Waahh, being inpig is sooo haaard

I don't want to give too much away about what I do, but to sum it up, you have to be flexible and be willing to work on a tight schedule.

One of the new hires just found out she's sperm poisoned. The way she was bitching about it, I suspected there was a good chance that she'd take care of the little problem. And even if not, I thought there was a good chance that she'd stay in possession of her adult brain and realize she has shit to do, and just do it.

Apparently not.

She's now referring to the embryo as "the baby" and calling into work due to her sperm poisoning. Before she found out, she came in anyway, but now that she knows, getting her ass up off the coach would be bad for the "baaabyyy" (a.k.a. lump of tissue). It's only day 3 since she found out, so I don't imagine it will get any better. Instead, her work winds up getting dumped on other people who are willing to not only do their jobs, but also hers.

She's nearly 30, whining like a child with a runny nose. "Waahhh, I'm tired, I'm queasy, cater to me!" As if we have nothing better to do but stand around and fan her all day.

She hasn't been here long, and she wouldn't be tough to replace. I have half a mind to just tell her to get lost, if she expects us to work our deadlines around her fetus.

Why is it inpig moos always feel they have the right to demand everyone kowtow to their every whim? I'm sorry, but inpignancy is not a fucking disability. It's a biological function as ordinary as taking a shit, and if you expect me to treat you like you're a fucking special snowflake just because you managed to forget to use a condom, you are sadly mistaken. I don't call in to work if I'm constipated, and you don't get to call in just because you feel a little tired. You chose to stay knocked up. You deal with it. I don't give a fuck.

I get so fucking tired of moos expecting special treatment just because they're with parasite. If you're not even enough of an adult to show up and do your job, you have no fucking business shitting a loaf.

P.S. I was looking at the word of the day on my phone, which was parturient, meaning about to give birth; travailing. My first thought was "entrailing," thinking of the way they often shit out their own uterus or bladder, resulting in it hanging out of their vag. New slang for sluicing?

Quote
Snark Shark
". It's only day 3 since she found out"

oh gawd! it's like a tiny fucking CELL!! it's not even a babby yet!!

can you FIRE her???

Yes, I can.

I'll give it a week for her to snap into reality. I have been very clear I won't put up with this bullshit.

We'll see what happens then.

Check out my P.S. in the original post. Like?

If she's a new hire it should be easy to get rid of her, without giving a reason. I wouldn't even give her time to shape up if she's easy to replace - that just gives her more grounds for claiming that she was let go because she was pregnant and bringing suit. If she's like this now, after recently being hired, when most people know they need to prove their worth, she'll only get worse later.

Quote
lilin_unite

Quote
Snark Shark
". It's only day 3 since she found out"

oh gawd! it's like a tiny fucking CELL!! it's not even a babby yet!!

can you FIRE her???

Yes, I can.

I'll give it a week for her to snap into reality. I have been very clear I won't put up with this bullshit.

We'll see what happens then.

Check out my P.S. in the original post. Like?

She either start thinking or go away. If there are things to do, they are done, period. everything else is not on you. It is different if she has a difficult pregnancy, but those are rare and a doc has to see it and tell her, no self-diagnosys

_______________________

“I was talking about children that have not been properly house-trained. Left to their own impulses and indulged by doting or careless parents almost all children are yahoos. Loud, selfish, cruel, unaffectionate, jealous, perpetually striving for attention, empty-headed, for ever prating or if words fail them simply bawling, their voices grown huge from daily practice: the very worst company in the world. But what I dislike even more than the natural child is the affected child, the hulking oaf of seven or eight that skips heavily about with her hands dangling in front of her -- a little squirrel or bunny-rabbit -- and prattling away in a baby's voice.”


― Patrick O'Brian, The Truelove


lib'-er-ty: the freedom given to you to make the wrong decision, based on the reasoned belief that you will normally make the right one.

Quote
yurble
If she's a new hire it should be easy to get rid of her, without giving a reason. I wouldn't even give her time to shape up if she's easy to replace - that just gives her more grounds for claiming that she was let go because she was pregnant and bringing suit. If she's like this now, after recently being hired, when most people know they need to prove their worth, she'll only get worse later.

Problem is she has an iota of talent. I've given my warning, and it wasn't exactly subtle. Nothing major will happen within the next week, and I've got back-up plans if it does. What can I say -- I'm a compassionate bitch. I'm in a position where I can give her a week to get a handle on her fucktarded hormones.

She can bring a suit. All I have to do is show the records of who was doing her work. It's not "just because" anything. It's because she doesn't show up to the party. If she was just getting on with it, I'd deal with her -- even if I had to put up with the occasional bitch about her gas. But she isn't, and that's easy to prove.

Quote
t.

Quote
lilin_unite

Quote
Snark Shark
". It's only day 3 since she found out"

oh gawd! it's like a tiny fucking CELL!! it's not even a babby yet!!

can you FIRE her???

Yes, I can.

I'll give it a week for her to snap into reality. I have been very clear I won't put up with this bullshit.

We'll see what happens then.

Check out my P.S. in the original post. Like?

She either start thinking or go away. If there are things to do, they are done, period. everything else is not on you. It is different if she has a difficult pregnancy, but those are rare and a doc has to see it and tell her, no self-diagnosys

Nope, there's nothing unusual about it. She just feels vaguely shitty. Typical inpignancy stuff. She has no excuse.

I say get rid of her. She will only get worse with time. Do you honestly want to hear inpig tripe ON TOP OF doing her work for eight months or longer???

Quote
satansbitch
I say get rid of her. She will only get worse with time. Do you honestly want to hear inpig tripe ON TOP OF doing her work for eight months or longer???

With her position, she doesn't have a chance to prove herself immediately. Next time she does, I'll be watching, with two informed back-ups at the ready.

