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Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices

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Cambion
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 04, 2022
According to Moo here, sometimes it's not just PPD making them feel like shit. Sometimes it's just the job of parenthood that sucks.

So then why did you take the job then??! It's not like needing to keep a roof over your head, so you take a horrible low-paying job with an abusive manager because you have to or else you'll be living under a bridge. Nobody has to breed! If you don't like your job, then leave it! I think this should include having brats.

If you are seriously unhappy with your decision to be a parent, then I honestly and truly do think it's best to give them to someone else - the father, the state, a relative, a friend, a gay couple who wants to adopt, the local Chester. What possible good can come out of being raised by someone who doesn't want to raise you? I know someone who voluntarily surrenders their toddler or their 7-year-old will probably be crucified by family and friends alike, but it's got to be better than someone who hates being a parent doing it because after a while, the parent grows tired of hiding their resentment and anger toward their kids and it will turn them into toxic people, which will result in fucked-up kids.

I don't care what any of them say, it is NOT possible to love your children and hate being a parent. I know there are days when they won't exactly love it, but if you hate your decision to become a parent, then you hate the outcome of that decision by proxy. I never once in my life said, "I hate my decision to get a cat, but I love my cat!" or "I hate how much effort cross-stitching takes, but I love the finished product!" If the final product is worthwhile, you don't mind the effort. Clearly the final product in the case of parents is not worthwhile.

I really think all Safe Havens should accept brats right up until the day before they turn 18. I don't know where they'll find the manpower to deal with the constant tsunamis of sprogs being abandoned, but surely it's better than someone being driven to the point of killing their own brats out of frustration.

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/xuloc1/its_not_always_ppd/

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Something that fucking enrages me is when a mother is complaining about how motherhood isn’t what they thought and how miserable they’ve become and everyone just says “it sounds like you have PPD you should get a therapist.”

Listen. I love my kids. I have been in therapy for years. I have been on antidepressants. I am trying so hard to enjoy this but sometimes it feels impossible. I make sure not to let my feelings about parenthood become apparent to my children, but I don’t love motherhood. Sure, it can be PPD but it almost feels invalidating to chalk it up to only a clinical depression.

Maybe, just maybe, some people don’t love being a parent and all that it entails. Maybe it’s not just hormones and sleep deprivation. It’s a shit job sometimes. You can love your kids to death but at a certain point some of us just aren’t LOVING the experience of raising children. I understand that it comes from a good place when people bring up PPD and it can be helpful because not everyone is aware of PPD and it’s real and it’s horrible.

But every time a mother is vulnerable about how hard it truly is or that maybe they regret having kids people jump straight to that as if “oh you’re just depressed, if you get a handle on that you‘ll be fine with the shitty day to day stuff that you’re bound to do for the next however many years.” Which isn’t fucking true sometimes. Years later and it’s not PPD anymore, this shit is just hard. If someone complains about their job it’s not just “oh you have depression.” Sometimes the job just fucking sucks!!! And that’s my mood for today.
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freya
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 04, 2022
I understand there are idiots out there who want to chalk everything up to PPD and can't accept that many people think parunting is a shit deal. These same idiots want to also invalidate the choices of the childfree. They also want to convince fence sitters that they should have brats. Lots of people on Reddit fall (fence sitters especially) into this category and I'm guessing it involves a high level of narcissism personalities. They do no one any favors and I despise the gas lighting and the divisiveness they foster in anyone who doesn't share their POV. For the worst narcissists parunting may well be "worth it" because they have smaller people they can control and that are a captive audience. It is very likely the parunt was raised the same way. A healthy person sees this as sick and twisted.

I appreciate the honesty of the childfree, regretful parents, etc. I don't appreciate those people who parunt (and very likely hide their regret) and play cloak and dagger games on anyone who doesn't enjoy parenting or who doesn't participate. If enough people speak out honestly than eventually the truth will come out, despite the narcissist's efforts.

People need to stop listening to those around them and make their own choices. It isn't always fun being unpopular but it beats being miserable and stuck for 20+ years of their lives. I just don't believe that there are adults in the world who have never been convinced to do something as a child and then regretted it. Somewhere in their childhood the school of hard knocks would have taught them to not fully trust others, most people are looking out for their own best interests and that everyone doesn't have honorable intentions.

If they think about people pushing them to have brats and shaming them if they seem confused (despite the prevalence of whining about them online) then it would make sense to question why those people care so much about other people reproducing. Learn to discern. And if they regret parunting, either suck it up and do a good job or put the brats up for adoption.

