Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
Posted by twocents
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 18, 2023 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,753 |
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I don't care what the gender of our babies was I just wanted healthy little babies, but my husband was clearly excited for potentially three sons. When the time came me, my husband, and my brother all shot a confetti cannon and all three shot out pink confetti. I was so excited and so was my brother but my husband screamed at the top of his lungs and hit the table in front of us, hitting it so hard that it actually broke. He screamed at me that I was supposed to give him at least one son because I killed his first one.
That's when I burst into tears. I had been so broken up about our son's stillbirth and a part of me had felt it was my fault, and now he my husband was, the love of my life, telling me that it was. My brother immediately stepped in and tried to get my husband to calm down but my husband shoved my brother, so my brother instead pulled me inside where I cried in the living room while my husband's mother tried to calm him down. I could hear him screaming outside about how three daughters is too many, how he doesn't want four kids but he also wants a son.
I'm guessing these people believe the dinosaurs roamed the earth at the same time as people. And also lack basic knowledge of biology. Listen up missies: male sperm determines the sex of the baybee. Bio lesson two: a stillborn doesn't mean the mother killed the baybee. Just like miscarriages, stillborns happen. It isn't in control of the moo or the duh. Oh, and here we learn she married a man baby who is prone to violence and sounds like an abuser, but only if he doesn't get exactly what he wants.
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The moment my husband said I killed our son I felt as though I lost all love I had for him in an instant, and I don't want my daughters to be in that kind of household. However both my mom and MIL say it's just natural for men to want sons and that at least he isn't saying he'll mistreat them. They treated this as absolute fact and acted as though I'm just a silly little girl who doesn't know anything, I felt incredibly small and stupid.
I don't know what to do. My mother and MIL make me feel like maybe I'm overreacting to my husband's behavior, but my brother says this is not normal as he and his husband are both men who absolutely love their daughter. I'm also not sure of what I'll do with myself if I divorce my husband. I don't work and I'm not sure how I'll be able to find a job that can support me and three babies all on my own, or how I'll make time for all of them when I have to work. I feel so lost and helpless.
She needs to listen to her brother, who seems to be the only sane one in the family. And of course like a dutiful lil' fundie wommin she doesn't work and has no way to support any brats.
It would be a gift for her to miscarry as long as she still divorces this man baby.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 19, 2023 | Registered: 16 years ago Posts: 1,997 |
“Church on Sunday” was the first red flag in that one, followed up with how he OP’s mother cut off the brother after he turned out to be gay. OP needs to listen to her brother. Her mother and MIL sound like brainwashed trad wives who believe that “boys will be boys” no matter how abhorrent the behavior.
OP is going to end up as a statistic if she doesn’t leave, specifically the one about how homicide is the leading cause of death for pregnant women in the US.
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"Not every ejaculation deserves a name" - George Carlin
OP is going to end up as a statistic if she doesn’t leave, specifically the one about how homicide is the leading cause of death for pregnant women in the US.
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"Not every ejaculation deserves a name" - George Carlin
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 19, 2023 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
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However both my mom and MIL say it's just natural for men to want sons and that at least he isn't saying he'll mistreat them.
That's like justifying staying with an emotionally/mentally/verbally/sexually abusive husband by saying, "Well at least he doesn't hit me." It doesn't make it okay that this grown ass man threw a tantrum so hard that he broke a table and then shoved someone like a kid on the playground when they told him to act like an adult.
Also just because the prick doesn't come out and say he intends to mistreat his three daughters doesn't mean he won't. If he got that mad over not getting three sons, he will absolutely neglect those girls at the very minimum. At worst, he will abuse them for daring to be born without the preferred genitalia. He will also probably hound his wife immediately after giving birth to start trying to get pregnant again so she can give him a son. After all, in his mind, not only did she "kill" their first child, but she fucked up by giving him girl children. Hounding may turn into forcing himself on her if she doesn't cooperate because he feels he "deserves" a son.
I assume it's too late to abort if she's done a gender reveal, but the next best thing would be to get the fuck away from this psychotic man-baby. Abuse can start with hitting inanimate objects like tables and before she knows it, Moo and her kids will become tables to Duh. And of course she has no job, she became financially dependent on her husband like a dumbass. No one will hire her either if she comes in for an interview heavily pregnant. Employers aren't going to hire someone they know will take maternity leave and then be useless and under-productive IF they return to work.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 19, 2023 | Registered: 15 years ago Posts: 3,919 |
these males are so fucking stoopid. mom and mil says it's natural for the shriveled dicks to want a baby dick. and you know, there is almost no way of weeding these fucking retards out either. and blaming her for a stillborn?? frankly I'd throw him out that day and divorce him and take him for every penny he has and could provide
two cents ¢¢
CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!
No one is more arrogant towards women, more aggressive or scornful, than the man who is anxious (insecure..my word) about his virility. Simone de Beauvoir
people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong
Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children. The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.
Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.
People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke
Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
two cents ¢¢
CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!
No one is more arrogant towards women, more aggressive or scornful, than the man who is anxious (insecure..my word) about his virility. Simone de Beauvoir
people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong
Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children. The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.
Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.
People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke
Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 19, 2023 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 7,963 |
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LoveToLurk
“Church on Sunday” was the first red flag in that one, followed up with how he OP’s mother cut off the brother after he turned out to be gay. OP needs to listen to her brother. Her mother and MIL sound like brainwashed trad wives who believe that “boys will be boys” no matter how abhorrent the behavior.
OP is going to end up as a statistic if she doesn’t leave, specifically the one about how homicide is the leading cause of death for pregnant women in the US.
