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The bad dates thread:drinky

Posted by cosmictraveler 
The bad dates thread:drinky
May 03, 2014
Someone suggested on the "nice guys" thread that we start a bad dates thread, so here it is! grinning smiley Tell the stories of the dates that pissed you off then, but just make you laugh now! winking smiley

I went out once with a guy who insisted we go to Wendy's because he only liked chicken nuggets. After "dinner" in his car, he asked if I would give him a bj. This was after he showed up to my house 2 hours earlier than he said he would and awkwardly had to wait for me to get ready because I'd just gotten off work, and at that time I was in food service so I was all sweaty and needed a shower and such. It was so awkward because I was staying at my mom's at the time, and she was home, and he sat in the living room waiting for me. I was relieved she didn't try to talk to him too much. I was of age and wouldn't introduce anyone to the 'rents unless things were getting serious. He had no sense of shame about showing up unannounced 2 hours early, in his movie theater worker uniform, because it was more convenient for him than going home to clean up and change. After his bj request, I made him drop me off at my best friend's house because I was just like WTF. That's the worst date I ever went on. tongue sticking out smiley
Anonymous User
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 03, 2014
This wasn't an actual date, but this happened online, on the phone, and in person. Happened two months ago.

To make the long story short, I met this guy on an online site. Saw his profile, thought he was pretty attractive. After thinking over it a while, I decided to give this guy a try and messaged him.

When he messaged me back, he wrote in text-speak. Inside, I'm thinking "Oh Great!", but I gave the dude another chance since he's lazy.

Two days later, we talk on the phone. He was talking in that ghetto lingo that I cannot stand. Ghetto is the black and hispanic equivalent of white trash. I knew that this wasn't the right guy for me at all.

When we actually met in person a week later (on my Spring Break), he tells me that he works at a law firm. When I was telling him that I'm an introvert, he was asked me, "What an introvert?" I shit you not, he really did actually asked me that.

And he was trying to kiss me (which I was not in the mood).

At that point, I got fed up and left. He gave me some change since he wanted me to go to 7-eleven to pick up some soda. I said hell no, I'm not doing that and left.

Yeah, I'm pretty much done with online dating.
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 03, 2014
Here's one of my bad date stories:

Many years ago, when I was only months out of boot camp, I went on possibly the shittiest date ever. I met this guy on my base, in the mess hall. He seemed nice (and was cute to boot). We started talking, and eventually we decided to go see a movie.

Here's the thing; when I met this doofus, I was at this base for a while, so I knew my way around the area. He just came to the area, BUT he had a car, and I didn't.

Anyway, when we were leaving the base, I told him to go straight ahead to the mall. Did he do that? Oh hell no...he took a left, and we were on our way to an Army base. After many turns and twists, we managed to find our way to the mall.

By the time we got there, the movie was well underway. So, we decided to get some pizza in the food court. :dindin He then had the nerve to tell me to not go overboard. First of all, if I know someone else is paying, I don't take advantage anyway. Halfway through the meal, I could almost feel the steam coming out of my ears. :scr

Then, after our pizza, we felt like heading back to the base. Was that a smooth ride, you ask? And the answer is....fuck no. Instead of listening to ME, someone who knows the area, he stopped by THREE gas stations for directions. :headbrick

At the third gas station, he decided to fill up. While he was pumping gas, I was at the point where I pretended to be mute. He only made things worse by talking about how he wrote for the New York Times, and he was such a great person. smile rolling left righteyes2

He finally noticed that I was extremely pissed off...and he made things even worse. He then started asking me what was wrong, and I wouldn't answer him. He then said, "You know, you can tell me anything...I'm your free therapist!" hitting over the head with a hammer

After that hellish journey, I was back in my barracks just before curfew (in a training situation, curfews are imposed). Here's the cherry on top of the sundae; he then shook my hand and said he had a wonderful time. I'd hate to think of what he'd consider a shitty time. sarcastic clapping

I ran into him some time later; he asked me if I wanted to go out again, but I told him to kick rocks.angry flipping off

_________________________________________________________

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"She, and all other rabid breeders, are like crabs in a bucket headed to Red Lobster. When they see a smarter crab escaping, they try to pull it back in." - Miss Hannigan

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Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 03, 2014
Wouldn't say that it was a bad date, but everything that could go wrong did.

