Is it child abuse to give your kid a stupid name?

http://www.sheknows.com/parenting/articles/1123281/crazy-baby-name-spelling

In this case it might be. This totally insane moo named her baby Kaitlyn, but substituted the roman numeral 8 for the middle part of the name. Just imagine all the difficulties this poor kid is going to face her whole life. I can tell you from experience many people are confused by a name that is even slightly uncommon, but perfectly normal. Nobody will understand this disaster of a name.

My favorite comment is one of the ones by "Donna". She says kids don't want to be seen as an oddball by their peers, they want to fit in.The only time it is an advantage to be the only kid with something is if that something is coveted by the other kids.
I totally agree and I think far to many parents are insensitive to this fact.

Literally a 'kre8ive' name...

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ouabain
Literally a 'kre8ive' name...

More like a 'kreVIIIive' name.

Further proof that breeders don't understand the fact that babies and children grow up and become adults. A name is what somebody will have for the next 80+ years, to use in both their personal and professional lives, to be put on résumés, business cards, and official documents. And it is not cheap or easy to go and change your name if it's not due to marriage. What they think is cute now during the stage of life where a name doesn't yet affect a child is not so cute when the kid is getting teased by their classmates, patronized by teachers and school administration, their job/college applications ending up in the trash, etc.

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"Bitch wants a baby, so we're gonna fuck now. #bareback"
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Oh whatever. Abortion doctors are crimestoppers."
- Miss Hannigan

I saw something about this on Facebook, but there was no context to it, so I had no idea about the Roman numeral crap. I thought it was just a dumbass name pronounced like "Kha-vill-enn." I'm sure Mommy thinks she's being so creative with her "unique" name idea. Yeah, "KVIIIlyn" is fine for a password, not the name of a human being who will want to one day have a job.

Giving your kid a dumbass name might not exactly be abusive, but it will leave the kid totally open to ridicule from their peers in school (we all know how cruel kids can be to one another), will damn her to a life of having to constantly spell her name to people, many of whom will assume she's joking and her "name" will probably keep a lot of employers from taking her seriously. Maybe it's not abuse in the same vein as beating your kid to a pulp every single day, but it's automatically and unnecessarily making the kid's life much more difficult. There's nothing wrong with the name "Kaitlyn" - it's a normal name that people can spell and say. Why not just spell the fucking thing the typical EARTH way instead of trying to get all creative? If you want to try and express yourself, don't do it in a way that will affect someone else who has no say in the matter.

If parents can't be trusted to even give their kids real names, then who knows what other poor judgment they'll exercise in regard to their children's lives.

This is stupid. Google tells me octo is the spoken equivalent of VIII. She named her kid "Koctolyn". I don't see anything wrong with the traditional spelling of Kaitlyn, but if she HAD to add in a number, why not "Keightlyn?" VIII is only "eight" to English speakers, if this kid travels anywhere outside the U.S besides Australia, Great Britain, or South Africa, she's going to be bullied even more.

Lock him up or put him down.
Stolen from Shiny.

If I was in charge of HR, KVIIIlyn would never, ever, ever be hired. Ever.

1. Her name would inevitably be screwed up on official documents, interoffice mail, salary and benefits packets, you name it. And it would happen repeatedly. And this would be a waste of time for all parties involved.

2. More importantly, people who have these names weren't just named that way by chance. There is a purpose behind that name, and it reflects upon her parents and their attitudes toward raising her. Obviously, KVIIIlyn's parents believe that she is a special snowflake, a unique flower for all of us to admire. Just look at her unique sneauxphlayque name! I believe the odds are significantly increased that she'll be uncoachable, untrainable, unmanageable, and ultimately unemployable.

Companies need employees who are dependable, ambitious, and creative. They don't need people who think they're creative because they've been told that they are due to unrelated factors, such as their dumb names.

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Cambion

If parents can't be trusted to even give their kids real names, then who knows what other poor judgment they'll exercise in regard to their children's lives.

And that's a great point. We don't allow parents to legally buy beer and cigarettes for their kids. They aren't allowed to bring them to topless bars. They can't get them tattooed. And they shouldn't be permitted to name them in such a way that will inevitably limit their chance for success in life.

That being said--I don't know how we would craft a law to prohibit a particular name, because what's acceptable as a name falls into a very vague, gray area.

Maybe the answer is to require all young people to "register" their legal name when they reach the age of majority, which is 18 in the US. If you want to keep a nonsensical or unintelligible name, knowing that it's going to inevitably screw up a bunch of legal documents and significantly lessen your chances of employment in a number of fields, that's your decision as a grown adult. If you have any brain whatsoever and want to change your name to something that makes more sense for a dignified adult, this is your one chance to do it, free of charge... and BEFORE your name appears on government documents like a drivers license, passport, tax statement, etc.

Meh. It says a lot more about the stupid parent than it does the child. Parents like this are not to be trusted and have a severe need for attention. And possibly a personality disorder. Ugh.

I changed the spelling of my name in the 6th grade and still use the same spelling to this day, so the kid is not stuck for life with the r3t@rd3d n@m3.

I have a very common first name and a very uncommon, unique Americanized Slavic last name. My last names makes me feel like a special czeau-phlayque.

