Encounter with crazy breeder

A while ago i wrote here about a woman that i had to help with her studies, much like a tutor. She kind of pissed me off because she was always finding excuses not to do her assignements like "i have a chiiiiiild, i don't have time to write essays". We didn't keep in touch anymore since then but now we met by chance and she invited me at her place.

Everything was going well, we talked about what have we been up to and i mentioned that i just finished my studies. She asked me what i'm going to do next and i explained that i have a job now and maybe i'm going to study something more challenging.

Then she started saying how my life really needs a challenge and having kids is the best challenge i can take. She continued for about a freakin' half an hour (!!!) how kids are the best and i have to hurry up because my time expires (WTF?), what is my husband and my parents think about it, i say that i don't want kids now but there is a deep desire inside me and i just need somebody to dig it up - basically i want kids, i just don't know it yet. She called me and DH irresponsible, lazy and selfish (towards society), although she never met my husband. Then she offered to take me to a friend who suffered from infertility and had a kid after lots of treatments, maybe this woman can help me. I need to give a kid to my husband and complicate his life a little (WTF again), i'll get more friends if i have kids, and all this studying and learning is in vain anyways if i don't have kids.

I did ask her why does she care so much what i do with my life and why is she so desperate that i should have kids. She completely avoided the answer and said: "have kids and you will see". I ended the conversation there and mentioned that if she continues i'm walking straight out of the door.

Did you know what she said after all these insults: "Oh come on! Don't get mad, i was just joking!" She stopped, fortunately, but how can somebody be joking after insulting me for about half an hour? I don't think she is in her right mind.

I don't mean to sound like I am telling you what to do, but having a negative experience with a breeder it is not a great idea to go over to their place in the future. Again, not telling you what to do. Also breeders believe EVERYBODY has baybee desires WAY down in their psyche somewhere. This woman sounds on the mental side.

I always *love* it when they offend you and then try to downplay it.

doesn't pay to pay a visit to a bingo breeder brain. I know, curiosity if she's 'improved'. nothing ever will improve them.

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.

The insult, hidden barb, obvious barb, slander, veiled insult, (fill in the blank) followed by the old get out of jail free card of asshole redemption: I'm just kidding/joking!

Hidden meaning: I can tell I pissed you off by being an utter asshole but now I'm turning the tables on you because...tee hee...kidding! So, now you're the asshole/sensitive/mad one for taking it personally even though I was addressing you personally as you're the only one around! And I'm smiling so that means I'm nice and friendly, despite the many insults I've peppered you with. Because I'm smiling I'm a good person! As long as I'm smiling I can spout off blatantly sociopathic statements and you can't do anything about it...because I'm just joking...tee hee.

Truth is: the people who play these games are ALWAYS ASSHOLES, passive aggressive, lack any social graces and are tragically insecure. This moo is seethingly jealous of you.

If you want to counterattack beat her at her own game you've got a bunch of options, including:

Smile as you tell her that she does the most important job on earth, and on and on with the moo worshipping and after you've laid it on as thick as you can then look her in the eye and say I'm just kidding wouldn't trade you places for anything in the world!!!

Or agree with her as she insults you with a big smile on your face because nothing will piss an asshole moo more than not being able to get a reaction out of you then say I'm just kidding!!

Or complain about the amount of free time you have, sleeping in, peaceful vacations, etc. as a childfree woman. Lay it on thick and then say I'm just kidding, all that stuff will surely get really old one day...tee hee!!!

And so on...if nothing else just be aware of the fact that she is soooo jealous of you and your life so you have the last laugh...tee hee!!

"I'm just kidding?" That crap. If the dopey woman had made one, maybe two snide remarks she could paper over it with an "I was only joking" backpedal. But to go on and on for 30 minutes is NOT a joking matter any more.

she's in a hell of her own making and is jealous that you have actual goals for yourself that don't involve diapers and spongebob square pants.

black pearl, you are much more patient than me; i would have told her to go fuck herself with a sippy cup and left.

I'm too patient and too polite hence these situations i find myself in from time to time. I really hate the "i was just joking" thing because it gives others the freedom to insult you in any way they please and then get out of the situation with a clean face just by saying "i was just joking". It happened with other people, too not only with breeders.

This woman's son is already 8 years old and way beyond the diaper stage but she is complaining all the time how hard it is and how hellish were the first years. And then preaching how it's all worth it . Everything that came out of her mouth was only cliches and although i tried to change the subject by completely ignoring her, she was coming back and pushing the issue.

Actually is quite fun to hear such a breeder talking and try to ask her what's the reasoning beyond her words.

For example, i asked towards whom i am selfish and she said towards society because i am refusing to do my primordial role and contribute. I said i'm contributing by working and volunteering unlike her who has been unemployed for ages and lives on the taxpayers' money and ex-husband's child support. She is complaining how hard it is with a kid but then tells me it's all worth it and it basically makes no sense, why am i irresponsible and lazy as i finished two master degrees, last one while working two jobs. I asked how can she know what i want after seeing me just few times.

Guess what? She didn't give me any logical answer, she started reapeating all the bingoes all over again and use emotional arguments (argumentum ad passiones). I tried to go deeper and see what's her reasoning but i couldn't get anything clear. Yeah, i know sounds weird, but i'm really curious how these people think. I guess they don't.

the next time you see this woman you should say things like, "after i saw you the other day i was thinking what a shit parade your life has become since you had a kid, and you are stuck until he goes to college. hopefully he won't move back in with you when he's 30. that would suck, huh? kind of like how it sucks every time you leak a little when you sneeze.....JUST KIDDING!"

Her ovaries must be constantly whispering "Join usssss!" When she encounters the childfree.

