Dear parent

Dear complaining parent,
I am sick of hearing about how you are tired, are extremely busy, and that I cannot understand because I do not have kids.
You are right, I cannot understand, and decided to put myself in your shoes and to try to describe my day the way you do.

"I am sooo tired. Today I had to get up at 6AM, take a shower,put on make up and a suit, make coffee, drink it and head out of my flat at 7.
I then had to ride 20 miles to work all the while trying to dodge the SUVs of the (non working) moms taking their kids to school , and let's just say the way these people swerve in and out of traffic is a bit scary at best.
I then spent 8 hours in my office working my ass off.
I did leave at 4.30pm just as you did, but please keep in mind that I came in at 8 while you came in at 9 because you have to take your kids to school and that I did not take a lunch break.
I went to the gym and spent 1 hour weightlifting, got home, put dirty laundry in the machine, vacuumed, moped the floor, put laundry in dryer,cut veggies for dinner, checked bank account online, opened mail, paid bills online, checked my personal email and returned emails/phone calls to friends, agreeing on plans for the weekend.
I then put away clean laundry, poured myself a drink, helped myself to a plate of food,read, watched a movie and FINALLY got to bed at 12"

Now you will notice I endeavoured to use the same tone you use, but thing is, I am ill at ease with the whole thing.
See, I actually think it is normal to get in the shower/put on clothes/prepare my food/clean my place.
And I think of working out, going out, calling friends back, reading as a pleasure, so aping your way and describing those as chores...that feels dishonest.

And as much as I would like to sit on my ass all day and rake in the cash I understand that I have to work,and in fact quite enjoy my job.
Sorry about the fact that you and some others gripe that I never go to lunch with you but you see,I'd rather spend the least possible amount of time in the office in order to have some time left for myself at the end of the day.

And you know, that remark about my "always leaving early" today really pissed me off, but I am not sure you can do the math regarding working hours.
I myself cannot cease to wonder at your hours since you are supposed to work full time, but see, I think that if you meet all your deadlines and do a good job, there is no problem with leaving early to pick up your kids at school, I'm even glad you are able to do so.

Please also keep in mind that as I am ranking higher then you, I think that showing your distaste for the way I choose to organize my work schedule is inapropriate.

Next time, dear complaining parent, we'll talk about how the way you are trying to force family values on society and culture as a whole is making it bland and unappealing, about the way you are trying to make all public space a family friendly place (and we'll have a good long talk about the parents I saw once at the museum who complained that the art was disturbing their kids, and about those at a punk rock show at 11pm who were going around complaining about people drinking, smoking and having adult conversartion in front of their kids)

We'll try to figure why it is normal for your kids to run around -on hardwood floors-shrieking on a Sunday at 7.

We'll also try to figure out why, when I came across you in the hallway right after you moved in , we had this very stange conversation.
- were you the one coming back home in the middle of the night this weekend?
-Hi,well, yes, did I make any noise?(baffled)
-No I just happened to see you (evil sidelong glance,turns back, leaves, slams door)

Next time.
Because tonight, dear parent, I am just so sick of you.



I'm new to the board so I wanted to say hello to you guys and thanks for the opportunity to rant and the laughs I had reading your posts!
(please do not hesitate to correct me: I promise I'll make an effort but I am not an english speaker..)

Damn! You "sound" like and English speaker to me.

Welcome! And here's a quick question for you. Why "Deliverance"? In my part of the world, that term can have some pretty unsavory connotations. Just curious...

:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr
:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr:yr


Keep this up and you'll have more of these than Annie.

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

Thanks for the welcome, I really feel better getting that off my chest!

>Guest: well, Deliverance is a great book, and my BF and I just were joking about "squeal like a pig" because of the kids upstairs :
I lived in London for a while but am scared my "french therefore not able to speak another language properly" genes will come back to bite me in the butt sometime.
>poofy_puff: hi, fellow "crazy cat person who doesn't have kids" :hello:

Welcome there Deliverance (listening to 'dueling banjos')

Heck yeah, I just added 2 more 'cause my aunt is moving to a new place and she can't take all of hers (at least not right away). Check out these names:

Zizi Vatou

and

Pamphagus P'nut

I try to stick with names like "Jason", "Frankie", "Barack" and "Poofy" (Poofy's real name is "Lilya").

http://www.catster.com/family/612118

They're not all up there yet. I'm working on it.

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

Great post, De;overamce amd welcome.

I love how paruhnts whine and carry on, then go out and act as if their life hasn't changed since sprogging. I am so sick and tired of "family values" that I cannot even put it into words. And the fact that few, if any, working breeders carry their share of the load at work royally pisses me off as well.

Great stuff!

From what I witness, 'family values' equals nothing more than

a) I and my children are the only ones who matter in the world.
b) Screw you.

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"The death of creativity is a pram in the hallway"
- Cyril Connolly

Good post Deliverance! I am new too, although I have been lurking for months. I can't seem to get joined up though, probably doing something stupid on my part, so I just started doing the "enter name and email" every time. I hope to get a response from admin soon. Anyway, I loved that part in the movie where they had Ned Beatty "squeal like a pig", that was some pretty racy stuff for that time period too.

Now, as for these co-workers who expect special treatment because they have done the world a favor by breeding, they make me sick to my stomach. I have noticed throughout the years that the ones who start any sentence with, "My children are the most important thing in the world to me, MY KIDS COME FIRST", are the very ones whose actions tell a different story. That's what they want us to believe because saying this has worked so well to solicit sympathy from the average person in the past, since kids are the new sacred cow. If the kid has ANY "special needs", so called, which could include ADHD, Autism, color blindness, acne, or has an infected hang nail, you can expect them to milk that for all it's worth and for you to pick up the slack.

In reality though, their moms or the baby daddy moms are raising those kids 99% of the time, while the "single moms" take time off to go to the beach, leave early to get a jump start on partying, or to lay in bed and sleep off a hangover, or to lay up with a man. If you will notice, the first weekend of the month when they get paid, aka the welfare check arrives, is when they suddenly seem to have to have time off "for my baby". I have caught them in lies enough times in the past to know this is true. The average married moos with calf are not much better either, but in my experience the "single moms" are by far the WORST co-workers.

Welcome, Deliverance.

You have scored major points in my neck of the woods for describing the cultural desert being created by the resources suckers known as breeders.

they are successfully dumbing us down, and sanding the edge that maikes life fun.

It's good to have you here.

Whoop whoop!
Awesome post!
Welcome new members...and members to be!

"It truly is the one commonality that every designation of humans you can think of has, there's at least one asshole."
--Me