You took the words right out of my mouth. The church thing and the hatred of gay people was more than enough for me to realize that these women are the blissfully ignorant fundie types who exist in their own little righteous bubbles and have no concept of real life or the dangers that these types of individuals can be to their spouses or children.
I hope for her and the sake of the kids, she gets the hell away from him because I suspect this was the first angry outburst of many and will probably escalate to physical violence.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 20, 2023 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
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I hope for her and the sake of the kids, she gets the hell away from him because I suspect this was the first angry outburst of many and will probably escalate to physical violence.
Heck yeah, can you imagine how this asshole will react to three crying babies, particularly when they are of the wrong gender? This woman and the kids are in danger of getting their heads bashed in.
Her brother, the gay man, who probably isn't even considered a real man by these Fundy assholes, is the only one who has an idea of what a man and a person should be. Not surprising.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 20, 2023 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,753 |
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twocents
these males are so fucking stoopid. mom and mil says it's natural for the shriveled dicks to want a baby dick. and you know, there is almost no way of weeding these fucking retards out either. and blaming her for a stillborn?? frankly I'd throw him out that day and divorce him and take him for every penny he has and could provide
One way that may work is to get the guy talking about what he wants in children. Guys like this will talk about wanting a son and playing sports or whatever with the son. I don't know how many times my younger self had to hear what some guy friend wanted in kids because some fool asked him (usually a female fool who was a wannabreeder) and they almost always said this. I never once heard a guy say he wanted a daughter so he could do girly things with her. But I grew up in the Bible belt which is full of corn-fed bros. Most men who are not bros there are bro-wannabees. As if it is a choice anyways-unless they plan to coerce their wives into aborting every baby that isn't male! Unlikely in the Bible belt.
If the guy has had negative feedback from past girlfriends or has more experience with women he may lie and say any healthy baybee will be good.
The fact that they could lead a boy scout troop and guarantee themselves the opportunity to play sports or take boys camping never occurs to any of these morons. Much better to roll the dice, sluice and hope for a boy.
And the women never see it as a red flag that their potential life mate cares only about those Kodak moments.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 21, 2023 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
Manipulative little klepto at eight years old. Of course she's an awtard because what kid in that sub isn't a tard? Therapy doesn't help the brat because she's a good liar and convinces the therapist that she's a good kid who just needs to work on her feelings and her parents are just mean.
Of course everyone suggests more mental health treatments, but if the brat lies to therapists, what would the point be? Others suggest setting up cameras to catch her stealing shit. So what happens when the brat inevitably finds and steals the cameras? Because once she knows they're there, she'll look for them.
The "good for others, bad at home" thing sounds like narcissism to me because narcissists tend to have a public persona and a private persona. It makes the victims of their behavior look nuts when they try to explain how the narcissist actually behaves when they seem so perfect and sweet to everyone else. The little bitch even came out and said she's horrible to her parents because she knows they have to love her anyway.
Of course Moo had to go and breed with a mentally ill person. I don't know if BPD is borderline personality disorder or bipolar disorder, but I'm sure Princess inherited Duh's mental fuckery and she's just going to get worse.
https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/1801vhl/my_8_year_old_is_a_thief/
Of course everyone suggests more mental health treatments, but if the brat lies to therapists, what would the point be? Others suggest setting up cameras to catch her stealing shit. So what happens when the brat inevitably finds and steals the cameras? Because once she knows they're there, she'll look for them.
The "good for others, bad at home" thing sounds like narcissism to me because narcissists tend to have a public persona and a private persona. It makes the victims of their behavior look nuts when they try to explain how the narcissist actually behaves when they seem so perfect and sweet to everyone else. The little bitch even came out and said she's horrible to her parents because she knows they have to love her anyway.
Of course Moo had to go and breed with a mentally ill person. I don't know if BPD is borderline personality disorder or bipolar disorder, but I'm sure Princess inherited Duh's mental fuckery and she's just going to get worse.
https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/1801vhl/my_8_year_old_is_a_thief/
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My daughter is a thief. She has been for years. A lipstick from CVS, a crystal light squeeze thing from the grocery store, candy from someone at play practice. Mostly she steals things from home, thankfully, but it’s infuriating. I thought it was a phase when she was 4, then at 5 maybe we just weren’t handling it properly.
She got diagnosed with ADHD and has been medicated since 6. She’s impulsive, but it’s beyond normal. She steals food, we have to hide everything. Not just Halloween candy (which she learned to climb to the top of the refrigerator to get) but dumb things like a single plain tortilla, or hot chocolate mix. Today we discovered that she stole a box of thin mints from the cookies she is supposed to deliver to people. She said that she just loves candy so much that she can’t stop herself. We’d give her snacks and candy if she asked, and we always feed her obviously, but she barely eats what we give her. She prefers whatever she can sneak.
She stole all of my lipstick and used them to draw on things, and she chewed up my eyeliner. She took a ring and a watch from my jewelry box. I found her with a barrette my dad gave me when I was little, it’s one of the only things I have that he gave me before he died. I’d be devastated if it went missing, and half of the things she takes end up missing at school or somewhere else. I told her I’d get her makeup and jewelry if she asked, but she just wants to steal mine.
She lies and she throws fits and she screams at us. Recently she threw something in her room and then yelled at me and said “I can’t believe you just threw that!” And then maintained that I did it. I’m terrified of how this escalates and don’t know where it will end.
She went to therapy, but she’s so good for other people. She had the therapist convinced that she just needs to work on her feelings and anger and that we’re strict and mean. Her teachers think she’s so great and helpful. She’s excellent at Girl Scouts. She told me that she doesn’t want other people to “know how she really is.” And she says she’s awful for me and her dad because we’re her parents and have to love her anyway.
