New Addition... LOAF HAS ARRIVED

On my way out the door for a weekend away with friends... YIPPEE.... but thought I'd share this news first.

Well... the loaflet was taken from the oven on Wednesday. A little over 2 weeks early. Why? Harpitina got her doctor to induce labor because she only has 6 weeks mooternity leave... and she's already been off for 3 of them. She needs to be back at work in 3 weeks. So.. loafy only weighed 5 lbs !! That is a bit light in this day and age... isn't it? So now... doctors are doing this labor inducing to get moo back to work.. AT the request of the parunts... yet... when we request to have tubes tied or something... they put up a stink.

Oh well... now the real fun begins for the new parunts. Time to sit back and see how it goes. Luckly we're too busy with our impending move and other fall activities to do any visiting with them. I may not see that underdone baked good for several months..... No problem.

Let the shitshow begin

That seems amazingly cruel and irresponsible on both the parts of the parents and doctors, to deliver a baby early due to what's basically a scheduling conflict. Or is that just me?

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kittehpeoples
That seems amazingly cruel and irresponsible on both the parts of the parents and doctors, to deliver a baby early due to what's basically a scheduling conflict. Or is that just me?

Agreed. Not sure about the development of the loaf but have heard they gain around 1+ lb. a week in the final month or so. I could understand inducing labor if she had hit the due date but why risk health issues due to low birth weight or induced early labor? I'm not convinced she will be back to work in 3 weeks, this doesn't sound likely given her health issues and all.

It does work out well for Starlady, as she is in the middle of a move and can postpone visits.

WTF?! No reputable/responsible doctor would induce premature labor without a damn good reason, such as a medical issue.

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What is a home without children? Quiet. ~Henny Youngman

I don't want people who want to dance, I want people who have to dance. ~George Balanchine

"I took the batteries out of my biological clock and put them in my vibrator"

I'm baaack.. from a very nice relaxing couple days with some friends at a camp ground near the ocean.

Well... Harpitina does work in the healthcare field and has known her doctor for a long time... Perhaps they worked something out. All I know is that Nephew said "they are going to induce labor so the baybee will be born in time for her to get back to work"

It's been very quiet now.... I guess the 'bonding' phase has begun.

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starlady
Well... Harpitina does work in the healthcare field and has known her doctor for a long time... Perhaps they worked something out. All I know is that Nephew said "they are going to induce labor so the baybee will be born in time for her to get back to work"

Oh, I believe it happened. I just think it was an awful and irresponsible thing for them to do.

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CF_Amy
WTF?! No reputable/responsible doctor would induce premature labor without a damn good reason, such as a medical issue.

No kidding! It's only a GODDAMN HUMAN BEING at stake. Ugh, what awful people, and they call US self-centered!

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"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny

I was telling some of my friends about it this weekend ... and they have heard of this happening before. The doctors will determine that the loaf is 'viable without support' at 1 to 2 weeks early that they will induce to make things more 'convenient' ...AND.... insurance covers this!!!

I always wonder how they explain away the stat that the loaf actually needs mommies care for at a minimum of the first 2-3 years. Can lead to problems later on in life. I tend to believe it: I think my moo farmed me out at the get go, and I have never bonded well with anything besides my cats.

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.

Well, the first week has passed and Dh just got off the phone with Nephew. He has already begun complaining about the cost of diapers and formula (apparently Harpitina has trouble beefing) Then he was complaining about health insurance and the fear that it won't cover everything. Next he was complaining about Harpitia being grouchy because when the kyd came out she got 'ripped up pretty bad' and has about 50 stitches in her 'hoo ha'

Well... can't say I didn't tell them so. Who listens to a wacko CF aunt?

Next I predict that the crying will be driving him nuts. Give that kyd a few weeks to develop more lung power. This show is well underway and has a l o n g way to go. Better have a good supply of popcorn and beer (or your snack of choice)

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twocents
I always wonder how they explain away the stat that the loaf actually needs mommies care for at a minimum of the first 2-3 years. Can lead to problems later on in life. I tend to believe it: I think my moo farmed me out at the get go, and I have never bonded well with anything besides my cats.

My mom spent 3 years at home with me when I was born (pretty standard here... good luck getting a job if you're a female between 20 and 50) and I'm not the bonding type either (except for cats) so I always thought this "first 2-3 years are all-important" theory is a nonsense. kid won't even remember those years.