We got to the theater and found that the movie I suggested had ended it's run. Being that this was Podunksville, and there were no other theaters and not much in the way of entertainment, I picked another movie which was bad-bad-WHOA-bad. Both of us sat in an uncomfortable silence for almost two hours as the POS movie ran.

Afterward, we went for pizza and tried to make conversation as we waited for the order. Being two very introverted people, this was not easy. I mostly lead with a 20 Questions kind of chat. 30 minutes pass and no order, no refill on the drinks. Date sat there, clearly realizing the date didn't go as he envisioned, so I waved a waitress over. Flustered, she said that "our" waitress had taken the order, forgot to give it to the kitchen, and left. So, another order, and another 20 minutes of silence and occasional shy glances at one another. I walked up to the counter and was told that the order had been put in, but no one had started making our food. The manager bustled over and said that our meal would be comped. Fine. But it still took another 30 minutes to fix the pizza. By the time we got it, it was 15 minutes until closing. The staff clearly wanted to go home and signaled that to us by slowly dimming the lights. So, we silently bolted our food and left.

Got back to my apartment and I realized that I was in the early stages of lactose intolerance. Sitting on the couch, both my mouth and stomach were doing the talking. I think Date realized that and tried to make a gentlemanly exit. He leaned over to kiss me good night just as I was doing a half stomach crunch to keep the bilious fumes from leaking out one end or the other. His lips hit my face at the corner of my mouth and slid across my cheek. We both started laughing - me trying to stifle the guffaw because it was causing an imminent fart - and he left. I raced to the bathroom and spray painted the toilet.

What was worse than a bad movie, free food because of shitty service, a clumsy kiss and me nearly tooting on my first date? We worked together. The next day, we made an embarrassed junction at the break room.

I don't remember how we worked it out, somehow we agreed to go on a second date and it got better from there. I think we decided that if a do-over didn't work, one of us would have to find another job. It was just too humiliating. Eight months later, we married and have been together ever since. That was 1986. Figures that, out of all my dating experiences, I'd end up with the guy who had the worst start out of the gate, but it's been a great three decades.
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 03, 2014
@cosmictraveler,

LMAO, Where did you meet that dude?

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"I have found little that is 'good' about human beings on the whole. In my experience most of them are trash, no matter whether they publicly subscribe to this or that ethical doctrine or to none at all."
~Sigmund Freud
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 03, 2014
Quote
peace-n-quiet
@cosmictraveler,

LMAO, Where did you meet that dude?

We had mutual friends and were hanging out when he asked if I wanted to do something sometime. That's what he wanted to go, apparently. Eat chicken nuggets at Wendy's a get a bj right after his shift at work. He was wearing your typical movie-theater work uniform and as I recall I think he didn't even bother to take off his nametag. waving hellolarious I think my mom picked up on how irritated I was with the whole affair and decided not to try and talk to him while he was chillin' on our couch, smelling of popcorn. hysterical laughterz At at the time, I really was livid, but now I think it's fucking hilarious.

My captcha" x9DUD ....how apropo. tongue sticking out smiley

Dorisan, your "bad date" was with a good guy, just everything that could go wrong did, like you said. smiling smiley Glad it ended up turning out for the best. And you guys can get a good laugh out of it now. grinning smiley smile rolling left rightsmile
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 03, 2014
This isn't the only place where I've read bad date stories. I haven't been in the dating scene for a long-lonnng time; I'm quite sure I never will be again, no matter what. But, from what I've read, conventions no longer exist. I think it was easier on guys from 25-30 years past - they had certain conventions to follow that made dating easier, especially in the first years of meeting girls/women. Now? *pffft* It's all out the window. These dolts have no guidance on expectations: appearance, conversation, choosing a date place..... There is no concept of making an impression or realizing that there are stages of getting to know one another.

