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My Sperm Donor died of COVID....what do I do now?

Posted by bell_flower 
My Sperm Donor died of COVID....what do I do now?
May 15, 2021
Apropos of nothing, I've noticed there seems to be a rash of "my husband the breadwinner died of COVID and Moo/Wifey needs financial advice" articles in various publications.

This one is from the WSJ. (Requires a subscription to the WSJ to view.)

Wife/Moo who stayed out of the workforce for 16 years to raise three boy brats lost her 53 year old husband last July. She is currently working a $66,000/year job that she's lucky to have. I've noticed in many of these situations the husband did not have life insurance to maintain the lifestyle, and this one is a perfect example. I don't know whether it is being cheap, or having health concerns and not being able to afford the premiums or whether they do not care what happens to Wifey after they are gone in a passive-aggressive way. Life insurance is not mentioned in this particular story.

HOWEVER, note this Moo is not hurting AT ALL. She's currently living in a $650,000 house. Of course, this did not stop her friends from starting a $15,000 GoFleeceMe account to help with college expenses for one of her sons.

Stories like these are a prime reason I do no contribute to individual GoFleeceMe drives unless I absolutely know the person in question is hurting financially. (I still remember Jennifer Perillo, who got $190k under the pretense that she was about to lose her home when she was widowed, but didn't have the smarts to not Instagram the pricey food and Marc Jacob boots she was buying during that time.)

I wonder if anyone who contributed to this GFM knew this woman had $200,000 in cash lying around, various retirement accounts, four cars and a net worth (including house equity) of around $520,000, not counting college funds.

Here is the financial info, copying from the article:


Ms. Kelly currently lives with her three sons, ages 22, 20 and 17. For 16 years, she stayed home to care for them. In 2013, she began working at a real-estate investment trust and now earns $66,000 annually.

Ms. Kelly has three separate individual retirement accounts: $12,000 in her own IRA, and $94,000 and $48,000 in two that used to belong to her husband. Currently, she isn’t contributing to her IRA. She also has $45,000 in a 401(k) as well as a tax-deferred annuity worth $52,000. In addition, she has $77,000 in an investment account—mostly containing individual stocks—and $200,000 in cash.

A significant expense she faces right now is her sons’ college bills. Her late husband’s friends raised $15,000 via a GoFundMe campaign to help with the costs. In addition, she has two UGMA college-savings accounts.

The account for her youngest son—who graduates from high school in 2022—has $25,000. The one for her middle son, a student at the University of Arizona, has $15,000. That sum, along with a $3,000 academic scholarship and $2,500 in tuition assistance he hopes to receive from his employer, should be enough to pay for his final year at the school, she says. Her oldest son currently attends community college and works 25 hours a week. But he hopes to return to the University of Arizona next year, and Ms. Kelly is considering paying part of the tuition.

Ms. Kelly pays $300 monthly for health insurance through her employer. She has $1,500 in a health-savings account (HSA) and a life-insurance policy worth one year’s salary. She also purchased a supplemental life-insurance plan with $50,000 in coverage.

Ms. Kelly says the family’s home is worth about $610,000 and has a $467,650 mortgage with a 2.99% interest rate. She has no other debt and owns the family’s four cars outright.
Re: My Sperm Donor died of COVID....what do I do now?
May 16, 2021
If the lower-earning partner is making $66,000 and they were able to get by for 16 years without her income, there is absolutely no reason not to have life insurance. Plus, with a kid at 17 shouldn't most of the saving for college have happened already? There are plenty of people who deserve sympathy for what covid did to their finances, but not these people.
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