons of trophies, awards, etc., so the parents can brag and be proud. Who cares if the kid just wants to be a kid?
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past July 31, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 3,003 |
Over the most recent decades, it seems like the former kids who grew up and became later became parents have deeply resented any and all discipline and restrictions that they had experienced as kids growing up.
Somehow, the deeper meaning and reasons for such restrictions (ie creating a functioning, participating, independent adult) completely escaped the latest generations of parents.
The few parents who did get the macro message of raising kids properly took the theme to an extreme degree and let the kids become the obsessive centre of everything.
Overall, very few parents that I have encountered seem to be raising their kids in a balanced manner with the right amount and type of parenting.
Somehow, the deeper meaning and reasons for such restrictions (ie creating a functioning, participating, independent adult) completely escaped the latest generations of parents.
The few parents who did get the macro message of raising kids properly took the theme to an extreme degree and let the kids become the obsessive centre of everything.
Overall, very few parents that I have encountered seem to be raising their kids in a balanced manner with the right amount and type of parenting.
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past July 31, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,308 |
Quote
JohnDrake
I think it goes along with the rise of narcissism in our society. With more people being narcissistic, more parents will be too. There have been discussions of narcissistic parents in other threads and it used to be those kind were few and far between, now they are commonplace. Narcissistic parents don't think the kid is an individual, they think the kid is an extension of themselves and exists primarily to meet the needs of the parents and the kid's needs don't matter. The kid has to be in loads of activities and have tons of trophies, awards, etc., so the parents can brag and be proud. Who cares if the kid just wants to be a kid?
Interesting. I was talking to a parent who told me that he keeps his kids, young teenagers, in organized activities during all of their free hours because it keeps them occupied and out of trouble. He says his kids seem to enjoy it. Maybe they do, I don't know.
What I do know is that this kind of 24/7 scheduling would drive me completely bonkers and cause major anxiety.
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past July 31, 2015 | Registered: 11 years ago Posts: 469 |
I think that today people in general want to brag about how busy they are as a way of pointing out how much in demand their time and attention is. I recently read an article outlining the pet peeves of successful people. Arianna Huffington said that people who brag about being busy drive her crazy. Here's the link, just for fun:
http://www.businessinsider.com/pet-peeves-of-successful-people-2015-07
Breeders these days want to micromanage their kyds' schedules. They have them in soccer practice, followed by piano lessons, followed by tai-kwon-do, followed by helping with dinner, followed by homework... The kids have no free time, which leads to the entitlement we see in the younger generation. They have been scheduled and catered to like fucking pop stars with somebody managing their every minute.
When I was a kid, I got up early on Saturday morning and watched cartoons while my parents slept in. When they got up, we had breakfast, and then I was outside playing until dinner with no supervision. Here is proof that things have changed in a single generation. It's a new commercial by Nature Valley (the granola bars) where they interview three different generations in a few families about what their childhoods were like. It is expository, to say the least:
http://www.mostwatchedtoday.com/nature-valley-rediscover-nature/
http://www.businessinsider.com/pet-peeves-of-successful-people-2015-07
Breeders these days want to micromanage their kyds' schedules. They have them in soccer practice, followed by piano lessons, followed by tai-kwon-do, followed by helping with dinner, followed by homework... The kids have no free time, which leads to the entitlement we see in the younger generation. They have been scheduled and catered to like fucking pop stars with somebody managing their every minute.
When I was a kid, I got up early on Saturday morning and watched cartoons while my parents slept in. When they got up, we had breakfast, and then I was outside playing until dinner with no supervision. Here is proof that things have changed in a single generation. It's a new commercial by Nature Valley (the granola bars) where they interview three different generations in a few families about what their childhoods were like. It is expository, to say the least:
http://www.mostwatchedtoday.com/nature-valley-rediscover-nature/
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past July 31, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,308 |
Quote
starbelly
Breeders these days want to micromanage their kyds' schedules. They have them in soccer practice, followed by piano lessons, followed by tai-kwon-do, followed by helping with dinner, followed by homework... The kids have no free time, which leads to the entitlement we see in the younger generation. They have been scheduled and catered to like fucking pop stars with somebody managing their every minute.
I know guys today who have shoulders, hips, and knees who are completely shot in their early 40s as a result of playing all of these organized sports for so many years. And they didn't even play them to the degree that today's kids are playing them. One co-worker has a kid who loves baseball, so he plays on the town team, travel team, fall ball team, and indoor offseason workout team.
What is the point of spending so much time and money on these organized sports? Unless the kid is going to be a professional athlete, why waste so many resources on these pointless activities? (And remember, 99.999% of them won't be professional athletes.)
When I go into work on Monday, I find myself speechless when I hear that parents are spending literally all of their free hours on weekends watching a bunch of 8 year olds play soccer. That sounds like torture for the parents, and for the kids, too. I see no good reason for this.
