Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners
Posted by blondie
Anonymous User
Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 03, 2011 |
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 03, 2011 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 1,196 |
Anonymous User
Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 03, 2011 |
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In The Same Boat
I understand all that you state in your post. I am 48, single, never married, and while I have a good income/career, financially secure, etc. it isn't all that fulfulling. Netflix and my pets are my life savers.
It sounds like you really, really want to become a parent. Have you thought about becoming a foster parent and also getting certified for adoption of foster children in your state? A good friend of mine, female, a 52 year old government attorney, simply reached the conclusion "Mr. Right" wants "Miss 20 year Old" and she adopted a sibling pair of girls who had their parental rights terminated by the State. My friend is so glowingly happy; the girls are thriving. It is work, my frind says, and the children "did come with baggage" but she says becoming a foster parent and adopting was the best thing she ever did.
Your posted helped me too. I feel the same vexations that you also express in your post. I hope this helps, perhaps a bit.
Signing off as In The Same Boat
Clearly you haven't read the rest of the thread.
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 03, 2011 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 7,832 |
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In The Same Boat
I understand all that you state in your post. I am 48, single, never married, and while I have a good income/career, financially secure, etc. it isn't all that fulfulling. Netflix and my pets are my life savers.
It sounds like you really, really want to become a parent. Have you thought about becoming a foster parent and also getting certified for adoption of foster children in your state? A good friend of mine, female, a 52 year old government attorney, simply reached the conclusion "Mr. Right" wants "Miss 20 year Old" and she adopted a sibling pair of girls who had their parental rights terminated by the State. My friend is so glowingly happy; the girls are thriving. It is work, my frind says, and the children "did come with baggage" but she says becoming a foster parent and adopting was the best thing she ever did.
Your posted helped me too. I feel the same vexations that you also express in your post. I hope this helps, perhaps a bit.
Signing off as In The Same Boat
Did you fucking read this thread? As Frenzy politely pointed out, none of us here wish to have kyds, and we are only using this poor pathetic loser as an example of...well, what a loser she is and why her life is shit.
The only vexation here is that you think you share anything with me...and btw: you are not in the same boat as any of us.
I'm sure there's a turkey baster and a petri-dish somewhere out there with your name on them.
Good day..
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 9,973 |
I don't think I ever read this topic originally, so a little part of me is kinda glad it got bumped. As for the nutjob discussed originally, she's beyond hope. If she feels life is not worth living without children in it (translation: biological kids, not those sub-human adopted kids eyes2), then she will never be happy. Sure, some guys might be turned on by the fact she's not childed, but they will fucking run for the hills when she starts talking about babies on the first date.
She wants to give a child a job before it's even conceived - once born, she expects this miniature and helpless human creature to make her life fulfilling and complete. What happens when she isn't glowing with motherly pride, or the kid is born retarded and extra needy because she had to have a kid at age 50? WHY is it that anytime a woman says she feels her life is empty, the only thing she feels will pull her out of her slump is a baby? Why would you want your sanity to be dependent on a completely dependent infant?
If you can't look beyond spawning as a way to enhance your life, you are already a waste of oxygen. It's like when a spoiled little kid will sigh and go, "I'm bored" when they're surrounded by things they could use that they are just too unimaginative to use. I've got zero sympathy for this woman - she's pathetic.
eyes2), then she will never be happy. Sure, some guys might be turned on by the fact she's not childed, but they will fucking run for the hills when she starts talking about babies on the first date.She wants to give a child a job before it's even conceived - once born, she expects this miniature and helpless human creature to make her life fulfilling and complete. What happens when she isn't glowing with motherly pride, or the kid is born retarded and extra needy because she had to have a kid at age 50? WHY is it that anytime a woman says she feels her life is empty, the only thing she feels will pull her out of her slump is a baby? Why would you want your sanity to be dependent on a completely dependent infant?
If you can't look beyond spawning as a way to enhance your life, you are already a waste of oxygen. It's like when a spoiled little kid will sigh and go, "I'm bored" when they're surrounded by things they could use that they are just too unimaginative to use. I've got zero sympathy for this woman - she's pathetic.
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 | Registered: 15 years ago Posts: 5,275 |
The woman's original post was a shining example of the maxim that we are all responsible for our own happiness.