Going back to work after a few weeks is crazy though, she won't even be able to sit...

Going back to work after a few weeks is crazy though, she won't even be able to sit...


Her job is sitting and standing and apparently she's having trouble with both at the moment. She is an LPN and works at a senior care facility. I don't see how all that is going to heal up enough for her to do her job in 3 weeks. She's not even supposed to drive for 6 weeks. Oh, Nephew is having his eyes really opened up now. The rainbows and unicorns are quickly fading (for him anyway)

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starlady
... 50 stitches in her 'hoo ha'

No. No no no no no no no no no no no noooooooooo.

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happyhiker

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starlady
... 50 stitches in her 'hoo ha'

No. No no no no no no no no no no no noooooooooo.

Can you imagine? Ewwwwww! It's probably not 50 but Nephew said it was more than 30 so... that's still a lot. I'll tell ya what.... that 'hoo ha' ain't gonna ever be the same again.

Not shaming large folks here but didn't you say in a previous Harpatina Hillarity thread that Moo was obese before getting in pig? If so, good luck losing that baby belly, Harpie.

Eta.. A word.

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twocents
I always wonder how they explain away the stat that the loaf actually needs mommies care for at a minimum of the first 2-3 years.

They don't. They clearly don't care. We wouldn't see so many bratty/feral/fucked up children if parents cared.

Harpitina had gastric bypass about 3 years ago. Lost a little over 100 lbs...then gained some back after she married Nephew. So she would have been considered obese when she got inpig.

Ya know... I feel there will be cheating in Nephew's future. He went out to play hockey last night (drove about 50 miles for the game) and then talked to my dh all the way home complaining about costs for baybee and how Harpitina is being so 'moody'

Yep... I see some discourse on the marital front.

All this was preventable... but.. lifescript must be followed.

Yes, I am glad I am busy with selling this house and getting ready to move. Ofcourse... dh said "we need to invite them down when we get in the house...so... they can get jealous"

LOL Can't believe he said that.

Just seeing her all ripped from ass to breakfast has got to make him want to run for the hills.

OMG.... loaf 'bit' Harpitina's boob... and made it bleed. (latest news from Nephew)

How the heck can a 1 week old 'bite'? Harpo lost it. Cried and threw her water bottle at Nephew.

One week in folks.... Reality bites... and so, apparently, does the loaf.


SERIOUSLY.. you can't make this stuff up.

I'm with starlady. a week old has no teeth. exaggeration perhaps on moos part?
broouuuuhhahhhhhhhaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaa
threw a water bottle
i see lawyers in the future....

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.

I remember my brother used to "bite" my mom. I think it's actually more like a pinch, but I guess it still hurts. She used to cry out, no water bottle throwing though.

Breast feeding is painful. Is she surprised by this?

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"Not every ejaculation deserves a name" - George Carlin

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LoveToLurk
I remember my brother used to "bite" my mom. I think it's actually more like a pinch, but I guess it still hurts. She used to cry out, no water bottle throwing though.

Breast feeding is painful. Is she surprised by this?

Methinks the rose colored glasses of delusion have a role in this.

All I can figure out is that so many breeders are in such denial they think they won't be subjected to all the parent challenges which show up in 1,999,454 plus searches on the internet now. I tend to think of this mentality as childish, that actions don't have consequences. Maybe one day scientists will discover some people's brain aren't fully developed until they hit 30 or later instead of age 25 as they estimate now. And maybe some of them haven't had to experience much in terms of consequences of their actions until the loaf pops out and leaves them with 30 plus stitches as a first dose of reality. Ouch!

Hey... Harpo is 35! Nephew is 34! So... maybe their brain development is more like 40? Maybe not at all? If they try for another one ..... I know they are bat guano nuts.

Dear Gawd

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Ya know... I feel there will be cheating in Nephew's future. He went out to play hockey last night (drove about 50 miles for the game) and then talked to my dh all the way home complaining about costs for baybee and how Harpitina is being so 'moody'

Holy crap, the kid is less than a week old and he's already trying to get the f out of there? That's not a good sign and frankly Harpatina has reason to be pissed. She just shat a watermelon (that he wanted too) out of her cooter and is stitched up and he's not hanging around to help*

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Can you imagine? Ewwwwww! It's probably not 50 but Nephew said it was more than 30 so... that's still a lot.

Holy crap, if I still had a uterus I think it would have shriveled up and died, reading that.

*These two deserve each other.