Halloween

This year, I will give out candy to the kids that come knocking on my door. I do this because generally the kids that come trick or treating to my house seem to be normal kids who are polite, and do not demand candy.

However, I will stop giving out the goods at 6PM. The ghetto, I mean the town right next to me has a curfew of 6. After these hoodrats are done collecting in their town, their moos drive them to my much nicer town to keep on collecting. I fucking refuse to give a damn thing to these @#$%& welfare apes. Most are rude, run from house to house, and don't bother to say thank you. The brats run from block to block, then at the end of the street hop in slut-moo's welfare paid for van, and continue to the next street. They don't even walk!

I will not contribute to this. If I have any problem whatsoever with the hoodrats, I will not hesitate to call the police. Also, my huge labrador retriever with even larger teeth does not like people he does not know fucking around in his yard.

Merry Samhain everyone!

We actually like trick or treat in our neighborhood. The kids who come by are all pretty much, nice kids. They say thank you and greet us at the door.

We have a few rotten brats in our neighborhood but luckily, if they DO come to our house, they are dressed as nice, polite children. LOL

I love halloween, because I am a dork who likes to wear costumes. I am a sheep this year. However, if I could get some crappie (capri) pants, crocs, a tri-color wig, hugeass stroller with a couple kids in it all holding starbucks cups, and a blue tooth to wear, I'd be a great Sheeple...damnit, why didn't I think of that sooner!

"It truly is the one commonality that every designation of humans you can think of has, there's at least one asshole."
--Me

Yay, I live in an apartment this year! Yay, all the outside doors to get into the building are locked! Yay, all my candy is for ME!!

I had a dream the other night that someone in my building propped the outside door so trick-or-treaters could get in. I was like "HELL NO" and un-propped it, lol.

I love Halloween too. Wish I could go trick-or-treating myself, frankly (ah, for the days of college when a lot of the teachers lived near campus and so you always knew at least they'd give you candy).

I love Halloween!!!! I wanted to dress up as Marge Simpson, but that blue hair is really a problem (keeping it propped up sky high, doncha know).

I live in an residential area where they bus the white trash over. These creeps stare at you and when I stare back, the best they can come up with is, "I want candy."

I direct them to the Wal-Mart, 1/2 miles from me, and shut the door.

Bite me!

Or I don't give them candy until they go through the script. Once they say thank you, I refrain from thrusting my hand in their trick or treat bag and retrieving the candy I'd given them.

I only handed out candy for 1-1/2 hours (the onslaught started at 6 pm). Even thought I'd turned off the porch light, turned off the living room lights, brats were ringing the doorbell at 8:30 pm (why aren't they at home by then? Don't the rugrats have school the next day - it is THURSDAY, not SATURDAY).

Also, a lot of assholes were slooooowly going up one of the main streets to the business district so those of us who desperately needed real food had to detour or honk incessantly for them to move. If I'd had my cell phone with me, I would have reported the shitheads to the police (because down our street, police were driving through the neighborhood, thank goodness).

Next year, I'm going to a theatre that's showing "Rocky Horror Picture Show."



Why don't their dumbass parents teach them some bloody manners, for crying out loud?

I was giving out candy yesterday to this little neighbor kid when his moo asks if I have "little ones". I am the only CF person in like 100 miles so I had the feeling this neighbor was fishing.

I usually can't think of good comebacks until after the fact, but today I looked down at my boobs & blurted out "no, I have 2 big ones".

She was stunned. Ahhh...I do love Halloween, but I love messing with moos and their assanine questions even more.

I no longer do Halloween for the kids. I had a fun idea for the grown-ups, though. I tried it on a small scale yesterday.

I went to the grocery store and got what I considered to be *good* candy. Dove milk chocolates, Ghirardelli mint squares, Lindor truffles, and Werther's Originals as non-chocolate filler. I wish I could have found liquor-filled chocolates to reinforce the grown-up nature of the candy. (Little ones can stomach the waxy chocolate in Hershey's kisses, but I sure as heck can't.)

I put these goodies into little Halloween cups.

Then I went to work and gave those treats to my adult friends, wishing them a Happy Halloween. I would joke "Screw the kids, this is adult candy" and they would laugh out loud and thank me for the unexpected gesture.

I'd love to do it on a larger scale next year, maybe dress up and go "trick or treating" except *giving* people nice candy when they answer the door instead of begging for candy. It would be a fun way to thank all the people in my neighborhood for being willing to give goodies to other people's children (on every darned holiday that breeders have taken over "for the kids") and never receive anything in return.

Anyone got any cool ideas to make this even more fun?

Sibyl Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I no longer do Halloween for the kids. I had a
> fun idea for the grown-ups, though. I tried it on
> a small scale yesterday.
> Then I went to work and gave those treats to my
> adult friends, wishing them a Happy Halloween. I
> would joke "Screw the kids, this is adult candy"
> and they would laugh out loud and thank me for the
> unexpected gesture.
>
> I'd love to do it on a larger scale next year,
> maybe dress up and go "trick or treating" except
> *giving* people nice candy when they answer the
> door instead of begging for candy. It would be a
> fun way to thank all the people in my neighborhood
> for being willing to give goodies to other
> people's children (on every darned holiday that
> breeders have taken over "for the kids") and never
> receive anything in return.
>
> Anyone got any cool ideas to make this even more
> fun?

Great idea, though you might have to explain it...
I've always wanted to have a huge, decadent, ADULT party on Halloween AND combine it with handing out candy. Just the thought of answering the door with a bunch of ADULTS partying in the background and NO KIDS IN SIGHT, fills me with glee, or shaddenfreude...

I think I'd have a special basket of tiny booze bottles to give to the parents, or maybe just offer them a swig off whatever bottle I was drinking from.

"It truly is the one commonality that every designation of humans you can think of has, there's at least one asshole."
--Me

I'd give out candy if I could put up a sign: "all ages welcome, but must have a *creative* costume." I could deal with answering the door and giving out candy to see what good shit people came up with (and I think adults could do better ones than kids could), but I wouldn't want to waste my time with someone who couldn't do any better than grabbing something shitty off the sale rack at Meijer's.

I'd give out candy if I could put up a sign: "all ages welcome, but must have a *creative* costume."

At least the people in your neighborhood dress up! Sorry, but it pisses me off when people are too lazy and/or cheap to put their kids in at least a mask and a cape!