My view is probably old-fashioned. My dating experiences were probably considered by people older than me to be as gauche as I view current day trends. But at least manners still existed when I was dating.
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 05, 2014
Chapter 1

Cheapo Jerry Maguire, 2000 and 2001:

I alluded to this in the nice guy thread. We met on Love@AOL, before Snatch.com bought it and made you pay. He was 4 years older than me, an attorney/sports agent who handled NFL players, well educated and seemed interesting and well traveled. Was also easy on the eyes. I am not into long and awkward dates so we agreed to a drink date. I guess he was disappointed at first sight because after one beer he was ready to split. We shook hands, and he admitted he did not feel a match. I thought of apologizing for not being Christy Turlington, but that was evident from my profile pics (plural, including the dreaded full body shot.)

Shrugged it off as a one and done and left it at that. I also did not really feel that much (considering his disappointment was too obvious.)

A year and a half later....I get an email for my ad and it sounds familiar. I look at the profile and it was him! Well, I figured that perhaps he wanted a second date after all and accepted. We agree to an after work drink. As he walks up he starts laughing a little...said "haven't we gone out before?" It was clear that he had no idea who he had agreed to a date with so I played it off with "Oh yeah, ha ha. How have you been?"

(Now I usually have credit cards on me, but a coworker went through my desk and stole my numbers so I was literally cardless that day. This plays into what happens next.)

Friendly banter and the waitress comes over. I order a martini, figuring I could nurse it and bail. He orders....water. Not a beer, not even a Coke. Water. Then he asked for the bill which he tried to pawn off on me. I told him about my week, mentioned that I was not going to be doing dishes to pay for one martini and finally, he begrudgingly paid for my Happy Hour priced drink. We parted ways a little less friendlier.

We ran in the same circles, so to speak, so I knew about the Ethan Allen showroom house and saw the top of the line Lexus. My thoughts about "Cheap Bastard" were realized when a friend went out with him. She, also an attorney, was less attractive in the face, but really really thin so she got a dinner date. While looking at the menu he pulls out this Entertainment coupon book, and informs her that she can only order certain entrees because they were part of the 2 for 1 special.

I wish I was kidding.

As of 2008, he was still on Snatch.com (I had moved back there and was looking at the landscape) and had been on reality TV because celebrity single moos are worth using for publicity.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 05, 2014
Quote
cosmictraveler
I went out once with a guy who insisted we go to Wendy's because he only liked chicken nuggets. After "dinner" in his car, he asked if I would give him a bj.

OMG what a loser!!!

Navi8orgirl, that guy - just wow. Too bad you can't rate your dates on these dating web sites a la Yelp so that others can beware.

Here's my story:

When I was in my early 20's I worked in a cafe. There was a guy who came in almost every day - he was in his early 40's and was a nice enough guy and a little eccentric (I like eccentric, much to my detriment), although he was known for being a flirt to the younger ladies on staff. He made me some mix tapes since we had similar tastes in music, and we chatted a few times. One day he asked if I'd like to join him for dinner at a local Mexican restaurant. I said sure. I wasn't really interested in dating him, but at the time a free dinner was very welcome.

Dinner went well enough, although I noticed that he must've downed a couple of pitchers of iced tea during our meal. I had a couple of margaritas and was feeling pretty good. I will admit that next I did something really stupid. He wanted to show me his apartment. I agreed to go over there with him. Luckily nothing criminal happened (I'm still amazed though at my stupidity from those days) but I'd never known he was a serious collector of Nazi paraphernalia. He had swords, art, all sorts of things. I was a little weirded out. We left after about 15 minutes.

I forget the circumstances but at some point we stopped somewhere where I got out of the car to use the restroom. When I got back, my purse was wet. Now, this guy drove a classic car that may have had some issues. I used to own an old Honda that leaked fluid onto the passenger side floor. However, my purse had a weird smell...to this day I wonder if he peed on it. He never did use the restroom after all of that tea.

