The B-day Party

I really feel for you and can relate. Sprogs used to make a bead for me. Now, not so much, because I give them the "death glare." It was amazing how the look on my face kept the little beasts away.
Trust your feelings. Use the force.

You could always try to teach them something. Biggest turn off for 95% of the kids.

Or be drunk.
Drunks love kids...Kids love drunks.

Being drunk is good. I got drunk all the time when I was dragged to my ex's relatives sproggy parties.

Excellent ideas...Get drunk,and teach them how to play the quiet game!Thanks, I'll try that next time!

well i wear black most of the time, and being somewhat 6 foot tall, long black hair, and vampire fangs and usually wear a silver pentagram ring for some reason parents dont want kids anywhere near me