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Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices

Posted by twocents 
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 19, 2021
Ouch. According to a comment further down from the author, Duh attempted to correct the kid by saying Moomy does the laundry and stuff and the kid said that wasn't much. That's gotta hurt to get called useless by your own kid, and of course Moo is gonna take it personally when a child that probably still craps its pants makes an unintentionally mean comment.

Of course all the other mommies are rushing in to make sure this one knows she has the most important, under-appreciated and underpaid job in the whole world.

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/m81748/moms_dont_do_anything/

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Husband and 5yo were picking up the kitchen after he got home from work. Dh asks kid if she knows the difference between moms and dads. She says, "moms don't do anything all day, and dads work and do stuff."

My heart broke. I'm a sahm, and I know I'm crap at it. I let the kitchen get messy. But we always have clean clothes, a not totally destroyed house. I read to her every day, play with her, feed her. And she thinks I do nothing.
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Cambion
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My heart broke. I'm a sahm, and I know I'm crap at it. I let the kitchen get messy. But we always have clean clothes, a not totally destroyed house. I read to her every day, play with her, feed her. And she thinks I do nothing.

Spend less time up your kid's ass and more time parenting, and she'd probably change her tune.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 19, 2021
The same complaint was made by a duh, so it isn't specific to moos. It is specific to stay at home parunts. And they are all saying their brats will figure it out once they grow up and have their own brats.

Some of their situations are 100% caused by their bad habits. If they don't set boundaries and establish themselves as the adult then they are going to live in pandemonium. And it doesn't matter how much they clean, do laundry, etc. if it is constantly being messed up because their five year old has been taught that is perfectly acceptable. It is going to look like they do nothing.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 20, 2021
Oh definitely, I hear plenty of complaints on there from Moos about how their man-baby husbands accuse them of sitting around the house all day doing nothing while Mr. Man goes to his "real" job. I guess it hurts more coming from the awful little bastard they do everything for because Junior is supposed to wuv them for all the sacrifices they make and all that shit.

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freya
Some of their situations are 100% caused by their bad habits. If they don't set boundaries and establish themselves as the adult then they are going to live in pandemonium. And it doesn't matter how much they clean, do laundry, etc. if it is constantly being messed up because their five year old has been taught that is perfectly acceptable. It is going to look like they do nothing.

Yup, I think you hit the nail on the head. Mommies are not seen as much of an authority figure because they let their brats walk all over them, refuse to discipline them or have any expectations of them. But then if they were to be competent parents, their kids might see them as the "enemy" and they're often so worried about being their kids' friends that they will choose to let their kids rule the roost instead of parenting them. When the kids have no competent or consistent parenting, the Moos wonder why their kids aren't magically well-adjusted cherubs. It's not like a plant that you can throw outside and neglect and it might thrive without your help. Kids need guidance.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 22, 2021
not breaking mom, but still reddit, a 'JustNoSo' post (I was banned from it for pointing out the truth in blunt terms). these assholes ...fucking assholes... frankly I'd say is you are fucking depressed, you take goddam anti depressants but you think it's such a good idea to breed. YOU PICKED IT YOU DUMB CUNT. BOOOO FUCKING MOOHOO.

I am almost at the point I think they deserve the misery, but no one deserves it but they sure as hell bring it on themselves. this is a long post. I think this bint should just look in the mirror and think 'You picked this, you chose this...deal with it.'.. Bed. Made. Lie. but they don't like to hear that....onward (btw, this was one long paragraph, I didn't bother to try and make the breaks in logical places, I couldn't not be arsed to do this. If she's writing, she sure as hell does NOT understand punctuation in this resepct. PARAGRAPHS YOU BIMBO..)

"My husband works from home, and I am a stay at home mom (not by choice). I am finishing my doctoral thesis, which has now dragged on for a while because of depression and other issues. It’s always been a sore point for me, and that’s my husband’s only concern when we talk. ‘But have you finished writing’, ‘will you finish writing’, ‘let’s talk about this when you’re finished’. And he uses this for everything. He doesn’t help at home with anything. I mean ANYTHING. The only thing he does everyday is put his dirty dinner dish on the counter or in the kitchen sink (if I’m lucky).

