Truu mom confessions

I'm new here, have been lurking for awhile, and finally decided to join! I've been a regular over on office confessions, and out of morbid curiousity pop over to the mom section of the pages to read about their daily disasters. Kind of jerry springerish, you just can't look away. Today there was a post that just bugged the holy shit out of me. http://www.truuconfessions.com/channels/Mom/confession/593131 Like we aren't supposed to have our own sites free from their constant condemnation to vent. they make ME sick. Every time a childfree posts there, they get the same ol line "why are you posting on a mom board?" even if the post is about something completely differnet. there are a lot of political and other discussions there, too. What I don't get is why a mom would even care about sites for us?

And of course, a moomy has to bingo themselves.

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It seems to me, whether it's a childfree person or a person who wants/has children, If you have to go around telling everyone on the other side of the choice how happy you are (or how much better you are than them), you seem more like you are trying to really convince yourself, you know?

Of course, it doesn't count towards them since they're so special.

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I walk the path of life to my own rhythm, my own beat-if you don't like it, step off and find your own damn song!

I sure as hell don't spend any time telling childed people that I'm so happy. I recognize that some people want to have children as badly as I don't want to have children. My complaints are more along the lines of the following:

• When people give misinformation about parenthood, suggesting that everything about it is great, when they are also whining about it on confession sites, and employing the old 'bitch and backpedal' routine of summarizing a 10-minute rant about what they hate about parenthood with "It's all worth it in the end." Why the hell can't people be honest in public about all that parenthood entails, so that people will make decisions out of knowledge rather than ignorance?
• When parents affect others around them (including parents) through their shitty parenting methods. The old bingo "You were children once, too" doesn't excuse lack of discipline. It is most certainly the case that attitudes toward discipline have shifted, and children today are more likely to engage in antisocial behaviors and be excused by their parents on the grounds that "She's just a child!" Furthermore, I actually do think many CF people were quiet children. Most of us are introverts; we were more likely to be the child sitting quietly in the corner reading a book than the one screaming in the restaurant. Other kids annoyed me when I was a child, so I don't see why I should feel differently now.
• When parents demand special perks by virtue of the fact that they are parents. Child tax credits, paternal leave, flex-time only available to parents, and so on. The privilege of parents is outstanding, and most of them seem completely unaware of the fact that people without children are routinely discriminated against. What else can you call it when person A gets several months of paid time away from the office with a guarantee that the job will remain available, while not suffering from any act of fate or unpredictable disease, and person B gets nothing like this? Having children is a choice, and as a choice, it should not be treated by the government and employers as having more value than other choices, such as caring for a sick relative, volunteering in Haiti, acquiring a higher-level degree, or any of the other myriad of things people might do with their time.
• When people have children without any thought or concern about the impact of overpopulation on the environment (and then suggest that they care more about the future because they have children). This is the reason that I never condone the choice to have a child, especially in a developed country where the child will consume 100x the resources it would consume in another country. This goes at least quadruple for people using IVF, because the last thing the planet needs is your genetic flaws. The chance that your child will grow up to change the world for the better is astronomically slim, but the chance that he will become yet another consumer to destroy the planet is all but given. Nobody who is already alive should be asked to die in order to give you the opportunity to perpetuate your genes, but that is exactly what is going on every time you create another mouth in a developed country to suck resources away from impoverished lands. Those who are already alive have a strong desire to remain alive, for the most part, and their rights ought to trump those of a potential person, who doesn't even exist yet. You can be a good parent in other respects, but having children at this particular point in history is still morally wrong.