Since there are many resources for making informed choices on parunting I don't have much sympathy for them. There are much worse situations that do warrant sympathy because the choice was made by someone else: born into poverty, born into neglect/abuse, born with a fatal/painful illness or condition. And the only people who can prevent these situations are ironically parunts.
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Cambion
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 13, 2022
This is just a collection of vasectomy stories from the Moos because the author wants stories to feel better about how much her man-baby is whining.

But I'm looking more at the comments. Some women who basically said to their men, "I'm not taking the pill anymore, you figure out the birth control now" expecting them to get snipped like responsible adults and the women wound up pregnant because the guy refused to get it done or put it off, and they still fucked their husbands knowing they were completely unprotected.

Like do they really think a man who is minimally responsible for his own kids is going to be motivated to get the snip by his Moo-wife telling him she's going off the pill? And if the women don't want more kids, why are they throwing caution to the wind? This seems a little... ohh, what's the word... RETARDED.

Sorry Moos, passing the buck doesn't work with reproduction - if YOU don't want to get pigged up, YOU worry about the birth control. It's called being a responsible adult. Or just, you know, don't bang your husband. He'll probably get tail elsewhere, but that's not the point. God these women are stupid.

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/y20hin/vasectomy_woes/

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My husband told me he was going to make an appointment and never did. Reminded him constantly. I stopped taking birth control once I hit 35 because fuck that. Told him I wasn’t taking it. Reminded him to get the snip. Still didn’t take care of it. Condom broke and now we have baby #3. He was furious when he found out and even accused me of not telling him I went off the pill. Uh, no sir. Multiple conversations were had about this matter. I always wanted more kids so it worked out GREAT for me, I just really didn’t want to be pregnant again at 37.

I knew I was getting too old for a fourth and doubted he would take care of getting a vasectomy so I had my tubes removed.

That’s my vasectomy story that does not even involve a vasectomy.

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We got pregnant with our 3 (his 6th) while I was waiting for him to book his vasectomy. I said I was done with taking BC and now it’s up to him. LO is now 1 and after many many “discussions” he finally got it done. He keeps telling everyone how he regrets it and no man should have to go through that!
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twocents
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 13, 2022
I am reminded of a scene from St Elsewhere. A pregnant woman (8th or 9th kid) held up an OR with Dr Daniel Craig in it.. or another one... I really don't remember. She was pissed because her dick of an SO had had a vasectomy, or so she thought. Turned out the shithead had chickened out and said nothing. (side note, she shot the cassette player). I loved Dr CRaigs response when he found SO chickenshit had backed out... He told someone to set up another OR and to drag the chickenshit over for a vasectomy...

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
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Cambion
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 17, 2022
I understand that it's a medical procedure involving putting sharp pointy things into a man's most sensitive body parts and that there will be soreness afterward and that this is gonna make just about any man nervous. But for fuck's sake, it's not like the doctor is gonna give the guy a stick to bite down on and say suck it up as he fillets the dude's nutsack with a paring knife. You suffer a little bit, you take it easy for anywhere from three days to two weeks (because everyone does not heal at the same pace), you blow a load in a cup six weeks later to make sure it took and you will, ideally, have lifelong protection that you don't have to replace like condoms.

I know pain tolerances will differ between individuals, but I wonder how the pain of a vasectomy compares to the pain of an IUD insertion. Because men get their junk numbed prior to a vasectomy, don't they? I think some men can even be straight up sedated for it. Women don't get that when they get an IUD, they just get a hunk of metal jammed into their cervix and I've heard many women say the pain is absolutely horrible. It's the only reason I won't get an IUD myself - that, and the higher risk of expulsion because I have not given birth to fleshy potatoes.

But a lot of guys are insecure and think that being sterile will make them less masculine, because I guess masculinity and fertility are the same thing? shrug Frankly, I think a guy who willingly lets someone stab them in the groin is a lot more manly than a guy who bases his masculinity on his sperm count, but that's just me.

Another excuse is they're not sure if they're done having kids, even though I'd bet you anything any man who uses this excuse doesn't take care of the kids he's got in the first place. It's real easy to say you want kids (or more kids) when you aren't the one wiping their asses and getting puked on.
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hana
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 18, 2022
A friend mentioned getting a vasectomy was like getting kicked in the balls, though less painful than wisdom tooth removal. He had the procedure on Monday and back at work on Wednesday, he works in hospitality so weekends off isn't an option. The hardest part for him was finding a urologist that would schedule one for Monday.
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freya
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 18, 2022
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Cambion
But I'm looking more at the comments. Some women who basically said to their men, "I'm not taking the pill anymore, you figure out the birth control now" expecting them to get snipped like responsible adults and the women wound up pregnant because the guy refused to get it done or put it off, and they still fucked their husbands knowing they were completely unprotected.