I had to have a breakdown before he started taking our son 14 months postpartum on Sundays for a few hours to give me a break. I go to therapy and started on antidepressants not long ago, which have helped me with my mood and lately I don’t care about whether he helps or not, but that made me more upset. Especially on the weeks where my son is sick and I can’t take him to daycare (2 days a week because it’s so darn expensive). That means I am on mentally and physically for 7-15 days with no break at all because husband is usually also sick when toddler is sick.

They’re both allowed to be sick, and since I am not I can try my best to be helpful. But when you’re running on fumes already, and you’re barely getting a breather, it really sucks that he doesn’t help. I asked reddit, and they told me to have a conversation. Which I do often, and he doesn’t really respond. I asked him this time what he expects me to do at home, he says he doesn’t know. I asked him what he wants to do. He says he does know. After back and forth, he says he feels he does everything (without giving examples or details). Then I show him a breakdown of everything I do, daily, weekly, monthly and so on.

Both for our home and our son. I asked him if he could just pick one daily and one weekly chore. He said wash clothes. We already tried that. He expected me to tell Him, then he would do in when he’s ready. Dirty Clothes would overflow. He expected me to sort it and tell him how. Then remind him which to dry and which to hang up. (We have a communal wash room), by this time we don’t have enough hang space. Everything smells, and I had to redo it. Along with the dirty laundry that already was piling up again. This took 2 weeks to correct. So after he said I was micromanaging him and I go too much in detail. He said that I shouldn’t worry about such details and just worry about my thesis instead.

I felt soooo gaslighted , but I don’t know if it’s the right feeling. First I felt like we had a good talk because I said he could just throw the trash and wash the floors. But when I sat thinking about it, I felt so bad about myself. Like I was just made fun or. He’s so good at twisting words, and he’s so good with words. I don’t know how to handle this situation. Anyway. By the end of 10 days. This man has picked up the trash 2 times. 2 days the trash overflow and he didn’t try to just put it aside. Then it was by the front door for 2 days (I put it there).

The floor is dirty so no one has touched the floors. I really don’t know. If I should just let it be disgusting or what. I asked him if he could empty the dishwasher instead. If he forgets to throw the trash out because he has to go out and down the elevator (the whole process takes 2 minutes). Nothing happened. I am so upset. Do I work for this man, am I a servant. Am I a roommate. I definitely don’t get paid enough. He gets upset I use too much money on amazon (food and clothes for us and mostly toddler), but he’s ordering stuff for 100s and food delivery at weird hours. I don’t know anymore. We’re expats in a foreign country. I don’t have money or any family to go to. I am trying my best to solve this diplomatically, but Oh, I don’t know how much longer I can hold on"

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 22, 2021
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If she's writing, she sure as hell does NOT understand punctuation in this respect. PARAGRAPHS YOU BIMBO..

This woman must be getting a doctorate from a mail order university. Her writing is atrocious.

(And note: most doctorates have pretty hard schedules, but having a kid gets you an automatic pass, while other life situations that you have no control over will not. Just another example of our Breederific world.)

And of course there is the familiar Reddit refrain:

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I don’t know anymore. We’re expats in a foreign country. I don’t have money or any family to go to.

Are all these women the same person? Away from family, broke, in shitty marriages yet knocked up or birthing baybees, no access to money...how about making the guy work a little harder for the poontang? What is attractive about an arrangement where you give up all access to money and shit out a baybee for someone and they get to treat you like crap?

Presumably this woman has a master's degree and let's hope she's employable.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 22, 2021
While I think it's great Moo has taught her toadler how to enforce boundaries with others, just wait until this sassy little diva goes to school. I'm sure Moo won't be as proud of herself when her child's teacher calls to say that Princessita refused to sit in her seat, come back from recess, do her classwork or listen to anything and when she was reprimanded, she put her hands on her hips, wagged her finger and said, "Teacher, I said no and you need to respect my no!"