Her bio dad has BPD and treats his parents like shit and treated me like shit because he allowed me to see the real him. He’s an abusive drug addict. I’m having PTSD from the things she’s doing and saying, and I’m furious at myself for falling for his bullshit years ago and letting her inherit his issues. Nature is so much stronger than nurture with some of this and it’s killing me.
I don’t know what to do with her other than to put her back in therapy with someone new and make sure they understand what’s going on at home without her lying about it. She’s such a good liar, and so sweet to other people.
I don’t know how to stop her from ending up in jail, or ending up hurting people the way her bio dad did, or just not being a functional member of society. She is on a path of self destruction at such a young age and we’re trying so hard to stop her and redirect and prevent temptations and talk through it, but nothing is working.
I’m staring at the dark vast emptiness of the bay right now like there are answers in the lights of the boats in the distance. The water is my comfort place, and it’s not helping today.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 21, 2023 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,753 |
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Cambion
Manipulative little klepto at eight years old. Of course she's an awtard because what kid in that sub isn't a tard? Therapy doesn't help the brat because she's a good liar and convinces the therapist that she's a good kid who just needs to work on her feelings and her parents are just mean.
Of course Moo had to go and breed with a mentally ill person. I don't know if BPD is borderline personality disorder or bipolar disorder, but I'm sure Princess inherited Duh's mental fuckery and she's just going to get worse.
Well, we have this terrific invention called hidden cameras in 2023, why doesn't this bint set up a bunch of cameras around their residence so she can accurately show the behavior to those who can help instead of whining about how the famblee is the only ones to see it?
I don't know much about BPD but it sounds as if this kid could be hopeless unless there is some serious professional intervention. Once this kid is a teenager if this isn't contained you can pretty much assume there will be at least one teen pignasty if not several.
It is really easy to access criminal record summaries for anyone online, including the person you're considering as a partner. It sounds like the duh has a criminal record, so why didn't she check this out before sluicing with him? Now she is stuck with a kid who likely is also BPD (sounds like borderline personality disorder) and will likely always have impulse control issues.
Modern dating should include researching online criminal summaries and before sluicing should mean a full background check as well because that is an 18+ year commitment. Of course people lie especially criminals, and a background check can save lots of future angst.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 23, 2023 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 7,963 |
It's consequence time. She's great in girl scouts and enjoys it? That would be over. No questions asked. Moo needs to start giving consequences that she'll really feel.
If there's no stealing for a long period of time (like a year or two) she can possibly go back. The minute she's caught stealing again, it's over and no option to go back. She needs to learn the hard way. Of course I'm preaching to the choir, but if moo doesn't do something soon, her kid will be a lost cause. If she's manipulating everyone into thinking her moo is a jerk, she needs to find someone who will understand that her kid is a liar and thief. It all goes hand in hand so I'm surprised that these therapists are falling for it.
If there's no stealing for a long period of time (like a year or two) she can possibly go back. The minute she's caught stealing again, it's over and no option to go back. She needs to learn the hard way. Of course I'm preaching to the choir, but if moo doesn't do something soon, her kid will be a lost cause. If she's manipulating everyone into thinking her moo is a jerk, she needs to find someone who will understand that her kid is a liar and thief. It all goes hand in hand so I'm surprised that these therapists are falling for it.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 24, 2023 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
The kid says she doesn't want people to know how she really is. Maybe Moo can catch the little bitch on hidden camera and show footage of her stealing and throwing huge tantrums to everyone she knows. Or simply threaten to show it to people, but keep the video in a safe place so she can't access it. Maybe the threat of revealing her true self to the world would be enough to keep her ass in check?
The kid may already be a lost cause. Medical intervention only helps if the patient admits they have a problem and actually wants help. If the brat is lying to therapists who are too dumb to see through the facade, she obviously does not want to be helped. Someone who is manipulative will not respond to therapy, or even worse, they often find ways to weaponize things they learn in therapy.
Moo might have to just chalk this kid up as a failure and let her get arrested when she gets older because you know she's not going to stop. Let her face some legal consequences and don't bail her out. The kid sounds like she's probably smart too, which makes it worse because high intelligence and mental illness is often a problematic combination that's difficult to treat.
I don't see any mention of spanking. Can't Moo smack her ass when she steals shit? Or smack her hands with a wooden spoon since she's a thief? She definitely needs to lose privileges and possessions for her thieving like you said, Mum - no more Girl Scouts, also no TV, no computer, no tablet, no video games, no sleepovers, no extra-curriculars, whatever. Any possessions removed from her need to be kept in a safe or something so she can't take them back (or sold to someone else). Install security cameras to catch her in the act. The only downside is some kids are particularly stubborn and can have everything taken away, but will still misbehave. After all, at that point, they have nothing left to lose, so what's the point in behaving?
Or, better idea: send the little cunt to live with her shitty father! Give him full custody and pay child support and never see the little bitch again.
The kid may already be a lost cause. Medical intervention only helps if the patient admits they have a problem and actually wants help. If the brat is lying to therapists who are too dumb to see through the facade, she obviously does not want to be helped. Someone who is manipulative will not respond to therapy, or even worse, they often find ways to weaponize things they learn in therapy.
Moo might have to just chalk this kid up as a failure and let her get arrested when she gets older because you know she's not going to stop. Let her face some legal consequences and don't bail her out. The kid sounds like she's probably smart too, which makes it worse because high intelligence and mental illness is often a problematic combination that's difficult to treat.
