Apparently, she didn't get it

Last week I told y'all of an invitation I received from my cousin (whom I've nothing in common with) for a "4th of July party" which...OH! included their brats' 1 year old b-day celebration as well...on July FIFTH...coincidentally of course. Well, the invitation, which I finally received, said RSVP. Okay. I didn't RSVP. So, one would assume I'm not going, right?

I get a phone call this morning: "Hi T_ _ _ _ , [some small b.s. talk]...so, did you get the invitation?'
Me: "Yes"
Her: "So are you coming?"
Me: "No"
Her: "Why?"
Me: "I have other plans"
Her: "Oh. OK. Well, everybody's going to be there, including _ _ _ "(my brother, who she knows I'm crazy about - it was a lure)
Me: "Yea, I know but I'm not going to make it because I have other plans"
Her: "Weeeeeell, oooohh-kay then, I guess we'll see ya later"

Now, what part of my initial non-response to the RSVP was not clear? Am I missing something people? You don't CALL people who DON'T RSVP!!!! They don't want to go/can't go/had something come up more important than your ONE year olds' b-day-fucking party - whatever. And to try and lure me there because my brother is going - FUCK YOU!

actually I disagree with you on this one. You are supposed to respond either way with an RSVP. Is is that hard to call someone and say you can't make it? Brat party or not its just common courtesy.

Theresa is right. "RSVP" = please respond either way (am or am not coming). This is especially necessary for elaborate shindigs involving food and table preparations in which an accurate count of the number attending is needed before the event.

thought if your not going there is no need to respond, well i learned something today!!!!!!!

Thats annoying! having to call these idiots and tell them your not going, what a pain in the ass, who needs to be guilted into something that you have ZERO interest in, they are just inviting you for a free gift grab and some cooing over the failed condom.

If you received the invitation in writing, I would have responded the same way. If the invitation came from an Internet service (such as evite), I would have declined over that web site. This should have avoided the phone call from the breeder.

I hear a lot about one-year-old birthday parties. WTF? Like the brat will enjoy and remember it?! Yeah, make that one-year-old gift-grab parties! Now I get it.

Keep working more hours, CF people! Millions of breeders depend on us.

Well, it does have different meanings and can be interpreted in different ways I suppose:

Répondez S'il Vous Plaît:

Please Respond (Répondez S'il Vous Plaît)
or
Reserve Seats Via Phone
or
Return Soon Via Phone
or
Remember (to) Send Valuable Presents

I think it's ridiculous to send someone an invitation asking them to call if they're going to come. And call if they're NOT coming. I've sent RSVP's to some rockin' parties at my house and those that didn't call didn't come. And even if they did, you always make more food then necessary 'just in case'. For fucks' sake, you need an RSVP for a ONE YEAR OLD? Whatever.

In any case, I sit corrected and have learned something new, thank you for that. However in the future, I will send a response via mail as catmeow suggested. And stick a 42 cent stamp and waste my valuable time, and my paper and ink to do it.

I do agree on that there should be an e-mail address as well as a phone number to respond to. That is what I do now and it is a lot more convenient for a lot of people.

If I knew the party involved food and drinks, I would call and RSVP to say I can't make it. I think the hostess needs to know how many people to buy food for. Of course, nothing is wrong with not going if you don't want to.

High School reunions and other pay your own way events are a whole other ball of wax from other events that you would be expected to RSVP to.

I just got married. My wedding was small, only 25 people. A few people didn't send the RSVP card back and I had to call them, which was annoying because I was extra busy with last minute wedding stuff. I needed to know exact counts for the caterer, and once I gave a number I would have had to pay for that many people, whether they showed up or not. The funny part is, the people who didn't RSVP were all yesses! "Oh, yes, we are coming, we thought you knew that." Nope, sorry, I left my psychic hat at home today, that's what the card was for.

I also had a similar problem when I got married, we had a small wedding also and we had to call people who didn't RSVP.

Turns out some of them were angry that I didn't include their childrens' names on the invitations. I mean they were huffed, puffed and indigant about it.

What a needy pain in the ass. I'm sure if it were just a plain old 4th of July party, she wouldn't care who came, but since it's Shitford's birthday also, well, breeders see that shit as nothing but a gift grab. Glad you didn't go.

Yeah, I agree with the others, you should respond either way to an RSVP. However, when you do respond, you don't have to give a reason for not attending. You could just say I can't make it, and that's it.

str8six Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Well, it does have different meanings and can be
> interpreted in different ways I suppose:
>
> Répondez S'il Vous Plaît:
>
> Please Respond (Répondez S'il Vous Plaît)
> or
> Reserve Seats Via Phone
> or
> Return Soon Via Phone
> or
> Remember (to) Send Valuable Presents
>
> I think it's ridiculous to send someone an
> invitation asking them to call if they're going
> to come. And call if they're NOT coming. I've
> sent RSVP's to some rockin' parties at my house
> and those that didn't call didn't come. And even
> if they did, you always make more food then
> necessary 'just in case'. For fucks' sake, you
> need an RSVP for a ONE YEAR OLD? Whatever.
>
> In any case, I sit corrected and have learned
> something new, thank you for that. However in the
> future, I will send a response via mail as catmeow
> suggested. And stick a 42 cent stamp and waste my
> valuable time, and my paper and ink to do it.

I'm glad you decided not to go! Strong arming you with your brother's presence is stupid. RSVP does tend to mean please reply in some fashion, but I'm glad you stuck to your guns.

Well, like I said I have learned something new. I didn't have a wedding. We went to the courthouse, paid 10 bucks, were married and went about our business. We just couldn't see spending all that money for a wedding. Which is fine if that's what you want, we just loved each other and wanted to get hitched. Didn't bother with all the hoop-la, just threw on a pair of jeans and went. We had my parents and his dad attend the 'ceremony', then went for dinner - no biggie, 10+ years later and we're happier now than we were then. It's only getting better, I love being married.

I've not attended very many huge shin-digs where you had to rsvp, but when I have and I wanted to go, of course I did call. This is the first one that I can remember not going to now that I think about it. RSVP for a one year old where there's hot dogs and chips *rolls eyes*, whatever. Mom said basically that's what it was. Oh and course, the gift grab...awwwwwwwwww - NOT.

My brother's kid is turning one this month. They are also having a huge party, I mean Gift Grab, at a hotel for fark's sake! They expect everyone to pay hundreds of dollars for a plane ticket to go out and see them, on top of the expected lavish gifts. GMAFB! They won't return my calls since I said I can't go (a plane ticket would cost over $300) - I had sent my brother a nice b-day gift recently but of course no response because OMFG I am not going to drop EVERYTHING and go to a one year old's party. This really pisses me off because I flew out to see them on a moment's notice when the baybee was born. Of course, since I don't have the time/resources/interest to see the baybee (and won't allow them to shove the baybee at my baybee-allergic husband) every three months, I am a horrible aunt...oh well.