It will also stop being cute at home in a hurry when Bratlina decides to use this line every single time Moo tells her to do something and the kid refuses. Kid's gonna have to learn that some no's don't get respected.

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/mau8k3/mama_i_said_no_and_you_need_to_respect_my_no/

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Said to me by my 3yo with her hands on her hips last night when I told her she needed to go potty before bed.

I was so proud of her for standing up for herself, so proud of myself for teaching her consent and confidence....and trying not to laugh while at a loss for what to say next.

We worked it out and she was able to still go potty before bed and maintain her bodily autonomy lol.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 22, 2021
Another boo hoo Reddit whiner. What is the secret to freedom? Pity you did not engage what little brains you have before you spread and bred. You saw this coming. I am beginning to have little sympathy, save for the kids. You point out the obvious to these morons, especially about the oncoming train. And they still insist on staying on the track.

"Hi Guys,

I’m not sure how to post anomonously so if you can please not share this that would be great. Just seeking advise. Thank you.

I had my MIL on recording threatening to kill me and my two kids but as an act to “protect” his mom, my fiancé deleted the video and now I’m left with nothing..but fear.

For all the women that were in living situations that were unsafe due to mental, emotional and physical abuse...how did you get out?

If you had no family, friends, money, or car...How did you escape? How did you take your kids with you? How did you find the motivation to keep living each day? How did you mask your pain from your children?

When you did finally escape, how did you find yourself again? How did you calm the trauma within your kids and yourself? How did you cope with being a single parent? Did you ever feel you made the wrong choice?

I have so many questions... I am scared... I need your help. I see the emotional trauma it is and has caused on both my children, and it breaks my soul that I can’t protect their hearts.

I’m not asking for pitty. I’m not asking for money. I’m not asking you to offer me your home. I’m not asking for judgment.

All I’m asking for is strength, advise and for someone to tell me that everything will be okay in the end.

What’s the secret to freedom?"" Get off your ass you stoopid moo and protect your children. Protect your children from your misery. fuck you. you should have thought about it before you hitched your wagon to this bastard.

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
Re: the doctoral student with useless partner...there were likely symptoms that he was a lazy slob before sperm and egg even collided. She probably doesn't wanna hear that.

He isn't going to change. She probably doesn't wanna hear that, either.

He is using "supporting" her writing time to distract and/or manipulate her. Again, something she probably doesn't wanna hear.

Bottom line: he will continue along path of least resistance/easiest outcomes and find ways to sabotage any plans to share the emotional and physical workload.

Only solution I can think of: hire a maid, and he pays for it. Followed by sterilization for both partners. They should not be having any more children. Also, I see divorce in their future.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 23, 2021
I don't know if it is confusion causing the bad writing but I seriously question her ability to complete a doctorate.

Lazy duhs will do ANYTHING to avoid parunting or house chores, even to the point of gaslighting. Most of the men on breakingmom exhibit this common characteristic. It is practically normalized there it is so common. These moos would probably be much better off finding a parenting board where parents respect their spouses and have appropriate boundaries in their families. They could then compare themselves to a healthy dynamic. I don't know if such a place exists.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 23, 2021
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freya
Lazy duhs will do ANYTHING to avoid parunting or house chores, even to the point of gaslighting. Most of the men on breakingmom exhibit this common characteristic. It is practically normalized there it is so common. These moos would probably be much better off finding a parenting board where parents respect their spouses and have appropriate boundaries in their families. They could then compare themselves to a healthy dynamic. I don't know if such a place exists.

Yup, a lot of guys (usually breeder men) will gladly live in a complete pigsty surrounded by dirty plates, trash, empty bottles, dirty clothes, bodily fluids and vermin just so they can continue being lazy bastards. Most of them will work harder to stay lazy than whatever effort it would require to do something domestic like washing a dish, changing a diaper or putting their clothes in the hamper instead of on the floor around it. No amount of any sort of reaction from the Moo-wives helps either - screaming, crying, arguing, denying sex, not cleaning up after the asshole, having a breakdown, positive reinforcement (I have heard of more than one Moo using a sticker chart for her incompetent husband).