Like do they really think a man who is minimally responsible for his own kids is going to be motivated to get the snip by his Moo-wife telling him she's going off the pill? And if the women don't want more kids, why are they throwing caution to the wind? This seems a little... ohh, what's the word... RETARDED.

This has got to be one of the dumbest things I've ever read.
And you know when the moos tell the duhs to figure out harmless things like:
  • "Babysitting" their brats for two hours so she can run errands
  • Make a basic meal (no dine out) for the brats
  • Take a brat to a dr. appointment
  • Do anything at all while the moo is ill/out of town
And he never does any of the above or does a piss poor job (moo comes home, there are pizza boxes everywhere, brats are wailing and there is pizza embedded in the carpet, duh passed out while watching TV) and moo has to clean up everything. But, she's hopeful that the man baybee will do something vastly more complicated and painful.

No way in hell a lazy man baybee is going to get a vasectomy!
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randomcfchick
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 23, 2022
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Cambion
But a lot of guys are insecure and think that being sterile will make them less masculine, because I guess masculinity and fertility are the same thing? shrug Frankly, I think a guy who willingly lets someone stab them in the groin is a lot more manly than a guy who bases his masculinity on his sperm count, but that's just me.

This is an excellent quote and I'm filing it away for future use.

BTW, vasectomies are less invasive and less risky than tubals, so guys who are so fearful of them can STFU. Women have a longer recovery time from tubals. Mr. Random had his done on a Friday (w/ local anesthetic), spent a couple days watching movies with his boys on ice, and went back to work Monday. Modern vasectomy incisions are teeny & they actually remove a segment of the vas to further reduce the chance of regrowth/recannelizing.
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Cambion
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 23, 2022
I mean it's not like the Duh has to perform the vasectomy on himself - he just has to make the appointment and show up for it.

It's just that going off birth control and placing the responsibility of contraception on the man seems like an idiotic thing to do when, between the Moo and the Duh, the Moo will suffer FAR worse consequences when the Duh inevitably does nothing. She's the one who gets pregnant and gives birth and will be expected to raise the resulting loaf, whereas it will have a minimal to non-existant impact on the Duh.

The Moos can't even say, "If I get pregnant because you're incompetent, you have to raise the baby" because the man-babies they marry will happily ignore and neglect their own children and then Moo will wind up taking care of them anyway. There are basically no consequences to the man in such cases if he chooses not to use protection, so there is no motivation for him to try to prevent pregnancy. You'd think the party that will be impacted the most by a pregnancy would exercise contraception themselves, but I guess I give these bizzy mommies too much credit.

Sure hope it's worth making an entirely unnecessary new human being to try and force a man-child into taking responsibility for his own health.
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freya
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 24, 2022
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Cambion
Sure hope it's worth making an entirely unnecessary new human being to try and force a man-child into taking responsibility for his own health.

I guess the moo made her point...and has to live with the aftermath...bathe it, take care of it, clean up after it, food and house it, chauffeur it. For the next 18+ years. That will teach the duh, next time he better be ready for the snip!
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Cambion
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 25, 2022
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randomcfchick
BTW, vasectomies are less invasive and less risky than tubals, so guys who are so fearful of them can STFU. Women have a longer recovery time from tubals. Mr. Random had his done on a Friday (w/ local anesthetic), spent a couple days watching movies with his boys on ice, and went back to work Monday. Modern vasectomy incisions are teeny & they actually remove a segment of the vas to further reduce the chance of regrowth/recannelizing.

It's my understanding that with modern vasectomies, they don't even use a scalpel sometimes. It's more like they just make the smallest puncture in the scrotum that doesn't even require any sort of closure because it's so tiny. Sure there will be tenderness afterward, but I think this method is done to help reduce the side effects of the procedure so recovery can be easier and faster.

And I know tubals can be done laprascopically now as well, but even then it's still more invasive than a vasectomy because I'm pretty sure the fallopian tubes are deeper in the body than the vas deferens. Plus it's a hell of a lot easier for men to get vasectomies, whereas in some places, women need a certain number of kids and the consent of their husbands to get tubals done.

