Breeder Histrionics 101

One of my neighbors across the street is the most annoying subspecies known as the single martyred moo. She locked on to me, and tries clinging to me like some sort of resistant fungal infection. Despite being told several times to leave me alone, and in not such pleasant language, she is of the opinion that since I have a vagina I must naturally be her best friend. She is prone to histrionics, and no whether something is good or bad, it is a major event in her life. She is a boring, whiny dipshit and I wish she would just move already.

Two weeks ago, her toilet backed up after her butt-ugly little four-year-old fuckstain threw a stuffed animal into it. Instead of pulling the thing out and plunging or snaking the toilet, the bitch wanders over to me and acts like Noah should be building the arc and we should all be headed for high ground.

Last week, her two-year-old had a slight temperature of 100 degrees, and she was literally hysterical, acting like her brat had galloping malaria with a dengue fever chaser. I told her to give the brat some Tylenol, and then its temperature went down. Of course, her reaction was overblown. It was like an old movie where the dogsledders had brought the serum into the Inuit Village to save the young child from the dangerous fever. This bitch must see too many old movies.

Today really took the award for worst performance for a emotionally disturbed moo. Her brat had a paper cut from a coloring book and she brought the brat over to me and asked if I could call the ambulance because it was bleeding. The brat had a confused look on its face and asked me for a BandAid. I put the bandage on the brat and sent her home. I also told her never to come back to my house because she is unwelcome, and in turn got her crying excuse that I was a nurse and she was so happy to have me as her neighbor.

I laid down the law on her ass and told her that if she shows up again, I will have a restraining order filed against her. "But you're a nurse and a woman! How can you do this to me?" says she. Says me, "I am not your friend and I am not your confidant. GET OUT AND STAY OUT!!" So she ran crying out of my house and already told her next door neighbor Bill, an older gentleman who despises her, that I am "mean". Bill choked with laughter when he told me that he told her that I was not mean, but that she was a crazy bitch. He also told me that her ex sold the house out from under her and now she has to move at the end of November. It is going to be a long month.

CFBitchfromLA Wrote:
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> she is of the opinion that since I have a vagina I must
> naturally be her best friend.

Oh gawd, I hate that! I hate being made to feel like I have to love and side with all women just because I am one - even the skankiest losers who give us ALL a bad name!

Patience, CFBitchfromLA, and good luck - less than 4 weeks to go! She sounds like a total nightmare.

""But you're a nurse and a woman! How can you do this to me?""

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Holy Fuck. My across the hall neighbor is also a nurse, but I didn't beat down her door when I found DH in the middle of a gran mal seizure (thanks, Lexapro) at 4:30 in the morning. I called the ambulance and had them take him to the hospital. What NERVE of some people!

I guess the drama queen psycho moo doesn't realize that nurses don't work for free, and that she's not your employer? Next time she comes over with a ridiculous medical emergency, tell her you will charge her your hourly rate.

Thank god she's moving out, eh?

I get this kind of shit all of the time in our condo building in Seattle.

Some homeowner will forget to have their prescription renewed or have som miscellaneous ache or pain, and they show up on my door expecting free care. I am bound by legal and ethical responsibility and duty to render acute care in case of life-threatening emergency, but forgetting to have your birth control pills or sleeping agent refilled does not quite rise to this level.

Showing up at my door does not constitute a proper physician:patient relationship to me personally or to the law. I would be hard pressed to justify to licensure authorities the issuance of a prescription based on a five second encounter in the lobby, though that is what some homeowners expect of me. Wrong.

What a drag and an imposition! May I ask why you keep answering the door when she comes over? Call me passive-aggressive, but if someone I don't want to talk to/see calls me or comes over, I ignore the call or the door. Good luck with the rest of the month...you should throw a neighborhood party the day the moo moves out!

We lived next door to the stupidest fucking moo on the planet before we bought our house. She thought we were there to serve her skanky ass, and would always ask to 'borrow' things. Her brats were always at our front door, asking us to buy that useless and overpriced shit for their school activities, and we always had to chase the little spermlings away.

Once, while we carrying in our groceries, she tried to 'borrow' a gallon of milk and a dozen eggs and as she tried to reach them out of our car trunk, my wife took her aside and said something to her. I never knew what she said, but it must have been a real doozie. The moo immediately put back the stuff back and ran every time she saw DW. Though I never really thought about it, knowing DW, I am sure it involved a negative outcome with the stupid bint's skull and a large, blunt object that might have been wielded by my wife.

I was never go glad to move away in my life.