I think a lot of them figure their mommies did all this shit for them, so they only need to pretend to pick up after themselves when they're still trying to bag a mate and then once they've secured her, she can take over where Mommy left off and do everything for him.

Meanwhile, I suspect a lot of these Moos came from fucked-up homes with narcissistic parents and grew up thinking that being treated like crap is perfectly normal and that standing up for yourself is a bad thing, so they have no idea what constitutes a healthy or normal relationship until they reach their breaking point and by then they've already bred multiple times with the lazy bastard in question. Many of them are also financially dependent on the Duhs because they choose to be SAHMs in order to save on daycare costs, so they're trapped in multiple ways.

Even the rare times they do manage to get away from their shitty spouses, they'll proceed to get back into another relationship within a year with the exact same kind of lazy fuck and start the whole process over again, making even more kids and wondering why their lives still suck because they refuse to fucking learn from their mistakes.

Then the cycle gets perpetuated in another generation as these kids they make grow up in dysfunctional homes seeing their fathers sit around doing fuck all and paying them no mind while Moo plays house. The kids will grow up to marry the same kind of assholes (and they can be male or female) and suffer the same fate as their retarded handlers because it's what they grow up with and presume to be normal.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 24, 2021
Apparently pesky non-parents aren't allowed to remind breeders that they chose to have kids when they bitch and complain about how hard everything is.

Unlike some life choices, kids are totally voluntary. It's not like choosing to get a college degree that you absolutely need to get a certain job, or choosing to undergo surgery that you absolutely need to save your life. Nobody needs to have kids and never have I heard someone complain as much about anything as people with kids. You'd think one of them would take the hint that with so much complaining every single parent does every fucking second of every fucking day, maaaaaybe it's not worth it after all?

Compare it to other voluntary things that are difficult. Like yeah, writing your dissertation is hard, but it's worth it in the end when you get your master's degree. Doing two years of physical therapy after a tractor runs over your pelvis is hard, but it's worth it when you can walk again. Losing weight is hard, but it's worth it when you're a healthy weight and aren't out of breath from walking up your front steps anymore. House/apartment hunting can be rough, but it's worth it when you finally find your perfect place to live.

Raising kids is hard, unnecessary and is often times not worth it for one reason or another, be it financial strain, loss of a good relationship (or entrapment in a bad one), childhood illnesses (or just basic maintenance of a completely normal child), loss of social life, new onset stress/anxiety/depression and tons of other things.

Like how fucking worthwhile can breeding be when it's so awful that there is a form of depression exclusive to parents caused by having kids? What exactly did they think it was going to be like? Taking care of a sack of flour like in high school? Why is every single breeder completely, utterly shocked by how awful parenthood is? Funny how CFers magically manage to figure this shit out before breeding. Why can't they do the same?

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/mbkqq2/you_chose_to_have_kids/

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Whenever I see a parent complain about the hardships of parenthood around a non-parent this inevitably comes up. You chose this. You don’t get to complain. What? First of all, I would say that most people are completely unaware of what parenthood is like before they have kids. There’s not a great way to understand just how tough it is until you’re in it. And there’s not always a great way to know if you’re suited for this lifestyle or not.

I love my children more than anything. And as they grow older it only gets better. But this is the single hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life. I am sleep deprived. My self-care has vanished. I have to choose between eating, sleeping or doing the dishes. I am allowed to complain. I am allowed to vent. I am not “gate-keeping” being tired when I tell a child free person the “tired” that new moms experience is just different.
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Cambion
https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/mau8k3/mama_i_said_no_and_you_need_to_respect_my_no/

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Said to me by my 3yo with her hands on her hips last night when I told her she needed to go potty before bed.