On the drive back to my neighborhood, he started off on some rant out of nowhere about how he feels he's wasted his life, that he's never married and never had kids, blah blah, regretful that he missed the Lifescript boat basically. I don't think I said anything, just listened. It was kind of scary actually. He was very upset and I was kind of like, "whatever" but he was driving so I tried to appear understanding.

I saw the guy a few times after this but soon after started dating someone and left that job. Sometimes I want to go back in time as my current self and give my young self a bitch slap.
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 05, 2014
After reading some of these, you will see why I mostly identify as single and rarely date at all.

When asking me to go on a first date:
- one fellow was cleaning the wax out of his ears repeatedly using his car key
- one fellow stared at my breasts the whole conversation
- one guy held my hand and explained in a gentle and patronizing tone that I could not possibly be child-free and did not know my own mind / destiny
- one fellow met me while I was doing a hobby that I am extensively involved in, but announced that I must discontinue it because meeting guys while doing the hobby meant I was a slut.
- one fellow told me to stop talking so much
- one guy left creepy notes and flowers on my car windshield, even though I was 20 feet away at a casual, open workplace
- one guy insulted the available drinks (about 15 different) at my home, when he showed up uninvited
- one guy said that I had "good child-bearing hips" having ignored that I was very publicly child-free
- one fellow announced that although I could be very informed /educated about a topic, that I should always defer to his opinion and his information, especially when other people were around
- one fellow harangued me about being child-free, while eating my food. He was one of the most negligent fathers I had ever met (ie no child support, no child-care, etc)

On the first date:
- one fellow showed up 36 hrs late (for no particular reason) and had no phone contact. He wondered why I was unwilling to date and seemed angry.
- one fellow lied about having a wife and living with her
- one guy showed up with no money at all and expected me to pay for both of us. (I always bring my own $$$ to buy my own and expect the same)
- one fellow talked non-stop about his wife (separated) and no other topic
- one fellow lied about having kids because he wanted to date me
- one fellow lied about having a common-law wife and living with her and her child ( claimed single status for himself)
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 05, 2014
Chapter 2-Cthulhu Forgets His Wallet

It was New Year's Eve, 1999, into the new millennium we headed. Me and a few friends got VIP passes to a beach bar (I wanted something elegant but the guys wanted to hit on local talent.) I meet this guy and after several Ketel Ones did not object to a millennium snog. He was a good kisser and cute to boot. Closing time rolled around, he asked me out and I accepted. He called two days later. We spoke for a long while on the phone, where he told me he just moved here from Seattle (I remember vaguely from NYE) and was learning his way around the town. I had moved from the Seattle area six months before, so I had some idea. We agreed to meet at a gas station and I would drive to a local hotspot full of restaurants.

First he was lost. I had gone to three stations before finding the one he was at. I chalked it up to being new, but was slightly annoyed. He brought flowers...carnations, not too pricy. I thought that was nice of him.

We get to where we are going, and of all the interesting places to eat he picks Ruby Tuesday. Meh, but what the hell. We get a table. He orders one of those fishbowl margaritas and puts most of it away (we were sharing, I think.) Then a second. Dinner comes, and while I stayed practical, he did not. He also really did not eat it. Finally the bill comes, he gives his card. It comes back declined. Card 2: declined. Card 3: declined. Waitress said there was an ATM outside. He said it was a new card, and he did not have his PIN.

So I wound up paying for the date on top of driving. Those giant fucking drinks are expensive, and I did not have any. He decided he would like to see the beach, where his vehicle was close to, and where he lived.

We get in the car and he turns into the Human Tentacle ( the cthulhu reference) and is all over me, hands down my sweater and up my skirt trying for some play. I push him off with a "what the fuck?" I decided before this that the nice gesture of the flowers was cancelled out when he had no way to pay for the expensive drinks he ordered, not to mention my gas money. And now he expected to get some?