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yurble
I sure as hell don't spend any time telling childed people that I'm so happy. I recognize that some people want to have children as badly as I don't want to have children. My complaints are more along the lines of the following:

• When people have children without any thought or concern about the impact of overpopulation on the environment (and then suggest that they care more about the future because they have children). This is the reason that I never condone the choice to have a child, especially in a developed country where the child will consume 100x the resources it would consume in another country. This goes at least quadruple for people using IVF, because the last thing the planet needs is your genetic flaws. The chance that your child will grow up to change the world for the better is astronomically slim, but the chance that he will become yet another consumer to destroy the planet is all but given. Nobody who is already alive should be asked to die in order to give you the opportunity to perpetuate your genes, but that is exactly what is going on every time you create another mouth in a developed country to suck resources away from impoverished lands. Those who are already alive have a strong desire to remain alive, for the most part, and their rights ought to trump those of a potential person, who doesn't even exist yet. You can be a good parent in other respects, but having children at this particular point in history is still morally wrong.

You're exactly right, Yurble. I couldn't have said it better myself especially the part about IVF. I can't believe it's even allowed given how many people are already here as well as the simple fact that PEOPLE WITH FUCKED UP GENES SHOULDN'T BREED. IF NATURE ISN'T ALLOWING IT, THEN NEITHER SHOULD MEDICAL SCIENCE MAKE IT HAPPEN. I blame fertility doctors and selfish narcissistic parents with fertlitters of fuctuplet frankenloaves as a major problem that's ultimately going to both kill the planet and corrupt the gene pool.

fertlitters of fuctuplet frankenloaves - try saying that 10 times fast

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yurble
fertlitters of fuctuplet frankenloaves - try saying that 10 times fast

What can I say? I just love using alliteration whenever I possibly can

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rainbow

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yurble
I sure as hell don't spend any time telling childed people that I'm so happy. I recognize that some people want to have children as badly as I don't want to have children. My complaints are more along the lines of the following:

• When people have children without any thought or concern about the impact of overpopulation on the environment (and then suggest that they care more about the future because they have children). This is the reason that I never condone the choice to have a child, especially in a developed country where the child will consume 100x the resources it would consume in another country. This goes at least quadruple for people using IVF, because the last thing the planet needs is your genetic flaws. The chance that your child will grow up to change the world for the better is astronomically slim, but the chance that he will become yet another consumer to destroy the planet is all but given. Nobody who is already alive should be asked to die in order to give you the opportunity to perpetuate your genes, but that is exactly what is going on every time you create another mouth in a developed country to suck resources away from impoverished lands. Those who are already alive have a strong desire to remain alive, for the most part, and their rights ought to trump those of a potential person, who doesn't even exist yet. You can be a good parent in other respects, but having children at this particular point in history is still morally wrong.

You're exactly right, Yurble. I couldn't have said it better myself especially the part about IVF. I can't believe it's even allowed given how many people are already here as well as the simple fact that PEOPLE WITH FUCKED UP GENES SHOULDN'T BREED. IF NATURE ISN'T ALLOWING IT, THEN NEITHER SHOULD MEDICAL SCIENCE MAKE IT HAPPEN. I blame fertility doctors and selfish narcissistic parents with fertlitters of fuctuplet frankenloaves as a major problem that's ultimately going to both kill the planet and corrupt the gene pool.

wink


There is NO reason, circumstance, or excuse to turn a faulty baybee oven from the off to on position, to force a tired sperm and rotten egg into a viable omelet, to mix up different human fluids to fill a turkey baster to squirt into a cow or old gray mare, or to rent the womb or purchase the jism of another person in order to make a baybee. If regular fucking doesn't do the trick or the breaker keeps tripping when the baybee oven is in use, then nature and perhaps God Almighty himself is making a statement. ALL FORMS of assisted inpigness including IVF, hormonal fertility treatments, and surrogacy should be against the law and due to the fact that existing children are dying of starvation, it's ABSURD that this shit is not only going on, but has reached epic proportions. There is NO justification for it at all and I think that it's offensive to human kind.:sbx

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

I wish they would make adoption easier. Many couples look to the IVF and IUI routes because they are actually cheaper and easier than adopting a child. If they would make the medical omelet making super expensive and adoption cheaper, then things would better for the population as a whole. I can continue to take loaves from bad Breeders (or Baby Mills as like to call them) and place them with good forever homes with people who want and can afford them.