I was so proud of her for standing up for herself, so proud of myself for teaching her consent and confidence....and trying not to laugh while at a loss for what to say next.

We worked it out and she was able to still go potty before bed and maintain her bodily autonomy lol.

This has been bugging me because it sounds so implausible. I mean, is a three year old capable of understanding these words and forming them into a sentence? Or understanding consent and "bodily autonomy"? Sounds like moomy made up this bullshit after the kid became defiant.
Hahahahaha, take the hint, grandma! You are too fucking old to be doing this again!

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So I’m 10 weeks pregnant with my 2nd. First is 6.5 years old. I have my first ultrasound tomorrow and I’m just a ball of nerves. Plus we can’t find anyone to take the kid so my husband can’t come with me.

And today while taking my kid out for a walk/ride a woman who let my kid pass and they said hi, asked me if I was my kids grandma.

Like, I’m 43, but I have no grey hair, I had on sunglasses so there was no visible eye wrinkles but apparently to her I looked like a grandma.

And this wasn’t a 20 yo who thinks everyone is ancient this woman was at minimum 10 years older than me, probably 15.

I just- today was not the day to hear this. I told my best friend and Her response was “oh brutal” not “you don’t look like a grandma” (like wtf even if I DO, lie to me already)

Anyway I’m a disaster who looks like a grandma that’s my life now.

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/mbw7il/just_need_some_bromo_virtual_hugs/
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 24, 2021
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toraneko
This has been bugging me because it sounds so implausible. I mean, is a three year old capable of understanding these words and forming them into a sentence? Or understanding consent and "bodily autonomy"? Sounds like moomy made up this bullshit after the kid became defiant.

It does, and you know these Moos would not be above making shit up to make their lives seem less dull, but I also know it's not entirely unreasonable for kids to parrot things their parents say/do without actually knowing what it means. Like maybe Bratlina overheard Moo saying "I said no and you need to respect my no" to the Duh or an employer or whoever, but that might also require the sense to know how to apply that statement to the appropriate situation. But no, odds are you're right and she's just making things up so she can finally put a "brag" or "warm fuzzies" tag on her post instead of the typical negative tags.



And LOL, why is the Moo-not-Grandmoo surprised? Having kids ages you HORRIBLY, and just because her crow's feet are covered by sunglasses doesn't mean she may still not look older than she really is. Or maybe she does look her age, give or take a few years - it's not unheard of for a woman in her 40s to be a grandmother. I'm guessing she won't take the hint that while she may not be old in general, she's too old to be reproducing again.
Good point. I'd forgotten what parrots brats tend to be. Moomy's favorite phrase is probably "respect my no".
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 26, 2021
Moo is getting all huffy because Duh said he wants her to submit an application to his employer for him for 12 weeks of paternity leave, but also doesn't want to pull the crotchfruits out of daycare. He wants a 12-week vacation with minimal child contact.

Apparently there's a chance the loaves' daycare would be in touch with the employer and if they find out the semen demons are at daycare while Duh is on parental leave, it might be fraud.

Welp, I'd call this a pretty huge indication of what to expect from this guy in regard to parenting. Can't even get off his lazy ass to submit his own leave paperwork. But I'm sure this woman will come back to the sub continuously to cry about how lazy and selfish her husband is like it's a big fucking surprise.

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/md7rd4/useless_man_wants_me_to_make_it_easier_for_him_to/

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Had a baby last July and took 16 weeks off before going back to work. Asked husband if he wanted to take his leave after me (were in WA so they have paid family leave now) and he said no, find them a daycare blah blah blah.

So I did and it’s been fine I guess. He had to take Tuesday off to watch the toddler and baby because daycare was closed. I got home and the house was a disaster, he was playing on his phone, baby had a diaper rash, and there was no plans for dinner. Okay, I know how hard it is some days. But he’s never once come home to me sitting on my phone playing while the kids destroy the house around me.

