My 19-year-old little baby ran away from home! Waahhh!

Here is an interesting collection of tidbits from people whose over-18, GROWN children have "run away from home." (Are you fucking kidding me? No, sadly, I am not.)

http://www.circleofmoms.com/welcome-circle-moms/my-19-year-old-son-ran-away-from-home-881032

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I'm heart broken right now, my 19 year old son ran away to live with his girlfriend that he met online. His girlfriend is 21 and lives in St. Louis, MO with her mother. My son has never been away from home and he now refuses to come back. He tells lies about our home and he hates me. He's not working or in school.
I was a teenage mother and had my son when I was 18, his father and I have been together for more than 20 years now. We spoiled Al (our son's name) from infancy. He has never wanted for anything nor has he had to work to support himself. Our only rule was for him to go to school and get his education. Al has graduated from high school and we were touring colleges before he left.
I know we are great parents, I just can't understand where we went wrong with him. He doesn't talk to my husband or I, he talks to people that haven't played a part in his life ever (ie my younger sister, his step sister who don't have his best interest at heart.
I just want the pain to stop, we have two younger sons that we have to care for, but it's so hard to be whole when a part of your heart is missing.
I welcome any and all advice.

This just makes no sense. Probably the poor girl went to live with her stepbrother because mom is psycho!

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I have a 19 years old daughter who now is living in with her step brother she only sms does not talk on the phone refusing to speak the truth she is with her step brother when we tell her to come home she says I need to be alone for sometime

"Wahhh, I guilt-tripped my son and cried for days begging him not to join the army, but he went anyway as soon as he turned 18!"

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When my son was 15 he told me he was enlisting in the service when he turned 18. I begged, pleaded, yelled, screamed, cried and yes.... I even pulled the guilt trip with no luck. He turned 18 on Friday and enlisted the Monday after. He has now been gone since October 28, 2013 and I still feel such an emptiness in my heart. I was told this past week by him that he will be deploying to Kuwait in July. He says he wants to be a man I can be proud of and carry on the family tradition as he is now the 6th generation of Army soldiers in our family. I have always been proud of him, he was never an out of control kid and didn't get into trouble. I am having so much trouble with this that I can barely talk to him without wanting to cry, I wake up every morning wanting to go into his room and see his face, I know I'm depressed but I can't stop it because I want my child home. I don't like the thought of not knowing where he's at or that he could be put in danger. I do my best to keep him from knowing what I'm going through because this was his dream and I don't want to crush his dreams so I am as supportive as I can be. Please if anyone has any advice it would be greatly appreciated

Ahhh "Circle of Moms". I actually enjoy lurking about and reading articles in that forum. Many of those posts are popcorn-and-beer worthy. Trainwrecky fun! Hmmm, and a 19yo "running away" from home. That phrase is used mostly for minor childen. In this case I believe that the more appropriate terminology is "left home" instead.

My only advice to these "kids" of dependent moomies?

RUN FORREST RUN!!!

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"It is better not to look like what you are; it is better to look like a bourgeois woman because then all the doors are open for you and then you can just go and make hell." - Marjane Satrapi

Waaaaah! My adult child decided he/she wants to be an... y'know... adult, and ran away from home! Since my only identity for the last twenty or so years has been mommy and I never developed any interests or hobbies outside my kids, and I pretty much burned bridges with all my former friends because I dropped them as soon as I gave birth, thinking I was too cool for the room now that I was a mommy, I have nothing else to live for! I mean, why would they strike out on their own like that? Can't they understand it hurts me Not having something to cling on to because I have no life? Don't they care that I cry every night while looking at baby photos completely fucked up on vodka and Xanax? How can they be so selfish? Can't they understand that I'm a sad, pathetic shell of a human being completely dependent on others for happiness? Boohoohoohoohoohoo!

Bitch, get some therapy.

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electricfire
...I never developed any interests or hobbies outside my kids, and I pretty much burned bridges with all my former friends because I dropped them as soon as I gave birth, thinking I was too cool for the room now that I was a mommy, I have nothing else to live for! I mean, why would they strike out on their own like that? Can't they understand it hurts me Not having something to cling on to because I have no life? Don't they care that I cry every night while looking at baby photos completely fucked up on vodka and Xanax? How can they be so selfish? Can't they understand that I'm a sad, pathetic shell of a human being completely dependent on others for happiness? Boohoohoohoohoohoo!

