Breeder Beware

Beware. Someone went to AOL and posted this website on the CF Board there. There are many, many (FAR too many) parents that post on that board because "they want to get away from kyd talk." {{ROLLS EYES}} So yes, they infiltrate our board and while most are respectful PNB's, several ARE BNP's who post all day and talk about their kyds because being a SAHMooooo is the hardest job in the world. @@

We'll be getting a lot of lurkers here and potentially a few "yabutters" becauase many of them can not leave the CF alone.

::s hello to Elyse, the queen of yabutting and moo-dom::: Bitch.

Also, they posted Mercurior's site as well.

Hey, no big deal! If it was posted on a CF site, we are bound to get at least a few new CF members. So what if a few trolls come along for the ride? If at least 1 CF person finds this board that way and is helped by it, that's all that matters.

Trolls are usually "taken care of" pretty quickly when they come here.

As our esteemed leader is prone to saying "Bring it on"

this is my comment, on the ukcf board, for those who come from the aol message board. my mum reads this board, and the ukcf.. yes my mother, and she agrees with what most of us say. she loves me, but she cant stand other peoples kids, and couldnt stand grandkids either. she has been slightly frightened to post here incase people started thinking she is a troll.


for some strange and inexplicable reason the aol cf message board, doesnt like other message boards, i thought it would be useful to talk to others about the cf world. but apparently we arent like them.. this is the major problem with the cf world, a few stupid, inconsiderate, holier than thou people, who beleive they are always right, and their board is the best on the planet.

childfree people can only make a difference if we talk to each other, to get a large voice, now we are a bunch of disparate voices, isnt it better to be together in the main policies. that children get too much in this world and the mothers of those kids as well.

why expect the world to change if you wont even consider visiting other sites, and see their beleifs.

the people who have closed minds, are the ones who are really making the world of the CF a lot harder.

so if you are from the aol board, come on speak, talk, what have you really got to lose. nothing.. speech is all we have to fight such discrimination.


we should be working together, not in cliques. not my board is better than yours, i post a lot on this because i like the people here and how they post, i post differently on the board i co run.. but arent we big enough to accept that other cf people do exist.

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I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

CFADinNYC Wrote:
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> We'll be getting a lot of lurkers here and
> potentially a few "yabutters" becauase many of
> them can not leave the CF alone.
>
> ::s hello to Elyse, the queen of yabutting
> and moo-dom::: Bitch.

This brings back memories of Back in the Day of 1999 & 2000 of the many, MANY breeder trolls on alt.support.childfree on the old Deja site. There was one moo who e-mailed me since we all had to have Deja.com addresses back then. I was not that nice back then and posted her nasty message for all to see! Oh boy...was SHE madder than a hornet when she saw that one! She claimed I had no right to post her e-mail and claimed I was a "yabbutter". Well...I sure as H*LL did not ask her to e-mail me so I say that was fair play what she got in return. Now...I try to watch the "language" even though I curse a storm in my own life.

"FUCK WORK"

does that mean we shouldnt accept new people posting CFADinNYC, because of possible trolls, if we are so scared then why have a board at all.

there is a danger of becoming too inclusive, trolls ok are generally bad, but they can stimulate us. to refine how we say we are cf, so they cant have any arguments against us.

look at the past posts with trolls, we have all stood up to them, and we have become more able to fight for the same rights as they have.

i say bring them on as well.. this division amongst the boards, whether its for silly reasons like grammar, or they dislike british people or that the number of posts means worth of a person.. doesnt do us any good in fact it makes more problems. we should be big enough, and confident enough to accept other boards, and that they may see things differently. they arent all wrong, but then again neither are we..

how can we change peoples attitudes, if we dont talk to each other. and learn from everyone else experience.

*********************************************************************************************************************************
I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

I feel sorry for people who come to trawl information from other rooms. it tells me that they have so little with which to fill their lives and minds that they go around looking to cause trouble.

Everyone is entitled to comment on their own points of view.

You have to accept that there are many sad sad individual around.

Unfortunately I met up with a whole coven of them on AOL.

Unfortunatly, the CF board on AOL is filled with breeders and moo's who insist on posting about their own ilk. Why would I want them to become cozy here? I much prefer a CF board to be CF, or at least have respectful PNB's in which you would never know they are PNB.

I always welcome more CF'ers. Always good to have another point of view. And I didn't say otherwise.

:::Waves hello to Elyse::::

BTW Giselle, there are many CF on the AOL board who are quite lovely, funny and friendly. Not sure what board youare referencing.

AOHell as a general rule tends to be loaded with breeders. I used to have AOHell, but have never seen the CF board there. But from other boards I have seen, I get the impression that it is a lot like the defunct iVillage CF board (which was moderated by a moo), and the Bella Online MNK board, which also welcomes breeders.

One board I did post on back in the day was their wedding boards, as I was planning my own wedding at the time. Of course, they had to have a forum there about breeding. After all, why get married if you're NOT going to breed, right? Just about ALL of these women said that they wanted kids ASAP after the wedding, and NO ONE dared to mention anything about being CF. And many of these women DID get knocked up before the ink was dry on the marriage certificate.

I knew that it would not be a good idea to mention anything about being CF on those boards, so I didn't. I decided to elope anyway, so I stopped reading and posting there. I had nothing in common with these women, anyway.

Anyway, if we get CF people from the AOHell boards, of course they are more than welcome. But given the breederificness of most of the AOHell message boards I have seen, we should expect to see some trolls here.

Those who are anti-CF certainly have the right to their opinion, just not on OUR boards.

This is Merc's Mum, since when has it been a rule that you like all children, I am not what you call a "child person" I like my own boys because they were brought up correctly and know how to behave, I do not like the squalling brats that I see around these days.