I wonder how many men don't get them because they think it's like getting a dog neutered and they get their testicles cut off. I've heard of at least a couple instances of guys who were afraid to have it done because they thought it meant the loss of their nuts.

You'd think these women would say, "no more nookie until you're snipped, mister!" Not that that would stop some of them because I'm sure the loss of sex with their saggy, stretch-marked, unwashed wives and their vassholes is not worth the trouble of getting snipped and they'll just go get some tail from another woman.
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Cambion
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 25, 2022
Awtard husband and his meltdowns about fucking everything. Why the hell did this woman think it was a good idea to breed with someone like this? Oh, and of course she's pregnant again by this loon. Even if his kids are not autistic themselves, they'll probably ape his behavior sooner or later.

She is fully expecting to wrangle the new loaf when it comes out because she doesn't think her husband is in a good enough state of mind to take care of it. But oh, he's such a good father! eye rolling smiley Even though she also says that living with him and his awtism is stressful, exhausting and scary. The man can't handle putting a shirt on his own child without throwing himself into the wall and screaming because he's overwhelmed or overstimulated or whatever.

If he's got a mental issue of any kind, he has to be responsible for his own health and get it under control with therapy, medication or both. Not force his family to deal with his shit. How good of a father can he be when he throws bigger tantrums than his kids? God I'm exhausted just reading this fuckery.

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/ycjjax/autistic_meltdowns_in_husband/

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Okay bromos, I need your help. I’m posting this from an anonymous account because I don’t want any family or friends to link this to me, and because I want to respect my spouse’s privacy.

I’m struggling-big time. Over the last year, my husband has accepted that he has high functioning autism, and while I always suspected it (for so many different reasons) and am trying to be as supportive as possible, it’s been very difficult to hold down the fort with the kids (mainly babies and toddlers) over the last year.

For example, just this morning, he had a breakdown, over something relatively meaningless that his brain perceived as a threat (he didn’t want the secretary at school reminding him again that we need to finish post enrollment paperwork since she reminded him last week). I guess his brain took it as an attack and knowing that he might have to see her again this morning if our daughter was tardy pushed him into overdrive, I guess? We just got back from a trip so he had to search around for clothes and put things together for lunch as well so he was already stressed. You may wonder at this point why I wasn’t helping. I normally handle the clothes and lunch packing, but I’m hugely pregnant and so tired myself. Although I would have helped, no questions asked, if he had asked for help.

So continuing on, he came into our bedroom looking for daughter’s clothes in the laundry basket and I heard a loud bang. I immediately rushed out of bed (not easy with a bigass pregnant belly) and saw him on the floor in the closet. Initially, I thought he had fallen down, but he later told me that he threw his body down because he was so overwhelmed. I could tell he was overwhelmed, so I immediately went downstairs to help. I thought he had calmed down but then he insisted on helping daughter put on the sweatshirt so she wouldn’t be late. But……the sweatshirt was a little tight around the head and again, he lost it. He sort of hit or threw himself into the wall screaming. That’s when I knew he wasn’t in control and ran to kid to help and told husband to leave now and take a breather. I said it’s okay if you’re late dropping kid off but you need to calm yourself down right now. You cannot drive in this state. He yelled “being late is not okay” since I guess his brain was perceiving the secretary lady as a huge threat and he then threw a bottle off the counter. His actions seem aggressive but also sensory seeking, I guess? I don’t know. But he left.

So I know this isn’t healthy and it’s not normal. We talked about it later and I also understand that this is something he can’t control. He wasn’t diagnosed with autism as a child (and I imagine if he was, he would have better coping skills). Our current life is what it is. I’m sure you can understand that it’s not a piece of cake with young kids. And he is a great dad, and a good partner. Life is not anymore stressful than normal, but I know he’s lately been listening and reading a lot about ADHD and the Janet Lansbury podcast (he’s consumed by it), so I don’t know if that’s triggering all of this, or if it’s just because he’s more comfortable unmasking now. But bromos, I’m stressed out. How do we seek help? Can we even get help? Is he too old for an official autism diagnosis? Or do we just have to figure out coping skills on our own? That’s sort of what we’ve been doing lately since he finally allowing himself to feel and his “rules” and “principles” aren’t so rigid anymore.

But as the spouse, it’s exhausting, and quite honestly, downright scary at times. If he ever does get violent towards me and the kids, I will leave to a safe space for as long as we need to until he’s able to cope with professional help. Again, he’s a good person and he will do the right thing by us and I hope himself too.