I would only worry about unique names if your last name is Johnson, Smith, or any -son surnames. Having a common first and last name can cause a lot of issues, but I'm not saying go N'B soupar kray8tv.

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paragon schnitzophonic
Further proof that breeders don't understand the fact that babies and children grow up and become adults. A name is what somebody will have for the next 80+ years, to use in both their personal and professional lives, to be put on résumés, business cards, and official documents. And it is not cheap or easy to go and change your name if it's not due to marriage. What they think is cute now during the stage of life where a name doesn't yet affect a child is not so cute when the kid is getting teased by their classmates, patronized by teachers and school administration, their job/college applications ending up in the trash, etc.

It's a shame we don't have a solution to this problem of wanting an affectionate name for use by family and friends which is different from the name on your official documents. It would be such a revolutionary idea, this 'nick-name'.

Following Beyonce's lead in baby naming. Her kid is named Blu 4 Carter.

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From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
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I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

I'm betting the parents (the mothers in this case) don't seem to have an adult's understanding of 'child' or 'baby,' or they wouldn't be giving them these stupid names, ones that sound like they'd come from a ditzy teenager or child for a pet they can show off. It's why I'm wondering if there shouldn't be a national registry of names like they have in some countries, so the child doesn't get saddled with a retarded name they might have to drag around for the rest of it's life.

A great many countries have restrictions on baby names: France, Germany, Italy, New Zealand, the Scandinavian countries, many South American countries, and Japan, and these aren't all. Some go so far as to require parents to pick from a list of approved names without modifying spellings.

In the US studies have shown that given two job applications with the same credentials—one from a person with a kre8ive name, the other from one with a normal name—employers are far more likely to throw in the trash the application from the one with the kre8ive name.

Your right to name your child should stop when the name is going to cause problems for that child in the real world. The US should fall into line with these other countries who have individual children's long-term welfare in mind: we, too, should have limits on names. To answer the question, yes, funky names are child abuse.

Kaitlyn 8 Spaghetti!

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contemplativeintrovert
This is stupid. Google tells me octo is the spoken equivalent of VIII. She named her kid "Koctolyn". I don't see anything wrong with the traditional spelling of Kaitlyn, but if she HAD to add in a number, why not "Keightlyn?" VIII is only "eight" to English speakers, if this kid travels anywhere outside the U.S besides Australia, Great Britain, or South Africa, she's going to be bullied even more.

There's an octomom snark in here somewhere

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“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.”

It's bad enough having a normal spelled name in one country, while living in another. My name is spelled with a southern European influence, that is always misspelled when spelled in proper English. It's even worse when spelling my surname, as it has an apostrophe and a second capital letter. You can imagine the mangling and mispronunciation with it that occurs all the time. It was absolutely horrendous growing up with a clearly ethnic name, and the other kids were merciless. I can't imagine the torment these half-witted names are going to inflict on these poor kids.

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kman
A great many countries have restrictions on baby names: France, Germany, Italy, New Zealand, the Scandinavian countries, many South American countries, and Japan, and these aren't all. Some go so far as to require parents to pick from a list of approved names without modifying spellings.

We have a list of approved names here in Hungary. Parents still manage to come up with the stupidest names (and first name / last name combinations) one can imagine. If the US had a list of approved names with Rose included on it, parents with the last name Garden would choose it. The government can't save people from their own stupidity.

@tea_princess

You're Hungarian too? That's cool. I didn't know they had a list of names in Hungary. This could still be a problem though if the kid moves. I'm Hungarian by birth but haven't been back in a while. I have had some interesting pronunciations of my name in the U.S

Lock him up or put him down.
Stolen from Shiny.

Looking back at my Eastern European background...

My mother's name translates to "Europe".
My aunt's name translates to "Sunday".
My other aunt's name translates to "Silver".
Yet another aunt was named after a mythical figure.

And these are still by far less ridiculous than Braelynn or Jaxson or whatever speshul psneuflayke hybrid "names" these breeding idiots probably conceived as haphazardly as their babies.

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tea princess

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kman
A great many countries have restrictions on baby names: France, Germany, Italy, New Zealand, the Scandinavian countries, many South American countries, and Japan, and these aren't all. Some go so far as to require parents to pick from a list of approved names without modifying spellings.

We have a list of approved names here in Hungary. Parents still manage to come up with the stupidest names (and first name / last name combinations) one can imagine. If the US had a list of approved names with Rose included on it, parents with the last name Garden would choose it. The government can't save people from their own stupidity.

Yup! I actually had a teacher whose maiden name was Holly Christmas. She said her parents "knew" she would get a new last name when getting married so it was for their amusement while she was a minor.
So many assumptions! What if she never married??? What if she needed to get her professional name out there before marriage? What if she didn't take her husband's name at all???
I don't even remember what the class was now, but she used her own name issues to have lots of conversations with us about contemporary customs vs. customs of only one and two generations ago.

http://www.today.com/id/34641678/ns/today-today_news/t/marijuana-pepsi-will-see-you-now/

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“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.”

I'm sure by the time she's a teen she'll start writing her name the sane way aside from more strict documents. If she's smart she'll start it in grade school after the first initial teasing.