I drove him back to his truck, and informed him that I was putting out for the one who paid for the dinner. He called a couple of days after, to brag about his brand new computer he just bought. I said I was glad to see his finances resolved and that I was no longer interested. Thank you for playing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 06, 2014
I think I was the one who suggested it and will be happy to contribute:
Bad Date #1-I met this goober on my way out of a bar I was at with friends near closing time. He claimed to work "in the music business" as does every third person in this particular city. I gave him my number and went on to the car with my friends since we lived about an hour away. We talk on the phone a few times, start playing the scheduling game and finally agree that I will meet him at his condo complex on a Sunday night after work (which was fine with me). Now, I had warned him that my Sunday night could end at 9:30 or it could end at 11:30. Oh, just whenever, he says. So I leave work at 10:00, go home to take a shower and change, get on the road and in near his gated community around midnight. I have to park on the street three blocks away and call him to let me in. After bitching about how late it was, he rattled off some numbers because he was too lazy to walk down to the gate to buzz me in. This annoyed me because we were supposed to be going to a late night cafe so I don't know why he didn't come on down. After 4 attempts to put the number in, and 4 more failures, he huffed and complained and finally came down. After he got outside the gate, I slammed it shut and he couldn't get the gate open himself. I said good night and walked back to my car and drove home. He later called me to bitch that I gave him the flu. Yeah, whatevah dude.

Bad Date 2
This little gem was the VP of a major bank chain that had just bought out a local chain and cost quite a few people their jobs. We agreed to a lunch date, but after those exchanges I could tell there just wasn't any chemistry or anything in common. We met for lunch at an upscale BBQ place and he wanted to extend the date. Just reaching for an excuse to end this disaster, I quickly said that it was my day off and I really, really needed to go to Wal-Mart. He went on this 15 minute tirade about how Wal-Mart costs jobs and ruins Main Street (keeping in mind he worked for a bank that also did this) until I just sort of stood up and backed toward the door after having dropped some cash on the table.

The Bad Date that Never Happened
Even though my online profile clearly stated I would not date anybody with kids, I still got an e-mail from a 50ish trucker with a long, grey beard standing by his rig who had just got out jail, stopped using meth, found Jesus and was hoping to rebuild his relationship with his 8 adult kids who didn't talk to him as well as make some new kids. I could not delete that one fast enough.
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 06, 2014
I'll just sort of put all these different guys under the category of Wannabe Food Critics:
1st Guy-Suggested an Italian restaurant and then spent the whole meal talking how unhealthy it was that I ate regular pasta instead of wheat
2nd Guy-Complained about how fattening the white rice in the sushi rolls were at the restaurant that he picked
3rd Guy-Proceeded to lecture me on the many evils of pork for the entire meal because I had a bacon cheeseburger
4th Guy-Gave me a lengthy lecture about how fat my meal would make me in 10 years and that a portion of my meal would give me cancer.
5th Guy-Picked the restaurant that was less than a mile from his house. It was a crowded area that neighbored a busy college campus that strictly patrolled their lots. Instead of walking or using the pay lot like did, genius parked on campus without a permit and got towed.
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
May 28, 2014
Pardon me for being late to this thread, just noticed it!

My worst date was, coincidentally, my very first date. I was 18 when a 16y.o. in my art class asked me out. He was funny (always a plus) but was a smoker and for bonus points was also our neighbood paperboy. Within an hour of saying "yes" I had second thoughts, just a weird feeling of not wanting to go. Why'd I say yes, then? Because he asked! Nobody had asked me out before him.

OK, "Bill" picks me up, is very polite to my parents, no problem. Then he goes to pick up two buddies. I'm feeling a little freaked out but don't say anything. We go to the apartment of a buddy's sister, in a complex sort-of in the boonies. WTF! Fortunately, the sis was home. My date and his friends then bring out a red glass bong and proceed to smoke Marlboros with it. One of them gave me a Pepsi so full of Everclear I could smell it; took one little sip and left the rest.

The worst of this was I let Bill kiss me three times! And an awful kisser he was, too, like Frenching an oyster.::brbl Anyway, he asked if I wanted to go out again. Uh, no thanks!