I also don’t think I’ll be able to depend on him to help with the newborn, which is stressful for me because I know I’ll be so sleep deprived, but I don’t know if I can trust him to not accidentally fall asleep with the baby right now, and I feel that I can’t add anything more to his plate, because he literally can’t handle it. If an accident happens with the baby, I’ll never be able to live with myself. I also can’t depend on family to help and we have no friends in the area, so getting outside help isn’t an option.

I don’t even know why I’m posting this. I know it’s all over the place and my thoughts are probably not coherent. I guess I’m wondering if anyone here has some insight in any way. Thanks bromos.
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Ketchup
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 26, 2022
Good lord, this guy is the embodiment of weaponized incompetence. He has probably figured out that if he acts a certain way then wifey will leave him alone so he can do whatever it is he wants and avoid doing things he doesn't want to do. He's not even diagnosed with autism but it sounds like he found a way to act the part. And now she's accepting it as something he can't "control". What a mess. I'm sure she'll keep getting knocked up until her uterus falls out though.
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bell_flower
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 27, 2022
"Weaponized incompetence" is such a great word.

I know I sound like a Boomer Facebook meme, but Jeebus, these people who are using their diagnoses to wallow in victimhood and not grow the fuck up are so tiring. And they are teaching their kids to be that way.

Anyway, rant off and back to topic. The "I regret children" group on FB is a gold mine. Here's one who was 35! and old enough to know better and did it anyway. Whaaaaat....once you have a kid, you lose your leisure time? Who knew? playing a violin

And after having a gory and traumatic birth, her man asked her if they could have another one while she was still in the hospital? She needs to get her tubes tied and never look back but somehow these weak women always get talked into having another one.

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Wah
Hello all. It's great that this page exists. First of all I would like to say that English is not my language.

I am 35 years old and I have a daughter who is almost 1 year old. I don't really know where to start because I've never written down or explained these feelings I'm feeling.

When I was young, I always thought I wanted a lot of children and was seriously convinced of it. 2 yrs ago I met the father of my daughter and was convinced he will be the father of my children, it is time. Social pressure and family/environment also played a major role. I soon goe pregnant and something ahppened to me during that pregnancy. I hated it. I was do disappointed and it was not at all what I expected. It was a miserable 9 months. I didn't enjoy a second. I hated being pregnant. Nevertheless, I was happy that it was a girl and I did enjoy the perparation. Preparing the nursery, etc.

As the delivery approached, I became very scared. During this period I developed an anxiety disorder. Unfortunately, the deliver was disastrous and me and my daughter were almost gone. I'll spare you those details. Due to the delivery, I have several physical complaints and I'm struggling with PTSD for which I receive treatment.

Things have done downhill with my husband since the birth of our daughter. He has never taken my pain, grief and trauma seriously, which has created a great distance between us. He only had eyes for our daughter and on the second day after the birth, when I was still in the hospital, he asked me if we could try to go for a second one asap. My heart was broken.

As I recovered, I noticed that I had changed mentally and thought differently than before. I was very bitter. I argued daily with my husband about expectations of each other and he continued to not take my PTSD seriously. I didn't want to be a mother at all and I didn't want this man in my life anymore. But I had a problem: I felt a lot of love fo rmy child. But also so much guilt towards her. Why have a put sucn an innocent soul on this rotten world? How am I going to protect her from people who want to take advantage of her? And that thought makes me cry every time. will she blame me for leaving her father? And that I don't want to have a brother or sister for her?

The idea of being attached to a child also frightens me greatly. I can never leave without a care. I always worry about her when she is not with me and the result that she hangs on me 24/7 and even doing to the toilet is a luxury for me.

Now a year later the psychologist and psychiatrist have told me that I do not have postpartum depression. And I realize that now. What bothers me is "I just regret motherhood." I used to have a very carefree life. I did everything and traveled a lot. Was away with friends a lot and didn't want to settle down. Sometimes I would spend days on the cough binging a series and I could really enjoy something so small. Spent a lot of time on my appearance. That's all over. I am now a single mother who is just getting by. That's okay, because I'd rather stay alone then (sic) with a man who humiliates me and treats me like dirt and wants to use me as a birth machine. But motherhood. God how I hate it. I haven't slept normally in almost a year. Will it ever get better? I don't know. If I could do it over, I would never have had a child. But to never know what it's like to have a child again would haunt me for the rest of my life. So whatever you do, it's a misery. All I hope is it gets better someday. Until then I will do my best to let me daughter grow up to be a civilized child and I will limit the damage and I will stick to 1 child.
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bell_flower
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 27, 2022
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He's not even diagnosed with autism but it sounds like he found a way to act the part. And now she's accepting it as something he can't "control".

