What I always suspected, it never gets better

From Reddit:

One thing I realized, going from stage to stage, is that people keep telling me: it gets better. It's like Sisyphus pushing the rock and having it fall down. Dealing with a colicky baby? "It gets better". Personality changes? "It gets better." Then they're walking and talking and screaming, you hear "it gets better". Dealing with having to drive them all over, temper tantrums, bedtimes, "it gets better". Teenage years? "it gets better".

Maybe time to realize that it will never get better. Time to realize that it's all cope. It will always be bad, just in different ways, but guess what, it still is bad. I hate being a parent. Everything I enjoyed in my pre-parent life I barely get to enjoy now. My relationship with my partner is strained because neither of us can connect in the same way now.

Not my quote but relevant:"the world will ask you who you are, and if you don't know it will answer for you." Before becoming a parent I never really had a desire for kids but my partner did. Worst mistake of my life.

So far I've realized that having a kid is like your friend telling you to keep watching some shitty tv series because it gets better in the 3rd season or something.


https://www.reddit.com/r/regretfulparents/comments/1t2yn4q/guess_what_it_never_gets_better/

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The replies all agree with her and they all just say they are waiting for the kids to grow up and out of the house and hopefully have no time to visit them so they can go back to living their lives again. Wow. I'm so glad people no longer are afraid to talk this way, at least behind a keyboard on social media. They dread the fact that adult kids no longer move out anymore.

Also about her quote about life telling you who you are. This is something I've realized in older age about humans. This is yet another reason I dont get people having kids, just because, or just because they might regret it if they dont, most people are lazy, especially at different stages in life. My friends have commented they never could go back to school FT or night school a full week of classes, or work out on a regular basis, or do trully hard work outs, and many other hard achievements, like they graduate HS or college and that's it for them, especially as an adult w/ home life and work life responsibilities. Yet, they marry and get talked into the lifescript, and either think its easy, bcz it is, its not technically hard work, but it is thankless busy work especially how now kyds are not allowed out of your sight to play, or, they know its hard and dont want to admit it to themselves or the world that they arent this soulful caring mommie or daddye type I mean if you cant routinely keep a workout up 3-4x a week, what makes you think you'll want to have all that busywork after your job during the day? So they do it, and life teaches them who they are and are not. This has to be why they want everyone to join the cult, and the misery loves company shit about it.

This is why my reproductive system's in the medical waste pile.

+++++++++++++

Passive Aggressive
Master Of Anti-brat
Excuses!

Sure, one problem might get better, but the thing is it will always be replaced with a new problem.

This moron's mistake was having kids they didn't want for their partner. I don't care how much you love them, you NEVER EVER have kids you don't want for someone else. I have never once heard a positive outcome from such an arrangement.

"It gets better" is just what they tell themselves to survive another day. Like saying "I just have to make it to Friday" every single week to keep your sanity intact.

They can't even really look forward to the kids flying the nest anymore either. Twenty or thirty years ago? Sure. But now more than ever, adults are still having to live with their parents because they can't afford to live independently. So there is no more counting down the days to the kids' 18th birthdays because that's no longer the magic number. I mean yes, they CAN kick their kids out at 18, but it could result in those kids winding up homeless. Having kids now is definitely closer to a life sentence than just an 18-year one.

On another subreddit, either breaking moo or regretful parunts, there was a post and a long list of replies how they all hate the weekends, becuz they are with their kids. How TF does someone live that way? Even if you hate your spouse or roommate, you can leave, have your own fun, run errands, curl up w/ a book and ignore the world behind a closed door or in the yard. But since kids need to be supervised and/or carted around to *their* social lives of activities and whatnot, and cooked and cleaned for, there's no escape whatsoever. Vacations with them are 10x worse. Ive been on these CF websites for decades, and I still cant conceive it. In fact I'm more flabbergasted by it than ever. In the past people did not speak this openly about it, but Im sure glad they are now. At least now I know there definitely wasnt anything to regret, even tho I always knew.

I've heard family vacations described (usually by mothers) as "paying to parent in a different location." Because it's not like the parents get to take a real vacation - they still have to wrangle their kids, and if their brats are awtarded, vacation might mean more triggers that set them off. The Duhs might have something closer to a vacation because they generally aren't the ones minding the kids. They show up for the brief fun moments, but it's Moo who is taming tantrums.

Having to actually be near their own kids is also why parents HATE summer break. They can't send the brats off to the babysitter school, and since most people probably can't afford summer camp anymore, it means they're home and in Mommy's hair 24/7 for three months.

Like isn't your existing family enough people to not want to be around without making whole new people you also don't want to be around? There is not a single thing I have heard about parenthood that sounds appealing.

Yes, on another subreddit a Moo starts a thread, Are you dreading the summer? LOL


Sucks to be moo.


So glad for my choices in life.