Fortunately, I met my better half less than a year later, and we're still together after 29 years (almost 25 years married). He's Bill's exact opposite, thank God!
Anonymous User
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
June 07, 2014
SOOOO late to the thread, but I really wanted to chime in on this one...

Worked at a pizza joint in my late teens/early 20s, and a fucking hot cook asked me out, so we set up a date for that Saturday, after we closed. We went to a movie. On the way to the theater, I started to feel fucky (I later learned that the fuckiness was an impending migraine). About halfway through the movie, I told him I had a really bad headache and was going to be sick. He showed no concern- didn't even think to come outside of the theater, in case we had to leave. I went and puked, then had to go find him in the loud, bright-screened (but otherwise pitch black) theater, and tell him to take me home. He takes me home, and has the fucking nerve to ask if he can kiss me.

What the fuck.

So, after bad date, he starts acting like an asshole at work, picks fights with everyone, including me, then gets fired.


Another one: met a cute Italian friend of a friend (already three marks in his favor), and went on a couple of good dates, before the bad one. He told me he was separated (I had no problem with that; his house was even half-empty bc wifey cleared her shit out of it, and it looked quite spartan, as a result). Divorce was going to be finalized any moment. (According to him, i had a perfect body, but would look even hotter if i gained 20 or 30 lbs - this is relevant, i swear, just bear with me). I learned she worked in the same building as me, but I'd never seen her (or, didn't realize I had, until later). During this date, he forgot what he told me before, and I learned that neither one of them had even filed for divorce. Date over immediately, followed by the "how come you haven't called me back" messages on my voicemail. Later on, at work, I ran into the wife, who I had seen before, who was a pudgy midget. I had to laugh about that one. Mondo jackass.
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
June 11, 2014
I'm late here too, but have been reading with much interest!

And, I guess I've been lucky in this regard. Not a whole lot of 'creeps' - my exH turned out to be a Wanna Breed - I'm not sure which is worse? The creeps you can spot, or the slick manipulator who'd you'd never have guessed ~

I have been 'keeping to myself' because I have to be focused on work, and was recovering from a serious (nearly died) illness. Not looking. Plenty look at me though - which I encountered today.

I mostly just spend time with my work mates, a few friends, and neighbors, and go to the store (grocery shopping / necessities). I'm not out having a Wild Party Time. I have to be focused on work. And improving my health.

In my free time, I go around like a Slob. Hey, I have to put on the monkey suit for work, I like to be comfortable in my free time. Wash off make up, hair up in pony tail + baseball hat, raggedy jeans, plain T shirt or sweater, coat as necessary for weather.

I had two Old Weirdos literally *staring at me* in the store this eve. angry smiley

I got my own personal Slob Burkha happening here - Nothing to see here! Can't you leave me alone?

At least they didn't try to hit on me. The one, in front of me on line at the store - Very Old Geezer with Equally Old Wife. Almost gave himself whiplash with the constant turning around to look at me smile rolling left righteyes2

Then, on a whim, I decided to get one of these "Powerball" lottery tickets. I saw it on the tv news. What the hell -

I am not all that familiar with how this works - and we have the 'machines' here - the 'vending machines' of lottery tix - this store does have that kind.

I don't really understand it all so I have to take time and look, OK - here's the "Powerball Button" - it's $2, I have to put in two, OK, I think I got it ~

I do all this, it apparently worked - I hear things happening in the machine, I look in the metal trough for the ticket, I do see it ~

And when I bent down to retrieve it - I notice this Old Creeper sitting on the bench beside the Lottery Machine - who's been watching me the whole time ~

ERG

--- Actual Date Creep ---

The more I see / read about these MRA / PUA types - the more I think one guy I went out with, very briefly, I do think now that he was trying to *work these tactics* on me!

Hella rude JERK! I mean - FLAMING ASSHOLE!!!!

Seeing some of these online discussions, and reflecting back - I think this guy did mention - Art? Tom? Lykis? Some crazy guy.

IIRC the guy mentioned it and then eyerolled it, like he thought that all was BS.