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past July 31, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 721 |
Quote
mrs. chinaski
I think that the main issue is that chyldren were
a part of life in the past, today they
are the centre of life.
It's because the media, with it's constant message of "breeding is the most fulfilling thing you can do in life!" is making parents feel that any effort towards anything outside of child-rearing is futile and fruitless. They want more children because that inflates to consumer base.
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past July 31, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 7,834 |
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past July 31, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 1,391 |
Quote
StudioFiftyFour
Quote
starbelly
Breeders these days want to micromanage their kyds' schedules. They have them in soccer practice, followed by piano lessons, followed by tai-kwon-do, followed by helping with dinner, followed by homework... The kids have no free time, which leads to the entitlement we see in the younger generation. They have been scheduled and catered to like fucking pop stars with somebody managing their every minute.
I know guys today who have shoulders, hips, and knees who are completely shot in their early 40s as a result of playing all of these organized sports for so many years. And they didn't even play them to the degree that today's kids are playing them. One co-worker has a kid who loves baseball, so he plays on the town team, travel team, fall ball team, and indoor offseason workout team.
What is the point of spending so much time and money on these organized sports? Unless the kid is going to be a professional athlete, why waste so many resources on these pointless activities? (And remember, 99.999% of them won't be professional athletes.)
When I go into work on Monday, I find myself speechless when I hear that parents are spending literally all of their free hours on weekends watching a bunch of 8 year olds play soccer. That sounds like torture for the parents, and for the kids, too. I see no good reason for this.
Snobbery! Where would it end, if kids got together with other kids that mummy didn't pre-approve of, and played a sport of their choice that any kid could play, not only those kids, whose parents paid for it? Shitley must only be friends with those kids, whose parents can pay a lot of money for various crap. Because friendship isn't honest human interaction; it's impressing others with how much money you can spend for objects, holidays, parties, ...
Junior could learn something that mummy didn't want him to learn! Mummy wouldn't get to brag about how much money she paid for balls, special shoes, and special attire. Not to mention the fees for the club.
Naturally, there must be clubs, because how else are kids going to compete with each other, and how else can parents be assured that their kid is better than other kids?
Bratley can't be allowed to play football, just because she enjoys it. She must win and make her parents proud, so that they will have something to brag about, since their own lives are so pathetically empty.
AND, since mummy has to be present for all these activities, she can look around for udder-rubs about what a good mummy she is, and how much she does for her kids.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
" ... what's one more once you've already got two shedding on the couch?"
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past July 31, 2015 | Registered: 8 years ago Posts: 197 |
Quote
jarednovio
My grandmother had 9 children.
She loved reading books, playing the piano, making flower compositions, singing, playing cards with friend. And she kept doing those things despite 8 children.
She never once in her life has said something like "being a mother is so hard" or "they should make me a statue" or "my children are perfect" or "I don't have time". She never once thought that she had to abandon her friends and interest and 100% obsess about being a mother, buying useless things to their children and make every conversation 100% about their kids and their perfection.
Then what's so wrong with today breeders if even after just 1 ONE child they feel entitled to: abandon their friends, claim to have no free time, making children the only topic of their conversation, showing millions of children pictures to everyone, whine about how expensive having a child is because of all the spongebob/frozen/child-safery mafia/disney channel cable stuff you HAVE to buy, expect everyone to play with their children for hours as if they were paid babysitters, change completely attitude/beliefs/interests because of the child.
My grandmother herself said "people try too hard today and them make a lot of mistakes as parents, they shoud avoid having children".
And again this shows to me that it's not something about breeders that makes them obnoxious and boring but about todays breeders and their pretensious culture, to the point that even the grandmothers criticize all the fuss they make about parenting.
Your grandma also likely had a lot of help in the form of other relatives, neighbors, etc. Back then, people had more of the "it takes a village" mentality because breeding wasn't as much of a choice.
Nowadays, with relatives quite possibly being scattered all over the place, and breeders hesitating to let strangers babysit their brood, rearing brats has become a much more isolating experience, thus being more difficult.
I believe that, because brats are so naturally needy and demanding, the job of raising them was meant to be a group effort. Don't get me wrong -- I mean this from an evolutionary standpoint. I'm not trying to say that we owe breeders babysitting, not ever -- I'm simply trying to state my perspective as well as possible from an evolutionary POV, since we used to live in groups as cavemen, and cavewomen.
We used to live in tribes, and everyone, like aunts, uncles, et cetera, all pitched in to help the little burdens survive.
My understanding is that, over a hundred years ago, many people lived in huge, shared dwellings, and everyone contributed to the rearing of the beasts. If this was true for your granny, it explains why it was much easier for her to have an identity outside of her brats.
It was also not an issue back in the day for complete strangers to discipline brats who weren't theirs.
