Re: Ex-boyfriend contacting me through friend and he's a breeder now!
March 29, 2018
Not sure what it is with some of these guys. My wife's first boyfriend from high school(she graduated in 1986) contacted her through Facebook sometime back. He had since been married twice and had just gotten out of a 5 year relationship and just wanted to talk. She told him that they could only be friends because she was married. He responded saying he should have married during the time they were together, which bothered me.

She told me about how she met him while working at McDonald's and how she thought he was nice but he only had one thing on his mind and considered her a challenge because she wouldn't put out. After one of the two proms they attended, he tried to force himself on her and she had to punch him to get him to stop. What finally ended it between them was he got another girl pregnant and even though he "took responsibility"(how much responsibility can a teen working at McDonalds take for a baby), she broke it off with him.

He tracked her down a few years later while they were in college and they tried to get back together. He wanted to still date around and she wanted more and of course, he wanted her to put out and she wouldn't. It finally came to an end one night when he hit on her best friend and exposed himself to her. She told him she never wanted to see him again. A couple of years later, he called her parents' home and she wasn't there, and he didn't call her back. That happened again a couple of years later and she told him to leave her alone, and she hadn't heard from him in years until Facebook.

It ended up with him being messaged that she had moved on and was happily married and didn't want to mess that up, as he was obviously looking for more. After that, he unfriended her and hopes this is the last she hears from him.
Holy crap, JohnDrake! The nerve of him! I'm so glad your wife decided to cut contact from him altogether. I am doing the same thing with my ex, because I don't want any drama in my life. I'm too busy trying to get my schooling done and work on my marriage, and I have no time for him or his antics.

I did, however, find my old BFF from High School on Fakebook. It turns out that she's been trying to find me for several years, but couldn't. It's probably because I didn't start my Fakebook account until after I was married, and I use my married name. She's also CF and loves her furbabies. She's a cat person! We are getting together on Sunday to chat about old times and catch up. She's a really awesome person and I can't wait to see her. We haven't seen each other in over twenty five years.
Re: Ex-boyfriend contacting me through friend and he's a breeder now!
March 29, 2018
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JohnDrake
Not sure what it is with some of these guys. My wife's first boyfriend from high school(she graduated in 1986) contacted her through Facebook sometime back. He had since been married twice and had just gotten out of a 5 year relationship and just wanted to talk. She told him that they could only be friends because she was married. He responded saying he should have married during the time they were together, which bothered me.

She told me about how she met him while working at McDonald's and how she thought he was nice but he only had one thing on his mind and considered her a challenge because she wouldn't put out. After one of the two proms they attended, he tried to force himself on her and she had to punch him to get him to stop. What finally ended it between them was he got another girl pregnant and even though he "took responsibility"(how much responsibility can a teen working at McDonalds take for a baby), she broke it off with him.

He tracked her down a few years later while they were in college and they tried to get back together. He wanted to still date around and she wanted more and of course, he wanted her to put out and she wouldn't. It finally came to an end one night when he hit on her best friend and exposed himself to her. She told him she never wanted to see him again. A couple of years later, he called her parents' home and she wasn't there, and he didn't call her back. That happened again a couple of years later and she told him to leave her alone, and she hadn't heard from him in years until Facebook.

It ended up with him being messaged that she had moved on and was happily married and didn't want to mess that up, as he was obviously looking for more. After that, he unfriended her and hopes this is the last she hears from him.

Wowww. You'd think in 32 years this guy would grow up but he sounds like the same jerk he was in high school. Somewhere in there you'd like to think the character would develop and mature.

It furthers the argument that many people go into arrested development and do not grow, mature or change much past puberty. Are they just already numb to life or do they have it easy enough that they don't have to grow up and mature?
Re: Ex-boyfriend contacting me through friend and he's a breeder now!
March 30, 2018
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JohnDrake
She told him that they could only be friends because she was married.

...Sounds reasonable.