This morning he asked if I would submit his paperwork so he can take the family leave of 12 weeks pay at 90% which is what the state offers. .. “oh? Are we going to pull the girls from daycare while you do that then, so you can watch them?”

No. He wants 12 weeks of paternity leave to sit at the house and do nothing with no kids. Ummmm no. That’s not how it works. Was my 16 weeks full of joy and relaxation? No. I’m so annoyed with him and don’t even know what to say.
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Cambion
it's not unheard of for a woman in her 40s to be a grandmother. I'm guessing she won't take the hint that while she may not be old in general, she's too old to be reproducing again.

Until women started delaying having kids, wasn't it pretty normal to be a grandmother in their 40s?

Personally I think having a first child late in life (on purpose) is a desperate attempt to have the best of both worlds...establishing their own independent lives like we have, then squeezing out however many kids they can before it's too late. Damn shame considering the risks that creates for the resulting children. But to hell with the kids, right? All that matters is what the breeders want.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 26, 2021
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Cambion
Moo is getting all huffy because Duh said he wants her to submit an application to his employer for him for 12 weeks of paternity leave, but also doesn't want to pull the crotchfruits out of daycare. He wants a 12-week vacation with minimal child contact.

Did moo think he would "step up" with a second one? Something tells me he has taken a passive role with the toadler. Why have another one if it bothers her?

It seems to be a unicorn family when both parents make a constant effort to be actively engaged and share all house/brat responsibilities. I'd guess it is less than 1% of all married parents. It would be great if someone would interview several thousand married parents and figure out this exact number. The issue is, parunts comprise the majority of this group and struggle with objectivity. But some considering parenting may be swayed if they hear the reality.

Also, wanna-be breeders would be the last ones to read the article and take it seriously. They think their marriage will be 50/50 regardless of any obvious bad patterns in their spouse that they are ignoring, their spouse will miraculously become perfect after breeding and their kids will be the exception to the brat rule. They will keep breeding until they have the number of kids they decided when they were eight years old while holding out hope their spouse will "step up."
There is a disturbance in the herd. Moo senses bullshit but unfortunately still drinks the kool aid.

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Background: in literally every single story about how hard motherhood is, the author has to bend over backwards to say how much she loves her kids, how she'd do ANYTHING to protect them if they were in danger. And honestly, every time it feels like overkill.

I don't know what that deep, burning love feels like. I didn't feel it when he was born, and I don't feel it now. I like my kid a lot. I would even say I love him. I want him to feel cocooned by the love of our family.

But I don't know if it's just my particular neurobiology, or if I'm just very slow to reach motherhood levels of love. Or maybe it's that the three years since my son was born have been excruciatingly hard, so I've been traumatized by the circumstances of my life. I don't know. I feel very alone in this state of something less than intense, all-consuming maternal love.

I feel that my love for my kid is expressed in the ways I keep showing up for him and keep trying to make his life fun, adventurous, and nurtured. I have wanted to give up a thousand times. But I haven't because my love is an obligation to him, to be present and active in his life.

Can anyone else relate? I don't know. I'm not even saying that I'm unhappy. Just that it feels like something is lacking when I compare my insides to what other people say :-/

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/mdy5sm/do_you_ever_feellike_maybe_you_dont_love_your/
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 27, 2021
The comments to that thread are pretty funny. It sounds as if all of them are trying to convince themselves.

Methinks the concept of Maternal Luv has a lot of room for bullshit. Moohood sounds like a lot of drudgery, beginning when you carry and then crap out the loaf. After that, you have a sticky, annoying being attached to you 24/7 for the first few years of its life. If you are raising the kid correctly in the toadler years, you are a behavioral cop and you are trying to keep the kid from doing something stupid most of the time.

For me, something with that level of obligation would not foster a love relationship. It's a chore and I would resent it. Of course you are not going to love a chyld the same way you love another adult. Duh! For one thing, you are loving something that is half-witted (if you are lucky) and isn't even a grown up person.

And once you reach the part where the kid has its own personality, it's quite possible you may not even like each other, if you are being honest about it.