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kbc
I wish they would make adoption easier. Many couples look to the IVF and IUI routes because they are actually cheaper and easier than adopting a child. If they would make the medical omelet making super expensive and adoption cheaper, then things would better for the population as a whole. I can continue to take loaves from bad Breeders (or Baby Mills as like to call them) and place them with good forever homes with people who want and can afford them.

I understand what you're saying about the adoption process. Personally, I have mixed feelings about it. I do agree with you, however, that adoption should be cheaper perhaps MUCH cheaper than it currently is. BUT I don't know that simplifying the adoption process is a good idea because I want adopted children to go to people that are most qualified to care for them.

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kidlesskim

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rainbow

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yurble
I sure as hell don't spend any time telling childed people that I'm so happy. I recognize that some people want to have children as badly as I don't want to have children. My complaints are more along the lines of the following:

• When people have children without any thought or concern about the impact of overpopulation on the environment (and then suggest that they care more about the future because they have children). This is the reason that I never condone the choice to have a child, especially in a developed country where the child will consume 100x the resources it would consume in another country. This goes at least quadruple for people using IVF, because the last thing the planet needs is your genetic flaws. The chance that your child will grow up to change the world for the better is astronomically slim, but the chance that he will become yet another consumer to destroy the planet is all but given. Nobody who is already alive should be asked to die in order to give you the opportunity to perpetuate your genes, but that is exactly what is going on every time you create another mouth in a developed country to suck resources away from impoverished lands. Those who are already alive have a strong desire to remain alive, for the most part, and their rights ought to trump those of a potential person, who doesn't even exist yet. You can be a good parent in other respects, but having children at this particular point in history is still morally wrong.

You're exactly right, Yurble. I couldn't have said it better myself especially the part about IVF. I can't believe it's even allowed given how many people are already here as well as the simple fact that PEOPLE WITH FUCKED UP GENES SHOULDN'T BREED. IF NATURE ISN'T ALLOWING IT, THEN NEITHER SHOULD MEDICAL SCIENCE MAKE IT HAPPEN. I blame fertility doctors and selfish narcissistic parents with fertlitters of fuctuplet frankenloaves as a major problem that's ultimately going to both kill the planet and corrupt the gene pool.

wink


There is NO reason, circumstance, or excuse to turn a faulty baybee oven from the off to on position, to force a tired sperm and rotten egg into a viable omelet, to mix up different human fluids to fill a turkey baster to squirt into a cow or old gray mare, or to rent the womb or purchase the jism of another person in order to make a baybee. If regular fucking doesn't do the trick or the breaker keeps tripping when the baybee oven is in use, then nature and perhaps God Almighty himself is making a statement. ALL FORMS of assisted inpigness including IVF, hormonal fertility treatments, and surrogacy should be against the law and due to the fact that existing children are dying of starvation, it's ABSURD that this shit is not only going on, but has reached epic proportions. There is NO justification for it at all and I think that it's offensive to human kind.:sbx

Right on, KK :yr I agree with absolutely everything you just said.

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rainbow

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kbc
I wish they would make adoption easier. Many couples look to the IVF and IUI routes because they are actually cheaper and easier than adopting a child. If they would make the medical omelet making super expensive and adoption cheaper, then things would better for the population as a whole. I can continue to take loaves from bad Breeders (or Baby Mills as like to call them) and place them with good forever homes with people who want and can afford them.

I understand what you're saying about the adoption process. Personally, I have mixed feelings about it. I do agree with you, however, that adoption should be cheaper perhaps MUCH cheaper than it currently is. BUT I don't know that simplifying the adoption process is a good idea because I want adopted children to go to people that are most qualified to care for them.