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past July 31, 2015 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 1,788 |
Parents who let little kids do the same sport all year long are idiots. Little kids shouldn't engage in the same motion all year long. Medically speaking, their joints and muscles aren't developed enough yet. If they want to play football/baseball/soccer year around that is their choice.
I did many activities as a kid including dance lessons, marching band, a lifeguard job, state paid for creative writing school for the arts and cheerleading, all at the same time. I don't have any adult problems as a result and my parents never whined about any of it.
I did many activities as a kid including dance lessons, marching band, a lifeguard job, state paid for creative writing school for the arts and cheerleading, all at the same time. I don't have any adult problems as a result and my parents never whined about any of it.
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past August 01, 2015 | Registered: 11 years ago Posts: 3,576 |
Quote
jarednovio
My grandmother had 9 children.
She loved reading books, playing the piano, making flower compositions, singing, playing cards with friend. And she kept doing those things despite 8 children.
She never once in her life has said something like "being a mother is so hard" or "they should make me a statue" or "my children are perfect" or "I don't have time". She never once thought that she had to abandon her friends and interest and 100% obsess about being a mother, buying useless things to their children and make every conversation 100% about their kids and their perfection.
Then what's so wrong with today breeders if even after just 1 ONE child they feel entitled to: abandon their friends, claim to have no free time, making children the only topic of their conversation, showing millions of children pictures to everyone, whine about how expensive having a child is because of all the spongebob/frozen/child-safery mafia/disney channel cable stuff you HAVE to buy, expect everyone to play with their children for hours as if they were paid babysitters, change completely attitude/beliefs/interests because of the child.
My grandmother herself said "people try too hard today and them make a lot of mistakes as parents, they shoud avoid having children".
And again this shows to me that it's not something about breeders that makes them obnoxious and boring but about todays breeders and their pretensious culture, to the point that even the grandmothers criticize all the fuss they make about parenting.
Your grandma didn't 'spend bags of time' entertaining her brats, thus forcing them to learn self entertainment. That also creates imaginations.
+++++++++++++
Passive Aggressive
Master Of Anti-brat
Excuses!
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past August 01, 2015 | Registered: 10 years ago Posts: 121 |
I played AYSO soccer for a few summers as a kid, then swam my freshman year of high school. Both sports because my mom wanted me to and my dad grudging went along with it. I hated both of them.
I grew up in the woods and in the fields. I lived on the edge of the suburbs and spent all my free time in the rural direction. As I grew a couple farmers noticed me hanging around in the area and put me to work, I was probably 7 or 8 at the time. I thought it was fun and when I got that first months pay check it was even more fun!
I grew up working around men and women who's life was work. It instilled in me an incredible work ethic and a resourcefulness that has drawn comment from every employer I've ever worked for. I've been described as part cowboy, part MacGiver and part engineer.
I wouldn't trade the way I grew up for 10 childhood spent in front of a gaming station or with my time scheduled every waking minute.
I grew up in the woods and in the fields. I lived on the edge of the suburbs and spent all my free time in the rural direction. As I grew a couple farmers noticed me hanging around in the area and put me to work, I was probably 7 or 8 at the time. I thought it was fun and when I got that first months pay check it was even more fun!
I grew up working around men and women who's life was work. It instilled in me an incredible work ethic and a resourcefulness that has drawn comment from every employer I've ever worked for. I've been described as part cowboy, part MacGiver and part engineer.
I wouldn't trade the way I grew up for 10 childhood spent in front of a gaming station or with my time scheduled every waking minute.
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past August 02, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 1,842 |
Breakstuff, I always like to swim but I am so glad I was not on the Breed Hills swim team because there was no way I could bring myself to wear a red Speedo trimmed in gold. My dad tried to make me a tennis player, but by that time, he had already had a heart attack and when he attempted to play with me, it was pathetic, I would hit the ball and he would walk to it. So I guess he was not good enough condition to push it on me, which I why once in a while I play it today.
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past August 02, 2015 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 951 |
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Re: Modern breeders vs parents of the past August 02, 2015 | Registered: 11 years ago Posts: 672 |
Quote
JohnDrake
I think it goes along with the rise of narcissism in our society. With more people being narcissistic, more parents will be too. There have been discussions of narcissistic parents in other threads and it used to be those kind were few and far between, now they are commonplace. Narcissistic parents don't think the kid is an individual, they think the kid is an extension of themselves and exists primarily to meet the needs of the parents and the kid's needs don't matter. The kid has to be in loads of activities and have tons of trophies, awards, etc., so the parents can brag and be proud. Who cares if the kid just wants to be a kid?
The problem is that society condones being narcissistic through your kid. There is still (some) societal pressure to not be a complete self- absorbed jackass over yourself. But channel it through your kid and it's actually considered being "selfless" and "sacrificing". It's neither. These narcissists create offspring idols to mask the fact that they idolize themselves. The kid becomes a proxy for all the self-indulgence and worship the parent wants to lavish on themselves, plus they get accolades for being a super mawm on top of it.
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