Why doesn't she change her view and see her life situation as one of uncommon freedom? Want to take a beadwork class as another poster mentioned? No problem. Like to audit some classes at the local university? Can do. Get certified in welding in night classes at the community college, when most women with kids are tied down? Sure!
And then the beadwork teacher mentions to her uncle that there's this charming lady in her class. Another student in the university class notices the smart woman who always asks good questions and introduces her to his father over coffee. The welding instructor is impressed by her work in making a seam and raves about her to her single male friend.
She can do anything. Just as I did when I went to a local monthly sustainability group nearly six years ago as a single late-30s-something single woman. And completely unexpectedly met the gentlemen who is my dear husband today. I wouldn't have had the good sense to pick him from a crowd just given my own judgment.....but over time being in the group together fostered a marriage.
If she is doing stuff that makes her happy, fulfilled, humorous, self-actualized, that is SO much more attractive than this whinging and moaning.
Why doesn't she change her view and see her life situation as one of uncommon freedom? Want to take a beadwork class as another poster mentioned? No problem. Like to audit some classes at the local university? Can do. Get certified in welding in night classes at the community college, when most women with kids are tied down? Sure!
And then the beadwork teacher mentions to her uncle that there's this charming lady in her class. Another student in the university class notices the smart woman who always asks good questions and introduces her to his father over coffee. The welding instructor is impressed by her work in making a seam and raves about her to her single male friend.
She can do anything. Just as I did when I went to a local monthly sustainability group nearly six years ago as a single late-30s-something single woman. And completely unexpectedly met the gentlemen who is my dear husband today. I wouldn't have had the good sense to pick him from a crowd just given my own judgment.....but over time being in the group together fostered a marriage.
If she is doing stuff that makes her happy, fulfilled, humorous, self-actualized, that is SO much more attractive than this whinging and moaning.
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,198 |
I read what ITSB wrote and about her friend; it's admirable and I'm glad people like her friend are on this earth. She adopted two kids who were already here. (I just hope she did it before she did IVF 15 times.) And notice that she's picking up the slack for Breeders--somebody thought it was a good idea to to crap out not just one kid, but two, then they behaved badly enough to get their rights terminated by the state, which means the mom was probably a drug-addicted whore.
But let it be known I have no desire to do this. That woman is probably going to have to work until she's at least 60--Gawd willing, I want to be on the way to early retirement.
But let it be known I have no desire to do this. That woman is probably going to have to work until she's at least 60--Gawd willing, I want to be on the way to early retirement.
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 8,402 |
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blondie
The discussion on this site is supposed to be for middle aged NMNKs. It is incredibly depressing, with many of the posters being childLESS and crazy negative or just crazy. Also, some mawms couldn't help but post, despite being reminded that the discussion is only for those never married without kids.
http://lifetwo.com/production/node/20070927-midlife-and-always-single-women
Here is a nice one:
Submitted by Anonymous on August 29, 2010 - 8:14am.
"I found this when I googled "what do single women with no kids do after 40?" I can't come to any conclusions. I just failed at my 3rd IVF attempt, after 5 artificial insemination attempts. Back then I didn't think it was a fertility problem, just a lack of man problem. Now, 5 years later, still no man, still no kids, looking at 47 in 3 weeks, what is the purpose of life? I can't find one. Life is drudgery. Day after day, week after week, doing my time until what? My only dream in life was to get married and have children. But never in all my life did a man look into my eyes and say 'I want to be with you the rest of my life', why? I've been on the work-work out-sleep wheel for 25 years now. I'm in shape, I keep up with fashion, I'm social. But I guess now that there are indents in my face where it use to be plump, the magic is over. I don't want men 50, divorsed with grandchildren - what do I have in common with them? But men who haven't been married with no kids who want that, don't want me. So now the age old question - what is age? Why do I have to own up to that number that puts me immediately into a category that is unwanted by the family oriented male? Even more important, where in the world to meet one. I work from home now, so I no longer have that co-worker atmosphere.
WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOUR SINGLE, NO CHILDREN AND OVER 40? What is worth living for anymore when your dream is dead?"
:kill I don't even know where to begin.
I go to rock concerts and flirt with the musicians, that's what!
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,975 |
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In The Same Boat
I understand all that you state in your post. I am 48, single, never married, and while I have a good income/career, financially secure, etc. it isn't all that fulfulling. Netflix and my pets are my life savers.
