Dad beat dad.......... of course he is!

Here's a gem from TMC:


04.16.08 2:25p I am meeting my lawyer in one hour to review the proper way for my DD's 'sperm donor' to sign off his rights.
He has been involved with her for 3 years (she's 5 now) and has come to the point that he will not call her or pick her up when he says he is going to, and called me to tell me he never wanted to be a dad. He has been the perfect example of a deadbeat dad, as his work and partying is more important to him than she ever was. But she was just so excited to finally fit in and have a 'dad'. My heart breaks for her, but I know my bf has been more of a dad to her than he ever was. Loser is too kind a word for him.

The bitch probably got knocked up on purpose, hoping to land her a mayun, hoping to change him, and when that didn't happen, now she's pissed......... and of course he's a dead beat.

From the snippet you posted, I would guess that she thinks she can unilaterally terminate bio-dad's rights—that is, without his agreement. As a rule, it does not work that way except in cases of extreme abuse and the like, and child protective services and other authorities will then be involved.

Her main goal seems to be to stop him from seeing the daughter at all, as this little bit does not mention whether he is paying child support as he is supposed to. He probably is, or else she would have complained about that. Instead, her focus is on the child's "unimportance" to Duh, as she describes it. And this is only one side of the story. She sounds nasty enough to interfere with his visitation.

She might even be deluded enough to believe that he'll somehow still be obligated to pay child support if by some chance he agrees to terminate his rights and a judge permits it. Ha ha. Not so, of course. My brother's girlfriend, who had had his child, was under this delusion. She rescinded her offer to my bro to have him sign away his rights when she realized this.

If no other man, such as her present boyfriend, is willing to adopt the girl immediately and assume the legal responsibility, ordinarily no judge will terminate the father's rights. The judge will not want the possibility of the moo going on welfare for lack of a responsible male party.

I'm not a lawyer, not giving legal advice, etc., and your mileage may vary.

Shit like this burns my ass. I agree with both of you. In my opinion, the give away about this woman's piss poor attitude is her bit about how her boyfriend was more of a father than "sperm donor" ever was.

Let's take her at her word for a moment, shall we? Assume he's an asshole. Where's Mom's accountability for choosing this dead beat to breed with? If he is that much of a loser, do you mean to tell me there were no signs of his incompetence before hand? Now she has another mayuuun that's playing the role just the way she wants it so she wants to replace the original wallet with the thicker one.

My bf has a kid. (Don't hold that against me as far as CFness goes) He pays close to $800 a month in support and tuition and constantly fights for time with the child. To be completely fair, that's the price he pays for having a child with someone of low character. Ex has a new hubby and tries to get the kid to accept the new guy as dad because "he does such a better job". Meanwhile she's telling the kid that his real dad is nothing but a dead beat.

gsmith, I feel your pain. My SO has 2 grown brats also and his ex made him out to be nothing but a walking wallet and a dead beat to those 2 kids, which is why they don't bother with him.

He's currently in the process of TRYING to get emancipated his 22 year old 6th year college student daughter who's failed 5 of the 6 years she's been in school. This shit has been going on for nearly a fucking year. The bitch cunt face ex of his is just dragging it out. I would never have given him the time of day has those brats been young when we met. Putting up with that shit is for the birds.

You have to be careful with just about anyone... If they have grown kids, you may get inundated with grandsprogs..

So many of these idiot bimbos have this lala land fantasy... you hear it on Dr Phil, Dr Laura and others... they all sound the same.. "But I thaaawwwt", "Why won't he step up to the plate", 'whine whine whine'.

Instead of adopting the kid out to an intact home, they play brave little single moo, and proceed to find more shack ups and wreak havoc on the kids lives with their baby mama drama.
oh well.

gsmith Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Where's Mom's accountability for choosing this dead beat to
> breed with? If he is that much of a loser, do you
> mean to tell me there were no signs of his
> incompetence before hand?

I have to disagree with this. My Mom was with my "dad" for 8 years before I was born (married for 3). He was great with the nieces and nephews and everything; she wanted to have a family and he seemed to want the same thing very much.

And then he started cheating on her when she was pregnant with me. And she kicked him out as soon as I was born. And she never asked for a dime of child support, even though she had every right to. My "father" IS a deadbeat piece of crap, and my Mom had NO idea he would turn into one or she wouldn't have had me.

Medusa, you are the exception to the rule. There is a whole subculture of oopsing or "He'll love it once he gets here," built upon the fantasy that reluctant dudes will enjoy parenting. (After they are tricked into it.)

I blame the woman in those types of situations---the ones who oopsea guy or are so baby-rabid they refuse to acknowledge the signs. They act like saints when in reality they contributed to their own situations. Your mom isn't in that category.

Hell, your mom was married, which is 95% more than most of these Hos bother to do.

Call me callous, but I think that once you know that ‘sperm + egg = baby’ and you STILL don’t take the oh-so-easy precautions necessary to prevent that unwanted outcome (as well as many others), you have to shoulder a good deal of the blame. We talk about how these women aren’t married to the men, and haven’t even known some of them for very long – but the same is true for the men; so I can’t see them as hapless, innocent victims when they’re choosing to put it all in the hands of women they don't know -- because those women DO show signs that the men willingly ignore because they're so happy to be getting laid.