I don't see any mention of spanking. Can't Moo smack her ass when she steals shit? Or smack her hands with a wooden spoon since she's a thief? She definitely needs to lose privileges and possessions for her thieving like you said, Mum - no more Girl Scouts, also no TV, no computer, no tablet, no video games, no sleepovers, no extra-curriculars, whatever. Any possessions removed from her need to be kept in a safe or something so she can't take them back (or sold to someone else). Install security cameras to catch her in the act. The only downside is some kids are particularly stubborn and can have everything taken away, but will still misbehave. After all, at that point, they have nothing left to lose, so what's the point in behaving?
Or, better idea: send the little cunt to live with her shitty father! Give him full custody and pay child support and never see the little bitch again.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 24, 2023 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
This post is from seven months ago.
There is a part two--can you guess what it is? She's not pregnant YET, but yes, she did marry this guy approx. one month after she posted post #1. Naturally she's like 21 or 22 and already married.
Title: Is this domestic abuse or am I being dramatic?
link:
https://www.reddit.com/r/domesticviolence/comments/1373y1p/is_this_domestic_abuse_or_am_i_being_dramatic/
posted yesterday, seven months after post #1. She married him of course. She's three hours away from family by plane. Hopefully she has a family that gives a shit (unlikely because on many levels she's putting up with this guy's shit) and she can just go home and not to back.
Title: Am I the AH in my marriage?
https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/comments/1829ycy/aitah_in_my_marriage/?sort=controversial
There is a part two--can you guess what it is? She's not pregnant YET, but yes, she did marry this guy approx. one month after she posted post #1. Naturally she's like 21 or 22 and already married.
Title: Is this domestic abuse or am I being dramatic?
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This may be a long post, so I apologize in advance. I just need clarity on a situation that happened with me and my fiancé. Basically we got into an argument over the dress code for our upcoming wedding. I told him I was done talking about it, so we were silent in the car as he drove us home. He turned the radio up loud and I asked him to turn it down some, which he wouldn’t. So I turned it down myself. He pulled the car over into a neighborhood, got out, said he was done with this sh*t, and left me there in the passenger seat. I tried calling him to take him home because he had work in a couple of hours, but he didn’t answer. I texted him. I checked his location, which he had conveniently turned off so that I wouldn’t know where he was. So I went home. He showed up not long after, so I went out for a drive and waited for him to leave for work. I get back home to find out he’s removed me from social media and taken our pictures down, including our engagement post. So I go inside, pack my things, and tell him it’s over, because this isn’t the first time he’s done this after a fight. Maybe it was over dramatic on my part, but I was just so fed up. I also messed up by telling him “fuck you.” I was disrespectful, and there’s no excuse for that other than I was just really hurt. I told him I wouldn’t be there when he got home from work.
Fast forward to when he gets home from work, and I’m still at the house - I had fallen asleep on the couch because I wasn’t feeling well. When he got home he came up to me and woke me up, asking why I was still there. I told him I would leave in the morning, that I wasn’t feeling well. I told him I wanted to fix things, but he didn’t want to talk. He said I could either sleep in the bedroom or on the couch. I told him I’d sleep on the couch, but then he shut me out of the bedroom, to which I asked him to just leave the door open. He wouldn’t. So I went in and got on the bed and said I would prefer to sleep there instead. He left me by myself in the room so I locked the door. He came back and got mad and told me there would be no locked doors in his house. I told him it’s my house too, that my name is on the lease. He said that’s not true because he pays the bills. Some backstory on that- he told me to quit my job and that he would provide for me financially while I take care of the home. So him saying that was a slap to the face. He told me if I went to court, they wouldn’t give me the house since I don’t make payments on it. He said since I locked the door that I abused my privilege of having the room, so he yelled at me to get out of the house and leave. I told him I had nowhere to go because my family is three hours away, and it was already 1am. He said he didn’t care and to just get out. He said I could stay on the couch, that he would be nice enough to give me that. I didn’t leave the bed, so he started lifting the mattress up with me on it. I begged him to stop and said he was going to hurt me, to which he said it was my fault for being stubborn and to just get off the bed. I didn’t, so he ended up knocking me off the bed when he pushed the mattress completely off. He said I was being dramatic when I told him he hurt me, and that it was my fault for not listening. I feel like he’s right - I didn’t help matters by being so stubborn. He said women like me try to ruin men’s lives when it comes to stuff like that. He told me to call the police and file a report if I thought what he did was so bad. I told him I wouldn’t do that.
I ended up having an anxiety attack, so he eventually comforted me. But anytime he came near me I would flinch, which only made him more upset with me because he couldn’t understand why I was doing that. Today, as he was leaving for work, he called me a psycho as btch and told me he wouldn’t talk to me until I received therapy. He said “I don’t believe in therapy most of the time, but I feel like certain people do need it and that person is you.” I feel so confused, yes I messed up in this situation too but I don’t think it’s fair that I’m the one getting blamed for everything. Why am I the only one trying to fix it when he’s the one that hurt me too? If you took the time to read this all the way through, thank you. If anyone has any advice or words of wisdom, or can just help bring some clarity to the situation, I’m more than willing to hear it. I just don’t know what to do.
link:
https://www.reddit.com/r/domesticviolence/comments/1373y1p/is_this_domestic_abuse_or_am_i_being_dramatic/
posted yesterday, seven months after post #1. She married him of course. She's three hours away from family by plane. Hopefully she has a family that gives a shit (unlikely because on many levels she's putting up with this guy's shit) and she can just go home and not to back.
Title: Am I the AH in my marriage?
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I (f22) and my husband (m25) have been married for only 6 months now. We’ve gone through many arguments in the short time we’ve been married - some really ugly and some just your average bickering matches. But this argument escalated pretty badly, and I need opinions on whether or not my behavior warranted what happened. This is a long story so thank you in advance if you take the time to read it!
