Family businesses, Nepotism, Why? (Can't stand my family!)

At several of places where I have worked there are people who are in the same family who work with each other, almost as if it is encouraged. I also many restaurants are family businesses and other businesses hire in their own family. My mother also tells me she lived on a farm with 11 siblings - a family farm.

Maybe it is just me, but I CAN"T STAND my family! Why would I want to work with them? Anybody here in that situation? I'd like to know how you deal with it.

I like my family well enough, but it seems very constraining to me to be forced into the same career choice. Plus any tensions at home are hard to get away from; there's no alone time. It's also financially risky because if the business goes under, everyone in the family will suffer.

I am sure there are various reasons to participate in a family business, such as enjoying the work and wanting a sense of continuity. Or it may be a case of limited financial resources in the family, which go further if shared in a joint venture. Dealing with discrimination and limited opportunities can be another reason to stay in the family business. All of these reasons seem valid to me. I have to admit even I find it impressive when you read about businesses in Japan that have been in continual operation for over 1000 years, run by the same family.

But I have also seen plenty of cases where a useless and untalented member of the family is given a position, to the detriment of the business. For that person, I'm sure it is easier to step into a role than make a place in the world, and to get away with laziness and incompetence that would get you fired anywhere else. And of course the person doing the hiring is usually the breeder, trying to protect their spawn from the consequences of being useless.

I was very VERY strongly considering switching majors from graphic design to mortuary science and the family business shit is one of the biggest reasons I decided against it (that and I can't stand the smell of formaldehyde). I guess a lot of funeral homes are family run because it makes it look more stable and trustworthy to be "Jones & Sons Funeral Home" rather than "Jones Funeral Home," and it's more a field you're born into rather than one you break into, it seems.

Plus there's another aspect to family business: how many of the family members are voluntarily working there? How many are guilted into it or are discouraged from finding employment elsewhere? Then people who have zero interest in running a business are forced into that position because if they don't take over the family business, it'll disappear and everything their parents or whoever worked for will be for nothing. So someone with no know-how or desire picks up the reins, and usually runs the place right into the ground within five years because they don't know what they're doing.

And it can suck to work in such places when you are not part of the family because the favoritism for the relatives will be very obvious and you'll feel like an outsider.

There are also legal loopholes when the business is family-run. Underage children can work and not be paid. A 10-year old can’t get a job as a cashier at a grocery store, but if their family owns the grocery store, then they can run the register. Bob’s Burgers even said this outright in an offhand comment. Somebody mentions how cute it is that his kids work in the restaurant and he says it’s more to do with he fact that he doesn’t have to pay them than anything else.

Also, for the successful businesses, it ensures a legacy to be passed on. It’s security for the kids that they don’t have to worry about job searching, applications, and interviews when they’re ensured a position in the family business. Depending on the business and the family, they can just walk into a high-level role and be lazy as shit while the plebes beneath them do all the work for significantly less pay.

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