Breeder on cracked.com

http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-underrated-and-selfish-benefits-parenthood/

admits to the selfish nature of parents

Not just selfish, but openly admitting to using the kid as an excuse for things like letting himself go, playing with toys again, getting out of having to do shit for other people and as a means to make friends (wtf?).

Not just selfish, but stupid as well. These reasons give you a lot of insight into the OP. Wanting an excuse to play with toys again tells me they aren’t comfortable in their adulthood. I don’t play video games any more because I have other stuff on my plate right now, but if I did, I would say ‘fuck yeah I play video games!’. I’d say I’m playing fusion frenzy on MY Xbox, over MY internet, on MY TV that I paid for with MY Money from MY job. I pay for my guilty pleasures {gadgets and chicken nuggets, I’m not even going to lie} with money that I earned at a job. I didn’t have kids, collect food stamps, and then sell them for 40% of their value to buy cigarettes or alcohol. {This is not me being holier than thou, I do enjoy lemoncello and ciroc, among others, this isn’t a dryness lecture}. Wanting to get out of doing stuff for other people is either selfish or weak. It’s good to help people when you can, if you can. But if you aren’t going to, just say it. Don’t make an excuse. My “life coach” told me “no,” is a complete sentence. Finally, having kids will not earn you friends. You’ll probably stop speaking to the CF / CL people in your life because you think they’re beneath you for not calving.

Lock him up or put him down.
Stolen from Shiny.

I like a lot of those things too, like my dollhouse and kid's oriented foods, but I never felt the need to sluice a brat just to be able to enjoy them. If I want to watch a movie that's kid-centric, not that I ever do, but if I did, I would do it whether or not I had kids. The fact that I don't have kids driving me crazy every day, allows me to do those things on my terms.

I usually have to share my sweet cereals with the birds, though. I can't eat a bowl of it without them climbing all over me, tossing Cheerios or Cap'n Crunch all over the kitchen floor. It can be a fiasco, lol.

I see no reason to give up fun stuff just because you become an adult.

On the other hand, if you choose to have kids, I think you should be a responsible parent and raise a decent human being. If that means giving up your fun stuff, then you should have thought about that before you decided to have kids.

I've given up most of my fun stuff, all except my PC/Internet, because I'm in so much pain there is no fun anymore.

I'm thankful I don't have kids because they'd make my life worse. At least I can lay in if I feel the need.

+++++++++++++

Passive Aggressive
Master Of Anti-brat
Excuses!

I don't understand why adults have to have children in order to do what they consider childish fun things. I work a fulltime job, pay all my own bills, live in my apartment, and goddamn right I play video games. I dont see anything wrong with it
And besides, what is considered an "adult" fun thing anyway? As opposed to kids fun? Alcohol and sex? Because o can't drink and I'm asexual so what does *that* leave me?

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saltyhealer
Because o can't drink and I'm asexual so what does *that* leave me?

Having fun playing video games! (I'm a gamer, too. I have no intention of ever giving it up.)

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saltyhealer
I don't understand why adults have to have children in order to do what they consider childish fun things. I work a fulltime job, pay all my own bills, live in my apartment, and goddamn right I play video games. I dont see anything wrong with it?

I'm into cosplay, but haven't done it much lately. When I was really active at it, a friend of mine said "you should have a kid, then you could dress them up in cosplay too." I just said to him "I don't need a kid to cosplay with, that's a really dumb reason to have a kid." He just laughed at me.

I watch anime and cartoons, I buy lego sets, I go into toy stores, I play video games; I don't need a kid to do that stuff with because I'm secure in my adulthood - I don't have anything to prove. People who have kids to justify doing fun stuff are pathetic.

That whole article was nothing more than a My-Dick-Werx self-stroking session. I suppose it will appeal to people who can't think of anything else to do with their lives other than to follow the LifeScript.

"I don't understand why adults have to have children in order to do what they consider childish fun things. I work a fulltime job, pay all my own bills, live in my apartment, and goddamn right I play video games."

DAMN STRAIGHT!

It amazes me when adults who pay their own bills still feel obligated to do X Y or Z or to have children because society expects them to, or their parunts or SkyDaddy. Lemmings.

People who are all excited because they get to play games, Lego, etc because they have kids now: I alternate between laughing at them and feeling sorry for them. I love playing video games, my desk has a toy shelf filled with Playmobil, Lego, a Crazy Cat Lady action figure (comes with six cats!), and several wind-ups. I go to batting cages, I draw for funsies, and I have no qualms about telling anyone who looks askance about these things to fuck right off.

I know what things I like, and when I have the money and time for them, I do those things. I pay for them myself, my hobbies harm no one, and if you lack the intestinal fortitude to own your wants and desires that's your problem.

People who use their kids as an excuse for finally doing things they enjoy spend too much time worrying about what others think.

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saltyhealer
And besides, what is considered an "adult" fun thing anyway? As opposed to kids fun? Alcohol and sex? Because o can't drink and I'm asexual so what does *that* leave me?

Aye! Fellow ace here! I feel the same way. There are only a couple of ‘adult’ things I like, and those are only ‘adult’ in the sense that they require money, and when I was a child I wasn’t earning money.

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lurker-derp
don't need a kid to do that stuff with because I'm secure in my adulthood - I don't have anything to prove.

My words exactly! If you’re comfortable in your adulthood, you shouldn’t have to justify any of your harmless habits.