I wonder how many people would choose to associate with their parents if they were not "family."
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 27, 2021
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bell_flower
For me, something with that level of obligation would not foster a love relationship. It's a chore and I would resent it. Of course you are not going to love a chyld the same way you love another adult. Duh! For one thing, you are loving something that is half-witted (if you are lucky) and isn't even a grown up person.

And once you reach the part where the kid has its own personality, it's quite possible you may not even like each other, if you are being honest about it.

Feeling love of any kind for anyone - be it friends, family, spouses or pets - almost always comes from a gradual process of getting to know them and often choosing when and how you spend time with them. You spend time with loved ones because you've grown to know them. With kids, you're just expected to immediately fall in love with this tiny screaming asshole simply because you pushed it out of your body, and since kids have few to no redeeming qualities (and are incredibly selfish bastards), it's very hard to like or love them out of anything but obligation.

With any other person you don't want to be around, you can do anything from avoid them temporarily to going full no contact. Can't do that with kids - you can't even just leave the room for five minutes because the little fuckers will take that opportunity to destroy the entire room and hurt themselves in the process.

I'm fairly certain the only way parents grow to love their kids is because of Stockholm syndrome. But that's the whole problem - kids are the only loved ones you have to learn to love. That's a recipe for disaster and is likely why so many people resent their kids.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 27, 2021
/Follow-up to the Moo with the Duh who wants to do paternity leave + daycare. She told him his idea was stupid and he decided he will no longer pick the kids up from daycare to teach her a lesson about trying to pick fights with him and left their kids at daycare without giving the teacher a heads-up about coming to get them late.

Not that it's unheard of for breeders to weaponize their kids in order to hurt the other parent. So now she can't do anything that might come off as "fighting" or else Duh won't retrieve the sprogs from daycare. Knowing what kind of a prick these women are attracted to, I guarantee he will find any form of communication from her as fighting so he can wash his hands of his responsibilities to his own kids. No amount of re-wording the truth will convince this shitbag that what he did was unacceptable because he knew Moo would swoop in and clean up his mess.

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/me3f1x/he_left_them_at_daycare/

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Can someone please help me put into words why my husband is in the wrong because I’m so mad and he’s so nonchalant about it.

Told him this morning after being woken up to him cussing and tearing the house apart looking for his masks that it was no ones fault but his own (he tried to say everyone always wears them - I wore one 2 weeks ago and put in on the dresser where I found it) because he doesn’t pick up after himself.

Irritated and half Asleep I told him that he never helped with anything, couldn’t stop The baby from crying while I cleaned, and never did any actual cleaning himself. Decided it was a good time to tell him that him taking paternity leave while leaving the girls in daycare was the stupidest idea.

He texted me later and said if I wanted to fight then he would no longer be picking up the girls from daycare. I asked him if he said that because he had somehow deduced that they weren’t his responsibility? No answer.

He gets off at 3 and picks them up at 4. I get off at 530 and wouldn’t be able to pick them up until 6, so he picks them up. I got home at 6 and there were no kids??

The daycare is okay with it if I let her know we’ll be late, but she started taking night classes that start at 5:30 so this was a real shitty thing to do to her.

I got the girls, headed home now. And I don’t even know what to say to him because he thinks it’s a perfectly reasonable thing to say he won’t take care of his children if I want to fight??? How do I even argue with him when he just thinks he’s 100% in the right and didn’t do anything wrong?
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bell_flower
Methinks the concept of Maternal Luv has a lot of room for bullshit.

Yeah, I imagine a lot of mothers feel the way that woman does...but god forbid they admit it or society will shred them, because is there a worse pariah than a woman who doesn't subsume herself in children? So they are silent, thinking they're a freak for not losing everything they are to this random baby, when in reality it's common or even typical. But they don't know that because they can't admit it out loud. So they go through the motions of making it look like it's true, and the cycle continues.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
March 27, 2021
If I were the parental leave moo I’d drop the kids off at home, pack my shit, and leave.

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