Bitch, get some therapy.

I wish that the friends I lost to children would read some of those threads. It occurred to me yesterday as I was having lunch with two friends, one child-free and one childless, that my circle of friends in a crap town of hicks with no culture are some of the most educated and interesting people I have ever met. We are all different ages, with one common denominator: No one has children at home. Most of my friends are either child-free or childless, so all of us have hobbies and interests and well-developed opinions on topics other than breastfeeding.

Uhh, I don't think legal adults can run away from home. Most parents are happy when their kids want to leave home and become independent adults. Seriously, at what point did parents go from celebrating being able to boot their kids out the door on their 18th birthdays to mourning their departure at the same age?

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I know we are great parents, I just can't understand where we went wrong with him. He doesn't talk to my husband or I, he talks to people that haven't played a part in his life ever.

Yeah okay. Parents who come out and say they were/are great parents usually are awful parents. Lady, if your kid is moved out of the house at 18, I'd say you did something right. A lot of millennials stay at home with Mommy and Daddy until their thirties, or even later. Be glad yours was one of the ones that flew the coop.

I bet the Duhs of these kids aren't bawling their eyes out over their adult children leaving and having lives of their own. It's the Moos who always act like this. Now that the beasts they've been raising for the better part of two decades are grown up and leaving the house, these women have no idea what to do with themselves because they've only identified as mothers for so long and they don't know who or what they are when the kids leave. So rather than being supportive of their ADULT kids' choices, they'd rather cry and guilt-trip those kids for leaving. The kid who enlisted in the army probably wanted to get as far away from his loony maternal unit as possible and he knew she wouldn't be able to follow him overseas. Good parenting, right there. My mother will likely be the same way and will do everything in her power to prevent me from ever moving out because then she won't have a captive audience anymore.

They need to be thankful because one third of my age group still lives with our parents. I predict that the boomers and gen X-ers (my parents' generations) would probably have their kyds live with them until the day they die. When you are single, high cost of living, debt, and living the in the same town as your parents it makes sense to live at home. If I graduated from university, you bet I would move out.

Yeah, leaving home at 18/19 isn't running away, it's moving out. What the actual fuck.

And yes, anyone who needs to tell you what great parents they are, you can count on being fucked up as shit, just like people who need to tell you what good Christians they are. If you were that damn good, people would know by looking, they wouldn't need to be told. But then, both of those groups are inveterate hypocrites, too, so I suppose it's to be expected.

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thundergirl85
"Wahhh, I guilt-tripped my son and cried for days begging him not to join the army, but he went anyway as soon as he turned 18!"

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When my son was 15 he told me he was enlisting in the service when he turned 18. I begged, pleaded, yelled, screamed, cried and yes.... I even pulled the guilt trip with no luck. He turned 18 on Friday and enlisted the Monday after. He has now been gone since October 28, 2013 and I still feel such an emptiness in my heart. I was told this past week by him that he will be deploying to Kuwait in July. He says he wants to be a man I can be proud of and carry on the family tradition as he is now the 6th generation of Army soldiers in our family. I have always been proud of him, he was never an out of control kid and didn't get into trouble. I am having so much trouble with this that I can barely talk to him without wanting to cry, I wake up every morning wanting to go into his room and see his face, I know I'm depressed but I can't stop it because I want my child home. I don't like the thought of not knowing where he's at or that he could be put in danger. I do my best to keep him from knowing what I'm going through because this was his dream and I don't want to crush his dreams so I am as supportive as I can be. Please if anyone has any advice it would be greatly appreciated

Understandable to want to give the son perspective of a life not enlisting in the service. But the kid declared this at 15, joined at 18 in 2013 and now it is nearly 2017. Moo had 3 years to come to terms with his decision while he lived at home (and most likely sealed the deal with her begging, pleading, yelling, screaming and crying) and 3+ more years have passed since he enlisted and she is still depressed about it?

Echoing electricfire's sentiment "Bitch, get some therapy."

"I bet the Duhs of these kids aren't bawling their eyes out over their adult children leaving and having lives of their own."

I'd even go so far as to say they're secretly wishing they could fuck off too, but don't because of other children in the house or fear of incurring the bitch's wrath. I'm pretty sure most duhs just go along with their wives, but privately tell their children to keep doing what they're doing and not to listen to obsessive psycho Mommy. My mother is kind of like that, although not as extreme.