Where do you meet men that date single moms?

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CircleOfMoms

Leigh says:

Ok so after years of partying it up at bars and clubs I've settled down and enjoy building snow forts and kite flying. My question is where or how do you meet men that date single moms? I REALLY don't want to go the online dating path but after 4 years I don't seem to be meeting anyone at the playground or the library. I have a strong group of friends but they are 10-30 years my senior and most are unhappily married. Come on girls.. you know who you are.. you found that awesome catch... where did it happen...how did it happen?

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CircleOfMoms
Shalini says:
Im a single mom with a son aged 4 im confident lookgood and past 4yrs after my 1st relatioship its realky horrible I cant seem to find the one to lean my head on and everyone I turn to is only ready to use me at situation im ready for that I will only be giving myself to the one I marry, ive no friends and relatives as they regard me as a dirt bag due to my past...

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Mike
I am a single dad looking to talk to a nice single mom. Does anyone feel interested?

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Peace
Except for a young widow with a kid, I can't feel sorry for these women. They partied it up, fucked anything with a dick, got knocked up, and are now bemoaning their fate...

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Techie
"When will some single moms understand that most men, Child-Free and otherwise, would rather not date them."

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Peace
Why would any CF man worth his salt want to put up with a single moo? Who needs the drama, the stress, the financial drain? When I was single, I wanted a CF man who did not have debt, no baggage, well educated. Why would I want to put up with a single duh and all of his problems? Plus, I am CF. If I didn't want to birth my own loaves, why on earth would I want to put up with a man's jizz fruit?

These single moos need to realize that a man without his own kids won't want to put up with a woman who birthed her own. It's that simple.

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evilchildlessbitch
Can we please do away with the most men are pedophiles crap.
Mens rooms aren't full of pervs.
Every man dating a single mom isn't a perv.
Most children are not abused by moos boy toy. They are abused by family members and non romantic friends.
Sorry, but it irks me to see silly myths spread.

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evilchildlessbitch
Can we please do away with the most men are pedophiles crap.
Mens rooms aren't full of pervs.
Every man dating a single mom isn't a perv.
Most children are not abused by moos boy toy. They are abused by family members and non romantic friends.
Sorry, but it irks me to see silly myths spread.

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I've been divorced almost 2 years after marrying my college sweetheart and being with him for 11 years. So, I had to figure out how to date in my 30's as a single mom with joint custody of toddlers.

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Online dating is absolutely the way to go. I met a man this summer on OKCupid who will be hubby #2 - he's an amazing single father, we have SO much in common, and our kids adore each other.

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Ketchup

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I've been divorced almost 2 years after marrying my college sweetheart and being with him for 11 years. So, I had to figure out how to date in my 30's as a single mom with joint custody of toddlers.

Sounds like the marriage took a hit after the baybees came along. Toddlers are what, 2-4 years old age range? And she's been divorced two years, which doesn't count the time the marriage was still legally intact but failing. But there's more from this one -

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Online dating is absolutely the way to go. I met a man this summer on OKCupid who will be hubby #2 - he's an amazing single father, we have SO much in common, and our kids adore each other.

I can't EVEN imagine. I mean, maybe it's just me, but it sounds like she's committing to this guy awfully quickly after the divorce. Ugh, dating as a breeder sounds like a living nightmare. I can't imagine having to deal with the blended famblee logistics.

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evilchildlessbitch
Can we please do away with the most men are pedophiles crap.
Mens rooms aren't full of pervs.
.

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Techie
He is a single Duh. 2 breeders put together and try to duplicate a Brady bunch. It is just things are not as easy in real life - breeder relationships require way more work. Are breeders willing to work hard? Humor me not

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thom_c

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evilchildlessbitch
Can we please do away with the most men are pedophiles crap.
Mens rooms aren't full of pervs.
.

You only need to worry if there's a senator in there

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bookworm
Love how all the completely unsolicited "Message/call me at xxxxxxx" are popping up on that thread. Including one from Ghana. That could end well...

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randomcfchick
When will these single parents figure out that they really should just date each other?? An overwhelming majority of CF people will not even consider childed partners, and a LOT of childless people don't wanna raise other people's kids.

Seriously. If they expect someone else to give their kids a chance, they should give someone else's kids that same chance.

Hypocrites.

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I know so many guys that are in their late twenties or early thirties that don't want to date single moms if they have never had kids. Is this because they want kids or their own or just don't want to be burdened with someone else's child?

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pizzaroll
honestly, they don't want to be burdered with kids that aren't their own. you never know what kind of mess that might be. the biological father could be a lunatic still controlling his ex and kids, he could be a delinquent dad behind on support, she could still be in love with him, etc....

and for a single never been married guy, or even divorced guy with no kids, why would they want to place themselves in that situation? ONLY if the lady is HOT, RICH and/or YOUNG does he want anything to do with her. single moms usually don't fall into any let alone one of these categories. sorry to be so blunt. but there are 100 ladies for every 88 men. we don't have to settle if we don't have kids ourselves...