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randomcfchick
love playing video games, my desk has a toy shelf filled with Playmobil, Lego, a Crazy Cat Lady action figur

Aww! I was waiting for this comment! I didn’t play with legos really, I was really into Playmobile. I guess a person’s CF status can be hinted at in childhood. I had one Playmobil of a mother and child, and the rest were animals {I had the Bernese mountain dog, the golden retriever pups, the police horse, and the rabbit hutch}. All the rest were pirates or acessoris as for the animals. I wonder if studies have been done across the lifetime of individuals correlating what they play with as children and their states as adults. {I say states not lifestyles, because I don’t believe sexuality / CF status are lifestyle choices, but that they are inherent}.

Lock him up or put him down.
Stolen from Shiny.

I read (not as much as I did as a kid), hike, am active outdoors/indoors, play games, eat mac and cheese or pizza at times, and play outside in the garden with dirt and flowers.

Playing is a necessary distraction after working, keeps me healthy, balanced and is relaxing.

Doing fun stuff is only for kids? Ha ha ha. No.

I read an article recently about a study showing there are quite a few men who will order different foods depending on whether they have time to think about it or not. If asked to choose quickly, they'll pick what they really like to eat, but if given time they will opt for the more 'manly' option (more meat, less veg). They must be amazingly insecure about their masculinity if they think it doesn't enable them to drink a cocktail or eat a vegetable dish if that's what they prefer.

Breeders have kids because they want to play with toys seem exactly like that. They are so insecure about adulthood that they worry about how others will perceive them if they do what they like without providing an excuse.

It's pathetic when people's decisions are so governed by public opinion that they can't bear to be different in any way.

@ Yurble

Oh, sheesh, the cocktail thing. I will never understand why guys are so adamant that they don’t drink typically ‘feminine’ drinks. Besides the fact that they taste delicious, most feminine drinks are a combination of alcohols, and they are alcohols with a higher ABV than beer. There are guys though that think they’re girly and won’t drink them, and instead stick to their fizzy toast beverages, all while pounding their chest and thinking their hard for drinking 3% ABV beer. :/

ETA: I’m not trying to bash people that like beer. I personally think it tastes like fizzy toast and smells offputting. But the good thing is it’s all a matter of taste so people who don’t like it don’t have to drink it and people that love it can. What I object to is people thinking their ‘hard,’ manly,’ or whatever by refusing to drink anything sweet, fruit flavored, or dessert flavored.

Lock him up or put him down.
Stolen from Shiny.

yurble, that study sounds fascinating. People are so strange about making choices.

Re: "girly" drinks...my husband and I often go out for drinks with friends, and our friend "J" and my husband both tend to order "girly" mixed drinks. We've talked about it and they both have a good laugh. J's favorite is called a Pink Panty Dropper (and yes, it's bright pink), but sometimes he orders a Greyhound. There was actually once a conversation that went like this:
Other person in the group: "J, why do you always get those?"
J: "Have you ever tried one?"
OPIG: "No, they're pink"
J: "Pink and fucking delicious. Your loss."

contemplativeintrovert: my 2 siblings and I grew up playing with Playmobil. We had several sets--hospital, wild west, knights, farmers, etc-- but they all wound up mixed together in a couple plastic washtubs in the downstairs TV/family room. We used pieces interchangeably and pretty creatively for all kinds of things. In a lot of ways I preferred it over Lego. I remember being vaguely annoyed when Playmobil came out with "kid" figures. I thought "Well if I wanted that I'd just play with dolls".

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yurble
I read an article recently about a study showing there are quite a few men who will order different foods depending on whether they have time to think about it or not. If asked to choose quickly, they'll pick what they really like to eat, but if given time they will opt for the more 'manly' option (more meat, less veg). They must be amazingly insecure about their masculinity if they think it doesn't enable them to drink a cocktail or eat a vegetable dish if that's what they prefer.

I agree, that's fascinating, but it also sadly makes perfect sense.

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randomcfchick
yurble, that study sounds fascinating. People are so strange about making choices.

Article on why men can't eat bananas whole and other stupid examples of fragile masculinity. The study is mentioned midway down the article:

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A 2010 study, Real Men Don’t Eat Quiche, found that when men have to make a snap decision about what they consume, they choose whatever their intrinsic preference is, even if it’s coded “feminine”. They’ll opt for that tasty pink drink at the bar instead of a more manly-seeming whiskey, for example.

When men have more time to consider a decision, however, they start thinking about the social implications of transgressing gender norms, and choose something that conforms more to a masculine gender identity. They’ll order the whiskey even if that isn’t really what they want.

Wow, yurble! Thanks for sharing that.

@Randomcfchick

Aww! That’s awesome . And I agree about the kid figures. All I wanted was a managerie of animals for my ‘character’ for lack of a better word, because it’s how I wanted to live in real life back then. I mean, I still would want to have a mangerie now, but now that would be contingent on winning the lottery or some other massive influx of income.

@yurble

Interesting! Thank you for sharing that. My question is, why? That is, why do some men make the choices they do, not why did you post. Maybe my asexuality skews how I view gender issues. For most people, sexual relationships and romantic relationships seem intertwined, and for non-aro, repulsed aces like myself, that is not true. Furthermore, from my laypersons understanding, gender issues seem tied into sexuality. Ex, how girls are expected to play with dolls / be nurturing because girls are “supposed to” be caretakers, and boys are expected to play football / be masculine because boys are “supposed to be providers.” Is this aversion some guys have to doing typically feminine things an offshoot of that? Is it thinking being feminine will make them unable to find a partner? That just confuses me. If I had a qpp, their liking “feminine” drinks wouldn’t bother me. I’d be ‘like fuck yeah, let me make us a fruity / chocolatey little cocktail and we can rant about life.’

Lock him up or put him down.
Stolen from Shiny.