Can't adopt, so what about breeding?

Single, 40+ woman "considering her options", despite having Marfan syndrome, which would both make pregnancy dangerous and potentially be passed on to any offspring. However, this is a rare case where I don't entirely blame the person who is contemplating creating a suffering infant in order to fulfill their own desires, I put a lot of blame with the adoption agencies she responsibly tried to go to first. But once you try the sensible route and it doesn't work, it doesn't mean you should explore the senseless route.

Everyone needs to stop thinking of having children as a right. Condemning someone to a life of physical suffering based on your own desire is extremely selfish and cruel. (So, for that matter, is condemning someone to emotional suffering. There are so many people who are not qualified to raise children to become happy, productive adults.)

There will never be anything ethical about someone having a kid knowing they are passing on a life of suffering.

My uncle and his wife had no idea one of them had the gene for muscular dystrophy and my uncle's wife lives now as a 24/hour care giver to keep her 47 year old son out of the nursing home for as long as possible. She only gets breaks at all because she has many siblings who will help. If she dies he is in the nursing home the next day. How can this woman with Marfan's disease take care of another human she created like that and since she probably couldn't the taxpayer will have too all because she HAD to have a baybee

I have zero sympathy for people who have kids knowing they could pass on a disease like that. I agree she did the right thing going to adoption agencies first, but when they turned her down, that should have been the end of it. Obviously being a mother means more to her than the child's welfare does.

This sounds much more about ego and about proving she can do something others tell her she can't more than about having a baybee. Determination can be a great character quality but it needs to be tempered with reality.
Most of us figure out we aren't going to be rock stars or professional athletes while in our teens or our 20's at latest even if we can sing or are great at sports. The odds of her having a healthy child and giving it a good life are pretty much nonexistent.

What about fostering? If she fosters a bit she may find out very quickly she is going to have a very hard time keeping up with a kid with her advanced age for parenting and a disability. Can't help but think if she really wants kids she would already be fostering.

Hoping for the sake of the unborn that she is either sterile or in early menopause.

Quote
freya
What about fostering? If she fosters a bit she may find out very quickly she is going to have a very hard time keeping up with a kid with her advanced age for parenting and a disability. Can't help but think if she really wants kids she would already be fostering.

She did say she was looking at fostering, but felt that to some extent that you got all the work and none of the reward from doing it. (So it differs from parenting how?) I agree that fostering would be a good way to find out if she's even capable of dealing with a child. It's a shame all the adoption agencies just rejected her outright instead of proposing something like that.

She didn't sound like she really checked into fostering all that hard. And I agree her reasons for rejecting it are stupid. If her desire to have a child was altruistic, she wouldn't care if it was an older child, etc.

And she really is a dumbass to contemplate pregnancy. Connective tissue disorders are no joke--she could have an aortic dissection and lose her life.

plus, I bet you a million, she would have been able to adopt a "less than perfect" or older child--even with her medical problems. She just wanted a mini-me of the same race , and a newborn I bet.