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calicalendar16
Hmm not sure. frankly I can't blame "a lot of guys" as it is a burden to take on someone else's children. I don't think it's that they don't ever want kids, but it's just that... they want kids that are not their own. It's not to say there aren't guys that would take on your child as their own, just a more select few. Truth be told, and don't take offense as I battle with accepting the reality of life as well (versus what I think it should be), but a lot of guys in their late twenties or early thirties... want a hot little 24 year old not a burdened 26-28 year old. Seriously no offense, a friend and I were talking the other day and don't think we look bad for 30, we still get carded for smokes for my yard guy and definitely for alcohol... but at the end of the day there is something "unfun" about a girl with responsibility... and know we wouldn't stand a chance in the bar scene. Not b/c we are crazy, not b/c we let ourselves go, but b/c guys get older and every year there is a new crop of 18 year olds.

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Here are the top 10 reasons men shy away from serious involvements with single mothers:

(1) You Just Can’t Get Away. You are tied down and can’t just scamper off for spur-of-the-moment romantic dinners, spontaneous plays or concerts, or midnight breakfasts. Spur-of-the-moment overnight get-aways are out of the question. You have to get a babysitter. You have to make plans in advance. And if you can’t find a sitter, or your budget won’t allow you to hire one, his desire for a romantic evening or weekend with you goes up in a puff of disappointed smoke.

(2) You Have Children by Numerous Guys. Most guys accept the fact that our society has changed and that divorce, long-term cohabitation, and just plain carelessness means that there are many women with children in the dating pool. Dealing with one guy about his child or children is usually not much of a problem. However, the chances of “baby daddy drama” increase substantially the more personalities there are involved in the new relationship. Men may stick around for awhile for the convenience such a relationship offers, but few are looking to “wife up” a woman that has that much baggage.

(3) Your Children Are Too Old. Tim is a 33 year old computer technician in San Jose. He won’t date a woman that has children over the age of 8. Tim drew the line after he got hit with that “I don’t have to listen to you ’cause you ain’t my daddy anyway” line one time too many. He acknowledges that many women make the mistake of telling their young sons that they are “the man of the house,” something the young boy may take great pride in. The son will thus challenge any contender to the throne and his power in the household. So for Tim, unless the children are relatively young, he doesn’t want to be bothered.

(4) Your Children Are Too Young. At the other end of the spectrum are men that are run off by a child that is TOO young, like nursery or preschool age. Small children are very Mommy-oriented and require a lot of assistance with everything from bathing to eating. They also require constant watchful attention for their own protection and safety. A man that feels he comes in a distant second to your children may not be so thrilled with the situation and choose instead to date a woman that has more time and energy to expend on him.

(5) “Are You My New Daddy?” Smart men know that little children get easily attached to people they have fun with. But guys don’t want to deal with that emotional quagmire. Should he decide that you two aren’t quite right for each other, he is afraid of breaking your innocent child’s heart. Many men therefore shy away from heavy involvements with single mothers, and put up roadblocks or shy away from meeting or spending any time with a single Moms children.

(6) He’s a Lover, Not a Fighter. Realistically,after a breakup or divorce, children are usually pretty negative about some new person coming into Mommy or Daddy’s life. It ruins their fantasy of the parents getting back together. They may even feel that this new guy is “taking you away” and lash out, behaving in a manner so rude and horrible that you are embarrassed to be his or her mother! Your new beau is not so attached to you yet that he wants to put the energy into developing a relationship with any child who sees him as the enemy.

.................

9) Your Little Darlings Are Devils on Wheels. One of the top reasons men gave for not wanting to date single Moms involves his stance on discipline. “There is an apparent role reversal and the children tell the MOTHER what to do… these women have no controbratty spoiled children can ruin a potential romance for single momsl over their children!” exclaimed Darius, a 35 year old high school math teacher. He says that if he doesn’t like how they are talking to her, he pulls her aside to see if she can correct the problem. Knowing “his place” most men, just like Darius, won’t say anything, but they are watching to see how you handle your children and inappropriate behavior. When Moms allow their children to run wild, talk back, or use foul language, Darius quickly moves on.

(10) Mom Demonstrates Resentment Towards HIS Children Several men I spoke with have children from previous marriages or relationships themselves, and have close contact with their children, over and above that dictated by child custody and visitation orders. They all reported at one time or another dating a woman with children of her own that expressed resentment that they did more with and for their own children than they did with and for hers. These extremely family oriented and very loving men abandoned these budding relationships without looking back.