Last night my husband called me after I had just gotten off work. I work in a warehouse so I get pretty worn out once I’m home, and I’ve been sick this last week so I wasn’t in the right frame of mind to have the conversation that he wanted to have with me. He was upset over my father having access to my banking account (it’s been that way since college and I’m only 22 - every now and then my dad would send me money when I needed it, and I just never got off the account). I told my husband that I didn’t want to talk about it right then since I wasn’t feeling well, but he insisted to have the conversation over FaceTime. It escalated, and finally he told me “you can cancel the plane tickets for our vacation, I’m not going.” When I heard that, I hung up on him. I know that makes me an AH, but he’s done this so many times when he’s frustrated. Cancelling plans is his way of getting back at me because he knows how much they mean to me. I shouldn’t have hung up on him, and I know that.
Fast forward to when he gets home from work. I go to talk to him and he says “unless you’re coming to apologize, we aren’t talking.” I tried explaining to him how I felt about the situation and he told me that I was disrespectful and he wasn’t going to talk to me unless I came to him with the right attitude and apology. I was talking to him and he was staring at his phone, paying me no mind (which is a big issue in our marriage). I started crying and begged him to just talk to me but he told me if I didn’t like how he was acting then to go find someone else. Then he shooed me out the door with his hand. I’m really bad at handling my emotions at times, so when he did this something inside of me just exploded and I knew I needed to get out. My coping mechanism has always been to just leave, so that’s what I did. I got in my car and drove off for an hour and a half. I know that wasn’t right, but I just couldn’t process my feelings well in the moment. He texted me saying “if you don’t come back inside then I’m done with this marriage.” This is another thing he does frequently - threatening to leave the marriage when he’s angry. I numbly walked back inside my house at 1:30am, as he was sitting on the couch playing video games.
I took a shower, went in our bedroom to read, then went to sleep around 3am. He came in at 4am and got in bed, then aggressively tried moving my knee (even though it was on my side of the bed and most definitely not in his way). I got angry and just stormed out of the room with my things, intending to sleep on the couch. Here’s where I was an AH - I slammed the door out of anger. Apparently I slammed it hard enough to knock the mirror off of it. He immediately screamed at me to come back and fix it, but I ignored him. He came out to the couch where I was laying and ripped my blanket off of me, then dragged me off of it by my feet and yelled at me again to go fix it. I shut down and just got back on the couch and turned my back to him because honestly my heart was racing out of fear. When I wouldn’t fix it, he went in the room and grabbed the mirror and threw it in my direction while calling me a piece of shit. It only hit me in the middle of my back, but just barely. Though it didn’t really hurt me, I was definitely shaken up.
After that I fell asleep on the couch. Today when I woke up he was getting ready to leave for work. Once he had all his things together, he told me to send him the information to cancel the flights. I just didn’t say anything because what am I supposed to say? That trip was supposed to be for us to visit my family, and I don’t want to cancel it. I also think the tickets we bought were non refundable anyways, but I knew he wouldn’t want to hear that. He got mad and came over and got in my face repeating himself but I just refused to look at him. When I didn’t respond, he left the house with the biggest slam of the door. I know I messed up and was disrespectful too, but is this all my fault? AITAH?
Update: Thank you to everyone who responded - I don’t really know what to say because I’m feeling so many different emotions at this point. Thank you to those who reached out to me with kind messages, I plan on getting back to you guys soon it’s just hard for me to respond right now. I don’t have much of a plan yet but I do know that I’m leaving tonight after work to go stay with my family for some time to figure things out. Unfortunately I have a job here and I’m not sure what to do about that when my family lives three hours away. I have a lot I need to figure out, and for those who are saying it’s fake and that I’m just looking for attention - believe what you want. Honestly at this point I wish it was all fake. I wish it was a dream but unfortunately it’s my life so please be kind. I know I opened up a door for harshness by even posting my situation, but at the end of the day I’m a person with real feelings just trying to make it through the day. It’s hard for me to respond to all of your thoughts since there are so many and I’m sorry for that, but trust that I’m seeing them and truly taking them to heart. Thank you all.
https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/comments/1829ycy/aitah_in_my_marriage/?sort=controversial
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 24, 2023 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 7,963 |
Wow. She's really minimizing his abuse and putting most of the blame on herself. I didn't get out of my abusive marriage because at first I did that. It wasn't until I saw what was really going on (it took me awhile because of the excuses I was making for his behavior) and got mad. Things escalated in our home but at least I finally escaped. I couldn't really leave until I had gotten my diploma and worked awhile in a secure job. I did relocate, but managed to get a similar job in my new town.
I realized after awhile that I didn't deserve to live this way and no matter what I did or how I thought, it would only get worse. Things may be a bit of a struggle financially, but at least I can live in peace. Everything isn't a fight anymore.
This woman needs to leave NOW. I really hope she doesn't get pregnant with this jerk. If she does, she'll be tied to his abusing ass forever and he'll probably also be abusive to the kid. There are too many benefits for abusers and too little consequences for them to stop their behavior.
I really don't know why she married him after the first post she made. She probably thought she could change him. I hope she doesn't think bringing a loaf into the situation will do that. It will only change him for the worst.
I realized after awhile that I didn't deserve to live this way and no matter what I did or how I thought, it would only get worse. Things may be a bit of a struggle financially, but at least I can live in peace. Everything isn't a fight anymore.
This woman needs to leave NOW. I really hope she doesn't get pregnant with this jerk. If she does, she'll be tied to his abusing ass forever and he'll probably also be abusive to the kid. There are too many benefits for abusers and too little consequences for them to stop their behavior.