Double dipping because I'm feeling extra ranty today, but I worked with a guy whose kid had "autism" and this is a common thing now among professionals, that someone "cannot control their emotions" and needs allowances. My co-irker took their kid to all these "mental health professionals." He was diagnosed as being on the spectrum and he had all the alphabet soup diagnoses: ADHD, ODD, ADD. This kid was not the classically autistic--he could talk and I met him on several occasions and he was not stupid and he was cunning.

The standard "mental health" advice was to call the police on an 8 year old kid and for the rest of the family to escape to a "safe room" and just let him rage and trash their house. I wish I were even kidding. And if the kid "cannot control his emotions" why did he never hit someone bigger than he was? He was hitting his mom because he knew he could and there were no consequences.

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But as the spouse, it’s exhausting, and quite honestly, downright scary at times. If he ever does get violent towards me and the kids, I will leave to a safe space for as long as we need to until he’s able to cope with professional help. Again, he’s a good person and he will do the right thing by us and I hope himself too.

Ketchup is absolutely right--this weak female will likely just keep getting knocked up. This guy needs a dose of "grow the fuck up" and what a shame this woman had babies with him. You know, these women baffle me. They may have been dumbasses to pick this guy, but where is all this mooooooooooooooooooooooooooo-therly luuuuuv to protect something they carried around for nine months? Why do they want their kids to be around a screaming, potentially violent man-baby who goes off on trivial shit? No kid deserves that.
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Cambion
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 27, 2022
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bell_flower
Double dipping because I'm feeling extra ranty today, but I worked with a guy whose kid had "autism" and this is a common thing now among professionals, that someone "cannot control their emotions" and needs allowances.

I'm guessing it's also why so many (usually younger) people scream about their need for "safe spaces" at work and in schools because they don't want to be expected to control their emotions. Since autism is a spectrum, the boundaries of the various conditions that fall under the umbrella of autism are blurred, meaning if you doctor shop long enough, you will get an autism diagnosis.

Moo says the guy has been reading about ADHD lately and listening to Janet Lansbury (from what I'm seeing, she's an expert on parenting/discipline methods?) and he's probably using this to justify his behavior and has decided he "can't help" how he behaves and all those other sad sacks who live with him will just have to deal with him.

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Moo
If he ever does get violent towards me and the kids, I will leave to a safe space for as long as we need to until he’s able to cope with professional help.

Cope with professional help? So does that mean he is straight up refusing to seek help for his alleged autism? My guess is he's avoiding getting an official diagnosis because he doesn't really have autism. He's just an asshole who wants to blame a mental condition for his behavior and being told he isn't autistic would mean he has to actually act like a normal, responsible adult. He's probably learning how to be convincingly autistic reading about ADHD.
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Ketchup
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 28, 2022
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Why have a put sucn an innocent soul on this rotten world? How am I going to protect her from people who want to take advantage of her?...If I could do it over, I would never have had a child. But to never know what it's like to have a child again would haunt me for the rest of my life. So whatever you do, it's a misery.

Okay, two questions. So only breeding made her realize maybe it's not a great time to have a sprog? She sounds dumb. Also, "whatever you do, it's a misery"? So basically this is someone who is never happy no matter what. Fabulous idea to bring a kid into the world just because you might regret not doing it. No thought whatsoever about the conditions the kid might be brought into. Yep, typical breeder right here folks.
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yurble
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 29, 2022
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So continuing on, he came into our bedroom looking for daughter’s clothes in the laundry basket and I heard a loud bang. I immediately rushed out of bed (not easy with a bigass pregnant belly) and saw him on the floor in the closet. Initially, I thought he had fallen down, but he later told me that he threw his body down because he was so overwhelmed. I could tell he was overwhelmed, so I immediately went downstairs to help. I thought he had calmed down but then he insisted on helping daughter put on the sweatshirt so she wouldn’t be late. But……the sweatshirt was a little tight around the head and again, he lost it. He sort of hit or threw himself into the wall screaming. That’s when I knew he wasn’t in control and ran to kid to help and told husband to leave now and take a breather. I said it’s okay if you’re late dropping kid off but you need to calm yourself down right now. You cannot drive in this state. He yelled “being late is not okay” since I guess his brain was perceiving the secretary lady as a huge threat and he then threw a bottle off the counter. His actions seem aggressive but also sensory seeking, I guess? I don’t know. But he left.

