Pity? Sorry, no pity there.

I have been a member of a site for a few months. A friend invited me and I made an account. She left but I stayed because I found some groups I like.
Some duh sent me a message almost everyday bothering me to talk.
He was all flatter and I was all ok. Came to me about some story of being divorced on not able to see his kids when he loves them so much.
He asked me about family. First sibling, then kids.
It went like this:

"Do you have kids?"

"I don't want any."

"Why?"

"I don't like children."

"But right now or never?"

"Never. I'm not fond of children."

"Oh... Pity."

"Why?"

"I don't know. I have two kids and they're the best of my life..."

"I don't see how that's a pity for me. You want them you have them. I don't want them, nor have them. No pity there."

"Hahaha true..."

"Just logic."

How the fuck is that a pity for me?! I don't want them nor have them and somehow that's a pity? LOL
I bet he's thinking we'll end up having some kind of sex talk.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Don't you know how to deal with children?!"
"I don't like animals who act on instinct."
I think you're on to something Akihiko.

Ugh, you have my sympathies milenascarlet. I had to leave some sites due to the excessive breeder-pleasing and other breeder-related issues that were driving me up the wall.

People who say that they feel pity on the childfree just shows them how they can't think outside of the box.

If it wasn't for the groups I'd already left. The people there are nice and hilarious. I hope to finish getting their contacts soon.
I'd let the question slide but the pity reply was annoying. Pity? It's like he KNOWS I'd make the #1 mom or something. EW!
I bet he thought he'd hook up with a young CF chick. Duh, not interested and not available.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Don't you know how to deal with children?!"
"I don't like animals who act on instinct."
I think you're on to something Akihiko.

People just don't know manners.

If someone has plans that I have no interest in or find hard to empathize with, I'll pull out a stock phrase:
"I hope that works out for you.."
"Best wishes on that .."
"It's not something that interests me, but I hope you find the endeavor enjoyable ..."

"Pity" is a judgement word. At the least, it's rude to say. If the person doesn't realize the gaffe they've made and continues the conversation in the same vein, they deserve whatever rude cutoff you choose to deploy.

You just blew her limited breeder mind and she didn't know what to say. This is merely one step up from going blah-ba-ba and drooling :drool probably a lot like her loaf. I mean "they are the best of my life?? The best what, waste of time and money, best way to ruin your dreams. Just consider the source.

Quote
milenascarlet
If it wasn't for the groups I'd already left. The people there are nice and hilarious. I hope to finish getting their contacts soon.
I'd let the question slide but the pity reply was annoying. Pity? It's like he KNOWS I'd make the #1 mom or something. EW!
I bet he thought he'd hook up with a young CF chick. Duh, not interested and not available.

Duhs put themselves up on a very high pedestal. They feel that because some woman/women decided to breed with them, then every other woman is going to want them because other women did. They give themselves a 10 where they deserve a 2.

They often throw around the idea that "kids are the best thing that ever happened", then why are these duhs are always trying to hook up with someone? Hint: they are in a deep sorrow over their choice. They are pathetic and they know it. They sit there and wish that only if they would have just "pulled out a second earlier" or did not give into the pressure of their nagging bitch of an ex. But like we always say here, it takes 2 to tango. More often than not, one moron loser deserves the other. Trash finds trash. Water seeks its own level.

If someone wants to breed - fine. Don't try to convince others to do the same. Or, make step parents out of them. Fuck you single duhs, clean up your own mess, that kind that you should have left inside of a condom.

Techie, that last paragraph says exactly what I feel. You nailed it.

Dorisan, I also found it very rude. I'd have a little bit of respect for him if he kept his opinion to himself instead of making that remark. He can go pity his own sorry ass. I was kind of surprised he did say "Is the guy you're seeing ok with that? Lots of men want babies!" I had a reply ready for that.
It felt good to defend my choice. I think I'll soon start to be more vocal about it.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Don't you know how to deal with children?!"
"I don't like animals who act on instinct."
I think you're on to something Akihiko.

The only "pity" to be had is for himself as he suddenly realised he had zero chance with you!
As usual, breeders are incapable of imagining anything from a point if view that is not their own.

Would this person want that kind of response to something important in their life?

"I have two kids and it's awesome!"
"Oh...pity..." (something I might think, but generally don't say. I have some tact when needed. )

Or to lay the judgment even more bare, remove procreation from the context completely:

"I'm taking a forensic anthropology class and it's SO cool."
"Oh... Pity."

"I just closed on that house that I've been wanting, and I got it for under budget!"
"Oh...Pity."

Removing procreation shows exactly how much judgment oozes thru.

Quote
aliceblue
You just blew her limited breeder mind and she didn't know what to say. This is merely one step up from going blah-ba-ba and drooling :drool probably a lot like her loaf. I mean "they are the best of my life?? The best what, waste of time and money, best way to ruin your dreams. Just consider the source.

Alice-

It was a Duh, not a Moo, that scarlet was talking to.

~~~~~~~~~~~
I miss my little feather baby.

Quote
milenascarlet
Lots of men want babies!"

None of the right men want babies.

Quote
barbur

Quote
milenascarlet
Lots of men want babies!"

None of the right men want babies.

Damn straight!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Don't you know how to deal with children?!"
"I don't like animals who act on instinct."
I think you're on to something Akihiko.

Quote
milenascarlet

Quote
barbur

Quote
milenascarlet
Lots of men want babies!"

None of the right men want babies.

Damn straight!

This should be the rule of thumb for all CF people. Breeders always try to beat down CF folks into step parenting or worse yet, breeding. ANY breeder oriented bingo towards a CF person should be welcomed with a steel toed boot.