https://www.boredpanda.com/funny-reasons-kids-cry/

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That's 40 "funny" reasons why kids have thrown tantrums, as told by their handlers. These pictures made me itchy with anxiety and I didn't even have to listen to the crying. I'm sure the parents think it's hilarious because what other choice do they have but to laugh it off? They can't get away from this shit, so they have no choice but to laugh.

I couldn't deal with this crap, I'd be throwing these little fuckers down the stairs. Yeah yeah, I was a kid once too. Doesn't mean I find this shit endearing.

I kept imagining myself saying, you want something to cry about? I'll give you something to cry about.
Can't imagine finding any of this funny or cute.

There are enough adults who push boundaries that I have to interact with regularly. It doesn't become palatable because it comes from a small person who has the social skills of a moron.

Love this interchange:

Child free person "Kudos to anyone patient enough to raise children. I'd probably go insane"

Parent of the year reply "You get really good at ignoring stuff. Like, 90% of parenting involves ignoring your kid."

I ignore at least 90% of kids universally, does that make me a good child free parent?

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I kept imagining myself saying, you want something to cry about? I'll give you something to cry about.

I absolutely cannot stand to be around the little fuckers when they are in the id stage, which lasts what? maybe five years? Sometimes forever when they are not properly parented. They are ego-centric little fuckers and they are the center of the universe. It's all ME ME ME: me grab, me do, me want, me get NOW and I'll scream like a little demon if I don't get my way or even for no reason as demonstrated in the link.

Screaming because they cannot eat dog food or poop or you won't let them abuse an animal? Screaming because you are doing something for them? Screaming because you aren't doing something for them? I too would want to pitch them down the steps. This is what parents sign up for, dealing with screaming, irrational small humans. FOR YEARS. (SMUG ALERT: Yes, I was too smart for that and I love this page where I can say it, loud and proud.)

There is horror in the unsocialized human. John Rosemond says, be very glad kids are small because who could possibly deal with a fully-grown, hulking human with the mind of a two year old? Our fyoooooture is autards and brats who are never told no.

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freya
Parent of the year reply "You get really good at ignoring stuff. Like, 90% of parenting involves ignoring your kid."

That's definitely obvious by the number of parents who manage to tune out screaming and shit diapers. I guess you can get used to anything given enough exposure to it.

You know every single new parent has this rosy vision of their children. They'll look exactly like their parents, they'll sleep through the night and be perfect angels with minimal to no effort on the parents' part to make the that way. So when the kid comes out looking like creepy Uncle Bill, screams bloody murder all night for absolutely no reason at all, and turns into a violent selfish brat, all Moo and Duh can do is laugh, cry, and drink to cope.

I get crying for a legit reason like falling down or losing a favorite toy. Those make sense, and I get that kids make a big deal out of dumb shit, but I'd still be sympathetic under those circumstances. But crying because Bratleigh wanted his milk in the green cup and then throwing a shitfit when you do exactly as he asked would earn Junior a slap across the ass from me. I'm also in the "stop that crying or I'll give you something to cry about" camp - I'm pretty sure if I had to deal with these picky screaming brats, they wouldn't be able to sit down by the time I got done with them.

and, if you listen, you can tell real crying from the phony crying.

I heard one (poor) kid crying in a theatre because its ear hurt. I could hear the genuine hurt. Did moo care? Not a damn. heard her tell the kid to shut up. don't think it really could and eventually they left.

stupid moos.

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.

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twocents
and, if you listen, you can tell real crying from the phony crying.

I heard one (poor) kid crying in a theatre because its ear hurt. I could hear the genuine hurt. Did moo care? Not a damn. heard her tell the kid to shut up. don't think it really could and eventually they left.

stupid moos.

Oh definitely. You can always tell when they unleash the crocodile tears because it's that face-contorting moany whine noise or it's the piercing high-pitched screech that's generally accompanied by a kicking and screaming full-body floor tantrum. They do this crap because they know their idiot parents will take the bait and give in to their whims, but I bet they'd learn to knock that shit off in a hurry if every time they fake cried, they got a smack. But people don't do that now because they prefer to employ ineffective bullshit gentle discipline methods with their rotten brats spirited angels.

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bell_flower

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I kept imagining myself saying, you want something to cry about? I'll give you something to cry about.