I wouldn't even date someone who behaved like this, let alone marry and live with them, yet this woman has decided to have two kids with him. I'm always amazed that women can have such incredibly low standards. If incels stopped expecting women to look like supermodels, they could probably have their pick of women with no discernment or self-esteem who are willing to put up with any amount of shit.
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freya
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 29, 2022
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yurble
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So continuing on, he came into our bedroom looking for daughter’s clothes in the laundry basket and I heard a loud bang. I immediately rushed out of bed (not easy with a bigass pregnant belly) and saw him on the floor in the closet. Initially, I thought he had fallen down, but he later told me that he threw his body down because he was so overwhelmed. I could tell he was overwhelmed, so I immediately went downstairs to help. I thought he had calmed down but then he insisted on helping daughter put on the sweatshirt so she wouldn’t be late. But……the sweatshirt was a little tight around the head and again, he lost it. He sort of hit or threw himself into the wall screaming. That’s when I knew he wasn’t in control and ran to kid to help and told husband to leave now and take a breather. I said it’s okay if you’re late dropping kid off but you need to calm yourself down right now. You cannot drive in this state. He yelled “being late is not okay” since I guess his brain was perceiving the secretary lady as a huge threat and he then threw a bottle off the counter. His actions seem aggressive but also sensory seeking, I guess? I don’t know. But he left.

I wouldn't even date someone who behaved like this, let alone marry and live with them, yet this woman has decided to have two kids with him. I'm always amazed that women can have such incredibly low standards. If incels stopped expecting women to look like supermodels, they could probably have their pick of women with no discernment or self-esteem who are willing to put up with any amount of shit.

I once dated a guy who threw himself down because he was so "overwhelmed" that I said either make the time to see me each week or we're done. It was his non-verbal way of letting me know that I was expecting too much to see him once every two weeks for more than a couple of hours. I communicated to him (verbally) that he initially made the promise to see me regularly and weekly and had broken the promise repeatedly, he wasn't a victim and within a short period of time I broke up with him. My only regret was giving him more than one chance and dealing with the weird non-verbal fit. There was no throwing of anything except me tossing everything he gave me into the garbage. I saw him a couple of years later and was cordial; but had no desire to date him again. Then he started calling me, wanting to meet up and when I gave him an indication that I might agree to meet he immediately started claiming to love me so I declined meeting him and told him not to call me again. During the call he became butt hurt and played the victim yet again, it was so clearly attempted manipulation on his part. At least I didn't have to watch him fling himself down because he was "overwhelmed."

The good news about breakups that don't involve brats is that they are clean and if things do get messy a restraining order can be obtained, if needed. It is not so easy to break communication with a duh who is throwing a fit and close to impossible for a moo/duh to break communication with their brat. It may be possible to obtain a restraining order for a duh but then moo is stuck with the brats.
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yurble
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 29, 2022
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freya
I once dated a guy who threw himself down because he was so "overwhelmed" that I said either make the time to see me each week or we're done.

That is so bizarre. I can't imagine an adult acting like that. I mean, I suppose it is better than throwing things and punching walls, but only insofar as it makes the person seem like a toddler instead of violent. Normal adults do things like take a walk, hit a punching bag, etc to let off steam, and engage in verbal discussions with their partners over disagreements.
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twocents
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 30, 2022
This was found by someone on a reddit 'shitmomgroupssay'... I have gotten into a few fights with them because they still are placenta brains. I never cease to be amazed by these stupid sows who can't get it through their thick skulls that, for the most part, men don't want to do this kidshit. They want the men to play house... they snuffle around like lost puppies, whining and crying about shit that they want to control. If the guy doesn't want to go trick or treating they don't want to go. You let them stay home (especially if they are sick) and let them go. they married it, they spread for it, now it is on their stupid empty moo heads..

