Can we separate women's health issues from breeding issues?

After i was diagnosed with endometriosis (still waiting for surgery to confirm), i started looking for more info and also joined support groups in order to find out useful stuff about treatments, the disease itself, experiences, surgeries, diets etc. But alas, instead the main topic in every group and on every forum seems to be infertility and pregnancy tips.

Ok, i understand that endometriosis causes infertility but i see that the main issue with this disease is pain which can wreck your life and make you partially disabled. It seems that these women (and doctors) are not primarily interested in that but in how to get knocked up faster. There were also some moos bitching how hard is to take care of their kids because of this disease and encouraging themselves to have some more because it keeps the disease under control.

I feel that i'm all alone with this struggle because nobody gives a shit anymore if you don't want kids. They are not interested in understanding you, sharing experiences or even talking to you. And lots of doctors are not even interested in treating you if you don't want to get knocked up.

No wonder there is no known cause for this disease and no cure. Because the main focus in not on finding the cause and cure, the main focus is to get women knocked up. Endometriosis is just an example but there are many other reproductive health issues which are not even taken seriously unless the almighty womb raider is involved. Sometimes this just makes me want to give up my field and start all over into medical research in order to find a cure for these diseases.

I just want to mention a case in which a woman lost her kidney because of endometriosis complications and now she is undergoing surgery to save her second kidney which is not working well. But by no means, be obsessed with infertility, that will surely cure it. *sarcasm*

I'm sorry you have to deal with this.

Many people seem to have the attitude that if a woman does not want to breed she is worthless. It doesn't matter what else she is doing with her life or why she does not want kids, fuck her if she isn't all about teh bebbehs.

You would think people would be more enlightened in the 21st century, but if anything we are going backwards.

I really hate that you have to go through this.

Not sure about Finland but in the US I've had the best luck of all with naturopathic doctors. They listened to me, gave me blood tests where they suspected issues to confirm the root cause and didn't focus on my reproductive status other than eliminating it as a cause of any of my symptoms. If you can find a nutritionist that may also be a good bet.

Allopathic doctors missed cancer for years, never tested me for anemia or vitamin D deficiency or gluten sensitivity either. They wanted to give me antidepressants because I was tired (seriously, please!!!!) due to many smaller health issues.

I have a friend with endometriosis and MSG is a huge trigger that makes her feel terrible, in case that helps.

If all you have is allopathic doctors, do you know of anyone who may be able to provide you with a good referral? Hoping there is someone decent that is local to you.

The Guardian was doing a series on this, and quite a few women were complaining about the focus of women's health care. I've seen it myself, although fortunately not as severely, when being forced to take pregnancy tests before a treatment which would have had no averse effects on me had I been pregnant.

The problem is that most of us want treatment, so we feel like we can't protest this bullshit or we risk having our treatment withdrawn. Of course this is not the case when treatment is being denied in the first place.

There's so much evidence that women are not getting the same quality of healthcare but I don't know what can be done about it

I agree with freya - your main focus should be finding a provider that will actually *listen* to you. Are you going to a small ob/gyn office, or one that's affiliated with a hospital/part of a big group? Do you see the OB, or a nurse practitioner/PA at your appointments? Usually I've found a NP in a smaller practice will take more time to listen to your concerns. Even if you can only book an appt with a counselor to go over what you're feeling. They could even work with you on ways to be more assertive in your Dr appointments and organize what you want to go over while you're there.

I don't think you should be afraid to say straight out "Fertility is not my concern. I'm here to manage the pain/do XYZ. I need ABC from you."

There are only big hospitals around here and no naturopaths, i don't even think they are allowed to practice. Medical field is very restricted and you are allowed to go only to the hospital of the city you live in. So, i have absolutely no choice in this matter. I can't even choose my doctor, the hospital makes an appointment with the doctor that is free at the moment. They are all ob/gyns although i would have liked an endometriosis specialist.

I didn't get any hard time from them about breeding but they do follow a certain protocol that is to restore your fertility and lately this country has been in the international media for severe drop in birthrates. So, i think that this hysteria affects somehow their medical protocols.