I believe the process with home study, counselling, parenting classes, and financial proof that one can afford them is a definite. They do go overboard. If you have diabetes, you can be denied a child. If you are FAT, you are denied. Really? Some people are just large. If they love and can afford a child, why can they not adopt? Are fat people bad parents? NO! It is the ridiculous red tape and the high cost of the process that pisses me off. We would definitely have more people adopting if we did not disqualify everyone. This is the main reason for overseas adoption. It is cheaper and you are not penalized for not be esthetically perfect.

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kbc

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rainbow

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kbc
I wish they would make adoption easier. Many couples look to the IVF and IUI routes because they are actually cheaper and easier than adopting a child. If they would make the medical omelet making super expensive and adoption cheaper, then things would better for the population as a whole. I can continue to take loaves from bad Breeders (or Baby Mills as like to call them) and place them with good forever homes with people who want and can afford them.

I understand what you're saying about the adoption process. Personally, I have mixed feelings about it. I do agree with you, however, that adoption should be cheaper perhaps MUCH cheaper than it currently is. BUT I don't know that simplifying the adoption process is a good idea because I want adopted children to go to people that are most qualified to care for them.

I believe the process with home study, counselling, parenting classes, and financial proof that one can afford them is a definite. They do go overboard. If you have diabetes, you can be denied a child. If you are FAT, you are denied. Really? Some people are just large. If they love and can afford a child, why can they not adopt? Are fat people bad parents? NO! It is the ridiculous red tape and the high cost of the process that pisses me off. We would definitely have more people adopting if we did not disqualify everyone. This is the main reason for overseas adoption. It is cheaper and you are not penalized for not be esthetically perfect.

Yes, I agree with you on all that KBC. I do think they go overboard with stupid inconsequential requirements like weight and minor health problems. But like you said I think the process with the steps you mentioned should remain. I do think more should be done to encourage adoption than is currently being done. Thank you for your insight into this issue

I think adoption should be advertised everywhere.

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yurble
When parents affect others around them (including parents) through their shitty parenting methods. The old bingo "You were children once, too" doesn't excuse lack of discipline. It is most certainly the case that attitudes toward discipline have shifted, and children today are more likely to engage in antisocial behaviors and be excused by their parents on the grounds that "She's just a child!" Furthermore, I actually do think many CF people were quiet children. Most of us are introverts; we were more likely to be the child sitting quietly in the corner reading a book than the one screaming in the restaurant. Other kids annoyed me when I was a child, so I don't see why I should feel differently now.

I think most CF-ers were quiet children because we were PARENTED. My parents NEVER used the "she's just a child" line. Hell no, my ass would be red from being "just a child". I've had people tell me I am the type who SHOULD have kids because I would actually parent them, but that kids are not for everyone. I knew better than to scream in public. I knew I'd be taken out and given a spanking. Now I enjoy spankings. Weird.......

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What is a home without children? Quiet. ~Henny Youngman

I don't want people who want to dance, I want people who have to dance. ~George Balanchine

"I took the batteries out of my biological clock and put them in my vibrator"

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kbc
I think adoption should be advertised everywhere.

I completely agree with this statement wink

I think it should be a law in this country that every teenager who gets knocked up has to hand her baby over to an adoption agency. That might curb some of this nonsense.

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gymrat
I think it should be a law in this country that every teenager who gets knocked up has to hand her baby over to an adoption agency. That might curb some of this nonsense.

I agree! If you start forcing teens to adopt out, they will stop shatting loaves. They how baybees are made for fucks sake. They do it because they are trying to trap some poor kid forevah! If they got no money and not brat, they would not bother.

Yurble, that was beautifully put. Wish I could record it and play it full fucking blast every time someone bingos me. You are utterly, completely fucking right.

CF_Amy, I think I buck that trend. My parents spoiled the fuck out of me and were too harsh on my brother, and as a result I have a lot of problems with the person I am and I'm constantly trying to change, but changing myself is hard, although I have been gaining headway of late. I wouldn't say my parents were breeder esque the way today's are, but I wouldn't call them PNBs either. Its actually been one of my CF motivators.