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"Desperate not to have children"

Posted by yurble 
"Desperate not to have children"
November 23, 2015
BBC article interviewing two women: "Some women are desperate to have children - but some are desperate not to. Here two who want to stay child-free explain why. Holly Brockwell, 29, from London, has been trying to get sterilised, while in Tehran thirty-something Nina Nikoo (not her real name) faces family pressure to get pregnant."
Re: "Desperate not to have children"
November 23, 2015
What's really sad is the Iranian woman's statement at the end about waiting and hoping she'll change her mind. Even more sad, considering the culture she grew upon, she was probably brainwashed her whole life to believe it's unnatural for a woman not to want kids, so she's now burdened with guilt she doesn't deserve.
Re: "Desperate not to have children"
November 24, 2015
Quote
aes sedai
What's really sad is the Iranian woman's statement at the end about waiting and hoping she'll change her mind. Even more sad, considering the culture she grew upon, she was probably brainwashed her whole life to believe it's unnatural for a woman not to want kids, so she's now burdened with guilt she doesn't deserve.

I found that sad, too. But the rest of her story, about being busy with her business, made me think she may conveniently fail to find her desire to have children until it is too late. At least she isn't going ahead despite a lack of desire, which must already require a degree of determination.
Re: "Desperate not to have children"
November 28, 2015
There was a follow-up article on the UK woman who predictably received a lot of abuse online over her statement. And yet some jerks still feel the need to ask "what's the big deal?"
Re: "Desperate not to have children"
November 28, 2015
I saw this article posted by a friend and i wasn't surprised at all. Some of you might remember the idiot who called me a whore when i said i don't want kids and got very agressive towards me at a birthday party.

Also as i see from the article she's running a tech website and these vitriolic comments were mostly made by men. How dare a woman have a career in a male dominated field and not want kids? The horror!eye rolling smiley Now that i think about the freak who insulted me also made some stingy remarks about my good grades...something of the kind that i don't a life.

These persons' lives must be so empty if they are so desperate to insult and make another's human life miserable for some choices that will never affect them personally. And if men feel so threatened by a woman who doesn't want kids well, it says a lot about their lack of self-esteem.
Re: "Desperate not to have children"
November 28, 2015
It's mind-blowing that it should still be controversial in 2015. The childfree have probably existed for millennia; it's just that now we have the wherewithal to live our lives the way we want, without the burden of forced childbearing. And it definitely says a lot about men who can't accept that. FFS, why is it anybody's business whether my Better Half and I have kyds?

It takes a child to raze a village.
Re: "Desperate not to have children"
December 02, 2015
I know the UK lass, Holly, and she really was upset by it. This happens to female journos a lot, particularly those who work in male-dominated spaces like she does in tech journalism. The misogynists really seem to go for them more than any other female journos. I've had the odd bit of flak over CF writing but more from people I know (family mostly in fact) who think it's not something one should write about/speak about in public. Yet it's fine for there to be loads of inane breeder columns and articles about beefing and all the TMI aspects of childbirfin.
Re: "Desperate not to have children"
December 02, 2015
That's so right! It seems that everywhere you turn your head today, you see pronatalism.

What it bothers me is that there is so much hypocrisy about it when it comes to climate change. There was this climate change meeting in Paris and our press was full with news about it including what you can do to stop climate change. Trust me, i didn't see even ONCE mentioned the kid question...having fewer kids or remaining childfree. Not even once. But two pages after climate change news, there was a big article about how Finns are not having more babies and the birth rates are declining which is so worrying. The solution proposed was giving more money to people to have kids.

Meanwhile people who don't want kids are told to shut up and harassed. And believe it or not, many idiots think that overpopulation is not real.

I give up. This stupidity is beyond me.
Re: "Desperate not to have children"
December 02, 2015
Quote
yummynotmummy
I know the UK lass, Holly, and she really was upset by it. This happens to female journos a lot, particularly those who work in male-dominated spaces like she does in tech journalism. The misogynists really seem to go for them more than any other female journos. I've had the odd bit of flak over CF writing but more from people I know (family mostly in fact) who think it's not something one should write about/speak about in public. Yet it's fine for there to be loads of inane breeder columns and articles about beefing and all the TMI aspects of childbirfin.

Surprisingly, I don't get that much, despite working in a male-dominated field (IT). I think it's because a lot of men are indifferent to children or at least don't define their identity through children to the same extent that many women do, so if you can get past the first hurdle (industry sexism), your co-workers are unlikely to give a shit. (In tech journalism you're exposing yourself to every low-life in the field, whereas in a company that's not the case.) I'm pretty openly CF and only really get hassled by strangers, not family, friends or co-workers.
Re: "Desperate not to have children"
December 04, 2015
almost everything is geared to make sure a males dick werx..

two cents ΒΆΒΆ

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
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