I really don't know why she married him after the first post she made. She probably thought she could change him. I hope she doesn't think bringing a loaf into the situation will do that. It will only change him for the worst.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 26, 2023 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
He's already gaslit the fight out of her. When she doesn't want to talk about something at the moment (perfectly reasonable) he gets in her face and starts yelling but when she removes herself or slams a door she feels "bad" for her behavior. Yelling back and slamming doors aren't ideal, but the guy is physically violent and she's trying to get away from him. And naturally, because it's reddit, there are a lot of male commenters who are saying she's "immature" and "doesn't know how to communicate." When someone is being an asshole, you do not owe them "reasonable" communication back. Many abusers are really good at trying to get their victims to accept double standards. I've been there myself.
Here's another one who needs an abortion but for some reason she's not getting one. And she wants to hide the baybee from the Duddy. She says he's not a "horrible" person but admits in the comments that he's physically abused her when she was "wrong," which she says she "understands." And naturally the guy is "a lot older" than she is. ETA: She wrote in the comments that she's 18. I'm still looking for his age.
It seems like a lot of parents are failing their girl children. Granted, the economy sucks, but they are not even TRYING to get them to take care of themselves. They are not teaching them about birth control and they are marrying them off at age 20 or younger. It's probably to get them out of their own hair. It's sad.
https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/comments/1849o8i/aitah_for_not_telling_the_babys_father_im/
Here's another one who needs an abortion but for some reason she's not getting one. And she wants to hide the baybee from the Duddy. She says he's not a "horrible" person but admits in the comments that he's physically abused her when she was "wrong," which she says she "understands." And naturally the guy is "a lot older" than she is. ETA: She wrote in the comments that she's 18. I'm still looking for his age.
It seems like a lot of parents are failing their girl children. Granted, the economy sucks, but they are not even TRYING to get them to take care of themselves. They are not teaching them about birth control and they are marrying them off at age 20 or younger. It's probably to get them out of their own hair. It's sad.
https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/comments/1849o8i/aitah_for_not_telling_the_babys_father_im/
Quote
Hi y’all, I’m sorry for posting here. I genuinely need you guys’ opinion and will accept whatever verdict you give me.
I’m pregnant. I decided I was going to give the baby up for adoption quite soon after finding out, due to many reasons (among them my age and stuff).
My family knows. The father doesn’t though, and I don’t want to tell him. He wasn’t a kind person when we were dating. (I don’t wanna get into it too much.) We were sort of together and it went bad FAST. I ended up blocking him and cutting off contact, which was a struggle in itself.
I feel like if I tell him, he’ll use it in a way to keep me close. But maybe I’m being too selfish…? I don’t know. I figured if I told everyone that I didn’t know who the father is, I’d be able to do it without his permission. Maybe? But idk.
Sorry for this.
AITA for not telling him?
Edit: Thank you to everyone for replying. I’m really grateful, even if I’m the AH. Can I just ask not to send chats?
Also, I do know I need to stay away from him myself. But I don’t know if he’s like this with others, or maybe he’d be a good father. That’s why I feel conflicted. Just because I brought that out in him, doesn’t mean others will, I guess. He’s not a horrible person.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 26, 2023 | Registered: 15 years ago Posts: 3,919 |
bet the stupid little girl goes snuffling about his baabbbeeee. trouble is, and if it is a smaller town, the prick may find out anyway.
this is where I always wonder about safe haven. if the prick knows, doesn't want to give it up for adoption, just to take the child a couple of states away to a safe haven there. and don't even drive in with your own vehicle. find some place a mile away, take an uber there.. drop it off and then walk away.. of course one might be accused of murder.. so not sure about the legality of this.
two cents ¢¢
CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!
No one is more arrogant towards women, more aggressive or scornful, than the man who is anxious (insecure..my word) about his virility. Simone de Beauvoir
people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong
Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children. The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.
Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.
People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke
Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
this is where I always wonder about safe haven. if the prick knows, doesn't want to give it up for adoption, just to take the child a couple of states away to a safe haven there. and don't even drive in with your own vehicle. find some place a mile away, take an uber there.. drop it off and then walk away.. of course one might be accused of murder.. so not sure about the legality of this.
two cents ¢¢
CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!
No one is more arrogant towards women, more aggressive or scornful, than the man who is anxious (insecure..my word) about his virility. Simone de Beauvoir
people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong
Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children. The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.
Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.
People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke
Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 26, 2023 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
Of course, abortion would be the first option. She wrote in the comments that she "found out too late" to have an abortion. I guess if she lives in a Fundy hellhole with a six week abortion ban, that's possible.
I don't know about the legality of rehoming a baybee without the father's consent, but OMFG there are SO MANY stories on the IRHC Facebook page where a woman wanted to have an abortion and the guy flipped out, but even a couple of months later, the guy is nowhere to be found. So many of these asshole "men" do not want their partners to abort, but they have ZERO interest in raising the kid, and the single Mooothers end up on the Facebook page, complaining their lives are ruined.
This is why women who get pregnant by jerks should NEVER tell the guy. If the guy is a jerk to begin with, what do these women think will happen if the guy knows they are pregnant? Bigger jerk, incoming. It's not hard to figure this out, but so many of these women think the guy is going to get all misty-eyed and turn into a decent guy. No way in Hell.
I don't know about the legality of rehoming a baybee without the father's consent, but OMFG there are SO MANY stories on the IRHC Facebook page where a woman wanted to have an abortion and the guy flipped out, but even a couple of months later, the guy is nowhere to be found. So many of these asshole "men" do not want their partners to abort, but they have ZERO interest in raising the kid, and the single Mooothers end up on the Facebook page, complaining their lives are ruined.