The thing is that i really wanted some support in these groups but unfortunately i can't get it because i don't want to get knocked up. I needed some info on the laparoscopy and one woman told me that i should get knocked up immediately after the surgery. I told her i'm not interested in that and she asked why do i bother then to have the surgery as i am a drain on the medical system. I should just put my body into menopause permanently and that's it. It doesn't matter that the cyst might be malignant and you can't just induce menopause permanently. I never went back to their "support" group afterwards. Support my ass.

How well does Finland handle freedom of movement for healthcare? In theory, you're supposed to be able to travel to other countries to have your medical needs met. In practice, there are often restrictions on it.

If your condition makes you at all prone to collapsing, you should perhaps plan a trip to a less natalist country inside the EU and find a need to seek medical treatment abroad...

Quote
ondinette
I'm sorry you have to deal with this.

Many people seem to have the attitude that if a woman does not want to breed she is worthless. It doesn't matter what else she is doing with her life or why she does not want kids, fuck her if she isn't all about teh bebbehs.

You would think people would be more enlightened in the 21st century, but if anything we are going backwards.

People are more enlightened in the 21st century, just not in the United States. America is rapidly backsliding into a third world hellhole.

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Passive Aggressive
Master Of Anti-brat
Excuses!

Quote
blackpearl
There are only big hospitals around here and no naturopaths, i don't even think they are allowed to practice. Medical field is very restricted and you are allowed to go only to the hospital of the city you live in. So, i have absolutely no choice in this matter. I can't even choose my doctor, the hospital makes an appointment with the doctor that is free at the moment. They are all ob/gyns although i would have liked an endometriosis specialist.

I didn't get any hard time from them about breeding but they do follow a certain protocol that is to restore your fertility and lately this country has been in the international media for severe drop in birthrates. So, i think that this hysteria affects somehow their medical protocols.

The thing is that i really wanted some support in these groups but unfortunately i can't get it because i don't want to get knocked up. I needed some info on the laparoscopy and one woman told me that i should get knocked up immediately after the surgery. I told her i'm not interested in that and she asked why do i bother then to have the surgery as i am a drain on the medical system. I should just put my body into menopause permanently and that's it. It doesn't matter that the cyst might be malignant and you can't just induce menopause permanently. I never went back to their "support" group afterwards. Support my ass.

When I had my hysterectomy I slid into instant menopause. That may be the path your stuck on. To avoid severe menopausal symptoms I would promptly go on estrogen cream/patch and a progesterone pill every day.

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Passive Aggressive
Master Of Anti-brat
Excuses!

I'm sorry you're having to go through this. Would you be able to go somewhere else? If I'm not mistaken being a citizen of an EU country means you are given certain benefits in other EU countries. Could you maybe go someplace more progressive like England and seek treatment there? Also, I don't know if planned parenthood exists outside the US or if they could help, but could you maybe contact planned parenthood / their Finnish counterparts and ask for a referral to a more impartial doctor?

Lock him up or put him down.
Stolen from Shiny.

I would try going abroad if i could afford it. Here it is quite expensive, too. I had to spend 200 euros to get a diagnosis in a private clinic because the GP from the public hospital didn't take me seriously. And even so, an appointment with an ob/gyn at a public hospital is 42 euros and the surgery is about 150 plus 50 euros per night if you have to stay in the hospital. Add to that the post-surgery check-up. I mean it's ok, the real price of the surgery would be around 3000 euros so i'm not complaining.

In my case there won't be even a mention of hysterectomy (i really don't want one) but i know that in most countries they don't do hysterectomies so easily on women under 40. I don't think is directly tied to pronatalism but there is a protocol that doctors need to follow. If they don't, they might get in trouble. The ones working in medical profession maybe they know what i'm talking about.

I can't really say what was my doctor's opinion about breeding, she mentioned i might lose my ovary and said not to worry i'll have the other in case i decide to breed. I said that i don't want kids and she said that's my personal decision. She didn't mention anything on the subject afterwards. What disturbed me about her was that she was very selfish with info about the whole procedure and what to expect from it. It felt like she just wanted to get rid of me very fast.