But - now that this stuff is more 'out there' - I'm remembering stuff from the past that 'syncs up' with these people's "advice".

Like deliberately act like a jerk. Try to undermine the woman's self esteem. Act like you're too good for her. Keep her guessing.

There were a few men who tried this stuff on me. Seeing it spelled out now - I reflect back and remember the same type of manipulative BS being tried on me.

Sigh. But at least I spotted some of it and got the hell OUT! And as I said - my exH kept his true agenda for me very well hidden.

There's All Types Manipulators out there - WATCH IT!

And All Types Creepazoids - you can't even avoid them in your Slob Burkha at the Lottery Machine!

GAH
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
June 12, 2014
Quote
Zzelda
I got my own personal Slob Burkha happening here - Nothing to see here! Can't you leave me alone?

I assume you're dressing like a slob because it's comfortable, because it sure as hell doesn't work when it comes to keeping creeps at bay, no matter how much rape culture likes to equate clothing choice with how other people behave.

Personally, I've been harassed more with the sweatpants/ponytail look than when dressed nicely.

I can't really contribute to the bad dates thread because I haven't gone on "dates". I'm more used to just hanging out with people (often in groups), nothing so formal as a date.
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
June 12, 2014
A friend just sent this

LINK

Definitely don't want to get stuck in this kind of baby-daddy mess

Quote

“We made plans to go out, and I knew from a previous conversation with him that he had an ex-girlfriend who was pregnant with his child. When we met up, we had a good time talking and drinking all night – and then he mentioned that his child was born that very night and he had left the hospital to come meet me.”
Anonymous User
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
June 13, 2014
Quote
yurble
Quote
Zzelda
I got my own personal Slob Burkha happening here - Nothing to see here! Can't you leave me alone?

I assume you're dressing like a slob because it's comfortable, because it sure as hell doesn't work when it comes to keeping creeps at bay, no matter how much rape culture likes to equate clothing choice with how other people behave.

Personally, I've been harassed more with the sweatpants/ponytail look than when dressed nicely.

I can't really contribute to the bad dates thread because I haven't gone on "dates". I'm more used to just hanging out with people (often in groups), nothing so formal as a date.

This is my experience too. Perhaps it gives them a sense that you're "off guard" or something.

Not that it's any reason to dress one way or the other, but it just goes to show what a fantasy land the rape apologists are living in.
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
June 13, 2014
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lilin_unite
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yurble
I assume you're dressing like a slob because it's comfortable, because it sure as hell doesn't work when it comes to keeping creeps at bay, no matter how much rape culture likes to equate clothing choice with how other people behave.

Personally, I've been harassed more with the sweatpants/ponytail look than when dressed nicely.

This is my experience too. Perhaps it gives them a sense that you're "off guard" or something.

Not that it's any reason to dress one way or the other, but it just goes to show what a fantasy land the rape apologists are living in.

They've never looked at the estimated rape statistics for homeless women, have they?
Re: The bad dates thread:drinky
June 23, 2014
So, about three years ago, I met a guy through some friends. He seemed kind of quirky, but he was sort of cute in nerdy way and I thought I'd give him a chance. We went to a hibachi place that is known for its boisterous chefs and fun atmosphere. The meal itself was decent, but my date got tipsy on sake and was all over me. It was really uncomfortable and I wasn't as good at setting boundaries back then as I am now. We were sharing a hibachi table with other people, so I think the PDAs were more than a little tasteless.

I thought we were wrapping up our dinner when about four waitresses came out and sang "Happy Birthday" to me. He fucking told them it was my birthday, when it was actually three months away.

I really wanted to go the hell home, but he wanted to hang out at some bar. I grudgingly agreed. When we arrived at the bar, he ditched me and left me to sit by myself while he socialized with his friends. He didn't even bother to introduce me to them. Then he tried to come over to where I was sitting to start his inappropriate PDA routine. I told him I was tired from the work day, and really had to get home.

He dropped me off at my building and asked if he could walk me upstairs. I said "nope" and got the hell out of there.

Well, at least I got a free chicken and shrimp dinner out of it...

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