This is why women who get pregnant by jerks should NEVER tell the guy. If the guy is a jerk to begin with, what do these women think will happen if the guy knows they are pregnant? Bigger jerk, incoming. It's not hard to figure this out, but so many of these women think the guy is going to get all misty-eyed and turn into a decent guy. No way in Hell.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 27, 2023 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,753 |
Quote
bell_flower
This is why women who get pregnant by jerks should NEVER tell the guy. If the guy is a jerk to begin with, what do these women think will happen if the guy knows they are pregnant? Bigger jerk, incoming. It's not hard to figure this out, but so many of these women think the guy is going to get all misty-eyed and turn into a decent guy. No way in Hell.
These women shouldn't tell their significant other OR their parents. I've seen both backfire over and over again. Both SOs and parents will threaten to disown or throw her on the streets if they think it will force her to not abort.
I'd say telling a friend is conditional. If the friend seems at all jealous or insecure, don't tell her because she may leak it to the SO or families. Especially if the friend has bratz or if she is a rabid wanna-breed who hasn't been able to breed and is frustrated.
And definitely do not tell any fundies. It will get back to the families and she will be vilified. All fundies are blabbermouths by default. They think they are virtue signaling by tattling. And they are all anti-choice.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 29, 2023 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
Look at this one: Dud in name only wants the mother to put his name on the birth certificate so he can get 14 weeks of paid parental leave while he continues to ignore his chyyyyld. The Moo lives two hours away and he didn't even show up for the birth.
Where do these women find these princes to breed with? And she's 35 years old! Old enough to know better for sure.
https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmTheAsshole/comments/186w9o6/aita_for_not_helping_my_ex_to_get_parental_leave/
p.s. I personally get a kick out of the titles on Reddit and how these people minimize or obscure the real issue. Is she an asshole because she's not helping him get parental leave? Or is she the asshole for creating an entire kid with someone who couldn't be bothered to commit to her beforehand?
Where do these women find these princes to breed with? And she's 35 years old! Old enough to know better for sure.
https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmTheAsshole/comments/186w9o6/aita_for_not_helping_my_ex_to_get_parental_leave/
Quote
I F35 and M34 recently had a baby, we live 2hrs away in different cities … on the day I went in labor I called him and told him I was having contractions and will be heading to the hospital that was around 7:30pm he said ok that he will be on his way, I arrived at the hospital and around 930pm my water breaks and I text telling him thinking he is on his way he texted me saying “wow okay” my son was born at 11ish pm … since I was in labor with the assumption he was driving I feared the worse because there was a nasty storm, turned out he ignored my calls and texts.
Next day he finally texts me back saying he is coming at that point I didn’t even want him to come tbh but whatever he showed up so here is where I might be the asshole, when I filled the paper work to name my son I listed myself as legally separated to avoid adding him to the birth certificate.
His plans were to come to the hospital and get the birth certificate to get parental leave at his job 14 paid weeks. He came stayed for a half a day and complained about everything while he was there, when he left I felt relieved.
Now he is texting me demanding I fix the birth certificate to add his name so he can get parental leave but I refuse to do so since I’m the one taking care of our son and we are two hours away. He isn’t taking care of our child at all and the fact that he didn’t care about making it to the hospital on the day he was born plus isn’t that he is using the time to bound with our child either so am I the asshole ?!
p.s. I personally get a kick out of the titles on Reddit and how these people minimize or obscure the real issue. Is she an asshole because she's not helping him get parental leave? Or is she the asshole for creating an entire kid with someone who couldn't be bothered to commit to her beforehand?
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices November 30, 2023 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
So what exactly is the relationship between the Moo and the Duh who live two hours apart? I assume if they were in a more long-term or committed relationship, they wouldn't live separately. I assume they're fuck buddies, in which case why did this woman breed with him?
Sounds like the extent of his concern for the loaf was the ability to score three and a half months of vacation time, during which I'm sure he wouldn't lift a finger to raise the brat he helped make.
Do these women all go out of their way to breed with the biggest pieces of shit they can find? Or are they such trash fires themselves that this is the best they can do? The sex can't be that good, and then they complain about what pieces of crap their men are anyway. If Moo needs to get filled, there is a plethora of dildos to be had online that won't be as disappointing as one of these pricks they all seem to adore.
Sounds like the extent of his concern for the loaf was the ability to score three and a half months of vacation time, during which I'm sure he wouldn't lift a finger to raise the brat he helped make.
Do these women all go out of their way to breed with the biggest pieces of shit they can find? Or are they such trash fires themselves that this is the best they can do? The sex can't be that good, and then they complain about what pieces of crap their men are anyway. If Moo needs to get filled, there is a plethora of dildos to be had online that won't be as disappointing as one of these pricks they all seem to adore.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 02, 2023 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
Apparently another excuse why people are raising brats is because said brats have something called “rejection sensitive dysphoria.” It’s not an official diagnosis naturally.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/friendship-20/201907/what-is-rejection-sensitive-dysphoria
I’ve seen it on Reddit already.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/friendship-20/201907/what-is-rejection-sensitive-dysphoria
I’ve seen it on Reddit already.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 02, 2023 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 7,963 |
I just skimmed the article. I'm not surprised that they're trying to come up with another unnecessary label to add to the neverending list of labels that must be keeping a lot of psychologists and therapists in business.
I think it's kind of damaging to put labels on every little negative thing that people experience. I'm pretty sure most people have experienced something similar to this from time to time and I don't think it needs its own label. It's probably more common in people who have suffered abuse or neglect or something like bullying at school.
