*sigh* Paris Hilton-clone cousin returns to torment me

(I apologize for my profanity, which may offend. ^_^)

Well, you may know me (16-year-old who's already firmly set in her CFness) from my rants about "Danica", my stupid spoiled 13-year-old cousin. She is coming back this June, and I want it to be over with already...She calls herself a cat lover and yet called me wimpy when she asked me why I cried like a baby the first day of having to dissect a pregnant cat in my AP bio class (GEE, stupid spoiled whorechild, d'ya think I might care about the poor dead KITTENS that the other girls were shoving in my face and laughing about when I had to run out of the room?!) Poor little stupid spoiled whore got only $300 in gift cards to Wal-Mart for her birthday (which I had to chip in to) and then had the nerve to complain in her card to ME (no thanks whatsoever) about how it "wasn't enough" (!!). She also stole some of my jewelry, and my mom and her mom "Rhondi" forced me to give it to her (!!). Logic vacuum alert! I also had to entertain poor little Paris Hilton the whole time she was here at Christmas, act as Mrs. Chauffeur to her damn beauty pageant (She won Little Miss Mullet Festival--I hope she gets huge thighs), let her fucking FLIRT with my boyfriend (my parents thought it was 'cute'), never get a moment to myself and my boyfriend Andy...the list goes on. I'm calling Taylor STAT and handing my stuff over to her. Any other tips for survival?

Tahki-chan, if I were in your shoes, I'd be volunteering for something away from home this summer! If you're just a few days away from turning 17, check out Americorps (kind of like the Peace Corps, only here in America). Other than that, I'd focus on deciding which college you want to go to, get out of town when you graduate, and DON'T look back! Good luck!

Oh yeah, and if that fails...take a nice dump in her suitcase.

I'm with Feh.

Much more effective at letting someone know they aren't exactly "welcome" in your home.