It sounds like you really, really want to become a parent. Have you thought about becoming a foster parent and also getting certified for adoption of foster children in your state? A good friend of mine, female, a 52 year old government attorney, simply reached the conclusion "Mr. Right" wants "Miss 20 year Old" and she adopted a sibling pair of girls who had their parental rights terminated by the State.
OK so she used these kyds as a replacement for a man. She couldn't find a decent man, and they are out there, so whatever, just pick out a couple of helpless humans who can't reject her - at least not yet.
These type of women do use chyldren as replacements for mates. They are heavily flawed people who use the "men suck" excuse because they can't pick a good guy. It's easy to use this excuse when you are over forty because there are a certain segment of men who do chase much younger women, but most normal guys want a real relationship with an equal. These women use age as an excuse when it is not their age that keeps them alone, it is them.
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 12,034 |
She's as pathetic as the 50-year-old brokedicks who slink around in clubs looking for a 20-year-old Megan Fox.
"What's that baby? Yes, I AM a salesman for Kia...I can see you in a Sorrento. Hey, where ya going? BITCH!"
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"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny
"What's that baby? Yes, I AM a salesman for Kia...I can see you in a Sorrento. Hey, where ya going? BITCH!"
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"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 803 |
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Cambion
She wants to give a child a job before it's even conceived - once born, she expects this miniature and helpless human creature to make her life fulfilling and complete. What happens when she isn't glowing with motherly pride, or the kid is born retarded and extra needy because she had to have a kid at age 50? WHY is it that anytime a woman says she feels her life is empty, the only thing she feels will pull her out of her slump is a baby? Why would you want your sanity to be dependent on a completely dependent infant?
And they call us selfish. There is nothing more selfish than purposely having a kid at age 50, only to be a senior citizen by the time they graduate high school. I don't think it could get anymore short sighted than that.
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 661 |
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 3,978 |
And if this freak gets her wanted baby, what is she going to do when the malleable baby becomes a toddler able to walk, talk, and form its own basic opinions? What is she going to do when it goes to school and makes friends that it'll want to spend time with? What is she going to do when the baby becomes a teen and starts becoming resentful at how it was born with a job and expected to hang around Mommy forever and not grow into their own person? What is she going to do when her baby is now an adult and finds any reason to not visit because it's tired of being made to feel guilty for not fulfilling the duty it was born to do?
CFBitchfromLA
Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 |
After all, a woman's life is defined only by her uterine products, right? So that means every period is sacred, like sperm is sacred (ala Monty Python)? PUHLEEZE....
I am well over 40, have a loving, handsome and childfree husband and we own a paid-off house which houses a kitty named Molly and a beagle named Barclay. Tony and I travel frequently on vacations just for the two of us, we both volunteer our time and service to various charities (Tony to a homeless shelter for senior citizens, me to a local no-kill pet shelter) and both of us are at the peak of our careers. Real empty life--fuck no--can't even say half-empty.
I am well over 40, have a loving, handsome and childfree husband and we own a paid-off house which houses a kitty named Molly and a beagle named Barclay. Tony and I travel frequently on vacations just for the two of us, we both volunteer our time and service to various charities (Tony to a homeless shelter for senior citizens, me to a local no-kill pet shelter) and both of us are at the peak of our careers. Real empty life--fuck no--can't even say half-empty.
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 1,895 |
Anonymous User
Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 |
This woman is boring as fuck, that's why nobody asked to spend the rest of their lives with her. Because who would?
It's okay women with shit personalities that spout crap like 'there's a man shortage' because they can't find someone to put up with their god-awful personalities (or lack thereof)
She has massive tickets on herself too, she just writes off dating 50yr old men with kids (who she could play with) because she's still go this ridiculous idea that a young man will want to start a family with her!
Shining example of someone who hasn't learnt to love themselves and as such, can't find anyone to love them.
It's okay women with shit personalities that spout crap like 'there's a man shortage' because they can't find someone to put up with their god-awful personalities (or lack thereof)
She has massive tickets on herself too, she just writes off dating 50yr old men with kids (who she could play with) because she's still go this ridiculous idea that a young man will want to start a family with her!
Shining example of someone who hasn't learnt to love themselves and as such, can't find anyone to love them.
Anonymous User
Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 04, 2011 |
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 05, 2011 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 12,034 |
If my life ever did feel empty, I would take it as a sign that I'm stagnating, and it would be time to go volunteer or take some more classes. Crapping a loaf is hardly a solution to ennui.