"I need to vent: I have spent months asking about and planning a trick or treat for my niece who is visiting. My husband announces he has flu just before we need to go. Takes his sweet time getting ready and we were epically late..as in we missed the entire thing. Luckily the sweet little girl that my niece is she got candy and she’s happy. But having friends phone you waiting for you to walk with them is mortifying. Next time better communication and management but wow. (Side note, why don’t you give up, stupid bint, and acknowledge you made a mistake and he doesn’t want to do this crap. Just wants to keep stirring the pot). I’m having a proper mental meltdown about it. I’m so upset I can’t even speak or cry. (boooohoooo mooohoooo. All about your little fantasy arrangement.. next time pick a better sperm donor)"

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
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Peace
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 31, 2022
The coments here are telling her to just suck it up and deal with it, she'll love it in a year or 10.

https://www.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/yhirxa/should_i_continue_parenting/

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Regretful MOO
let's start here i'm a 22 single black mother living in the south, little one is a soon to be 2 year old in december. i hate him. i really really don't like him or motherhood. i hate the body fluids, i hate him crying all day, i hate him moving around all day, i hate him touching me, i hate him begging for my food, i hate him falling out in public, i hate feeding him, i hate putting clothes on him, i hate playing with him. i genuinely don't like him. recently he bites me, he snatched a big bald patch on the side of my head, made my nail bleed and gave me the flu recently from daycare, (which i know isn't his fault but if he wasn't around i wouldn't have gotten sick). he doesn't listen to anything i say... he makes nap time harder than it should be. i hate sleeping in the bed with him... he cannot sleep in my bed. he puts food all over the house and marks up my walls. i'm ocd and just overall not built for mothering. Seriously considering having him adopted for both our safety & sanity.

THE BIGGEST FACTOR: I have 0 support system, no village. Completely estranged from all family been this way for years & baby daddy has never helped and will never help.

I want out.... Am I wrong?

Also I feel like kids need siblings which I am never giving him. I want him out of my life and for good.

side note: i don't abuse or neglect my son. i tend to all his needs i just don't want to be his mom anymore.


If she despises the kid that much then yes, she should give it up for adoption. However, being a black infant, the child most likely will languish in foster care. Why do people like this breed? And where is the father in all of this? Why would she willingly have a baby with a man who obviously doesn't want to be a parent?

It's always single, overworked, stressed out single mothers or women who married lazy ass men who don't lift a finger to help.
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Cambion
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
October 31, 2022
I saw that discussion as well, and I think the comments were already closed on it, so I'm guessing things were getting ugly.

The way I see it, this kid is fucked no matter what. If he is put up for adoption, there is a chance he will just fester in the system and age out at 18 because everybody seems to only want to adopt flawless white babies and no other age or skin color will suffice. Or he could be raised by his one parent who hates him for existing. He's going to be fucked in the head no matter which option she chooses.

Of course the kid doesn't fucking listen - he's a toddler. No toddler listens. This being the south, depending on how deep in the south we're talking, it's possible this woman had limited or non-existent access to abortion, but if she knew she didn't want him, why did she not surrender him at birth? If she has no family to bitch in her face for giving their grandchild/nephew/cousin to strangers, what was the logic behind keeping a clearly unwanted child?

OCD with a brat is not a good combination. I really really really do think adoption is the best option for this woman. The kid's life is already probably ruined because nobody wants him or will want him, but no sense ruining the Moo's life too. Hopefully she has learned to not breed with total wastes of skin and won't make another kid she doesn't want. If she doesn't surrender him, she'll probably start considering a PNA.
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twocents
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
November 01, 2022
not only that her friggin delusion that she isn't abusing the kid. it is entirely possible that bugger is picking up on the 'vibes' and that adds to his acting out and behaviour. I think these assholes think they'll be regarded as some sort of farkin martyr moo.

far too many people with mental conditions just go ahead and breed without a moments thought or hesitation. it will suck to be that kid

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
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freya
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
November 02, 2022
Quote
Peace
Why do people like this breed? And where is the father in all of this? Why would she willingly have a baby with a man who obviously doesn't want to be a parent?

It's always single, overworked, stressed out single mothers or women who married lazy ass men who don't lift a finger to help.

She was either deluded before having the brat or the duh pretended he cared or maybe threatened to leave if she aborted. Then again, she may be pro-life. It doesn't sound as if it was her famblee influencing her.

Lots of these regretful parunts have either famblee or duhs convincing them to have a brat or threatening to cut them off if they don't have the brat. I've read about one who was fine with her daughter adopting out the brat, then threatened to abandon her daughter if she gave her baybee up for adoption while she was in the hospital after having the brat.
If someone is willing to abandon a relationship based on not being able to force someone else to parunt they aren't worth having around. I see it as a form of manipulative abuse/control.

I guess I know the answer to this question but wouldn't those jerks feel bad any remorse about convincing a relative to make a permanent irreparable change in their life that they regret? Narcissistic jerks!
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