I absolutely cannot stand to be around the little fuckers when they are in the id stage, which lasts what? maybe five years? Sometimes forever when they are not properly parented. They are ego-centric little fuckers and they are the center of the universe. It's all ME ME ME: me grab, me do, me want, me get NOW and I'll scream like a little demon if I don't get my way or even for no reason as demonstrated in the link.

Screaming because they cannot eat dog food or poop or you won't let them abuse an animal? Screaming because you are doing something for them? Screaming because you aren't doing something for them? I too would want to pitch them down the steps. This is what parents sign up for, dealing with screaming, irrational small humans. FOR YEARS. (SMUG ALERT: Yes, I was too smart for that and I love this page where I can say it, loud and proud.)

There is horror in the unsocialized human. John Rosemond says, be very glad kids are small because who could possibly deal with a fully-grown, hulking human with the mind of a two year old? Our fyoooooture is autards and brats who are never told no.

Five years of that? Had no idea. That is thousands of time worse than I thought (terrible twos or threes). There is no way I'd make it. So happy I avoided a prison sentence for infanticide or neglect for shoving a kid in the closet by remaining child free. Kids testing the limits with boundary pushing is something I won't tolerate, it is bad enough with adults who boundary push that are in your life and difficult to avoid.

ITA. Well said, all of you! Is it just me, or are most of those kyds butt-ugly along with their behavior? Damn, I couldn't stand that for any length of time, much less five years.

Yesterday, the two youngest neighbor kyds had a screaming match over a toy. It sounded like someone was being tortured. Mawm had to pull the toadler away from the baybee, saying “No, no no!” It’s always the same knot head too, and he’s about three. Nope, that’s not for me.

Ugh, how annoying. I couldn't stand that shit for any amount of time. I don't ever remember crying for any of those reasons. My mother would've tossed me off the balcony if I behaved like that.

There are NO funny reasons why kids cry. They cry because they're either in pain or they're tired, or they are spoiled rotten brats that shriek because they can't get their way. Neither of those reasons strike me as particularly 'funny'.

God I fucking hate small children. They always scream and shriek over the dumbest shit. It makes me want to strangle the little bastards

Stop bringing up old posts from years ago - nobody remembers the thread or wants to read it to refresh their memory. There are only a few epic posts that are still remembered, years after they were written. Stick with recent threads (last 1 month or so).

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yurble
Stop bringing up old posts from years ago - nobody remembers the thread or wants to read it to refresh their memory. There are only a few epic posts that are still remembered, years after they were written. Stick with recent threads (last 1 month or so).

Oh alright… Sorry about that

Well, this does remind me when this rather undescript average looking guy at work grew a very hot beard while camping/fishing trip
(IMO changed his whole look for the better), then came home to his fam and his daughter cried (becuz she didnt really recognize him).

He shaved it off.

I said you shaved it off? becuz your daughter.....?
He just shook his head like he didnt want to explain the obvious to me, that "I just don't understand what u do for your kid"

But I DO undersstand that kid ruled the roost and he didnt want to get rejected by own kid. I mean he musta had it one day at home, he came to work w/ it one day, so that was at least two days, I mean really now...didnt kid get used to it?????????? Did she really think it was a diff guy interacting w/ family, and the dad still wasn't home? I thought kids "missed daddy' when he was away, or is that a myth?

I so wanted to say...."wouldn't this be the perfect time to EXPLAIN to her your the same person, etc etc etc?" I mean what if he went to the barber and got a buzz cut???? GawdForbid if you actually try to teach your kid the simpliest thing.

I'm getting old here, so the way I was brought up is so long ago it is almost foreign....but my gawd, maybe more ppl in modern times would not be looking for CFdom, if kids were PART of YOUR life, instead of being your life, giving them a little too much say in the family dynamic as an equal, which they are not, and as every passing decade goes by, making them the force that leads the adults instead of the other way around, then ending up w/ more entitlement and by all the studies, more depression and anxiety/suicides into young adulthood and adulthood.

I can imagine very few Dads of yesteryear doing this if they didn't want to.

Everyone had positive things to say about the beard. He musta felt good about it. But he and wifey musta convinced himself to do the 'right thing' for kid.

But I could imagine him posting on this article thread. Teary-eyed girl chyld.......Cried becuz dad came home with beard.