I can relate to some of those feelings but I'm a survivor of violent crime and I tend to be isolative and a bit socially anxious as a result of PTSD. The last thing I need is another label floating around there to add to my list of issues.
Working and interacting with people has been extremely helpful.
I think it's kind of damaging to put labels on every little negative thing that people experience. I'm pretty sure most people have experienced something similar to this from time to time and I don't think it needs its own label. It's probably more common in people who have suffered abuse or neglect or something like bullying at school.
I can relate to some of those feelings but I'm a survivor of violent crime and I tend to be isolative and a bit socially anxious as a result of PTSD. The last thing I need is another label floating around there to add to my list of issues.
Working and interacting with people has been extremely helpful.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 03, 2023 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
I get it, mum. I think life in general can be pretty hard and traumatic at times. Just having to grow up can be difficult.
It's one thing to have hard life experiences, but it's another when these Moomies (and sometimes Duds) go running to the child psychologist for bullshit diagnoses when their five year old kid is having a temper tantrum. And to use that as an excuse to never tell the kid no.
If you are someone's parent and your child is sensitive to rejection, it's your job to build them up with realistic information: hey, Kid, you may not be good at this, but you are good at that." And tell them there are some things they must do, just to get through life. But that would require being a parent and putting some thought into the process, and many cannot be bothered. They just tell themselves it's too haaaaard.
It's one thing to have hard life experiences, but it's another when these Moomies (and sometimes Duds) go running to the child psychologist for bullshit diagnoses when their five year old kid is having a temper tantrum. And to use that as an excuse to never tell the kid no.
If you are someone's parent and your child is sensitive to rejection, it's your job to build them up with realistic information: hey, Kid, you may not be good at this, but you are good at that." And tell them there are some things they must do, just to get through life. But that would require being a parent and putting some thought into the process, and many cannot be bothered. They just tell themselves it's too haaaaard.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 03, 2023 | Registered: 15 years ago Posts: 3,919 |
throw the fucking labels out and parent your fucking little bastards.
I always have in mind a letter some guy (an adult at this time) wrote about his fucking batshit schizophrenic egg donor. This was a long long time ago, a couple decades or longer) so the time he was talking about was before a lot of this psychiatric shit started. But his dad could not and would not cope with her fucking schizy acting out and would belt her one when she started in. The guy wrote that she should as hell could control her fucking behaviour because of that.
two cents ¢¢
CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!
No one is more arrogant towards women, more aggressive or scornful, than the man who is anxious (insecure..my word) about his virility. Simone de Beauvoir
people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong
Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children. The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.
Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.
People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke
Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
I always have in mind a letter some guy (an adult at this time) wrote about his fucking batshit schizophrenic egg donor. This was a long long time ago, a couple decades or longer) so the time he was talking about was before a lot of this psychiatric shit started. But his dad could not and would not cope with her fucking schizy acting out and would belt her one when she started in. The guy wrote that she should as hell could control her fucking behaviour because of that.
two cents ¢¢
CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!
No one is more arrogant towards women, more aggressive or scornful, than the man who is anxious (insecure..my word) about his virility. Simone de Beauvoir
people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong
Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children. The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.
Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.
People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke
Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 05, 2023 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
This situation was completely predictable.
From AITA:
Stop having kids you cannot afford, you fucking morons.
https://www.reddit.com/r/amiwrong/comments/18bnafr/am_i_wrong_for_being_angry_with_my_bf_for_giving/
From AITA:
Quote
Am I wrong for getting mad at my bf for giving his baby mama/ex wife money? To make this short she gets child support from him. He pays it and it's over 100 bucks a week for the two kids. Yet she still comes to him asking for money for food and diapers and sports for their oldest. Yet she doesn't work. She gets social security for her one kid. And she gets wic and ebt. Meanwhile my bf has to keep overdrawn his account to pay rent when I had to be out of work to have our baby.
For what I do know she has asked him for money twice this week already for diapers and baby food or formula. Then i know he will put gas in her car too for meeting for pickup. Then I get an attitude when I ask for money for our baby's formula or diapers. He usually pays for my gas everyday without me asking or fast food or will ask me if I need money for something. But like I asked for 30 dollars for a stroller today and he snapped about me about not having money for it. Yet she asked him today for money for diapers. I give him money weekly to help out with bills and buy our household groceries. I get really irritated with him saying how broke he is but he won't refuse to give his ex more money when she has multiple ways to get what she needs...or maybe she could just get a job?? Am I wrong for telling him he needs to stop giving her money all the time? I think part of him does it cause he can't be present for those kids as much due to his job as he can for our baby.
I should add that I get zero child support for my kids from my ex and the system does nothing cause he is on disability. So I HAVE to work to make sure they are taken care of.
Stop having kids you cannot afford, you fucking morons.
https://www.reddit.com/r/amiwrong/comments/18bnafr/am_i_wrong_for_being_angry_with_my_bf_for_giving/
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Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 05, 2023 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 7,963 |
Looks like she got butthurt and deleted her post as well as replies (maybe the whole account is gone?)
I suppose she didn't like everyone handing her ass to her about having kids with this broke-ass duh so soon after his first babymomma gave birth. 1st one's kids is still in diapers and on formula and she's already knocked up with one.
Sounds like a Kid Rock song. These people need to grow the hell up and he needs to get snipped.
I suppose she didn't like everyone handing her ass to her about having kids with this broke-ass duh so soon after his first babymomma gave birth. 1st one's kids is still in diapers and on formula and she's already knocked up with one.
Sounds like a Kid Rock song. These people need to grow the hell up and he needs to get snipped.
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