No one has ever said you cannot pick and choose who you like. I do not like the attitude of some young women who seem to think that by breeding unwanted brats to get more money, they are doing the right thing, they are not they are inflicting their bad mannered, objectionable children on the whole of respectable society.

I have read this site from time to time and have seen well founded comments and remarks, It appears to me that she has tunnel vision with regard to suitable Childfree sites.

I accept that everyone has a right to choose whether or not to produce children. Rowan and my son are well matched and have the same views on this which is important in a relationship. When they asked my view on their not wanting children I simply told them that it is their choice, I made my own choice and they must do likewise. I would have hated the fact they had had an unwanted child simply to please a grandparent.

Well said, Catmommy. Thank you so much.

I had to leave the AOLHell boards to find a real CF board to post on (such as this one) and I certainly don't want breeders here. I have sent this board link to CF regulars but they choose to remain there which is cool. However, most tend to be breeder pleasers which I am not a fan of.

I do hope more CFers find this site. The more the merrier.

yes thats my mum, who supports mine and rowans decision to be childfree. its only really one person who has a problem with cf boards not on aol. but i have to say this board and the one i co run have the nicest people.. we may not agree all the time on here.. but.. they were under the impression that as soon as trolls and flamers appear on this of the ukcf board, we would ban the ip address.. (not so i only banned one person who was insulting to my family)

*********************************************************************************************************************************
I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

I have read this site from time to time and have seen well founded comments and remarks, It appears to me that she has tunnel vision with regard to suitable Childfree sites.
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If this is in reference to me, you could not be more wrong. If not, please disregard.

I agree with the rest of your post. No one is disputing that. Brava.

she wasnt replying to you cfadinnyc, but to the one on the aol site.. sorry if u thought she meant you..

*********************************************************************************************************************************
I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

she wasnt replying to you cfadinnyc, but to the one on the aol site.. sorry if u thought she meant you..
___________________

No problemo!!! Just didn't want any confusion. Your mom brings up a good point though about "grandchildren on demand." I am SURE as heck happy that my own mother never made demands of "So, when am I going to be seeing grandchildren?" I wonder how many CF folks are subject to that tedious discussion.

my mum has been reading this board nearly from when it opened, but she has been nervous to post incase you all thought she was a moo. mum has said she has had her life and we are just starting on ours, and its our choice..

and you should hear what she calls some of these moos on here.. she doesnt swear really but.. the air turns blue..

*********************************************************************************************************************************
I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

mum has said she has had her life and we are just starting on ours, and its our choice..
___________________________

The words of a true and wise lady. My mom feels the same way and never pressured her 3 daughters ever into the obligatory "grand child." And guess what? She never got one! If she was dissapointed she never, ever mentioned it.

It's good to have understanding parents. I'm the last of five in my family, and there's already 11 grandkids and 8 great-grandkids; it's not like anybody's depending on me to "keep the line going." Besides, next month I'll be 41 and that's pretty late to start.

My hubby's parents, OTOH, probably wish DH and I had produced a couple of sprogs. They have only four grandkids, and all of them are adults. And one older brother is also childfree. You just never know...

Welcome, Merc's Mum....

:sw

:bal

"FUCK WORK"

mercurior Wrote:
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> my mum has been reading this board nearly from
> when it opened, but she has been nervous to post
> incase you all thought she was a moo. mum has
> said she has had her life and we are just starting
> on ours, and its our choice..

I personally have no problem with supportive PNBs posting here. It's good to get another perspective sometimes, and to know that not all parents think the way breeders do.

Welcome, Merc's mum! Kudos to you for being supportive of Merc and Rowan's choice to be CF. I am glad you stopped in to say hello and express your opinion...please don't be a stranger!

There are no rules aganst PNBs posting here on this site, as long as they are supportive of the CF choice. I have no problem with it, either, as it is good to see actual parents who agree with us about all of the bad parenting we rant about. It is good to have their viewpoints.

We just don't want breeders to come here and bingo us to death, or sit and wax poetic about how wonderful it is to be a parunt, and how no other lifestyle is acceptable.

My own mother always said to me "none to make you laugh and none to make you cry" that old adage is still relevant.

I do not expect my sons to produce children against their own wishes.
That is not a good idea at all. I had always told them that if either wished to have children that they must understand that I was not then nor at any time a free childminder. people must make their own decisions regarding children or anything else for that matter in a relationship. I also told them that a relationship is also about being best friends, that outlasts anything else.

I am prepared to give them my views on anything they need to discuss but it is only my view and they must make the final decision themselves.

Merc's Mum, I am glad you made it clear you are not going to be an unpaid child-minder. A lot of these young single mothers or even married mums will believe their own moms "owe" it to them to take care of the grandkids free-of-charge and at the drop of a phone call. As if an older person does not have a life of his/her own! I have read many letters to newspaper advice columnists from breeders whining how Grandma refuses to take on the "privilege" of spending time with the grandkid aka "free babysitting". Grandparents write in stating how they are having trouble with adult children thinking that the words "grandma & grandpa" means unpaid child care.

"FUCK WORK"

Well I am of the opinion I brought my own sons up didn't have anyone to look after them and then blame them because they were not up to my standards of behaviour. If they choose to have children they should bring them up themselves. Once you get to a certain age its time for you not for children of any age.

Parents are entitled to have a childfree life as well. they have done their job bringing up their own and now its the turn of their offspring to do they same. They are also usually expected to carry out the childminding for free.

If they were a proper parent they most likely gave up a lot of their own personal freedom when those children were young. Tough luck its now the turn of the oldies to have a life of their own.