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"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny
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"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 05, 2011 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 4,998 |
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 05, 2011 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 556 |
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raindancemaggie
Maybe all the money she spent on artificial insemination and IVF coulda gone to ADOPTING a child, if she wants one that badly. DUH.
Exactly what I was thinking. Isn't all that stuff expensive? Five years she's been at this? She probably could have adopted two kids by now.
What a mess. She's already 47 and doesn't seem to have even given any consideration to looking at life a different way. Like: "I'd really like to get married and have kids, but time isn't in my side here, so I'd be happy with one or the other." or "I don't think I'm going to get the version of my life that I originally wanted. So what can I do?"
Didn't it, at 35, or 40 or 45, occur to her that she really needs to develop some new ambitions? Having a baby is, at best, a meaningful experience, it's not The Only Meaningful Experience.
Snap out of it, woman. Just as sure as you're about to be 47, one day you'll be a few weeks from 60. Do you want to be hating yourself because you spent the 13 intervening years all aggrieved over your lack of a baby when you could have been doing stuff?
Maybe a lot of people don't like the idea that you have to choose and assemble a meaningful life, day by day, on your own.They think that it's supposed to come in a ready-made kit called Having a Family. Having a Family will make everything worthwhile. Having A Family will be so rewarding that you'll forget all about the things you had to give up for it. Having A Family absolves you from having to figure out what you really want to do with yourself. Then they find out that it's not true and that's when things get ugly.
Anonymous User
Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 05, 2011 |
Sound advice spinstar, but this woman sounds a bit dense.
Can you imagine how whiny her kids would be? 'I'm borrrreeed, there's nothing to doooo mum'
I don't understand how she can think of nothing meaningful/pleasurable to do during her days. She has to have been doing something these past 47 odd years.
Go have a glass of wine in the bath and read a fucking book lady. It's impossible not to appreciate CFdom when peacfully dozing off in a bath.
Can you imagine how whiny her kids would be? 'I'm borrrreeed, there's nothing to doooo mum'
I don't understand how she can think of nothing meaningful/pleasurable to do during her days. She has to have been doing something these past 47 odd years.
Go have a glass of wine in the bath and read a fucking book lady. It's impossible not to appreciate CFdom when peacfully dozing off in a bath.
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 05, 2011 | Registered: 17 years ago Posts: 4,117 |
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nightshade
Sound advice spinstar, but this woman sounds a bit dense.
Can you imagine how whiny her kids would be? 'I'm borrrreeed, there's nothing to doooo mum'
I don't understand how she can think of nothing meaningful/pleasurable to do during her days. She has to have been doing something these past 47 odd years.
Go have a glass of wine in the bath and read a fucking book lady. It's impossible not to appreciate CFdom when peacfully dozing off in a bath.
Oh God, that is the best part! Anyways, wouldn't she want to celebrate being 47, comfortable in her career and finances, to take a really nice vacation (tropical?!?!?) instead of whining about not being a moo/married? FFS!
lab mom
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 05, 2011 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,975 |
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nomooingzone
I don't think a kid she would have had would have fulfilled her either. It wouldn't have turned out to be the brilliant prodigy or sparkly princess she envisioned. Then she'd be on the internet whining about how her stupid kid ruined her life.
ITA. She and others like her are delusional and incredibly picky. They think the world owes them their own special fantasy and it has to be to their specifications.
This woman I knew once said she HAD to have the scripter picket fence life. She was a lawyer in her late thirties and didn't even really date. I asked, what if it didn't happen. She said it HAS to. So she started frantically looking on dating sites. She placed ads and got few responses so she answered men's ads. She only responded to a certain type - attractive doctors, wealthy businessmen, etc. They all rejected her and she became bitter over that. She refused to "settle" for anything less than what she felt she deserved. Unless she changed her tune, I'm sure she is still single and whining.
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 05, 2011 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 1,196 |
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Re: Childless middle aged women the biggest whiners December 05, 2011 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 7,149 |
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raindancemaggie
Maybe all the money she spent on artificial insemination and IVF coulda gone to ADOPTING a child, if she wants one that badly. DUH.
One has to wonder if she flunked adoption screening. I would reject someone like this in a hot minute.
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From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
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I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."
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