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JohnDrake
...he tried to force himself on her and she had to punch him to get him to stop...

By the time I read that and everything subsequent, I was thinking no fucking way to any sort of interaction. Friendship is for people who act like friends. There's nothing to be gained from being friendly with an asshole.
Re: Ex-boyfriend contacting me through friend and he's a breeder now!
April 01, 2018
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yurble
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JohnDrake
She told him that they could only be friends because she was married.

...Sounds reasonable.

Quote
JohnDrake
...he tried to force himself on her and she had to punch him to get him to stop...

By the time I read that and everything subsequent, I was thinking no fucking way to any sort of interaction. Friendship is for people who act like friends. There's nothing to be gained from being friendly with an asshole.

I kind of thought the same way when she told me about him. She also told me she didn't date anyone for a long time(meaning a few years) after the incident with her best friend. Some people get involved with people that aren't good for them and they either don't leave or keep going back to them for some reason. It makes no sense.

I guess when he tried to friend her, maybe she was just trying to be polite and thought they'd exchange a few messages about what they were doing now and that would be it, but after the comment about wishing he'd married her, she realized what he was up to. She made it clear to him exactly where she stood with him and her marriage. He apologized saying he only wanted to talk and she responded when she needs to talk, she goes to her husband. A few days later we celebrated my birthday by having dinner at a nice restaurant and she posted a picture of it on Facebook. Shortly after that, he unfriended her and she changed her Facebook settings to block him from being able to contact her again.

I have a great wife.
Re: Ex-boyfriend contacting me through friend and he's a breeder now!
April 01, 2018
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mumofsixbirds
Holy crap, JohnDrake! The nerve of him! I'm so glad your wife decided to cut contact from him altogether. I am doing the same thing with my ex, because I don't want any drama in my life. I'm too busy trying to get my schooling done and work on my marriage, and I have no time for him or his antics.

I did, however, find my old BFF from High School on Fakebook. It turns out that she's been trying to find me for several years, but couldn't. It's probably because I didn't start my Fakebook account until after I was married, and I use my married name. She's also CF and loves her furbabies. She's a cat person! We are getting together on Sunday to chat about old times and catch up. She's a really awesome person and I can't wait to see her. We haven't seen each other in over twenty five years.

One reason I'm not on Facebook is there are many people from my past I don't want contact with anymore. From what I see on it, it just doeasn't interest me.

She described this guy as someone whom after high school, would pop up in her life every now and then. I tend to think he was still after her because she was the on conquest he couldn't make. If he had been successful in leading her away, once he conquered her, he'd have moved on, not caring about all the lives he'd ruined in the process.

I know a guy who had something similar happen to him. His wife of over 10 years got contacted by an ex-boyfriend on Facebook and they started talking and even after telling him to leave her alone, he contacted her again and eventually she left her husband to be with him. She learned he was the same cheating jerk he was years ago, left him, and tried to get her husband to take her back. He told her no and eventually decided to go no contact with her. After many sessions with a counselor, and some good luck, he got his life back together and has moved on from her and is dating a new lady who treats him with respect, as he does her. Hopefully things will work out with them, he deserves it.
I just wanted to mention that I met up with my old BFF from High School last Saturday night, and she's the same awesome person I remember from when we were kids! She's staunchly CF and we have so much in common after all of these years. We went out together that night and had an absolute blast. She's a bit on the wild and edgy side, but has a good head on her shoulders. Much like I remember her from before.

I haven't much thought about my old boyfriend in the last couple of weeks. It was just a weird 'blip' in my life, something I never thought would happen. I love my husband dearly, and while this guy may have been my first love, my husband is my true love.

I don't wish old boyfriend any ill will. I just don't want to get any more messages from him. If my other friend ever brings him up again, I'll just tell him that I'm not interested in hearing about him. He'll understand.
That's great that your high school BFF is still awesome. It's so nice when that happens. I have a couple friends from college like that, and one I've known since seventh grade...they're still smart, fun, loyal, and CF.
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