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blackpearl
Then she started saying how my life really needs a challenge and having kids is the best challenge i can take.

No, she just wants to create another miserable moo to commiserate with. This is no different from the breeders who keep bleating on and on about their spawn farting rainbows and vomiting glitter. They won't openly talk about anything that would be disqualified from a Kodak moment--until some unfortunate soul who suffers an apocalyptic diaper blowout or whose precious angel morphs into a borderline homicidal teenager needs someone to whine to.

At least you--and all of us here--know what's right for us and won't compromise that.

There's no guarantee or right to going through life without being offended or hurt. People will say stuff that's insensitive or straight-up mean.

But the "you're too sensitive/I was only kidding" is often the last resort of a bully who's been called out.

Which is why THIS:

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myrna minkoff
the next time you see this woman you should say things like, "after i saw you the other day i was thinking what a shit parade your life has become since you had a kid, and you are stuck until he goes to college. hopefully he won't move back in with you when he's 30. that would suck, huh? kind of like how it sucks every time you leak a little when you sneeze.....JUST KIDDING!"

can sometimes be the BEST tactic for dealing with these types. Seriously, it's like brutish bluntness is the only language they speak, so you have to dish it back for them to get a clue and leave you and/or the topic alone.

Fortunately I have come across very few who require this tactic. Most people who say weird bingo-y shit to me just really don't think about how stupid their words are, and when I've pointed it out they get embarrassed and change topics.

Boy, she really made sure to get all the major bingoes, didn't she, though "your life needs a challenge, so you should breed" is a new one for me. Let's see, she mentioned:

• You have to hurry up before your time will expire (you're almost past your prime)
• What does your husband think (what if your husband wants a child?)
• You want kids and just don't know it yet (everyone wants kids)
• Irresponsible, lazy, selfish (having kids is the only way for a person to be a responsible, selfless adult)
• Come talk to my friend who had fertility treatments (you must not want kids because you can't have them)
• You need to give your husband a kid (your marriage is meaningless if you don't reproduce)
• You'll have more friends if you have kids (have kids because everyone else is doing it)
• Getting degrees doesn't matter if you don't have kids (the most important thing you can do with your life is reproduce)
• Have kids and you'll see (you'll love it once it gets here)

And, of course, capping it off with "Oh I was just joking, teehee" to make it sound like you're just being way too sensitive and can't take a joke, ya big stick in the mud. I'd be tempted to ask this cunt, "So let's say I have a kid that I don't want, and I don't like it. I'm gonna dump it on your doorstep, mmmkay? You sure seem to love being a mother, so in case I don't, you can raise it for me, alrighty?"

Or use my go-to answer for persistent breeders. "I can't have a child because the state keeps taking them at birth. How was I supposed to know that putting a baby in the washing machine would kill it? I put it on delicate!" Let's see what her ass has to say about that.

She, and all other rabid breeders, are like crabs in a bucket headed to Red Lobster. When they see a smarter crab escaping, they try to pull it back in.

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"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny

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Miss_Hannigan
She, and all other rabid breeders, are like crabs in a bucket headed to Red Lobster. When they see a smarter crab escaping, they try to pull it back in.

Oh..oh oh...good one!!

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blackpearl
A while ago i wrote here about a woman that i had to help with her studies, much like a tutor. She kind of pissed me off because she was always finding excuses not to do her assignements like "i have a chiiiiiild, i don't have time to write essays". We didn't keep in touch anymore since then but now we met by chance and she invited me at her place.

Here's where things went wrong: when you accepted. If she pissed you off then, chances are good she hasn't gotten better. Trust me, you can get sufficient glimpse into these people's lives on FB without subjecting yourself to them in person.

I don't get offended very easily and i often ignore mean remarks but i would call her bingoes stupidity and jealousy. The way she complains about her life, makes it clear that she isn't happy at all. And i also noticed that no matter how good my mood is, after i meet this person i get filled with anxiety. I hope i won't meet her again but it's quite difficult because we live in the same area (less than two miles).

She even had the nerve to insist that i should move with her and her son to help them pay the rent. Of course i refused but she insisted sending me text message after text message trying me to convince to move with them.

She is weird anyways, for example, this moment she says one thing, than just after few minutes she says exactly the opposite. And when you draw attention to the previous thing she said, she'll deny it "i never said that".

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blackpearl
I hope i won't meet her again but it's quite difficult because we live in the same area (less than two miles).

Cut her off. If you are inclined to be polite, when she calls, keep your answers monosyllabic and decline invitations. If not, don't answer the phone. I live about 10 miles away from my SIL, and I haven't spoken to her in 8 months or so. Some people might side with the moo and call you immature for ghosting her. If they do, simply say "you are not obligated to let toxic people stay in your life."

Lock him up or put him down.
Stolen from Shiny.

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contemplativeintrovert

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blackpearl
I hope i won't meet her again but it's quite difficult because we live in the same area (less than two miles).

Cut her off. If you are inclined to be polite, when she calls, keep your answers monosyllabic and decline invitations. If not, don't answer the phone. I live about 10 miles away from my SIL, and I haven't spoken to her in 8 months or so. Some people might side with the moo and call you immature for ghosting her. If they do, simply say "you are not obligated to let toxic people stay in your life."

I totally agree with this. Life is too short to spend your time being insulted and bingoed by idiot breeders. Just quietly disappear from her life, and you will not have to deal with her shenanigans anymore.

yup, cut her off. if she calls or texts you let her know you have no intention of keeping in touch and you would rather she not contact you. if you meet her on the street or in the grocery store and you want to be polite say "good morning" and keep walking, otherwise ignore her.

some people need to be verbally hit with a mallet before they get a clue.