:faint The worst part of giving birth

ICK ICK ICK!!!!!! Link

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" ... what's one more once you've already got two shedding on the couch?"

OH. MY. GAWD. GROSS!!!!!!!!!!

AHHHH! Oh my fucking goddess! I can't even imagine some of this shit! I'm literally squirming and jumping in my seat reading some of these things. Why the hell would anyone ever do this?! Just fucking adopt! Jebus

All that + a kid to raise for the next 18 years + the drudgery of Mawmy Work?

No Thanks.

I'm not gonna click on that link, and you can't make me. :spin

Hearing some more birth horror stories from my co-workers just yesterday was plennnnnty. One was describing a friend who had prolapse so bad that every time she went to the bathroom, she had to "push it back in." She finally had surgery to correct it but still will be taking laxatives for the rest of her life because she can no longer push to poop. Wasted all her pushing on loaves.

The other horror story involved someone who tore so badly during loaf-shitting that she had to go to a major hospital in a much larger city for major surgical repair.

The stuff of nightmares. :drool

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Shauna's like a gluten-free Jim Jones for dumb, lifeless middle-aged women. I swear, this bitch could set fire to a orphanage and they would applaud her for bringing them light. ~ Miss Hannigan

While all of it's gross as hell, the one who looked in the mirror and saw a "deflated balloon" where her stomach used to be and "blue veined torpedoes" in the place of her boobs and then cried, bothered me the most. At no other time is it acceptable or even revered to voluntarily mutilate one's own body.

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

EWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If I can't go the bathroom normally that it's something not worth doing!!!!!....Ever! I can't understand how literally tearing parts of your body apart are "all worth it"? WTF???

What are grazes? What is a transition? Do I want to know what torture these cows are lowing about? Oh wait yes - so I know what other fresh hell I can be thrilled I'm avoiding.

You guys look and report back; like CrabCake said, I'm avoiding that place because I want to sleep tonight.

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"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny

Echoing Kim, "The first shower was fabulous and dreadful all at the same time. Being clean was fabulous but catching sight of myself in a mirror looking like a saggy stretched old balloon with blue-veined torpedos where my breasts used to be actually made me cry."

Now, I'm working on losing a few pounds....but "blue-veined torpedos" are not part of this picture.

Quote: I remember screaming in pain and having a VERY unsympathetic nurse telling me to 'grow up, you've just had a baby'
Haha! Bingo thrown at at a new moo! Grow the hell up lady, because the misery of moohood has only begun. It only gets worse from there.

Oh Jeeeeez. Like law, I had never heard of "grazes" and "transition" either, so I looked it up. Apparently a "graze" is kinda what it sounds like, only it's referring to minor tears in their hole that causes stinging upon urination. The "transition" I couldn't really find, but did find several things it could be referring to like their twats and uteri "going back" and referring to blood and other baby oven leakage and seapage. What I did find out that I didn't know was they use moo-ternity pads to catch the repulsive cunt gunk that oozes for DAYS after the loaf has been shat. I have NEVER noticed maternity pads in the feminine pads or pee on yourself sections, but apparently they are bigger and more absorbent to catch all of the twat debris and cooter oozage,

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

Maybe they're with the Depends??????

I'm on the rag right now, and reeeellly not feeling too well, so I only 'grazed' the link here.

Yeah, I have a low pain tolerance and have been injured enough as it is.

Maybe there's an upside to being a clod? I figgered out about pain early, and often, and concluded I don't want to go looking for any extra.

Uncoordinated Oaf will stick with it's Uncoordinated Oafishness. I've got a big enough Nemesis in Gravity alone.

Now that is some real Nightmare Fuel! O.o

If I were one to create definitions for these lowing cows, I would say that they 'transition' from normal human beings to placenta-brained, selfish hags who deserve every cooter mutilation they get for every bingo they hurl at us.