I warned her. She gets a shot to fix it.

Quote
lilin_unite

Quote
satansbitch
I say get rid of her. She will only get worse with time. Do you honestly want to hear inpig tripe ON TOP OF doing her work for eight months or longer???

With her position, she doesn't have a chance to prove herself immediately. Next time she does, I'll be watching, with two informed back-ups at the ready.

I warned her. She gets a shot to fix it.

You're a kinder human being than I am. I would be emptying shaving cream cans into her purse and stinking up her work space with Liquid Ass until she quit in tears.

Quote
satansbitch

Quote
lilin_unite

Quote
satansbitch
I say get rid of her. She will only get worse with time. Do you honestly want to hear inpig tripe ON TOP OF doing her work for eight months or longer???

With her position, she doesn't have a chance to prove herself immediately. Next time she does, I'll be watching, with two informed back-ups at the ready.

I warned her. She gets a shot to fix it.

You're a kinder human being than I am. I would be emptying shaving cream cans into her purse and stinking up her work space with Liquid Ass until she quit in tears.

Eh, gives me time to start the search. If she steps up, then all the easier for me.

Yeah, I have a soft spot with people who show some glimmer of ability, but within limits.

She might come round. She's not completely retarded. She understands she needs this, because honestly, she's in no position to be having a kid, and now she understands I'm not going to coddle her and make other people do her work.

Honestly, I think this is the work of the duh-to-be. She did a total 180 in 24 hours, and I think it's because he's being all Kodak moment about their ill-timed little accident.

Hopefully I was the cold bucket of water she needed to bring her back to reality.

I wonder if she realizes that not showing up to work affects her paycheck, and THAT is bad for the baby. Lying around like a sloth all day is bad for the baby. Bringing up the woman who ran a marathon at, what was it, eight or nine months pregnant? That might be a good motivator. We aren't the women of Jane Austen stories anymore, we can do this shit.

Quote
satansbitch

Quote
lilin_unite

Quote
satansbitch
I say get rid of her. She will only get worse with time. Do you honestly want to hear inpig tripe ON TOP OF doing her work for eight months or longer???

With her position, she doesn't have a chance to prove herself immediately. Next time she does, I'll be watching, with two informed back-ups at the ready.

I warned her. She gets a shot to fix it.

You're a kinder human being than I am. I would be emptying shaving cream cans into her purse and stinking up her work space with Liquid Ass until she quit in tears.

larious

YESSSSSSS.

Lilin, I know how you feel about being irritated. There are 3 women in my office who are "you know". eyes2 Sigh... I keep my distance. Two of them are actually nice but when they start talking about the "thing" they glaze over...it's a little scary, I just want to run away. The third is a horrid creature who should be fired but she's friends with some of the people in charge. She's flaky, irresponsible, manic- depressive, yikes, this woman should not be a mawm!

How can she stand up to the demands of moohood when she can't even handle being knocked up with the thing?

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
So.. We know that food and water are running out, with overpopulation and all... Yet people keep on poppin' out those babies! I guess they want to have their baby and eat it too...

My top reason is that parenting gives you a free license to be selfish based purely on the fact that you're being selfish for an emanation of your own self. The illusion that what you do to benefit your children benefits them solely is a fallacy. Every parent benefits from the benefits that their children receive. Henceforth, it gives one a license to perpetuate a dog-eat-dog mentality that I perceive to be amoral. Parents say that their children are their greatest loves, what they forget to add is that they are their ONLY loves and only because their children are a reflection of themselves. I prefer to be able to love multiple people and have lasting relationships of many types and possess the essential core value of empathy for all than to restrict myself to an echo chamber of ego-masturbation and self-serving chicanery.

In short: Not parenting makes you a better person.

Most employment contracts are "at will" which means you can be let go any time, for any reason.

This means you don't even need a reason.

The week deadline is fine; there are plenty of hungry, talented people waiting to take her place out there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

Quote
catharsist
How can she stand up to the demands of moohood when she can't even handle being knocked up with the thing?

This was my question as well. If you can't even handle going to work, how the fuck are you going to handle a loaf that doesn't care how you're feeling when it needs to get to the hospital, or be changed/fed/etc?

You can't just tell it you don't feel like it, unless you want CPS at your door, but at that point, why not just abort now and save yourself all the scars and misery?

Just an update: Whining cow is gone.

She was just so full of excuses for why she can't do her job or bother to even get in touch because she's a special inpig snowflake. She can take her special snowflake ass through that special snowflake door and into the special snowflake unemployment line, then.

So that's that, I guess.

Well, that didn't take too long, did it? eyes2

I've encountered no less than a dozen newly-inpig coworkers in my working years who've used pignasty related excuses to either get out of work duties entirely or leave early. Many of them are lying through their teeth about doctor's appointments and the like just so they can leave a few hours before the end of their shift. One of my former coworkers is a PNB and I asked her if the irritating inpig co-irker we dealt with at the time would possibly need to go to the doctor 3 times per week ("I can't stay until x time because I have a doctor's appointment."), and she said absolutely not unless something is going extremely wrong, and certainly not so early in the pignancy. Lying bitch didn't last long because of her attendance issues.

Quote
cosmictraveler
One of my former coworkers is a PNB and I asked her if the irritating inpig co-irker we dealt with at the time would possibly need to go to the doctor 3 times per week ("I can't stay until x time because I have a doctor's appointment."), and she said absolutely not unless something is going extremely wrong, and certainly not so early in the pignancy.

I used to work with someone who would pull a similar stunt. She claimed that every Friday afternoon she had to take her son (who was less than a year old) to doctor's appointments. She was on "flex time" so would claim that she made up the time on the weekends - yeah, right. When flex time was revoked, suddenly her kid didn't need all of those appointments.