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Duh tries to hire hitman to get rid of wife and kid

Posted by LoveToLurk 
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LoveToLurk
Duh tries to hire hitman to get rid of wife and kid
February 12, 2017
Duh wants wife and kid dead, tries to hire hitman but accidentally texts the wrong person.

Link

I wonder if this was a case of "he'll love it when it gets here?"

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"Not every ejaculation deserves a name" - George Carlin
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cflucy
Re: Duh tries to hire hitman to get rid of wife and kid
February 12, 2017
I lied about birth control, oops! (tee hee hee) face eating another face with frog tongue
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retro lizard
Re: Duh tries to hire hitman to get rid of wife and kid
February 13, 2017
He should have went to the deep web, LOL.dancing
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shy lurker
Re: Duh tries to hire hitman to get rid of wife and kid
February 13, 2017
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retro lizard
He should have went to the deep web, LOL.dancing

That's what I was thinking. The partner of the murder victim is the first person questioned especially when a big, fat life insurance policy was recently taken out.
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cassia
Re: Duh tries to hire hitman to get rid of wife and kid
February 13, 2017
It is worth clicking on the link to the article.
The accused man sent texts that explicitly show motive, means and opportunity for his murder for hire for his wife and child.
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kman
Re: Duh tries to hire hitman to get rid of wife and kid
February 13, 2017
If the story hasn't been garbled, he seemed to say his wife had $1 million in life insurance and his 4–year-old daughter $500,000 on her own policy. The problem is that insurance companies will not normally insure a kid's life for that kind of money. Those whole-life policies that pay no more than $10,000 or so to cover funeral expenses are the norm for young children.

One comment to the linked story claims that the wife knows of no such $1 million policy on her, either. Maybe this idiot was trying to vent somehow, and if no life insurance policies existed in reality, the authorities might not have much of a case left. Oh well, sucks to be him right now. But the breeders will tell you married bliss with kids is all worth it and we CF are the selfish ones.
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StudioFiftyFour
Re: Duh tries to hire hitman to get rid of wife and kid
February 13, 2017
Quote
kman
If the story hasn't been garbled, he seemed to say his wife had $1 million in life insurance and his 4–year-old daughter $500,000 on her own policy. The problem is that insurance companies will not normally insure a kid's life for that kind of money. Those whole-life policies that pay no more than $10,000 or so to cover funeral expenses are the norm for young children.

One comment to the linked story claims that the wife knows of no such $1 million policy on her, either. Maybe this idiot was trying to vent somehow, and if no life insurance policies existed in reality, the authorities might not have much of a case left. Oh well, sucks to be him right now. But the breeders will tell you married bliss with kids is all worth it and we CF are the selfish ones.




Life insurance. What a great idea!

We'll place people in a high-stress/LifeScript circumstance in which one partner becomes an instant millionaire... if and only if the other partner dies.

What could possibly go wrong?!? bemused eye roll
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paragon schnitzophonic
Re: Duh tries to hire hitman to get rid of wife and kid
February 14, 2017
And then have a clause where one gets paid double (or more) the amount of the policy if the spouse dies in an accident or murder not committed by the beneficiary.

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"Why children take so long to grow? They eat and drink like pig and give nothing back. Must find way to accelerate process..."
- Dr. Yi Suchong, Bioshock

"Society does not need more children; but it does need more loved children. Quite literally, we cannot afford unloved children - but we pay heavily for them every day. There should not be the slightest communal concern when a woman elects to destroy the life of her thousandth-of-an-ounce embryo. But all society should rise up in alarm when it hears that a baby that is not wanted is about to be born."
- Garrett Hardin

"I feel like there's a message involved here somehow, but then I couldn't stop laughing at all the plotholes, like the part when North Korea has food."
- Youtube commentor referring to a North Korean cartoon.

"Reality is a bitch when it slowly crawls out of your vagina and shits in your lap."
- Reddit comment

"Bitch wants a baby, so we're gonna fuck now. #bareback"
- Cambion

Oh whatever. Abortion doctors are crimestoppers."
- Miss Hannigan
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cfinboston
Re: Duh tries to hire hitman to get rid of wife and kid
February 14, 2017
I don't believe this is real. They have a $1M life insurance policy on a woman that works at Wal-Mart? Doubtful. And a half million on a four year old? That seems super fishy. If duh is out of work, how are they even keeping up the premiums? When the insurance company gets a death certificate saying "homicide" I doubt they'd be in a hurry to pay out prior to a conviction.
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contemplativeintrovert
Re: Duh tries to hire hitman to get rid of wife and kid
February 14, 2017
Maybe duh lied to the hit man because he couldn't afford him? Idk how these things work irl, but if movies are to be believed hit men charge a lot.
Oh courses, lying to a hit man would be pretty stupid, but we are talking a breeder here, so who knows?

Lock him up or put him down.
Stolen from Shiny.
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